Well. It’s been a wild ride, and I’m not just talking Shane on Ilya’s dick. Just over a month ago, Heated Rivalry slammed into our collective ids like a Texas-sized asteroid. To call it a hit might be an understatement. It’s a phenomenon. Before episode 3 aired, The Onion wrote a satirical explainer for it, which is possibly the clearest sign that you’ve arrived. I have never seen a show of any kind, much less … Continue reading Heated Rivalry Season 1, Episode 6 Recap: Come On, We’ve Got Bad Things to Do →

So we can all agree that nobody was okay after episode 4, right? Like. All of us underwent a complete mental breakdown. Emails went unanswered, meals went uncooked, people with kids achieved Hayden Pike-levels of benign child neglect as “All the Things We Said” played on a loop in our heads. And then episode 5 dropped. To Tierney’s credit, it absolutely healed me of episode 4 trauma. To his discredit, he did it by inventing … Continue reading Heated Rivalry Season 1, Episode 5 Recap: We’ve All Been Very Brave →

Hello, butts I mean sports fans! Episode 5 of Heated Rivalry is nigh, and you know what would be fun? Reliving the trauma of episode 4 together! Here’s a handy-dandy recap of all the major events of the previous episode, just in case you, unlike me, haven’t rewatched this episode every day until you’ve had every agonized expression memorized. Here’s my recap of episode 4 of Heated Rivalry: God these stupid horny boys, they’re so … Continue reading Heated Rivalry, Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: It’s the Tuna Meltdown →