by SB Sarah • Thursday, September 02, 2010 at 05:45 AM
The ever-awesome LadyRhian did some scanning, and then Candy and I did some screaming and some rushing and some eyewashing, and now it’s your turn to feast your eyes on the retro majesty.
Don’t say we didn’t warn you. As usual, these covers are NSFW in the fuchsia sense. I mean, there is NO way you can pass off that you’re doing work if you’re caught having a look-see at these.
Candy: Candy: I’ve encountered a lot of goofy names for schmeckies, but this is the first time I’ve heard it being called a Venus. Unless the title’s referring to the razor? I mean, this happy couple are kind of preternaturally shiny.
And speaking of preternatural: Holy Brylcreem bouffant, Batman! What did the stylist do, like, make the male model dive headfirst into a vat before posing for the shot?
Sarah: If the quality of a romance can be determined by the percentage of the cover that is turquoise and fuchsia, this book must be an absolute keeper of all keepers.
Also, why are there pink and purple bubbles emerging from her backside? She farts in colors, like the night?
Candy: Not only do they dare to kiss a cowboy, they dare to wear buckskin fringe. A LOT of buckskin fringe. The gayest (and I use that word with a lot of affection, because I loves me some gay) buckskin fringe that ever fringed. My only question is: where’s the cowboy? Is he hiding? Is he hiding (wait for it…) IN THE FRINGES?
Sarah: What do you think his tribal name is? “Rides with Jingle Knees?” “Armbands Do Not Make Him Gay?” “Stole the Vitalis?”
And more importantly, if this book was published in 1994, and that’s the “cowboy” there on the left, was Harlequin publishing M/M cross-dressing romance over 15 years ago and not telling anyone!?
Candy: Not so much vixen as corpse shot through a lens generously smeared with Vaseline to hide the fact that she’s, y’know, taxidermied. But “My Lady Rigor Mortis” just wouldn’t sell as many copies.
Sarah: On the turquoise-and-fuchsia scale, this book would give “Venus Rising” a run for its money, especially in the eyeshadow category. But what’s the quality indicated by a cover featuring Almost-Getting-to-Second-Base with a side order of Possible-Buttsecks?
by SB Sarah • Thursday, September 02, 2010 at 04:14 AM
Our Bookmatcher, Billie Bloebaum from Powell’s Airport SuperEdition, has a HaBO request:
Okay. Now it’s my turn to hope the Bitchery can help me out.
It’s been close to thirty years since I read this book—sometime in the mid-
to late-seventies. There’s a good chance that it was published in 1976 for the
Bicentennial. It was a novel for younger readers and one of the featured
characters was the Marquis de Lafayette. The book was possibly told in first
person from the heroine’s perspective. I don’t remember much about the plot,
except that there was a banquet fairly early on where a lot of talk revolved
around the war. I seem to remember that the heroine was betrothed—my mind
seems to think it was to Lafayette, but that isn’t historically correct, so
it’s likely she was engaged to another and just kind of got all swoony for
Lafayette. (And if the paintings of him are accurate, it must have been his
fortune, his brilliant mind, or a finely-turned leg that did her in.) I *do*
know that the novel took place in the U.S. and had a white-ish cover with red
and blue used for the title and author. It was a fairly plain cover, with an
oval-framed portrait (of Lafayette?) in the center and the trim size was
smaller than usual for a hardcover, closer to that of a mass market paperback.
Entirely unhelpful, I know, but my excuse is that my age was still in the
single digits at the time. But, this is the book that I would count as my very
first romance, so I’d really like to find it. I’m sure it won’t be as
entrancing as I remember, but it’s driving me batty not knowing what it is.
Please help.
Anyone recall this book? Remember, if the first comment guesses it in one try, and Billie confirms the winner, there be Titles bestowed upon the most helpful HaBO-lator in all the land.
by SB Sarah • Wednesday, September 01, 2010 at 01:42 AM
Jesse Peterson won the author interview I offered for the Brenda Novak Diabetes Auction, and she wanted to talk about her book Married With Zombies, which comes out 1 September 2010.
I decided it might be fun to do a goofy video author interview, and ask Jesse about her book, and what’s next in zombie fiction. She totally went along with my bizarre questions during the RWA conference - we’re in the lobby of the hotel, which fit the odd and silly finished product. Enjoy!
Please email me with your mailing addresses at SarahATsmartbitchestrashybooksDOTcom, with subject line “Crusie Book Winner,” and I shall put the book in the mail asap.
Starting 1 September, with email effective immediately, Leah Hultenschmidt is now Senior Editor at Sourcebooks. Woo hoo! From the official press release:
Sourcebooks Casablanca is now building on this success with the addition of Leah Hultenschmidt as Senior Editor. Leah will acquire romance and YA projects for Sourcebooks’ Casablanca and Fire imprints, and she is the newest addition to the Sourcebooks New York office.
“I’m thrilled to be coming on board at Sourcebooks, whose innovation and commitment to authors is well known throughout the industry,” said Hultenschmidt.
Leah was most recently Editorial Director at Dorchester Publishing, one of the leading independent publishing houses for mass market fiction, where she served over ten years. She specialized in acquiring and editing romance fiction, westerns, and other mass market originals, and also has experience managing content for the Dorchester website. Leah has worked with New York Times bestselling authors Angie Fox and Jennifer Ashley and USA Today bestselling authors Joy Nash and Robin Popp, as well as many others. She developed the award-winning Classic Film Collection within the Western line to bring back into print novels that were the basis for such famous films as The Searches, Destry Rides Again, and The Outlaw Josey Wales.
Starting immediately, Leah can be reached at leah.hultenschmidt@sourcebooks.com. Her first day with Sourcebooks is Wednesday, September 1.
I think this will make SourceBooks’ romance line much, much stronger and I am very curious to see what books are coming our way from her office. As we say in Jersey, fuckin’ A, that’s awesome.
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Okay, now that you all have freaked me out, and made me giggle, I am so looking forward to my wedding night in 18 days. Unfortunately, until then, I have no awesome stories to share, mine or others. But I…
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@Eva— You are quite welcome. I loved Behold Your Queen! and she did one on Ruth, too (if I remember her correctly). I tracked down a hb of Heart’s Conquest (Saxon beauty, Norman hero during 1066), which is my…
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I’m curious as to what happened to the bottom of guy #3’s legs? They seem to stop at the knee while hers dress goes all the way to the bottom edge of the cover.
The Vixen has obviously had a little too much rohypnol at the marina costume party and that nice Mr. Mullet from the houseboat next door is trying to get her home, except her anachronistic Jimmy Choos got caught in her…