Dust off Ye Olde Eyewash Station: it’s time for retro cover art, courtesy of Diane, who sent me a collection of lovely awesome books, with truly spectacular covers, which I found again when cleaning out my book-gasm of an office.
Sarah: When even the Real Doll™ rejects your attempts to reach first base, it’s time to think about rewriting your eHarmony profile, is all I’m sayin’.
Candy: Zombies are so passé. The new horror trend? Reanimated mannequins, bent on making everybody dress in ironic 80s fashions. Just take a look at the latest sure-to-be-classic George Romero horror flick, “Night of the Disco Mannequins.” They’re not set on eating your brains, but they’re definitely going to try and make your shoulderpads bigger.
And because the picture is just too great to be believed, here’s a close up:
Sarah: For a long time, I wondered where Garth Brooks got his fashion sense. And even though I know the answer to that question now, I remain as mystified as ever as to WHY.
Candy: That is possibly one of the most porntastic ‘staches I have ever seen, and that woman looks like she’s ready to knock if off his friggin’ face. I love it!
Sarah: Ah yes, Prince Joe. Prince of what, you ask? Mulletshire, obviously. In the region of Feathering Blowdryer, kingdom of Northwest Mousse.
Candy: Daaaaamn. With hair like that, His Royal Highness there doesn’t need a helmet when he goes ridin’. I suppose if it weren’t so flammable, the military would’ve looked into developing the Aquanet Forcefield a long time ago.
