This Rec League comes from Frances. Thanks, Frances!
I am wondering if anyone can recommend romances or not-depressing books where a main character has vaginismus? I’ve been working through vaginismus with my ob-gyn and a physical therapist (and very thoughtful and supportive partner) with the goal of penetration. While it doesn’t bother me to read books where penetration is easy and straightforward and there are a lot of non-penetrative sex scenes out there, I do wish once in a while I could read a sex scene where someone has vaginismus that is not ultimately about trauma. I’m specifically looking for representation in romance novels but at this point, any fiction that isn’t depressing (this is obviously subjective but I can’t think of a better way to put it) is welcome.
Sarah: Not a romance and not a series I have read but Adam has and liked it: The Blood Mirror, ( A | BN | K ) the fourth book of the Lightbringer series by Brent Weeks, features a character struggling with vaginismus.
The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes by Cat Sebastian I have read, and while it isn’t specified, the heroine has a lot of difficulty and trauma regarding penetrative sex, and I interpreted that as along the same lines as vaginismus.
And there’s a harlequin, too, by Lucy Monroe. She talked about it when it released, Blackmailed into Marriage. ( A | BN | K )
Which books would you recommend? Let us know below!
There were a number of suggestions of books featuring characters with vaginismus in the comments on this podcast episode: https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/podcast/213-books-made-romance-readers-super-honest-brave-sharing-time/
I feel like there was another podcast episode where an interviewee also talked about vaginismus, but my initial googling didn’t turn it up.
Also, the first season (I believe) of Sex Education features a character, Lily, with vaginismus.
I tried to comment earlier but it hasn’t come through – posting again in case it was a technical fluke, but apologies if I end up double-posting!
In Lucy Parker’s The Austen Playbook, I don’t recall a specific diagnosis of vaginismus, but at one point the heroine warns the hero that sometimes they won’t be able to have penetrative sex due to her pelvic pain issues, and he gets it and is totally supportive – and they have plenty of fun in other ways!
The Awkward Path to Getting Lucky by Summer Heacock features a cupcake bakery owner with vaginismus, which is addressed very directly.
One of the MCs in my F/F-with-a-twist romance novella ILLUSION experiences vaginismus (along with other GYN issues). It’s free at Prolific Works. 🙂 Author Alexandra Caluen – claims.prolificworks.com/free/zMb2FB2X
I’m so excited to see this rec league. I’ve never read a romance novel with a character with vaginismus, and over the past year I have started to notice how easily characters have penetrative sex, and to want to read something different. And, I’ve been wondering why I write my characters this way when it hasn’t been my reality.
It’s gotten me thinking about the idea that a certain kind of sex is “the main event” and wanting to push back on that idea. So in Nanowrimo last year, I drafted a story with a character with vaginismus. I felt so anxious about doing it but really wanted to, and once I had it on paper it felt okay. Now I feel even more glad I wrote it. (The book is fifth in a series and won’t be out until 2025.)
Thank you Frances for bringing this up. I’m excited to know there are other books like this and going to look up all the recs!
The 2011 anthology MEN UNDRESSED: WOMEN WRITERS AND THE MALE SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (edited by Stacy Berlein) had exactly one story I loved: Kristin Thiel’s “Patient.” It’s a nonlinear tale of how a woman and her partner navigate her vaginismus, told mostly through his eyes. I was surprised at how sexy it was, mostly because their communication is so open and they seem to have a hot relationship dynamic that doesn’t rely on intercourse (or even sexual activity in general). There is some ambiguity about whether or not her symptoms resolve (which may be a good or bad thing depending how you feel), but the whole thing feels very realistic and positive. Thiel talks about the story here:
https://thenervousbreakdown.com/gfrangello/2011/11/the-six-question-sex-interview-men-undressed-edition-kristin-thiel/
There’s an old Edith Layton book… maybe Love in disguise… that has a heroine with this kind of issue. It’s quite an old book, so a surprising topic in its day and age, but due to the publication date ymmv. But the issue is a significant sub plot of the book. If it’s not Love in Disguise, it’s one of the other books of the same series.
There is an old HP called Blackmailed Into Marriage by Lucy Monroe where the heroine has vaginismus. It’s also the usual HP crazy plot with blackmail, an MOC and a plot muppet. But the H and h deal with her condition in a reasonable way, seeking medical advice, and not the magic peen cure.
Jennifer Greene wrote HEAT WAVE, 1990, Silhouette Desire. The heroine has a medical issue that makes penetration uncomfortable; the hero is supportive, and it is resolved medically.
@Karen OMG this won the web today:”. . .It’s also the usual HP crazy plot with blackmail, an MOC and a plot muppet.”
Kind of late to the party, but Smoke Signals by Catherine Gayle has this as a major part of the plot. Pro hockey player marries former porn actress to help her with a green card.