This month’s Romance Wanderlust is doomed to be incoherent, because every time I look at pictures of Positano, Italy, I start drooling and losing all capacity for speech. Like other Romance Wanderlust columns, this is neither a review nor an endorsement, because I haven’t been to Positano. I Googled, I saw pictures, I swooned, and here we are.
Positano has been around for a long, long time, which is impressive since it looks like it might slide into the ocean at any moment. The town is built into the side of a hill that slopes down to the Mediterranean Sea. It has survived a terrible tsunami in the 13th Century, pirate attacks in the 15th century, and poverty in the 18th century. Positano is close to Pompeii, Capri, and Naples.
According to Wikipedia, Positano was “an essential stop for the ancient Greeks and Phoenicians on their expeditions to western areas.” It flourished in the 15th through 17th centuries before falling upon hard times. In the 1950s it got a boost from the tourism industry and since then has been a haven for celebrities, a popular movie setting, a destination for tourists, and a home for fashion.
So, let’s say you want to stay in or near Positano. First, please let me come with you. I’ll be very quiet. I’ll sleep on the roof. You won’t even notice I’m there. Second, be prepared for a lot of up and downhill walking. If you plan to do much exploring, and you have accessibility needs, you’ll want to look very hard into transportation options before booking your trip. Most of the streets are pedestrian-only and that photogenic hill means that every walk is up and down. Third, bring a lot of money, or have access to a lot of money, because it’s not a cheap place to visit.
Il San Pietro di Positano is, evidentially, the place to go for high glamour and extravagant service. The hotel was created by owner Carlo Cinque, who launched the hotel by renting a single apartment to tourists. Over the years he built on to the establishment, attempting to do so without damaging the appearance of the area. The hotel is carved into a cliff, with multiple terraces. Today there are 57 guest rooms and the hotel is popular with stars including George Clooney, Tina Turner, and Julia Roberts. The romance practically writes itself. She’s a travel writer. He’s a movie star. They meet in the elevator or on yet another staircase. He buys her gelato. Love is born.
Here are some key phrases that made me want to stay at Il San Pietro di Positano (all the webpages are listed below):
- “Mozzarella grilled on lemon leaves.”
- “Private Beach.”
- “Wrap-around balcony”
- “There is an elevator from the rooms to the beach.” There are a lot of hills in Positano and my knees are shot. Hail to the elevator.
- “Yacht rental.” I have no business renting a yacht. I don’t know how to sail one. However, I feel a happy glow knowing that I COULD rent a yacht if I wanted to.
- “Children under 10 are not accepted.” I love kids, really, I do. My house is constantly full of them. It is for this very reason that I rejoice that the town of Positano has many kid-friendly hotels and I also rejoice that Il San Pietro di Positano is not one of them.
My day was thoroughly derailed by the pdf of the spa brochure. Did you know that you can get a platinum facial? It involves “infusions of pure platinum.” You can get a facial in which they massage your face with rose quartz. You can get a gold facial. You can even get a caviar facial, which…what? Really? Is this what Julia Roberts does? You can also get a more traditional massage that doesn’t include metal or fish eggs.
Should I visit this hotel, the best case scenario is that my joints would hold together, and I’d take the hotel shuttle into Positano and explore uphill and down every day, hand in hand with my special someone. The worst case scenario is that my joints would throw in the towel immediately, in which case I’d hang out reading on my terrace drinking cappuccinos and eating chocolate croissants and looking at the sea, or I’d take the elevator to the beach and eat mozzarella grilled on lemon leaves all day. Either way it seems romantic to me. I’ll probably skip the caviar massage, though.
Sites:
Re the caviar facial: I once got suckered into buying a very expensive facial treatment that reeked of fish. The special sauce was some kind of salmon extract. Fans of the product insisted, “The smell goes away after a few minutes.” No, darlings, the stench does not go away. Your nose, as a defense mechanism, becomes desensitized to the bubbling fish gut bucket that is your face. To everyone who is around you in passing, YOU REEK OF FISH.
I’m sure there’s amazing stuff in sturgeon embryos that will give you the complexion of a particularly photogenic infant for a few minutes, but out of consideration for others, please dwell in solitude after grinding fish products into your pores. For the wealthy, luxury resort employees shouldn’t balk at being asked to sniff a guest’s face to make sure she’s suitable for human companionship before being allowed out of her room. My fellow peasants, just say no to fish face.
Sniggering, sorry Ren, but thanks for the warning so the rest of the bitchery can avoid that particular mistake.
Wow. Looks amazing.
My husband went to Italy after high school and said Positano was gorgeous but Sorrento was even better. Rome, he says, had the best ice cream ever.
He also visited Greece (hot, great ruins) and Turkey (terrifying, men hitting their wives/girlfriends on the sidewalk, bad food).
Positano is beautiful, but with your joints I’d go to Capri!
There’s a film with Marissa Tomei and Robert Downey Jr that is a wonderful travelogue for Rome and Positano. I can’t remember the title. 🙁
@mel burns So of course I immediately had to look up the film, and it must be Only You. IMDB also reminded me that Marisa Tomei was in A Different World, which I had completely forgotten, so thanks for the trip down memory lane! It’s stupid hot here today, so a great day for staying inside and watching movies.
Positano is lovely, but I second Lora’s husband: Sorrento is better, and conveniently located for the ferry to Naples or the islands, and the train to Naples and Pompeii. (See Pompeii. It’s worth it. But take a large bottle of water, sunglasses & sunscreen. Also, watch out for pickpockets.)
The entire Amalfi Coast (and the islands) is CROWDED, so go in the off season; we were there in October, which worked out well & is great weather for doing outdoor touristy things. Skip the luxury hotels & choose a good bed & breakfast – you’ll be steered to locals’ favorite restaurants, shops, & out-of-the-way beauty spots.
The couple who bought our last house share the name and ancestry to this, apparently, fabulous city. They hung an impossibly beautiful art poster of Positano in pride of place in now-their house, and, as Carrie did, I may have drooled.
Now I’m hearing that Sorrento is even better. Obviously a trip to Italy is required.
I lived in Italy for three years, and I agree with those above – Sorrento is better. The island of Capri is awesome. I took a ‘booze cruz’ with a bunch of Marines that stopped in Capri. We had a blast. Highly recommended!
But my all time favorite place to visit was Pompeii because I’m a sucker for history. 🙂 Wherever you go, take me with you. I’ve never had a cappuccino taste as good as they make them in Italy.
I spent a couple of weeks traveling through Turkey by bus with a girlfriend and it was fabulous. *Amazing* food, fantastic sights, and half the price of Greece. We didn’t witness any domestic or other violence. We didn’t have contact with many local women, but the men working in tourism were polite and helpful, and the others left us –two young blonde women — alone. That was a couple of years before 9/11, but I wouldn’t hesitate to go back if the opportunity offered.
I have to disagree with what a few people have said about Sorrento being better. Positano is amazing, far better, IMHO, than Sorrento.
It was in Positano that I realised I must have been a Roman goddess in a previous life. My husband knows that when I die, he has to take my ashes to Positano and scatter them from up high so I can forever be in the place of my heart.
If I could only ever go to one place in the world again it would be Positano. Again and again. Love it!
I love Positano, Sorrento and Capri (lived in Italy for 5 years). But I also recommend Ischia (near Capri and less crowded) and for a similar feel to the Amalfi Coast, but in Sicily, Taromina.
@Jill Q – you beat me to mentioning Taormina, probably the most beautiful place I’ve been (aside from Venice, which is differently beautiful). It also has that nice, still functioning GREEK (not Roman) ampitheater too. Also, the best cannoli I’ve ever eaten.
I’ve yet to go to Positano or Sorrento, though. I suppose I must so I can compare them to Taormina. Pity.