Welcome back to Cover Snark!
From Wait, What?: I’m not sure what is happening in this cover! She looks like she’s having a…moment…He looks totally annoyed, bro, and they both look like escapees from Saved by the Bell.
Sarah: They are from a 1994 JC Penney’s catalog, right? That’s where that image is from?
Elyse: I had that outfit in 5th grade.
Sneezy: The circle of life, eh? I wonder which of them is the ghost though. They both look oddly pasted on.
Kiki: This title and this cover feel so deeply sinister.
Maybe it’s just me?? I just..what’s gonna happen to that baby???
Amanda: That baby is definitely an arsonist.
Tara: For sure. The flame is coming out of their tiny fist!
Sarah: They better answer that baby’s cries within minutes, I think.
Sneezy: Aaah babies. Projectile vomiting, pooping, or shooting flames. Maybe even all at once.
From Reader Sarah: I feel a little guilty about submitting this cover because I’ve read the first book in the series and liked it. And the FMC here is a romance audiobook narrator. But I’m so distracted by this cover! One, burns! Mini tree twinkly Christmas lights can heat up hot and fast.
Two, is his chest imploding inward like a black hole to a demonic realm?
Sarah: OW. ow ow OW. Ow, take the pictu-OW -picture already.
Amanda: Also, Posey is not what I originally read.
Sarah: Oh my gosh you’re right.
Sneezy: Is this a kink or is this a poor decision?
From Elizabeth S: “I found my nipple…..?”
Sarah: He did! But he should put the gun down if it’s itchy. That way leads to disaster.
Amanda: I feel like he’s forcing us to look, given the gun.
Sarah: Maybe he dropped a bullet down his tank top?
Sneezy: Maybe he’s checking if the tank top is rippable ahead of time.
In all seriousness, the Stay Baby Stay title and the gun do NOT give me romantic feelings. That’s just disturbing. Run, baby, run,
Those lights in the Ring Around the Posey cover look like the unbearably painful nerves in the and for a neuropathy remedy. If that’s what the Hero has, no wonder he’s grumpy.
Stay Baby Stay is not practicing good trigger discipline. Also, he just looks so confused. I’m overall worried that he’s accidentally going to shoot himself is his thigh.
At first glance, Up in Smoke looks pretty tame compared to the many, many terrible firefighter romance covers out there. At least the dude is fully clothed and hydrated and not actively on fire. And there are no gratuitous cute pets hiding in the firefighting gear.
But on second glance, it is really creepy. Is that baby a little fire starter or actively in danger? Or BOTH?!?
Oh, and apparently I read Up in Smoke when it came out in 2021 (maybe with a different cover but I don’t remember).
I gave it 3.5 stars and called it “Serviceable, tropey forced proximity/ surprise-a-baby mm romance.” No mention of baby arson at all.
Okay, yes, I’m going to pick the nits. The song is “Ring around the rosey, pocket full of posey” so I don’t even understand the title. Plus, it’s not a Christmas song. It is in fact a song with a dark background, despite that it became a children’s song. So the title irritates me more than the burning lights:)
Ring around the P***y: … and Three, the cover designer needs to re-take the class that taught about Visibility and Contrast.
(With an option on Four, the title writer–who may or may not be the author–needs to get a grip on what makes a good pun, and when a misspelling is warranted. Where’s the sense in “ring around the posey”?)
Does the dude in Up in Smoke have the spinner in his head indicating he is rebooting? Baby arsonist is too hard to believe?
Stay Baby Stay in the fine print indicates he’s expecting an angel under his pit. Peww.
Stay Baby Stay is me when I accidentally drop crumbs down my bra.
And somebody in that third book better be named Posey if that title is supposed to make sense. The cover still doesn’t, but…
This one came up in the results when I was searching for that Tal Bauer book recommended in the last podcast episode and this dude’s face… the expression is rather sinister for what is otherwise clearly intended as one of those “cozy small-town cowboy” romances.
https://www.amazon.com/Whispers-Home-Pickleville-Book-1-ebook/dp/B07PZF5PQ7/
@HeatherS – yeah, he looks like an assassin pretending to be a cowboy
Up in Smoke: It looks as though the guy is saying “Well done, little fella – that’s the right way to start a fire!”
Cover Snark never fails to amuse.
GHOSTLY PROTECTOR: An encounter with the Ghost of Fashion Past! I had to zoom in to be sure she wasn’t holding a gun that was blending into the dark background.
UP IN SMOKE: Buddy, that’s not smoke you smell coming out of that baby. Also you have something in your hair.
RING AROUND THE POSEY: I put little Xmas lights on my head, thinking I’d have time for a few photos before they heated up. NOPE. Those things get hot fast! Maybe that’s the hero’s pick-up line: “Plug me in and things get hot fast.”
STAY BABY STAY: He wants to know his nipple’s “safe & sound” / (per series) but it’s nowhere to be found.