I’m honestly not sure what having all the images from the episode in the podcast entry would do to the feeds it serves, so I’ll be doing a separate entry with all the visual aids and linking it.
You can also find all the RTRW content at our category page for Romantic Times Rewind.
And, most importantly, if you want to listen and follow along with this entry, we have more detail in the audio, but you can click play and listen and read and absorb all the visual goodness:
Let’s take a look at all the screengrabs and visual fascinations we found in the reviews section of RT Book Reviews, May 2014!
Amanda pointed out how neat it was that instead of celebrity names or brands or whatever in the sidebar, the headliners are all romance authors – which is just so cool.
Also: two hundred and ninety-eight books reviewed and rated. MY GOSH.
I will never get over that the magazine sticker price was $4.99.
Before we get into the individual books, let’s take a look at this rubric:
![The rubric or review ratings explained in detail: scorcher borders on erotic very graphic sex hot most romance novels fall into this category ranges from conventional lovemarking to explicit sex. Mild: may or may not include lovemaking no explicit sex. And then the grades four and a half stars GOLD phenomenal in a class by itself, four and a half stars fantastic- keeper. Four stars, compelling - page-turner. Three stars - enjoyable, pleasant read. Two stars: problematic, may struggle to finish, and one star Severely flawed Pass on this one](https://i0.wp.com/smartbitchestrashybooks.com/WP/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/Screenshot-2023-09-20-at-12.03.41-PM-e1696274078785.png?resize=600%2C66&ssl=1)
Ok, for starters, there’s two classes of info here, right? The ‘heat level’ and the grading rubric.
The heat level is baffling:
- Scorcher: borders on erotic, very graphic sex
- Hot: most romance novels fall into this category, ranges from conventional lovemaking to explicit sex
- Mild: may or may not include lovemaking, no explicit sex.
What’s the difference between “lovemaking” and “sex?”
For that matter, what is the difference between “conventional lovemaking” and “explicit sex?”
What about “conventional sex” and “explicit lovemaking?”
And why make a taxonomy for heat levels that has a mid-level so broad that ‘most romances fall into this category?’
Baffling, I tell you.
And then the grading rubric really adds to the alluring scent of WAT?
- Four and a half stars GOLD: phenomenal, in a class by itself
- Four and a half stars: fantastic – keeper
- Four stars: compelling – page-turner
- Three stars – enjoyable, pleasant read.
- Two stars: problematic, may struggle to finish
- One star: severely flawed, pass on this one
If the SBTB grades were to be aligned with this rubric, and I did no math here so my results may be wonky, it seems like there’d be A+, A, A-, B, D, F.
But further complicating the confusion perfume: most of the grades are between the top four grades. For example, these are the rankings for the historical romances in May 2014:
Everything is between 3 and 4.5 TP? So the range is really 4.5TP, 4.5, 4, 3, with an elusive 2 in a few sections in this issue. Alas, no 1-star reviews, but we shall perhaps find one in a future issue.
Also, every time I see “TP” I think ….
Let’s get into the reviews, shall we?
In the podcast episode we explain that we’ll be talking about a book from each genre section that jumped out at us.
One aspect of RT that remains interesting is that most of the reviews do not include an image of the book cover. Was the idea was to entice publishers to book ads for their current releases, and those would contain the visual imagery of the cover? Either way, the text and the rating are what stand out, and only a few covers are included.
For example, this is the review for the book I picked, The Witch of Clan Sinclair by Karen Ranney:
But the cover is not included. Would the cover have influenced me to pick up the book?
Eh? I wouldn’t have gotten “Lord Provost of Edinburgh” or “women’s rights activist” from the image, but I also wouldn’t have thought that image matched that review. Oh – and Addicted to Romance has an image of the stepback, if you want to see it.
Similarly, the review for A Wedding by Dawn by Alison DeLaine jumped out at Amanda:
But there’s also an image of the book, and THIS DRESS MY GOSH.
I just had some Jessica McClintock for Gunne Sax prom dress flashbacks:
Yes, I wanted to wear a dress like that to prom. IT WAS THE EARLY 90s, ok?
MAINSTREAM FICTION
I stand by my assertion that this is a horror novel disguised as Giffin-esque women’s fiction:
The review, in case you’re wondering why I’m saying it’s horror – it’s NOT THE DOLLS making me say that!
A Brooklyn mommy group on a weekend away with spouses and children where things go sideways.
No. A thousand screams of no. That is all a nightmare.
Amanda mentioned Under a Summer Sky by Nan Rossiter:
Can you guess why this jumped out at Amanda?
I can’t say that I’m aching to join a Gin and Chowder Club, but I do like gin, so maybe Gin and…assorted snacks? On the beach?
A special mention to Wendy Williams’ (!!) novel, Hold Me in Contempt.
That is a very sexy cover.
Teen Scene
I talked about Dorothy Must Die by Danielle Paige and Y’ALL the COVER. It wasn’t in the magazine and WOW. I feel like I missed out!
We also talked about a cover that was so visually bothersome to us both, I’m putting it behind a spoiler tag.
Seriously, it gave both of us the creeps.
So uncomfortable. Her hands and her expression especially. Very unsettling.
Inspirational Romance
Amanda was curious about While Love Stirs by Lorna Seilstad, which features a “peppery heroine and a tasty hero” according to the review, and a fantastic Easter hat on the cover according to us:
Now that I’m looking at a larger scale version of the cover, I’m pretty sure I made a seed bead necklace like that one back when I was teaching art at summer camp.
That periwinkle, though!
Sci-Fi and Fantasy
Today in THIS COVER IS GORGEOUS MY GOSH GOLLY:
This book appears to be out of print, and used copies are $50-115 dollars. What gorgeous art, right? My goodness. This was edited by Daniel José Older and Asher Rose Fox, and I’m so curious about their experience with this anthology.
Amanda was charmed by this 4 1/2 star TP (heh heh) review by Regina Small for The Severed Streets:
“He’s strictly into killing powerful white men.”
Ok!
Mystery/Suspense/Thriller
You could tell me this book was brand spanky new in 2023 and I’d believe you.
Not just the cover, either – the plot, too!
A group of witch friends keeping one of their own from being framed for the murder of an abusive spouse? I wouldn’t be surprised to see that as a tv series or short-run miniseries tomorrow.
Romantic Suspense
I was mighty squicked out by the premise of this couple’s connection as described in the review:
He “uses quotes from her books in conversation” seems like a bad choice for dating technique, right? That’s so creepy. And the cover is really…something.
The silhouette on the left…is that George Washington?
Amanda was charmed by Partners in Crime by Downey Greene, because it’s “filthy [and] engrossing.” So I’m guessing no “lovemaking” and more straight to explicit, filthy sex?
Honestly, I’ve said this so many times over the years: if we sell reviews, they will be of one type: “this book had too much sex in it,” with a side order of “FILTHY.”
Look at that hand on that ass, and they’re about to get down to it in an…alley? Backstage? I’d suggest an alternate location but they seem determined.
Paranormal Romance
Both Amanda and I flagged this review because it was one of the very few two-star ratings in the entire issue.
Vampire twins forming vampire houses? I’d also be completely unsurprised by that miniseries.
Urban Fantasy
Amanda was ticked that this book was described as “an irresistible hoot!”
Meanwhile I was fascinated by Sparrow Hill Road to the point that I downloaded the audiobook – review for that tomorrow!
There are two covers, as I discussed with Amanda in the episode. This is the original cover as pictured in the magazine:
And this is the newer cover:
Which do you like better?
Shortest review: if you like ghost stories and puzzles and folklore, you’ll like this.
Series
Amanda is right: that first line!
But check out the cover!
Are they…flying?
And this is the cover for Twelve Hours of Temptation by Shoma Naryanan, which received two stars.
I struggled with the review because of the language choices (“challenging…to engage with” and similar gets my hackles way way up) and I’m now second guessing my criticism.
Erotica
Remember when so many of the covers looked like these?
And that’s the last of the books we discussed as we read all the reviews in this issue. There were SO MANY.
Our next episode will examine the advertisements and features in this issue, and that’ll air on October 20. And remember, if you join the Patreon, you’ll get access to the entire issue as a PDF.
What do you think? Have you read any of these? Which would you recommend?
And most importantly: Would you join a Gin & Chowder club?
The cover designer for the redesigned Sparrow Hill books actually got that job from making fanart shirts of sparrow hill and the October Daye books.
IIRC, RT rarely gave negative reviews bc they were promoting the genre and its authors and didn’t want to ruffle any feathers. That’s why 1990s sites like The Romance Reader and All About Romance were so important in providing reviews that weren’t fluff.
I didn’t know Wendy Williams wrote a romance novel!? The things you learn almost a decade too late! It’s interesting how some novels seem completely different from the cover art. There were quite a few that I might not have wanted to read based on the cover, but the review sold me and vice-versa.
Bernadette Banner has a YouTube series where she repaints romance covers to match the descriptions in the book and the historical setting. I wonder what she would do to some of these.
re: Between the Sheets. No, the silhouette on the left is definitely Ruth Buzzi!