Jac asks for your help:
I am in need of some help ladies! I read a book way long ago in the dark
teenage years and am aching to re-read it. The only problem…I have no idea
who wrote it, who published it, or any of the other important names (main
characters, title, location etc.) But all is not lost; I feel it’s fairly
identifiable based on a wondrous sex scene that shocked my teenage
sensibilities to their prudish little toes!So there is angry sex all over this book, and one scene involves a
champagne bottle. He is angry at her/about loving her/some other kind of man
angst and forces her into bed, pours champagne over her, says angry things,
perhaps * gasp* penetrates her with a champagne bottle and so forth.That’s the only thing I really remember. She might have been lured onto a
luxury resort island to extract revenge under the guise of her selling high
priced villas. She forms a bond with the manager of a upscale motel on the
island of course the manager is in cahoots with the leading man.
I hope you all can help me find this one!
Teenager or not, I’d be shocked by the champagne bottle. Damn. I’m crossing my legs now.
No idea what this book is, but the the bit with the bottle would have been a total deal breaker for me. No thank you.
I’m all for fun and games, but something about the way she describes this scene sounds degrading and borderline abusive.
As usual I have no clue…but for once I bet the normally blurry line between “I’ve read that! It’s so-and-so’s,” and “No, it was such-and-such!” will be champagne-bottle-clear within the Bitchery. Sounds like Angry Boner Man strikes again, with an extreme breed of carbonated specificity! I just hope that poor heroine didn’t get a cork in the eye… Unless that’s what she’s into, in which case, more power to her.
Muwahaha, sounds like a Harlequin Presents to me. Or a Thea Devine novel. 😛
My first thought was Susan Johnson; but I don’t remember a modern setting like that. I agree it could quite possibly be a Thea Devine too.
owwie! champagne in my poon? GLASS in my poon? so not working for me.
:: facepalm ::
the champagne bottle narrowed it down to about 5 books, but none of the other stuff matches…
apparently bubbly is getting popular these days…
I dimly recall reading a romance in which, during one hot and heavy session a WINE bottle was used. But she was all for it so it was okay. The book I’m thinking of was set in the past, whereas this HaBO sounds more contemporary, so I’m not really helping at all. I’m just saying the use of bottlewear is not altogether new.
Great. Now I’m going to to go crazy trying to think of the name of the book I’m talking about.
The Angry Sommelier’s Consenting Virgin Ice Bucket
Oddly enough, I was thinking about this a couple of weeks ago and trying to remember the book/author. I think it was an established writer and the book was released in the mid-90’s, with the book being a full-length novel and not contemporary. I keep circling through names beginning with “V”.
Of course, I could be wildly wrong!
That is to funny! You nearly made me spew my coffee out!
Back in the days before I was brave enough to buy a vibrator, I used to use cleaned, empty wine bottles. And then I realized they were glass, and gave that up.
These days, I see articles about glass dildos and think, ouch. Although I hear they’re shatterproof or something.
@Cara McKenna – you just made me very grateful for the spill proofed keyboard on my netbook. *snicker*
I dunno about the book, the Angry Man and the plot excerpt bit sounds like a Presents, except waaaay too risqué.
It is ringing some bells as regards a scene from a film, except I think that was a wine bottle and drunk-sex, not angry.
I gotta say, being of inquiring mind I´m thinking not so much glass splinters as a) unopened, OW, wire cages and foil, do-NOT-want and b) opened, OMGWTFBBQ – I forsee a trip to Casualty to break the vacuum. *shudder*
I’m pretty sure that one’s by Erica Jong.
@Blush
http://www.blowfish.com/catalog/toys/glass_dildos.html
Yeah, you’re right, the do exist.
Sorry I can’t help with the book, Jac. The only foreign object I’ve seen in a romance novel used as a sex toy was a parrot’s feather. And it wasn’t for angry sex either.
Unless your Kegels are like strung out on ‘roids and Olympic-level strong, I don’t think anyone should live in too much fear of a glass dildo spontaneously shattering in their velvet love tunnel.
I tried Googling “romance novel champagne bottle” and the first 1/2 dozen hits were this site, but I did find the following, titled “The Unfinished diary of Rachel Carter”:
http://www.booksie.com/romance/novel/rachel_carter/the-unfinished-diary-of-rachel-carter/chapter/5
However it seems to be an online work, so I doubt if it’s what Jac is looking for.
Actually, that’s the only kind I own. They’re really nice, no splinters or shattering so far (and, without getting into details, I have a couple that are well used), and they get the job done.
However, an opened wine/champagne bottle doesn’t sound pleasant. I would also live in fear of the vacuum that could form from that.
I just recently subscribed to this blog, and boy, am I EVER GLAD I did…you ladies crack me up!!!
I’m not going to be any help, consdering I have never read that book, but I think I may be looking up the title once it is found…I’m intrigued! I would never use a bottle for this purpose, though, being a nurse I an attest to the vacuum problem as a REAL hazzard…
Sounds like old, old JAK when she was writing as Stephanie James. Sex as punishment was pretty big in those. Fortunately, I somehow skipped this one if it was JAK.
@ beggar1015 – The book you’re thinking of is probably Master of Paradise by Katherine O’Neal. I remember that sex scene vividly because two words kept going through my head: suction and ow.
Can’t help with the HaBO title because I can’t thinking of something similar with a contemporary setting, even though Susan Johnson keeps coming to mind.
It does sound like a Susan Johnson book. I know I read one at one time where a bottle was used as a dildo. And isn’t all her sex angry sex? It feels like it. I’ll be interested to see what book this ends up being.
I thought Susan Johnson too, because she shocked the shit out of me as a teenager. Her heroes were always using props. Made me uncomfortable in the girly pants. That said, I can’t remember a damn thing about any of her books, just the memory of finding it all a little too much.
There is a scene in the movie Paris Trout where the crazy man Paris Trout, played by that crazy man Dennis Hopper, rapes his wife (the beauteous Barbara Hershey) with a bottle. But it is not sexy, it’s angry and scary, and altogether offputting.
That movie is based on a Pete Dexter novel.
This has nothing to do with the OP’s question, but I just had to get it out there.
Definitely NOT Jayne Ann Krentz under any of her noms de plume.
Kay
My first thought was “Princess Daisy” because I remember all sorts of strange sex (well, I was young, back then) in that one.
spamword: mother55. Yes, I’m a mother, BUT I haven’t reached 55 yet.
The sex scene described reminds me of a Lori Foster novel, though none of the other plot points line up. The only thing I remember for sure about that novel is that the hero’s last name is “Wilde.”
I know I’ve read at least one Champagne douche scene, but I just cannot place the book. I’ve never read Susan Johnson, so that can’t be what I’m thinking of. Don’t think it’s JAK, even her angry sex from the early books was pretty conventional.
Oh, lard, I adored Princess Daisy and all the other Judith Krantz books back in the day. What I most remember about that book? That Daisy farted in bed after finally doing it with the hero. Hilarity ensued. Never have read that in another romance! I remember getting my hands on Scruples when I was just way too young to appreciate that the heroine blew the pilot after she scattered her dead husbands’ ashes from the plane. I put the book down and waited until college to pick it back up, LOL!
I remember The Lady’s Tutor by robin schone having a champagne scene, but it wasn’t angry.
Mention of the name Erica Jong rang a bell for me. I think it was her historical novel, FANNY, that contained the bottle scene. Spamword central59. No, I don’t think it was central to the plot.
Yeah, it was The Lady’s Tutor by Robin Schone that had the champagne douche scene. But even though the hero fizzled the heroine with it, it definitely wasn’t in anger or for punishment. Set back in the Victorian era, the champagne was thought to prevent pregnancy.
Sandra thinks it’s FANNY by Erica Jong. She emailed me after her comment wouldn’t go through (Sorry about that, Sandra).
Oh, the Judith Krantz books bring back memories. I loved them – I was in high school, I think. I remember my surprise when my mom read Princess Daisy and was scandalized. She thought it was pornographic. By that age I’d already read the rapey Old Skool romances, and was getting into Catherine Coulter and the slightly less rapey but still Old Skool romances, and that’s when I realized I needed to start hiding my books from my mother.
Not exactly relevant, but a good friend of mine in high school had sex with two guys and a wine bottle one night. Seemed to go okay from what she said.
This was what made me think DO NOT WANT. Opened bottles are a bad idea.
LOL! I love this site.
Definitely Susan Johnson had some wine bottles in hers. Wicked, possibly? That one was pretty racy…. or was it the marizipan cherries that was in that book?
Princess Daisy… wow, memories. I was just cleaning out my bookshelves tonight – huge undertaking – and my Mom had forbidden me to read that book – so I did, of course, when I was about 14, and it always stuck with me. Wow!
No help on this post though.
I think that was Janelle Denison… Though I’m no Lori Foster geek, I can’t think of a book of hers w/ a character, last name of Wilde, and I’ve read almost all of them.
As far as the HaBO, wow. I deal w/ enough poor-decision-making end results at work… innards should not be ‘outtards’. Just sayin’.
I’m also going to put in a vote for Susan Johnson. Can’t remember the name of the book but it also shocked the hell out of me as a teenager. The description sounds vaguely the same but I definitely remember the Champagne bottle, really hit my squick button.
Completely off topic, but why does the other Nicole show up with my avatar?
The “Wilde” books are written by Janelle Denison. I’ve read a couple of them, but I don’t remember any with a champagne bottle. I think that would stick with me. A couple of the “Bad Boy” anthologies by Brava have stories by Lori Foster, and a “Wilde” story. That may be why you were thinking she wrote it. I know I’ve read a book with the champagne bottle, but I think it’s Lady’s Tutor that I’m thinking of. That was definitely not angry sex.
On a side note, I agree with some of the earlier comments. Glass dildos are fantastic. Very easy to clean and sanitary, plus some of them are gorgeous. ‘Nuff said. Check out wildinsecret.com for some examples. (NSFW)
hard59: No comment 😉
Ambition by Julie Burchill had a champagne scene that left me slightly aghast as a teenager – I think it involved a headstand and some sort of vag/glass equation. Definitely a sex as punishment book, too – see here:
http://forgotten-classics.blogspot.com/2007/01/julie-burchill.html