Cover Snark: Best of 2024

NB: This week, we’re taking a look back at some of our favorite and our most popular pieces of writing this year. We’ve got a week of best-of posts to share, with reviews, cover snark, and more. We hope you enjoy revisiting our archives, and most of all, we wish you and yours a wonderful holiday and a happy new year – with all the very best of reading.

Say hello to the top five Cover Snark posts of 2024! These are the most viewed Snark posts from last December to now! It’s such a joy to put these together and I hope you all get as much joy from reading them.

I will note that we switched heart plugins this year. For now, best comments are now up to my own discretion and I am drunk on power.

Let’s count them down!

 

A Shift in Fate by Maddox Grey. A blue smoky cover, with a pale snack curled up. However, the color of the snake makes it looks like a flaccid penis. Curled within the snake are green gems.5. Poor Vincent (August 26)

This Snark delivered a heavy dose of nostalgia for the Beauty and the Beast TV series. Plus, there was a suspicious (and very phallic) looking snake on another cover.

Best reader comment is from EC Spurlock:

You can tell I was really ready for my lunch break when I opened this because at first I thought that first one was some sort of hoagie with way too much lettuce, and then I looked over to the left…

 

 

All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles by Chloe Archer. A brunette man is holding a gray cat. The cats eyes are big and yellow and it looks horrified. A pink, illustrated tentacle with a Santa hat emerges from the bottom of the cover.4. Scared Cats & Celebrity Look-A-Likes (January 29)

There’s a cover with a cartoon tentacle and a cat who does not look like he consented to being on such a cover. In fact, he looks downright afraid to be here! Don’t worry, we have notified Sarah McLachlan.

Best reader comment is from Randall M.:

In addition to being concerned for the cat, I notice that the upper left corner of that book has a pink octopus-shape with the words, “Tinsel & Tentacles”, implying that this book doesn’t say all there is to say on the subject of cephalopod yuletides. Frankly, that scares me more than any number of wolf shifters.

 

Zerberu by Athena Storm. A shirtless man in space, but it looks like his skin is made out of deli meat, just a very bright red with lots of texture.3. Hot Groot (February 26)

There’s nothing like a cover model who appears to be made out of deli meat. Bonus points for him just hanging out in space.

Best reader comment is from Molly:

Along with everything else lizard lunch guy made me think of, I kept reading Zerbert rather than Zerberu. Which is somehow perfect, since a zerbert is the sound you make when you blow a raspberry on someone’s skin.

 

 

Bad at Being Good by A.L. Morrow. A man with bleach blond hair in a tight, white long sleeve shirt, but it appears he got distracted putting it on because it only goes to about his nipples.2. Once Again, Shirts Are Too Complicated (February 12)

I would be remiss if I didn’t the absolute beautiful dinosaur romance cover in this batch. However, several commenters insisted that this particular cover did not deserve a Snark. It was a work of art!

Best reader comment is from MelMc:

The eyes on Mr. Goop suggest that he doesn’t know how to do clothes because the goop is in his skull. I’d believe this as the cover for a zombie novel.

 

 

By Cold Moon's Night by Amanda Meuwissen. Two men - one with light skin and red hair and another with tan skin and black hair - are smoldering at the reader. They're outside of a bar on a snowy night. Their hair is impeccably gelled.1. Faceless Horrors (April 29)

I’m not going to lie, things start off pretty rough in this one. Somewhere in the middle of the selection, we’re all a little confused and then end with cringe and nostalgia.

Best reader comment is from the DiscoDollyDeb:

Those guys on the cover of BY COLD MOON’S LIGHT (especially the one in the back) could easily be members of 1980s synth-pop band. I’m kinda getting Style Council/Thompson Twins vibes.

 

 

And that’s our top five! What do you think? Did you have any Cover Snark favorites this year?

Add Your Comment →

  1. -m- says:

    So… I just googled ‘Bad at Being Goop’ and couldn’t find the book. Imagine my surprise when I realized it’s actually called ‘Bad at Being Good’! Clearly, this proves the cover deserves a spot in this year’s best-of list.

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