Ever since I was old enough to read on my own, I’ve been making terrible decisions regarding books and basic time management. I’m normally a fairly organized and responsible person. I file my taxes on time. My library books are never overdue. My homework was never late.
Add books to the mix, though, and suddenly I decide to do things that Future Elyse will seriously regret, hence my founding of The Bad Decisions Book Club.
Here’s a few examples of what it means to belong to this esteemed club:
I have to read four books for work in a week’s timespan, so naturally I ignore all those books and pick up something entirely different instead. Usually this book has been sitting in the dusty corners of my Kindle, a forgotten backlist title I bought on sale, but suddenly I have to read it RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.
Another example would be having my family come over for the holidays which necessitates cleaning and cooking and showering–but sitting down to read instead.
But most often it goes like this:
I decide to start a new book at 11:30 at night, just to read a few pages. At this point I’m in my denial phase of poor reading choices, but Future Elyse is waving at me through the time space continuum, giving me the finger, because she knows how this ends. She’s seen this before. It ends in bitter tears.
By 1:30 a.m. my neck hurts and my eyes are tired, and we’re now deeply into the negotiation phase of things. I will put the book down after this chapter, I can still totally go to work tomorrow if I skip a shower, brush my teeth in the car, wear the pants I had on yesterday and get a venti flat white from Starbucks. We can still make this happen.
Now it’s 3 a.m. and I know Future Elyse is gonna be REALLY MAD. Somewhere in my exhausted brain I’m trying to math but it doesn’t work out. There’s no point in even going to bed now, right? Three hours of sleep is somehow worse than no hours of sleep.
I start planning out how I’m going to survive the next day: I can finish the book, shower, brush my teeth at home like a normal person, and wear new pants. I will mainline espresso and Diet Coke all day, adding in Excedrin as needed.
By noon, I figure the nausea will kick in. That’s why I have Saltines in my desk. I can cancel my two afternoon meetings and if my staff ask me any questions I’ll just say “Sure,” and pray that covers it. If they stare at me I’ll follow it up with, “What do you think you should do?” so it looks like mentoring.
Now it’s 3:30 a.m. and I realize my plan is terrible and why the hell do I even do this, what is wrong with me. I go downstairs and cry into the cat for fifteen minutes which REALLY upsets the cat, quite frankly. Since I’m tired and overly emotional, I turn to my comfort activity–reading.
By 5:00 a.m. I’m contemplating calling into work with diarrhea. No one EVER questions diarrhea.
By 5:30 I’ve resigned myself to the fact that this is not the responsible thing to do.
6:00 a.m.: MOTHER FUCKER.
Inevitably I go to work having finished the book and generally feeling like shit. People do a double take when I walk by and ask if I’m anemic again. I give Past Elyse the finger.
Honestly, though, I know I’ll never learn my lesson and I’ll do it again.
What about you? Are you a member of The Bad Decisions Book Club? What reading choice do you totally (not) regret?
NB: Sarah has Bad Decisions Book Club stickers – the purple circles above with our tent of reading and shame. She’ll be giving out stickers at random to folks who comment until Friday 6 May (void where prohibited, must be over 18, etc etc), so don’t be shy about sharing your Bad Decisions Book Club shame!
NBx2: By request from PamG, there are Bad Decisions Book Club t-shirts to be had! You can choose a chest/pocket logo version or a large logo version.
NBx3! By further request: STICKERS for purchase!
Proud, lifelong, card carrying member. So many sleepless nights with sire eyes in the front row of class looking like I’m coming down after a three day coke bender.
I joined the Bad Decisions Book Club when I was in 6th grade and discovered reading in bed by flashlight. I spent almost the entire winter with a constant cold because I was so sleep-deprived that I was prey to every passing germ. I also got some truly awful grades for the first time. Later in life, my membership in the Club actually contributed to me losing my first job out of college; the boss didn’t have much of a sense of humor about my recurring inability to be at my desk at 9:00. (I’m a terrible night owl regardless, but…)
By the way, reading this post felt like reading someone narrating my life!
Um, yes, obviously. I’ve got some great historical non-fiction just lined up on my shelf (The Bully Pulpit, A Country of Vast Designs, plus the mothereffing Hamilton bio) and yet when I finish a book (romance) I think, “hmm. what do I feel like reading?” and then all of a sudden I’m checking out MULTIPLE new romances from the library on my Kindle and devouring them one by one without any thought for other reading (including stuff for my job!)
Like, that Hamilton bio? I now have two weeks in which to read it. When I started, I had six. … 😀
Happens ALL THE TIME. Only I don’t have a cat. Maybe I should get one to cry into.
This weekend I skim-read a 5-book series BACKWARDS rather than getting myself and the house ready to go on vacation next week – which is when I plan to read the same 5 book series going FORWARD. Because really – who needs to leave clean bathroom or mop the floor for the house sitter or shop for groceries for the kids? Nobody needed clean clothes more than I needed to know how the series ended, or how it got there. Hopefully I skimmed past enough details that the ending will still be satisfying.
I need a t shirt, not a sticker.
OH YES. I usually start a book earlier, maybe around 10:00, and THIS time I am going to stop after a few chapters and use a bookmark and read the rest tomorrow. Inevitably, when it’s time to stop for the night, things are just getting interesting and I don’t see how they’ll get resolved. I’ll read the next chapter and stop. One more chapter. Okay, one more… Oh, well, that was the end of the book and it’s 4 a.m. Whoops.
As a child, I was often caught under the covers with my book light reading way past bedtime. Now, it’s my husband saying “you should really put the book down and go to sleep”. Just one more chapter…
I do this exact thing way too often! Sometimes I even finish a book, then tell myself that I am just going to pick s new book to start next…then I am reading it as well. I can’t even recall how many times I crawl into bed just to turn around and get up. So glad we all have each other’s understanding. Lord knows no one else does!
I am a charter member of the Bad Decision Book Club. I inherited my membership from my mother. I find I am lucky if I only stay up until 2 am reading a BDB. But those books take me into daylight and birds chirping. I don’t even have the ability with a BDB to negotiate well with myself anymore. It starts at “I will just finish this chapter…” then it becomes “I will read until 2 am because it’s a round number and still technically the middle of the night.” Then I get caught up in the story and I look and it’s 4 am. WHAT?!!! I just looked and it was 1:30 am. How did time cheat me out of two and a half hours?! At that point I am in “Fuck it” mode and resign myself to feeling book hung over and short tempered and promise myself I will just go to bed early the next night. Yeah right. My husband doesn’t even blink when he lets the dogs out in the morning and me and my cat (cause one does need a partner in BDB crime)face plant into bed.
Umm. Last night I woke up at 3:30, after four hours of sleep and decided I simply must read a little more of the latest Julia Quinn. You know, just to help me nod off again. Disappeared into early Bridgertonland only to surface at 6:15, satisfied but sleepy. Not at the top of my game today, but that George Rokesby put such a smile on my face.
Charter member here. :waving:
It’s the worst with Kristen Ashley books. You know, the ones I’ve read 10 times each? I know those stories by heart but it’s 3 am and I’m not putting that sucker down until I get the hit of endorphins that floods my brain after *that* scene. Even if the scene is the epilogue. It’s an illness.
I polish my membership badge in this club every single day. One more chapter, just until I get through this scene, in ten minutes I’ll put it down… Yeah, yeah, yeah. I read until my eyes are burning and blurring, and until I can barely lift my head from too much tablet neck. Sleep? Ha! What’s sleep compared to whether the heroes will finally get their heads on straight and admit they screwed up?
Once, however, forgoing sleep for a good book helped me catch my teenager trying to sneak back into the house very, very late. He’s 19, so it wasn’t that big a deal, but the look on his face was hilarious. So sometimes these bad decisions can help others with their not-so-good decisions. Yep, that’s how I justify it.
Yuuup. I have a delightful habit of finishing a book right around bedtime, and then starting a new one “just to get it started,” and then it’s 2am. Worth it, though! Always worth it.
Oh, oh, oh. I’ve been a member of this club ALL MY LIFE. Except, y’know, in my case it’s more of looking at the pile of books I bought in my last visit to Half Price Books (WHY do I go there? WHY?) and then looking at the Nora Roberts or Jennifer Crusie or Mary Balogh I’ve already read a gazillion times, and starting it all over again.
And pfft, how long could one more chapter really take? 30 seconds, right? Sigh.
To me there is nothing like finding a book that does this to me and I don’t really regret it because it was just that good
However I do make bad book decisions that I do actually regret. There are certain authors whose work never clicks with me. It is not that their work is bad it just isn’t for me. However a blurb of their newest book will sound so intriguing that it will make me think that this time it will be different. It very rarely is different, usually I end up mad at past me because I knew better.
OH GOD YES
I’ve recently had to ban myself from reading anything BUT non-fiction before bed because otherwise I’m up until 2 am reading and there’s no way I’ll graduate on time if I keep doing that.
And then the weekend comes…
And then it’s 1 am and I’m on my second book after finishing three fanfics and DEAR GOD I SHOULD PROBABLY SLEEP SOON
I did this last night, after an order of Game of Thrones and The Night Manager, because then it made TOTAL sense to put a dent in Queen of Shadows.
Rational me: Oooh, this book is bad.
Irrational me: I wonder if this author gets any better? I should buy another one, you know, just to be sure.
Rational me: God, this author can’t write his/her way out of a paper bag! Why am I still reading this?
Irrational me: Oh, here’s a witty line. Author must be getting better. I’d better buy the next one.
Rational me (three books and a credit card bill later): Damn it!
I could have written this article, that’s how close it is to my behavior. The only difference is that I’m a freelancer so I sleep the whole next day away and end up working to meet my deadlines like some crazed maniac the next day.
Dear sweet friends! I am SO SO HAPPY to have found you at last! Ava (#29) my husband says the same thing! My children groan as I walk around with my phone ignoring their frequent requests for food. (they are perfectly capable teenagers now) I used to drag a book around with me when I was little and say”read, read, read!” clearly I haven’t changed a bit. Jen (#25) I too find a detox of non fiction and a few good nights sleep sets things right again for a new binge on a romance. I am so happy to know I am not alone in my denial and serious addiction to the written word. Thank you! Thank you!
I see we are legion 🙂
With me it’s likeliest to happen with ebooks because the Kindle is just so damn portable. I get stuck into a novel, traipse around the house with it, take it with me into the bathroom for a leisurely bathtub read. Brush my teeth while reading. Ooh, this is good. Gosh, look at the time – OK, just to the end of this chapter. Well, maybe one more chapter couldn’t hurt. One more chapter… one more chapter… {record skip} Eep!
Thank goodness I am not alone in this – so many books, so many bad decisions and so little time.
I’ve read on my iPad/iPhone at night in the dark even though I have an eink reader and then realize I can’t get to sleep ‘cuz of the blue light – all because I was lazy and didn’t want to get up walk 3 steps to get my Kobo.
My personal recent bad decision… reading on my phone surreptitiously at my desk at work. I’m surprised no one has noticed yet. Oh Overdrive, Kobo, Kindle apps how you tempt me so :). I will even stay up late to read a book I really dislike – I mean it has to get better, right?
Yup.
So last night this idiot (pointing at myself) thinks, “I’ll just start this Lisa Kleypas book, its only 11:30.” I knew what I was doing, but I still did it. Luckily I was able to finish it around 2ish, but yeah I’m moving slow this morning.
*Raises hand* I tried to start a book at midnight last night because suddenly I needed it right then and there. My husband had to talk me down like I was holding hostages in a bank to get the Kindle away and convince me that sleep was good for me.
I have on more than one occasion started a book at 1:30 or later. I’m a CRAZY FAST reader, so that usually means I’ll be done at 3:30, but still, how is that an acceptable time, self? What did you think was going to happen if you started a new book? 1:30 is a perfectly respectable time to go to bed, it’s not like it was 8 or something.
I blame my mother. last time I was living at home, we would eat dinner together at the table every night, with each of us reading our book.
Definitely a member of the club! It’s midnight and my Kindle says I’m 80% through the book–hey, keep going until the end, you’re practically done.
Biggest mistake–getting the Kindle app on my phone. I’ll just read this at my desk while I’m eating lunch. Two hours later–crap, better get back to work. Also, I may or may not have accidentally read an entire book once on what turned out to be a very long “lunch break.” In my defense, it was one of the Tessa Dare castle books.
I’m not sure if this is a bad book decision on my part or my son’s, but he liked to listen to audiobooks when he went to bed. (I used to read to him, but then he discovered audiobooks and decided they were better.) So when he was about 8 he was listening to the audiobook of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. I went in his room to shut off the CD player and it was at the part with the inferi in the lake. To this day he is terrified of the part of that book and movie about the “lake zombies.” Oops.
This post is a blessing. I’m an academic librarian and I personally make bad decisions about books that I try to discourage in my students. “Oh, just one more chapter…” “I HAVE TO KNOW HOW THIS ENDS IMMEDIATELY.” “Oh sure, I’ll read the 8 books I have checked out… but I wanna read this new one now.” “I have work tomorrow, but I have this book in my hands now… so obviously I need to forego sleep to finish this.” “I have a hundred books I haven’t read on my bookshelf, but obviously I need these ten as well.” “I have to read this book… I’ll put it off until the week of. I can read 600 pages in two days, right?”
When I read this post, all I could think was, “I have found my people and they do crazy, sometimes irresponsible, things related to reading, too!”
Sign me up. Just before Christmas I received the edits for my debut novella. I was slowly working my way through the when I walked past the paper back version of Me Before You in the bookstore that had come out in time for Christmas gifting. (Because nothing says I love you like ugly crying) I bought it and read it during a particularly bad bout of insomnia — reading by minibooklight — attempting to keep my silent sobs to a minimum so I didn’t wake up my husband and have to explain why I was reading and crying instead of editing on deadline.
This is so familiar! Unfortunately I am one of those people that if I don’t get at least 6 hours of sleep I become physically ill. So I calculate exactly hoe late I can stay up to the minute and try to read as fast as I can.
I always start books at night because I have no responsibilities at that time of day except for sleeping (which can be put off or helped by the reading).
I am a fairly fast reader so if I start early enough, like 8pm. I can finish some novels by 1am, and that is enough time to sleep for me.
But on the occasions I can’t finish it, I will push it. If that fails, I will give up and sleep. And then try to read “just a little” in the morning. Morning is when I should be doing other things. Like preparing for work, eating, showering etc. But I will push and push and push it off until I am almost late for work.
Lesson: Don’t start reading in the morning.
How long have I been a member of this club? I think since the day I learned to read. As a child, I constantly had problems with my mother wanting me to do housework instead of reading. This really bothered me because my brother didn’t have to do any housework. He’d be out playing with his friends and I’d be sitting quietly reading. But mom always considered reading a waste of time. Please don’t faint. Tony’s time was used well, he was playing outside. My choices were poor: sit inside and read. According to mom. this was unhealthy. One time I was so incensed when her back was turned, I grabbed my book, hopped onto my bike and rode to a park mom did not know about. I stayed there until I finished my book and then went home in time for dinner.
So recent bad decisions I have made have been staying up all night reading books in a series. I’d finish one, buy the next for my kindle. Read that, buy the next and the before I knew dawn was cracking.
I did that with Terry Goodkind’s series, the first of which is The Wizard’s First Rule. These are big fat books so not only were they an all night commitment, they were also an all day commitment. The only thing that saved me from going days without sleep was that they were library books and I had to wait for the library to send me the next volume.
Ditto Harry Potter. I would pre-order, the book would arrive on release day, I’d sit and devour it. So much for anything else that might be going on in my life or the world.
When I was in elementary school I used to walk to school and back twice a day (we got to go home for lunch). I used to do this and read at the same time. I only walked into a phone pole once. I also used to read during “morning talks” in fifth and sixth grade. These were oral reports where the student had to pick a topic, do research and an outline, and then present the information to the class. You can imagine the level of public speaking talent involved. I just needed to read instead. My teacher tried to catch me out and make me put away my book (Very embarassing!), but since I usually knew what was going on, she finally gave up.
Lifetime member. And, like others have mentioned, it only got worse after the birth of my child–nighttime nursing meant SO MANY MORE chapters.
I had a practice AP exam on the Mayor of Casterbridge in high school. I stayed up until 4 a.m. the night before reading a historical romance that involved the battle of Culloden (I want to say it was by Nora Roberts). I had nothing to say about Hardy, so I wrote a very long, very farfetched essay on “otherness” in the book, with reference to Culloden. I found quotes that I used to suggest that several English characters were Scottish. It was totally nonsensical. I forgave Nora for it, but I’ve never quite forgiven Thomas Hardy.
The struggle is so real! I am definitely in this club!
I joined the Bad Decisions Book Club while on a family vacation when I was eight or nine years old. We were camping and went into town for supplies. While at a general store, I talked my mother into buying me a copy of Black Beauty because I had read all of the books I had brought with me. I started reading my new book (horsies!) in the car and became horribly car sick. To this day, I can’t read in a moving vehicle.
I continue making Bad Decisions when I decide to read just a little bit more before getting ready for work in the morning. I work from home, so I’m not really late … I simply start, oh, five to 30 minutes later than I should. Bedhead and jammies for work are not an option as I may be asked to join a video conference at any time. Happened once and won’t make that mistake again!
Guilty!
I try very hard not to start a new book when I go to bed. It’s easier (usually/generally/maybe) to put down a book that I already know. Which, of course, explains why I started a new book at 9:30pm last night and finished it at about 1:00am this morning.
I doubt I’ll change anytime soon.
Bad decisions regarding books…I have two major ones. Number one, I don’t get to read at home a whole lot as I have two young kids. So, I find myself reading at work…not during lunch or breaks, when I’m supposed to be actually working! Number two, if I like the first book in a series, I feel obligated to buy and read every book thereafter, even if the series goes downhill and loses my interest! I feel like the characters and I have formed a relationship and that I have to stick with them, even when their lives become unrealistic and overly dramatic!
OH!! I forgot a life-changing moment that was a result of reading. One day Sr Stella Maria told us we were going to have a free reading period the next day and to bring in a book. I brought in Peter Pan and Wendy, which I was reading for the first time. I opened my book and I read, Next thing I knew, Sister had grabbed the book and accused me of disobedience because I did not put the book down when she order the class to close our books and stop reading. I never heard her, I was so deep into the story.
Then Sister made me put the book on the windowsill before making me stand in the corner. I was consumed with anxiety for the book because the window was open, we were on the third floor and it was a LIBRARY book, which I had been taught to revere as sacred and nothing bad was ever supposed to happen to a library book. I was also consumed with shame because I was a very good little girl and had never been punished ever in school. I believed no one would ever speak to me again because I was so naughty.
After an interminable time (probably really only five minutes) I was allowed out fo the corner, allowed to rescue the book from the perils of the windowsill and resume my seat. You can be sure I stowed that precious volume in my desk where it was nice and safe.