Help A Bitch Out - SOLVED!

HaBO: She Takes “Maidenhead” Too Literally

You did it! We figured this one out! It is a truth universally acknowledged (by me for certain) that the Bitchery pretty much knows everything, and really, it's true. Scroll down to see the solution for this HaBO - and many thanks!

This HaBO comes from Kim, who wants to find this historical romance:

The book is about a young woman who goes to live with a duke(?) she is supposed to marry. This aristocrat has a twin brother who lives in the mansion (the hero of course). The young woman believes that her “maidenhead” is her actual head and when the twin sees it, she panics and yell at him for “taking her maidenhead.” The duke isn’t really interested in the girl; he is having an affair with the butler. The twin ends up getting the girl pregnant, and the duke wants to sell the baby to the king who has a demented queen who thinks she is pregnant.

I don’t remember much more about the book, other than the title had “Star” in it somewhere and it was probably written in the 80s.

Wow that description really took a turn.


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  1. Karin says:

    I have no idea what the HABO is, but it reminded me of a pun in an old Jo Beverly book. In this book, the hero and heroine have sex for the first time. Afterwards, he mentions that they should come up with a pet name for his penis, so they can talk dirty in public without anyone else realizing what they are discussing. So she says, OK, I’ll call it the Thames. He thinks she came up with that name because it’s so big and powerful, with a mighty flow, but she says no, because it goes through Maidenhead.

  2. MelMc says:

    Karin, that was exactly the scene going through my head when I read the title of this HABO.

  3. LJO says:

    Ohhhhh my. Krazypants, but I want to know.

  4. Lisa F says:

    This sounds bananas and I need to read it.

  5. Betsydub says:

    And this is a “romance”????

  6. Margarita says:

    Tha last two HaBOs are soooo crazy!

  7. Jen says:

    I’m in love with the cuckoo bananapants factor of these most recent HaBos. I hope this one gets solved because I want to read it with RELISH

  8. cleo says:

    Huh, I vaguely remember reading a romance set in King Henry VIII’s court that dealt a little bit with Queen Mary’s false pregnancy (maybe by Jane Feather?), but I’m pretty sure it didn’t include twins or affairs with the butler.

  9. Laura says:

    I’m here for the reveal of this bonkers AF novel.

  10. Star says:

    I’m so confused…was this the first time in her life that anyone had ever seen her head?? I hope so and also do not understand.

    Partially remembered summaries of absolutely bonkers books are truly one of life’s finest pleasures.

  11. denise says:

    so bizarre.

  12. spinsterrevival says:

    My absolute favorite thing in some of these is the amazing record-scratch moment in the description; I’m not sure if it’s a siren’s call or a red flag, but either way I’m here for it.

  13. I vaguely recall a naive heroine who was afraid of men seeing her head uncovered because she’d lose her “maidenhair” but I don’t think it was this bonkers HaBO.

  14. Kim says:

    I FOUND IT!!!! Passion Star by Mallory Burgess! Published in 1988.

  15. Betsydub says:

    Great job, Kim! And thanks for giving inquiring minds the answer, too. I hope the re-read was as bonkers as the description was.

  16. Woot! Great job, Kim!

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