Elyse Watches The Bachelorette–S19 E9: Overnight Dates

I didn’t recap last week’s episode for 2 reasons:

1. It was the Men Tell All episode which is a clip show with a lot of shouting over each other

(Ed. note: yuck.)

and 2. I had COVID brain.

(Ed. note: also yuck. Been there.)

Despite her sassiness, Pudding was a good nurse and made sure we took big naps with her each day.

I asked if she was going to watch this episode and she said “Ugh, I’m going back to bed.”

Rachel and Gabby meet up in Mexico. It’s Fantasy Suites weeks.

Rachel says she’s dreading the week because of how things went down with Clayton last season. He slept with both of them and said he was in love with both of them, plus Susie who didn’t sleep with him. She also says she’s falling in love with Aven.

Gabby says she told Erich she was falling in love with him because “it’s true.”

Pudding: As opposed to it being a lie?

The first date is between Gabby and Erich. They go swimming in a cenote.

Gabby’s bikini has a thong back and ABC blurs it out.

Pudding: Ass cheeks are the least offensive part of this show.

During the dinner they aren’t allowed to eat, Erich tells Gabby he’s in love with her.

Gabby says she feels weightless. Girl, that’s because they don’t let you eat on this show.

Then they open the creepy card inviting them to spend the night together. Dale’s handwriting is the same as Chris Harrison’s BTW.

The next morning they make breakfast together. Gabby tells the camera she’s in love with him, but she doesn’t tell Erich this.

Next up is Aven and Rachel’s date. They go on a yacht and drink champagne in the sun.

Next up Dale checks in with Tino. Tino says Rachel thought his dad didn’t like her (he didn’t) and that it’s horrible to think about. Then he says he doesn’t like splitting time with other guys, but he’s sure that Rachel is “the future Mrs. Forever for me.”

During dinner Rachel asks Aven if he thinks he can get engaged in two weeks and he says yes.

Rachel tells him on Clayton’s season the word “love” was thrown around carelessly and she didn’t want to say anything unless she really meant it. Then she tells him she’s falling in love with him. They  head up to the Fantasy Suite.

I feel like the Fantasy Suites used to be super elaborate but now they’re just nice hotel rooms.

The next day is her date with Tino. They ride horses because we haven’t used up the horse budget yet. Tino’s horse did not agree to this and is not cooperating. Then they go visit a cenote too.

Tino tells the camera he thinks Rachel is nervous and he worries it’s about how his family reacted to her. Rachel meanwhile wonders if he could get engaged without the support of his family.

During dinner, Rachel admits that she felt especially that his dad didn’t like her and she isn’t sure if Tino can move forward now. She tells him that the last thing his dad told her was “Well, I’m not going to disown him if he gets engaged, I just can’t accept it.”

Tino says his dad doesn’t get him and will have to get on board with their relationship because he’s in love with Rachel. Rachel says she loves him too.

Pudding: Holidays are going to be awkward…

Then they go to the Fantasy Suite.

The following day is Gabby’s date with Johnny. They got on a sail boat. Johnny says he used to have a Hobie Cat.

“Oh, me too,” Gabby says. “Isn’t that like a hamster?”

Pudding: Mmmm, hamsters.

Later they drink champagne on the beach.

Gabby tells Johnny she’s at a place where she’s ready to be engaged.

“It’s a hard thing to think about it. It’s such a quick process, and I don’t know,” he says. “The end result scares me.”

She asks him if he’s ready to be engaged. “That’s a hard thing to think about. That’s like a battle in my head,” he says. He adds, “I can see myself falling in love with you.”

Gabby goes for a walk. She says she’s asked to be loved her whole life, so his response to her hurts.

Pudding: Tell him to get lost and then eat your dinner and his.

Then Johnny says, “You’re exactly the person I’d want to fall in love with, but I just don’t know if I can get to engagement.”

DUDE.

(Ed. note: are there people who go on this show without any understanding how this show works? This seems to happen a lot.) 

Gabby tells him they want two different things and leaves him sitting on his little sadness blanket.

“My feelings are numb. I don’t know how to feel right now,” Johnny says.

Pudding: You don’t know how to feel AT ALL.

As Gabby walks away, he says, “There goes my lady.”

Gross.

Meanwhile Jason tells Dale that he’s not in love with Gabby yet and doesn’t know if he can get engaged.

Later Gabby is writing in her journal when there’s a knock on her door. Someone leaves a note asking to meet her on a bridge. Erich is waiting for her and they make out. He tells her he’s struggling with her having overnight dates with the other guys. Gabby starts crying and says they already talked about this privately in Fantasy Suites.

She tells the camera that he told her felt like she was cheating, and she feels like he’s putting unfair pressure on her or testing her.

“I hope this doesn’t end up in a big fat dumpster fire,” she says.

Pudding: Spoiler alert…

She leaves Erich on the bridge alone.

We get a To Be Continued. That’s it. Are you watching?