B-
The protagonist of Fabulous Bodies, Poppy, appears on the scene as a horrible person who has survived a horrible childhood. Early on, she meets someone who says, “I’m not a bad guy. I’m just a survivor.” Over the course of the novel, Poppy learns what the difference is. This story by Chuck Tingle is a gory horror-thriller that I absolutely ate up, but be prepared for a high body count and a lot of implausibility.
Poppy is a single mom who works as an influencer by day, and she works hard at presenting a consistent and aspirational image. She has 216,000 followers, a number that is repeated several times throughout the book. She has a side job as a modern day grave robber, conning her way into picking up bodies from funeral homes (“Listen, there’s a four-year-old over in Barstow who will be blind by morning if I don’t get those corneas”) and selling them to people who want to do various gross things with them.
Poppy is deeply saddened by the sudden death of her idol, singer Eddie Michaels. She is then offered an exorbitant sum of money to pick up a body. Imagine her surprise when the body is that of Eddie’s, and he is alive, at least sort of, and he can compel people, including her, to obey his every command. He commands her to be his driver for the night, and they proceed to careen through Palm Springs while Eddie tries to complete a mysterious errand, slaughtering people along the way. It turns out that nothing makes you re-evaluate your values and life choices like being under the thrall of an iconic pop-rock supernatural mass murderer.
Poppy is (initially) selfish, shallow, and ruthless, but she is also funny. Here she is convincing a guy at a funeral home to let her take a body from the premises and drive off with it in her refrigerated box truck:
Regardless of the care I’ve taken to blend in, I still wield an incredible power. This kid behind the counter will inevitably bend over backward for me, not just because I’m particularly skilled at what I do (and I am skilled at what I do), but because I also employ a mighty force of nature that has tempted heroes and toppled empires, a power that will reign over brains or brawn for centuries to come.
Even in this humbled state, tucked away under all this cover, I still look fucking amazing.
What am I supposed to do, lie about it?
In my own internal monologue?
One thing I’ve learned from real-life survivor stories is that sometimes the same traits that allow a person to survive extreme situations are the same traits that make everyday life and relationships difficult for them. Poppy survived a traumatic childhood by being persistent, ambitious, and completely focused on her own material success. She thinks of herself as a shark, and tries to convince her young daughter to also think of herself as a shark. As the night progresses, Poppy reconsiders how she wants to mother her daughter. It was satisfying to see Poppy turn from ‘shark’ to ‘mama bear’.
This is a book that requires a lot of suspension of disbelief. I have no problem accepting the various supernatural elements, but I don’t believe that Eddie could murder so many people and not draw more attention. Despite his frequent claims to leave no traces of his or Poppy’s presence, his plan really doesn’t make a lot of sense if you think too hard about it.
Also, I had a problem with so much carnage befalling people who have no character, often no names or lines, and who are basically just cannon fodder for the story. I realize this is inconsistent of me, as I loved Lucky Day, in which millions of people die off page and a lot of other people die on the page. There was just something tonally that didn’t work for me – the combination of camp and grotesque violence was not my cup of tea. It was especially jarring because a big theme of the book is the value of human life and how we honor it by honoring the dead.
I got caught up in practicalities, but this is very much not a practical kind of story. I spent ages expecting a certain character to get woozy from blood loss but they didn’t even slap on a bandaid (granted, they were in a hurry). The plot and the horror-thriller-comedy tone of the book requires the reader to just go along for the ride (pun intended) and not worry about this kind of thing.
This book was way, way too violent and bloody for me but this did not stop me from wolfing it down. Sometimes I enjoyed it and sometimes I didn’t, but I never considered taking a reading break for even a second. The pace is fast, you never know what will happen next, and Poppy’s attempts to thwart Eddie are clever. I enjoyed Poppy’s character development and the way the narration convinced me to be deeply invested in her fate despite my initial dislike of her. Her arc is very well written and constructed and she was a compelling character.
I recommend this book for anyone with a strong stomach who likes bloody, gory horror and is looking for an attention-grabbing, up all night read. It broke a reading slump of mine through sheer plot momentum. If you like this sort of horror, you will love this book and you are a stronger soul than I!
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