I made a tactical error with this book. While I originally picked this one up because of the cover (a clearly plus size main character? Sold!) I read the acknowledgements before writing the review. In that piece of writing, it became clear just how much of the author’s own life was put on the page. Big things. Life changing things. It made me look at the book differently. I really enjoyed Vera Stein is Fine but the acknowledgements made it sit a little deeper in my heart.

Vera and Brody went to college together. Vera was desperately in love with Brody and Brody didn’t love her back, but Vera was useful to have around so he gave her scraps of affection, just enough to keep her hopeful that things might change between them. That maybe they might transform from secret fuck buddies to an actual loving relationship.

Brody becomes a famous actor and Vera works as his assistant for twenty years. I won’t give the details away but Vera loses her housing and her job and her mom in quick succession. So she retreats to the retirement village in Palm Springs where her gran, Ruby, moved.

There, two things happen. 1. She falls into a job as the community’s activities coordinator 2. She bumps into Eli, her ex-husband who she was married to for a day just after college. The full story of that marriage is revealed in flashbacks so I won’t say more than that. I will however say that Brody and Eli were college roommates and Vera thought Eli hated her.

In case I’m being too mysterious with the details, our couple is Vera and Eli.

There are plentiful family dynamics to navigate. And loads of baggage to shed for that HEA to happen.

Ruby, Vera’s grandmother, is a real piece of work. This is no nurturing, supportive grandmother. She’s also not a villain. She’s a nuanced flawed human who is also a pretty big part of the story. The amount of annoyance I felt towards Ruby on behalf of Vera speaks to how vivid the book’s characterisation was. So real did I find Ruby and Vera that my big emotions were fully engaged.

Eli’s growth and development from college times to his early 40s is already done by the time the story starts. He’s an emotionally mature grown up. It is Vera, starting over at 40, who has to do the growing in this story. She has to stop being okay with scraps of affection and decide to maybe one day do something with her writing. She has to learn that she deserves a full-hearted, publicly committed love.

Vera is self-conscious of her body. Some of the insecurities around her body were tough to read because I’m fat and I’ve had those thoughts about my body in the past and sometimes still today. I really appreciated that things like rolls and new stretch marks were described. She was clearly fat and not just in the euphemistic ‘I love your curves’ way.

This book also spoke directly to me in a small way because I am also starting over at 42. I’ve enrolled in law school and I’m one semester into my studies. Having my daughter lit a fire under my ass. Personally, it was a little tough to see how much time Vera ‘wasted’ with Brody, and it made me reflect specifically on my career and its meandering path.

If you’d like a big, full-hearted read, then I heartily recommend this book. I enjoyed Vera’s emotional growth, Eli’s steadiness, the complex family dynamics and a very satisfying HEA. But more importantly for me, I felt personally connected to the narrative and the individuals inside it, especially after reading the the acknowledgements and seeing pieces of my own life reflected in the story.