Carmilla is an early vampire novel (it heavily influenced Dracula, which was written twenty-six years later). More specifically, it is Victorian Lesbian Vampire Erotica. People who think the Victorians were prudes clearly haven’t read Carmilla, in which a lesbian vampire seduces her victim night after night and day after day with “languid” movements and many “caresses.” To be honest, I pretty much just summed up the plot for you in the paragraph above. The narrator, Laura, is … Continue reading Carmilla by Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu →
Redheadedgirl and Amanda saw Crimson Peak, as did I (but on the other side of the country). For RHG and I, Crimson Peak is pure crack. It has gothic romance. It has stunning costumes. It has my imaginary movie star boyfriend, Tom Hiddelston, making puppy eyes at everything that moves, and Jessica Chastain looking daggers at everyone and it’s basically everything we love in life. It’s hard to describe the plot without getting into spoilers, … Continue reading Movie Review: Crimson Peak →
H.P. Lovecraft was a creepy dude who wrote creepy stories that made a permanent mark on horror and pop culture. His most famous legacy is a series of stories that makes up the Cthulhu Mythos. In Lovecraft’s world, the universe is populated with bizarre and all-powerful beings (one of which is Cthulhu) who regard us as more insignificant than ants. Heroes in Lovecraft who learn of our true place in the universe almost always go … Continue reading She Walks in Shadows ed. by Silvia Moreno-Garcia and Paula R. Stiles →
Alice isn’t your grandmother’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Hell, I don’t even know if it’s my version of it either. It’s dark, disturbing, both a retelling and a continuation of the classic, and I’m issuing all the trigger warnings. The book is fraught with violence, including both physical and sexual violence against women. So if those things are difficult for you to read about, especially in relation to a much-loved story from your childhood, I … Continue reading Alice by Christina Henry →
When I saw a book called Alice in Zombieland on a table at the RT Booklovers Convention I did such a rapid double take that I still have whiplash. That cover might just as well have been subtitled “A book specifically written to make CarrieS salivate with excitement.” I had high expectations, but the book was disappointing on many levels – unconvincing characters, unconvincing world-building, a lack of Alice in Wonderland elements (misleading titles drive … Continue reading Alice in Zombieland by Gena Showalter →
I hadn’t intended to review Chapelwood for Smart Bitches, but as soon as I told my fellow Bitches that I was reading a book in which Lizzie Borden fights Lovecraftian monsters with an axe, something really alarming happened. Their eyes got really big and they started drooling and tentacles sprang forth and reached out towards the book that was inconveniently located in my hands, and they gibbered, “GIMMIEGIMMIEGIMMIE.” So clearly there’s some overlap between people … Continue reading Chapelwood by Cherie Priest →
It’s difficult to identify what’s more bothersome about the first chapters of Grey. I was really curious about it because the only parts of Fifty Shades that I liked were Christian’s email messages to Ana. The rest of it was miserable reading for me because I didn’t like being in Ana’s head any more than I liked being in Bella’s. But maybe Christian would be more interesting. Well, if “interesting” is a cousin to “terrifying,” “horrible,” … Continue reading Top 13 Terrible Lines from Chapters 1 & 2 of Grey by EL James →
A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night is being marketed as “The first Iranian Vampire Western.” It has elements of film noir, Western, horror, and romance. It’s finally available on iTunes and will be available on DVD April 21. I adored this movie – it’s a quirky romance as well as a subversive feminist horror movie with minimal gore but lots of suspense and an amazing amount of dry humor. The plot is pretty simple. A … Continue reading A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night →
Sometimes you need to laugh so hard you pee a little. I’ve been evangelizing about the Johannes Cabal series by Jonathan L. Howard to all my friends for awhile now. Howard does for Gothic romance and steampunk what Pratchett did for epic fantasy. I’m just finishing up the fourth book, The Brothers Cabal, now and I’ve been pee-laughing while I read (I might need to do some kegels). Johannes Cabal is a necromancer of some … Continue reading Johannes Cabal the Necromancer by Jonathan L. Howard →
The Darkest Part of the Forest, by Holly Black, is a fantasy YA with romance elements. I’m a huge Holly Black fan – she’s been a major force in urban fantasy and her books are always gorgeous to read. This book had some problems, and the romance is pretty tacked on, but it’s excellent in terms of plot and dark fantasy atmosphere. Here’s the plot as described by the publisher: Hazel lives with her brother, … Continue reading The Darkest Part of the Forest by Holly Black →
Speakeasy Dead is being marketed as a romantic comedy. It has all the ingredients to be a great screwball 1920’s comedy, including bootleggers, movie stars, fabulous clothes, and zombies. Unfortunately, the characters aren’t very sympathetic or interesting, and the romance is almost non-existent. It’s a fairly entertaining light read, but not terribly engrossing and certainly not romantic. Screwball comedies thrive on complication, and one thing this book does very well is create a classic plot … Continue reading Speakeasy Dead by Vicky Loebel →
