Welcome back to Cover Snack!
Sarah: I know we don’t need to anthropomorphize bears any more than they already are, but in my mind, this bear is yelling ENOUUUUUUGH!
Amanda: There’s something so comforting about the consistency of yelling bears and wolves on shifter covers.
Sarah: I want to make a compilation video of some song with a lot of hollering and just show yelling bears and wolves from shifter covers.
From Pam G: I wonder if you’ve seen this cover. I find it weirdly fascinating. Is it snark or is it awe or is it just wtf?
Sarah: I just realized I’m out of hand moisturizer at my desk.
That guy must be SO itchy.
Lara: Is it just me or is his head a bit misshapen?
Amanda: It reminds me of the skin close ups in Roc commercials where they would show skin next to some dry lakebed.
From Syntha: This sheep LOL
Sarah: The sheep is named Tarquin. Tarquin has adventures. I’m here for Tarquin gallivanting wildly around the were-zoo, causing mayhem and giving no fucks.
Amanda: We must protect sweet Tarquin at all costs.
From Melodie: Less dangerous warrior outcast and more like he just discovered he shouldn’t fall asleep while chaperoning his tween-aged sister’s slumber party when the girls are playing with cosmetics and hair gel.
Sarah: Toddler with the sharpie! TODDLER WITH A SHARPIE!
Amanda: I’m getting dalmatian vibes.
I think Scarred has laid his bike down one too many times and has a serious case of road rash. Dude, that’s why they invented leathers. Wear some. And a helmet.
I could not figure out what kind of animal Tarquin is – that doesn’t seem like a normal sheep but maybe that’s why he’s in the zoo.
Is that a tattoo on Scarred’s back, or is it the scar of the title? Maybe he was inspired by one of Terry Pratchett’s golems, he looks like he’s been baked too long at too high a temperature.
@LisaM: the sheep has been shorn, much as the man has been depilated. I’m guessing that gets carried over when the shifting happens.
Ironic that that first cover shows up in the middle of the Man vs Bear debate. Here, you got both in one package; now what do you do?
@hng23 Ah thank you, I see it now.
Let’s focus on Targuin. I can’t possibly be the only one whose mind leapt straight to bestiality, conceding that she is rather a pretty sheep … and then, having assimilated the cover text, ditto ditto wondering what the fifteen preceding “weres” were. And did the cover artist think through the ramifications of him–I gather it’s a him–being de-horned? Do they crop them every time he shifts, or was there a magical De-Horning Ritual that made them disappear forever? (@hng3 and @LisaM: An alternative explanation is that he shifts to a short-haired breed.)
Honorable mention to Scarred. Is Jim Snyder reduced to writing contemporary romance? Oh, whoops, my bad, it’s Jm or possibly JM. Is it the cover designer, or the author, who doesn’t know how initials work?
@Louise ramifications!
For the shifter video, I immediately thought of using sky cowboy, but with bears/wolves doing the screaming https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uLeAot4Zrxo&pp=ygUKc2t5IGNvd2JveQ%3D%3D
@Louise, I had the same thought… that’s an ewe. But then Wikipedia informs me that the rams are polled in some breeds. And I wondered about Tarquin’s predecessors. If we’re going alphabetically, then Tarquin should be #20. So who got skipped? Obadiah? Ishmael?
That last one looks like he’s underwater, which made me think he’s covered in black leeches.
So, dude from “Scarred” looks like that because he’s blistering from the sunburn that that Old Skool sun reflector behind him caused. You just know he used that ‘60s Cocktail of Death,
baby oil ‘n’ mercurochrome (I doubt he shook it really well… because that makes all the difference).
On Tarquin… I am stuck on how bad the kerning is. It’s book sixteen, and yet “W ER E – ZOO”
All Eighteen Books on the series have the same messed-up kerning.
Also, I think the sheep/lamb/ewe is supposed to be an albino doe, per book description.
Sarah, for the compilation of hollering shifter animals, how about the “screaming sky cowboy” song on Youtube? (If you haven’t seen it . . . words can’t really explain the video, it must be watched.)
Re: @Betsydub (me) – sorry for the bad info on the sunburning. That’s baby oil ‘n’ IODINE, not mercurochrome*, in case anyone feels compelled to try it. Just make sure to have the sun reflector, and definitely a pack of Marlboro Reds and a six-pack of Tab at the ready.
Ah, the 60’s…
(*taken off the market due to – you guessed it – its mercury content)
Did no one else think that “Scarred by JM Snyder” was the full title of the book? I mean, it seemed unduly specific, but . . . Just me then?
Also, I’m wondering what Dangerous Bond’s relationship to James Bond is?
@Louise I’m choosing to read “ramifications” as a pun.
@Ramdall M No, but something like that happened to some of us on another book in a recent post so you’re probably not alone.
SCARRED fellow is an EXTREME dude who WORKS HARD, PLAYS HARD, and SLEEPS HARD on EXTREMELY WRINKLED SHEETS. (Sorry for all the caps.) Also there is something kind of compelling about the scantily-clad dude in that slightly odd pose on a motorbike. Tho he looks a little out of scale with it to me, but that might just be my ignorance of motorbikes.
Also the title CHASED BY A BEAR does not conjure romance for me (no judgies if it does for you), it suggests a camping trip gone horribly wrong. Also it reminds me of a anecdote told by an acquaintance who in his youth was chased by a bear when his buddy unwisely picked up a bear cub.
Also also, the bear is screaming because the letter A is stabbing its head.
@LisaM, your Terry Pratchett comment and comment that he had been baked too long legit made me laugh out loud! thank you for the chuckle!
Ok, it’s not screaming wolves or bears, but may I present this utterly ridiculous video:
Sorry to ruin the fun, But Tarquin turns out to be another bear shifter. Therefore, he should be screaming. You just can’t tell because the cover artist has removed his head from the photo. Because they were tired of all the screaming, obvs.
The sheep has only one thing to bleat. Say.
Hello, Clarisse…
Two things. First Chased by a Bear made me think of the wonderfully difficult to pull off stage direction from Shakespeare, “Exit, pursued by a bear.”
And second, Toddler With A Sharpie absolutely needs to be the name of a heavy metal cover band.