Next week I’m going to be recording a very fun podcast episode with royal commentator and art historian Amanda Matta. You might know her as @matta_of_fact from TT, or IG, or her podcast “Off with their Headlines,” or her OTHER podcast “Art of History.”
Inspired by her “Art of History” podcast, I wanted to talk with Amanda about what the old school covers communicate from an art history perspective.
For example: The Beloved One, a favorite of Candy’s.
Yes, the castle/tower/rock formation/gazebo is phallic, but what else is going on? Other than the incipient, uh, honking of the bobo.
So, here’s my request. Obviously I have a few on file already, but I’d love to know: what is YOUR favorite most bonkers, off the wall, truly bizarre old skool romance cover?
For example, the original art for The Lion and the Lark hangs in my office:
There’s a Very Erect Folly in the background, but that didn’t make the cover. What a shame.
Or then there’s The Raider, and the hair.
I’m pretty sure Rumor Has It by Cindi Myers was submitted for the AAR Cover Contest one year. And I STILL haven’t figured out what is happening on this cover.
I’ve never understood why these two were determined to visit Bhone Towne on jagged rocks:
There?! You’re doing the deed right there?
Or, the champion of covers:
She’s my avatar in a bunch of different places.
Truly incredible – but I KNOW there are even weirder ones. Which ones should I include?
I may not be able to feature all of them, but I’ll be querying Amanda about as many as I can (poor Amanda).
Please feel welcome to post the image in the comments, or just the title. I’m enabling images for a bit in the comments but only one image per comment (the spam otherwise is mindblowing).
Rumor Has It looks like he’s got his head between her legs to me. I’m not sure about the flexibility required for her hand to also be on his back, unless there’s another person in the back of the car with them. What exactly did those rumors say? Can we make it even more scandalous?
I must be weird because most of those look fine to me, except Castles in the Air. That, my friend, is an example of AI fingers before AI as we know it existed.
Having pictures enabled doesn’t actually enable me, lol, I remain intimidated by the html tags we’ve always (theoretically) been able to use.
I’m a big fan of Martin’s Barbara Cartland covers. I can’t think of any one as specifically the best of them, I just like his art, but if you go looking maybe bonus points for one with horses and/or kilts? There’s a fast, loose but elegant quality to the line work that really grabs me. It’s sketchy (as in like a sketch not like dubious) and almost, dare I say, cartoonish – lifelong cartoon fan but I hate the contemporary cartoon covers. Cartoonish in the best way. I think he must have worked in fashion, the clothes are always tremendous fun.
Geer also did covers like that, I think, where it feels like a drawing more than a painting, and has this accompanying sense of immediacy, although I never liked him as well. Can I think of a specific title to illustrate this illustrative quality? I cannot. He might be why I first read DuMarier? Yes! Frenchman’s Creek. Although The King’s General is also really something, the internet has shown me.
But apparently people are more interested in paintings than drawings (it’s not just the prices that makes me think this, it’s the crowds at respective exhibits). And romance covers moved towards realism and even hyper realism which was never my jam, even if I never prefer a watercolor approach in the writing. McGinnis did some of my favorites of that clinch style that became the defining image of a romance novel – the Joanna Lindsey one with the “best seller” sticker as a fig leaf is a classic. She got some really great covers. His pulp novel work (which has more of the drawing lines visible, and everyone looks tougher) is my favorite of his stuff.
Back in the 80s or 90s I feel like Zebra had the most bonkers covers, or possibly just storylines? I cannot remember the name or plot of a single one. I just remember thinking they were irresistibly terrible, and I gobbled them like candy. I also read several Beatrice Small books, which had more to do with Duillo than Small. Duillo always gave such good hair. It’s more incandescent than merely lustrous. Her pulp covers were my favorites, though.
I love this particular cover for “Heart of the Falcon” by Suzanne Robinson. It’s harder to find than the bland reprint cover, so I wish I’d kept my copy when I had it.
I’ve been considering this one of the ultimate romance covers: “The Hawk and the Dove” by Virginia Henley, painted by Sharon Spiak. Everything about it is just classic Old Skool historical, right down to the cover copy on the back!
And, of course, the orange and fuchsia of the OG “Lord of Scoundrels” cover, which I absolutely love. I once asked Ms. Chase what happened to the OG painting, and she didn’t know.
Tender is the Storm obvs
And this delightful Last Jedi homage as well
Cartland + baby lions + cheetahs? Oh my
Bear by Marian Engel
Can’t get it to stick, but a Google image search should do the trick.
Am I weird? I love these covers. Tender Is The Storm is hawt AF.
You’re not weird! What woman hasn’t wanted to have her sternum rigorously plundered?
Those were the days. Loved those covers and the colouration.
This was a great resource but seems to have fallen by the wayside
https://sweetsavageflame.com/
Gill
Those were the days. Loved those covers and the colouration.
This was a great resource but seems to have fallen by the wayside
https://sweetsavageflame.com/
Gill
@stylinsonbirds I just re-read my mom’s copy of that one. Wow I’d forgotten how bad it was
> I’ve never understood why these two were determined to visit Bhone Towne on jagged rocks
They appear to be giants doing it on mountains, which seems reasonable to me.
> the original art for The Lion and the Lark hangs in my office
Then it’s not “off the wall”! *runs away*
> I’ve never understood why these two were determined to visit Bhone Towne on jagged rocks
They appear to be giants doing it on mountains, which seems reasonable to me.
> the original art for The Lion and the Lark hangs in my office
Then it’s not “off the wall”! *runs away*
> I’ve never understood why these two were determined to visit Bhone Towne on jagged rocks
They appear to be giants doing it on mountains, which seems reasonable to me.
> the original art for The Lion and the Lark hangs in my office
Then it’s not “off the wall”! *runs away*
> I’ve never understood why these two were determined to visit Bhone Towne on jagged rocks
They appear to be giants doing it on mountains, which seems reasonable to me.
> the original art for The Lion and the Lark hangs in my office
Then it’s not “off the wall”! *runs away*
Johanna Lindsey had some classics. I’ve always been partial to the original *Gentle Rogue* (which my mom had in hardback and I sneaked on days I was home sick): https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/891812.Gentle_Rogue
Mom is also a big fan of Bertrice Small, and some of her books were quite colorful:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1800969.Enchantress_Mine
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1088812.A_Moment_in_Time
Persistence is my middle name.
Bear by Marian Engels
Sorry for the duplicates! Now I know not to keep trying when the site seems broken.
Our poor WP database is having A Time. I’m going to pause the images-in-the-comments feature and see if that helps. However! If you have covers to submit, please drop the title/author here, or email them to me! Thank you and my apologies.
For Rumor Has It, isn’t that a back seat window? Is she in the trunk? I don’t remember old-school hatchbacks or station wagons having windows like that for the back seat… I’m so confused…
Don’t think I have a favourite – yet – as I didn’t read old skool back in the day and my library doesn’t have them (might have to check out some second-hand shops!). But the artwork is certainly gorgeous and was clearly created by very talented people. Modern cartoony illustrated covers just can’t hold a candle to them, even if what’s inside the covers is better.