My Handsome Sentient Face Mask Protects Me Despite The Ridiculous Conspiracy Theories That He Won’t Also He Pounds My Butt

Summary:

When Tyler meets his friend Mark at the local cafe during a global pandemic, he’s horrified to witness his friend arrive without a face mask. Tyler is even more horrified to learn that Mark is an anti-mask conspiracy theorist, who believes protective face masks are used by Bill Grates to track your blood, and that wearing them will poison you with CO2.

When Mark starts making a scene it’s the last straw, and Tyler quickly drops him as a friend, but not before Mark offers an ominous warning, “that mask won’t protect you!”

This is put to the test when Tyler is walking home from the cafe and is confronted by the Billings Butcher, a notorious maniac slasher. As expected, Tyler’s sentient face mask offers all the protection he could ever need.

Now Tyler is looking to repay the favor with a hardcore pounding that proves love is real when you wear a mask.