Rocked by Love by Christine Warren is a paranormal romance where the hero is a gargoyle. Yes, a gargoyle. That stone monster-thing that graces the tops of old and/or fancy buildings and serves as a place for Batman to perch while looking out at Gotham.
Now I wanted to read this book because back in the day (aka the mid nineties) I was a fan of the Disney cartoon series Gargoyles. It was ridiculous, but I was twelve, and the main character was a brooding, muscular gargoyle named Goliath who had a mullet, never wore a shirt and rocked a loincloth. He also had this beauty and the beast unrequited love thing going on with a female detective for the NYPD.
So yeah, I guess I’m into gargoyles.
The gargoyle in this book is named Dag. Not Dan which is a perfectly acceptable name, but Dag. Which immediately made me think of Snatch. “Do ya like dags?”
Anyway, Dag has been asleep for a really long time, and by asleep I mean in stone form, presumably getting shit on by pigeons (or Batman). Dag is one of the seven Guardians who will stand against an evil force known as the Nocturni. The Nocturni are like demons and they sometimes rise up and then the Guardians have to wake up and pound them down to keep a balance between Darkness and Light. Then they go to sleep aka stone again, wait a few centuries, lather, rinse, repeat.
Dag is woken up when a human woman named Kylie Kramer is attacked by the Nocturni. Kylie is a hacker and self-made millionaire (like ya do) investigating the mysterious death of her friend. As she digs she discovers that said friend was involved in all this paranormal stuff and because she now knows things she’s not supposed to, she’s become a target for demon-hitmen. Dag wakes up and saves her.
Kylie calls her friend, Wynn, who is a witch (and the heroine of a previous book in the series), and Wynn fills her in on the whole impending darkness thing. Rocked by Love is the fourth book in the Gargoyle series, and it turns out all the previous heroines know each other in some way. Convenient.
So Kylie finds herself housed with a super over-protective Dag while she and her friends try to figure out WTF the Nocturni are up to. Dag knows that Kylie is his Warden aka his fated mate, and he’s all over that, but she’s like “Waaaaaaiiiiiiiittt a fucking minute here, pal. I just found out that the forces of darkness are conspiring to kill me and that statuary can come to life (beware gnomes and weeping angels) and now I’m supposed to be your girlfriend, too? I need a drink.”
I liked Kylie’s voice in this book, well, most of the time. She’s irreverent and funny and ballsy:
The glare [Dag] shot in her direction could have peeled paint, which made Kylie doubly happy that she rarely bothered with makeup. His lip curled back, revealing a long fang he should not have been carrying around in human form. Pffft. After the last eighteen hours it was going to take a lot more than that to scare her. She’d pulled on her big-girl panties.
Which looked exactly like her other panties, but with a tich more “fuck you” in the elastic.
What annoyed me was how frequently Kylie used Yiddish words to pepper her speech. Kylie was raised largely by her Jewish grandmother and she speaks Yiddish, which is totally cool because I learned what plotz means. But Warren falls into the trap that happens a lot with Scottish characters–the accents words (in this case oy rather than ach) are used so frequently than rather than add color to the dialogue they become a distraction. A little goes a long way with me when a character highlights their speech with dialect or words from another language.
I also didn’t like that Dag conveniently transforms into a hot guy whenever he needs to. I mean, I guess it makes sense because you know he’s not going to fit his wings into an Uber, but whenever Kylie and Dag get hot and heavy, he’s just a normal dude. And maybe I’m a perv, but when you read a book with a monster hero you want that hero to stay in monster form and be a little scary. I mean, Elisa and Goliath hooked up at some point so it can be done–I’m assuming.
Also there was a serious lack of “rock hard” boner jokes in this book. This shit writes itself, people.
Rocked by Love was fun, but I didn’t love it enough to buy the rest of the series. I might check them out from the library. I wanted more gargoyley-ness. I wanted the mythology to be a little deeper and the hero to be a little bit more than a hot, grumpy dude. He’s got wings! Make him take you flying! C’mon! I think overall, fans of paranormal romance will enjoy the series based on the humor and the departure from the typical vampire/shifter mythos. It just wasn’t enough to convert a paranormal dabbler like me.
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In Aussie/Kiwi English, a dag is a piece of sheep poo that gets stuck to its wool, and by extension, it’s a slang name for someone who is severely uncool. Either way, it’s not a winner of a name for a hero!
Is drag only slang for an uncool person in Australia? Plus, is it not perhaps also the leftover bit when a sheep’s tail is trimmed? I haven’t googled it yet to find out if I’m right.
Oh I’ve just checked and its poo-laden wool. And I can see another commenter has also made the connection 🙂
Dag is a perfectly normal name in Norway (it means “day”) – and also the name of a close relative of mine, which is now freaking me out a little;)
When I first saw disneys Beauty and the beast as a kid, I remember feeling so disappointed for Belle that she didn’t get to keep her beautiful beast but was stuck with this horrible Fabio look-a-like. I still think she got screwed in the deal (pardon the pun).
I like the name Dag! It’s Swedish too. But GOOD TO KNOW about the Aussie/Kiwi meaning of the word.
I’m soooo glad someone else remembers Gargoyles–one of my favorite shows as a kid! I’m also glad I’m not the only perv who loved the idea of an Elisa/Goliath romance. Think I’ll pass on this book, though. I mean, if he doesn’t take her flying, what’s the point?
Frida – I know, right? That’s one more name off the list* of “names that won’t shame baby when he/she grows up and wants to move abroad”.
*List already including Odd, all names beginning with Hell-, Simen, Even and Randi. Thankfully, these are all the wrong generation, anyway.
Half the fun of these ships it’s monster sex (Except for Beast because he hated that body and had been transformed against his will as child so I could never get behind him staying that way). Elisa and Goliath were one of my first ships. C.E. Murphy had a series with a gargoyle hero and I remember enjoying those books (though they were UF with a romance). I always get mad when I think about that series though. It was the first time I encountered (or, more accurately, noticed) the “Our heroine is Black but let’s hide that little fact” book covers.
For gargoyle sex where all the monster parts stick around, try The Wild Road (Dirk & Steele #8) by Marjorie M. Liu. I love that series as a whole, and that book in particular.
For a better gargoyle read I suggest Stone Guardian by Danielle Monsch. Heroine stands up for the hero’s form when taking him home to meet the family because that’s who he is and won’t let him shift. (Although that scene may be part of an after story.)
I think it’s a shame that the GARGOYLES show never had a finale/resolution but just had a series of increasingly weak series.
And I echo the sentiments that books promoting themselves as a romance between a human and gargoyle/werecritter/monster/alien should have some sex between the human and the other while in non-human form. Considering most romances are between two regular people, it seems mean to dangle the possibility of something different and then deliver the same old stuff.
(Also, for those interested there’s a new porno called BEAUTY AND THE BEAST XXX that’s an adult take on the fairy tale. It’s worth noting that, based on the box, the beast makeup consists of a beard and bushy eyebrows.)
I wondered what you thought of this after I got an email from someone about the release. I did remember that I tweeted to you that there were so many ways you could go with a gargoyle. I, also, loved the cartoon, which is why I clicked through to learn about the book and then recalled you had tweeted that you were reading it. There was mixed feelings the book on GR. In Hamilton’s Merry Gentry series, you get to read about the monsters having sex. Gotta love the fae.
@jimthered, Gargoyles, like a lot of those series fell victim to the need to give kids “wholesome” viewing choices with morals and crap like that. While perfectly positioned to throw a little dark and edgy to a teen audience, it got dumbed down instead.
I’m always on the look out for a good gargoyle story as I, too, crushed on Goliath. Considering how old I was in the 90’s, that’s a little weird… Anyway, sad this wasn’t better for you. Although…
Which looked exactly like her other panties, but with a tich more “fuck you” in the elastic.
I’m using this.
I finished Thea Harrison’s Shadow’s End this morning wherein the MC goes half shifted a couple of times and Bel, our heroine, expresses some deep disappointment when he gets hold of himself. She does finally get her hulked out fangy kiss before the end of the book. YAY! Although why a character that has an eagle head in his shifted form would grow fangs… nevermind. Book was too good to quibble about the small stuff. I’ve got my fingers crossed because she does have a gargoyle character in the series. Please, Thea, pretty please?
I’m really enjoying Faith Gibson’s Stone Society books. They books set in the future, after an apocalypse, & deal with cloning, zombie like creatures, & gargoyles. The first book, Raphael, seemed a little glitchy in the writing, but I loved the story idea & the characters enough to continue on. Word of warning, the 4th book deals with domestic abuse & is quite graphic. As uncomfortable as it made me, it wasn’t done for shock value & I appreciated that the author didn’t try alluding to the abuse (approach the scene & then fade out). At the end of the book she includes a link to a site about & how to help stop domestic abuse. Her latest release deals with a homosexual gargoyle & I loved it. All these books are on a time line with connected characters so they do need to be read in order.
@Rikki: I loved CE Murphy’s gargoyle series. Now I have to read them again. Thanks!
@Anna if you want a Beauty in the Beast where Beauty ends up with an actual beast rather than a human one of Robin McKinley’s retellings ends that way although I can’t remember if it is Beauty or Rose Daughter, I think Rose Daughter.
Kind of off subject but…
Gargoyles ( the 1972 tv movie, not the cartoon) is my husbands scary movie to remember as a child. He said it really scared him when he was a kid. So of course I had to buy it for him. Hah! I thought it was funny that my scifi/ monster loving bad ass Marine hubby was afraid of gargoyles. lmao.
Mine was The Exorcist (1973) woke up after dosing from a late night tv marathon with my mom and The Exorcist was on. Yikes! Of course I couldn’t look away. My mom was still dozing until I smashed myself next to her, clawing at her. lol I realize it is pretty tame by today’s standards, but in the mid 70’s it imprinted itself in my mind as scariest movie of my childhood.
Of course my mother bought me the movie when I reached adulthood. We are a weird bunch with a perverse sense of humor. I have never watched it again. Nor has my husband watched his Gargoyles. lol.
I really don’t mind the name Dag. I think there are worse names I have come across in my book reading. Actually that might make a good Bitchery topic. Least favorite hero/heroine names.
Don’t blink.
@Mara B, thanks for the tip. @Michelle in Texas, it would make a great romance, the weeping angels as heroes, or maybe they were all female so heroines.
I’m reading the first book in the series and the love scenes were the exact same way all vanilla. I was kind of relieved it wasn’t too weird but disappointed at the same time because I feel like it could have been really hot without being too creepy like how Kresley Cole does her supernatural sex scenes with her demonic characters. It is also kind of irritating at the same time because the heroine claims to love him no matter what he looks like and I’m thinking prove! I loved the Gargoyles cartoon T.V. series but I never crushed on any of the characters. The romance between Goliath and Elisa Maza may have grossed me out a little but they were so cute together then Goliath became human once and I was able to make a connection that changed my mind. So it would have been nice it there had maybe normal the first time then kinky gargoyle the second time I guess so everyone gets a fix.
I read a lot of Warren’s previous books on the supernatural, and she always does this. No wolf sex. No lion sex, unless they’re both in their animal forms. Nothing g out of the ordinary. Its BORING. Give me some awesome, out there, “is your dick actually stone?” Sex, and make it WORK. If you’re gonna write the paranormal, be bold.
If you want short but very naughty gargoyle romances, try “Hard as a rock”by Mina Carter. The title says it all… 🙂