In a recent bonus episode of the podcast (Join the SBTB Podcast Patreon!), I showed off my collection of Barbara Cartland puzzles to Sarah. That then led to a tangent about my curiosity and desire to accumulate more Barbara Cartland merchandise, of which there are some real winners.
But first, puzzles!
In the 80s, Waddingtons released four 555 piece puzzles of Barbara Cartland romance novel covers. I am currently in possession of three of them and desperately hoping I can eventually secure the fourth on Ebay or Etsy. The puzzles are:
I’m missing A Kiss for the King, which features this image:
My hope is to modpodge and frame them once completed. I do worry that some pieces are missing, but one of them, at least, is still factory sealed.
During my searching, though, I’ve stumbled across other pieces of Barbara Cartland merch and I’m always tempted to buy them. The first and possibly the most famous is Barbara Cartland’s The Romance of Food with a striking pink cover and recipes that seem to make liberal use of a jello mould. It was published in 1984.
I believe Cartland has more cookbooks and food-related titles, but nothing quite as interesting to me as The Romance of Food.
But did you also know that Barbara has a board game?! It’s aptly called Barbara Cartland: A Romance Boardgame and was released in 1985. In some listings, I’ve seen the description refer to Cartland as “an eccentric British author.”
The game is described as:
Enter a world filled with romance and royalty. Journey through the most glamorous and exotic settings of Regency Europe. Barbara Cartland: A Romance Game allows one or more players to create their own romance and adventure by overcoming obstacles and experience the ecstasies of true happiness.
Board Game Geek has a few photos of the game pieces, but I honestly have no clue how the game is played or how to “win.”
Do you own any Cartland merch? Can you hook me up with this last puzzle to collet ’em all? Or do you perhaps collect any interesting celebrity or author memorabilia?
I’d forgotten that I have a 1956 book of hers called ‘Be Vivid, Be Vital’ and I’ve just flicked through it.
Our Babs is determined to drag you out of your sad-sack, dowdy existence, and transform your life in every way, and covers subjects such as family, diet, beauty, glands, sleep, your voice, vitamins, your sex life, and yoga(!)
There’s a lot of name-dropping, a definite lack of acknowledging privilege, and an absolute certainty that the writer is correct in all things at all times.
Some of the advice is sensible, some very conventional, especially regarding gender roles (women, always make an effort for your husband and never let him see you without make-up!). Some is unexpectedly progressive and some is sheer quackery. But the overall impression is of a whirlwind of energy and industry who is determined to Make People’s Lives Better whether they want it or not. I find it oddly endearing.
The back cover also has blurbs for two more of Cartland’s advice guides: Marriage for Moderns, and The Fascinating Forties. Apparently she also has an agreeable attraction to alliteration
Finally, if anyone is interested, there’s a motor and plane museum in the south east UK (Brooklands) which has preserved a reading room she set up. It’s where I first found out that she’d done more than write romances at a prodigious rate – more info here:
https://www.brooklandsmuseum.com/explore/stories/brooklands-stories/tales-from-brooklands-barbara-cartland
Back when I read Cartland, I thought those covers were so pretty. Now, after lo! these many years, it strikes me that the fluffy maidens on Cartland’s covers all look kind of shell-shocked and terrified. ‘Course that was the era of big-eyed children paintings, so creepy was cool!
Is it scary that I still have a pretty visceral memory of the cover of The Secret of the Glen? Want to know why? Look at his body. LOOK AT IT!! How tall is this guy? His knees are where his feet should be. Freaked my 12yo self out.
I have a Pride and Prejudice/Jane Austen collection. Mostly books. I decided I need to stop collecting pretty covers, because my kids will just donate them, and why waste that money.
Honestly, I just love the Old Skool romance merch. It feels like we don’t get a lot of official stuff nowadays – lots of fan-made items, of course, but this kind of thing is just a lot of fun. I was reminded of an 80s-ish Silhouette Romance commercial I saw on Instagram recently, where an older lady was waving goodbye to her grandkids and then went back inside to put her feet up and read her category romance novel. She looked so happy – she’d had a good day and then got to kick back and read a good book.
This post prompts a need for a romance merch roundup post, where y’all have to share any and all licensed romance merch (vintage or more recent) that you’ve collected with us.
What a fun post and comments, Amanda. When I was a young teen, I had a collection of over a hundred Barbara Cartland romances all of which I had read and reread. I had no merch then or now. I do hope that you find that last puzzle and the book. I’ll be keeping a lookout when next I visit a thrift store.
@PamG, yes! I cannot look away from the eyes!
I vaguely remember the cookbook… it’s possible my mom got it from the library, because it certainly wasn’t in her vast collection.
I’m convinced that “The Secret of the Glen” is that that poor woman is D.E.A.D.; live women don’t have heads and limbs that go so severely askew like that (unless the real secret is that she’s a marionette).
I quit reading Cartland when I realized that she plagiarized another romance author – all I had to do was compare the copyright dates.
But that didn’t stop me and a friend from reading the back-cover blurbs of Cartland books aloud to each other in dramatic tones in high school. I still remember the funniest, which concluded with a paean to “the long years of successful Anglo-Argentinian cooperation in the frozen meat trade”. That’s romance! (/s)
I’ve always wanted to get some really lurid 1980s romance novel covers as wall posters. Sadly, I was never able to find any such posters. I rather like the Cartland puzzles too, maybe I’ll be able to find one of those.
@MsB Who did she plagiarise? I’ve never seen that before. Wouldn’t surprise me though
@Gill, @&MsiB
I actually quit reading Cartland for the same reason. I recall one of her novels shared a bunch of plot points with These Old Shades. I was outraged , as TOS is one of my favorites and the Cartland novel was but a pale imitation. A brief exercise of google-fu yielded an article titled “Plagiarism in Regency Romance” which explores this very premise.