We haven’t had a caption contest in a hot minute! This cover was sent in by Jen, who had this to say:
There are just no words to describe how bonkers this looks.
Very Chuck Tingle-esque, don’t you think?
Comment below with your caption! Caption that cover however you wish! You can come up with a new title or tagline. A winner will be randomly selected at the end of the contest!
The best captioner will receive a $10 bookstore credit to a book retailer of their choosing.
Standard disclaimers apply: We are not being compensated for this giveaway. Void where prohibited. Open to international residents where permitted by applicable law. Must be over 18. Regardless of the mermaid above, please practice motorcycle safety and wear you helmets. Comments will close Friday, October 21, 2022 around noon ET, and a winner will be announced shortly thereafter.
Good luck!
The winning caption comes from Deborah:
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: a unicorn, a brontotaur, and a mermaid walk into a biker bar and the garden gnome behind the bar says…
Garden gnome with the thousand-yard stare: “You won’t believe the things I’ve seen…and participated in.”
Ya’ll figure it out and let me know. I’m gonna eat.
The real reason “Have It Your Way” was discontinued.
Book characters (glancing round to make sure author is out of earshot): ‘Sennnndddd helllllpppp’.
We’re all this and a bag of chips. Wait, we don’t have any chips – OK, who forgot the chips?
Microdosing be damned: Inside Stix Hiscock’s last, best acid trip
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: a unicorn, a brontotaur, and a mermaid walk into a biker bar and the garden gnome behind the bar says…
(with apologies to the Everly Brothers)
“Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Dream, dream, dream, dream”
“I can’t believe I forgot the dash!” – cover designer’s only regret
Too much of a good thing … is not this cover.
Clip art for beginners!
Is she planning on eating that burger the size of her head or is it an offering for bronto-dude?
In my head-canon this is a m/m book about the unicorn and the dino-guy. The mermaid is the wacky roommate who unintentionally interupts all their intimate moments because of her constant motorcycle accidents. (insert ALL the fish on a bicycle jokes here). The gnome is her motorcycle instructor (little dude is obviously traumatized)
When your cat sits on your keyboard while you’re in Photoshop.
“Got it! For the next set of commercials we send the Roaming Gnome to the Island of Dr. Moreau. He goes motorcyling, he sees some landscapes, he has an orgy… you know, whatever. The print campaign is a collage of all his adventures.”
“It’ll be amazing.”
EVERYBODY IN THE POOL!!!!!
I wasn’t sure if that was a sub sandwich, but it’s my favorite part of this hahahaha
Can we comment on the author’s name? Stix His Cock. Really author!? What a name. Some one clearly thinks they are a very amusing person. As for the caption……. ” Not today Thingys, Not.To. Day.”
Every sandwich for every BODY. Free delivery
Prehistoric One Horned Menage—one horn is all it takes
A horny and ROARing good time
(Is it about the unicorn? motorcycle or the dinos? Who knows)
“If I ran the zoo…”. Or maybe “You didn’t lock the gate again!”
All the things, all the time.
Honestly this looks like a bonkers Burger King commercial when the ad department was trying to outdo Old Spice.
When worlds collide, and collide, and collide.
“Get on losers, we’re goin’ catfishin'”
Bronto to gnome waiter: I’ll have a tunacorn on rye with a side of tube steak*. To go.
*Does anyone younger than me even know that term anymore?
I don’t have a caption, but I really really really want to be able sing this to the tune of “One-eyed one-horned flying purple people eater”.
I know he wasn’t yet around in prehistoric times but…Jesus wept.
And this is your book on drugs…
Welcome to the Kaiju Preservation Society via The Tingleverse.
Maybe those mushrooms weren’t the best addition to the burger…
Disney fairy tales gone wild.
Tagline for a print ad:
“One of the few things more disturbing than campaign ads. Even if it is more plausible…”
Can you say…BUSY?!
What does it say about me that my first thought was “what’s on top of that burger bun”?
Everything everywhere all at once, but in a bad way.
It’s LL Bean’s new ad for the comfy flannel PJ bottoms that dino guy is wearing.
It’s not what you think.
Look again.
Got it yet?
It’s not a hamburger.
It’s a bagel.
…still better than the Cats movie.
gNOme, gNOme..just…gNOOOOOOOme