Nice Girls Don’t Ride

by Roni Loren

April 21, 2015 · InterMix

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This RITA® Reader Challenge 2016 review was written by Vasha. This story was nominated for the RITA® in the Romance Novella category.

Here is Vasha's review:

“Nice Girls Don’t Ride” starts with a scenario we’ve read before: it’s Natalie’s 21st birthday and she’s on her way to meet her boyfriend. Not only does her car break down, but she gets conflicting messages from the restaurant and her boyfriend which make her think he’s up to funny business. A handsome stranger passing by in his tow-truck gets her car to the garage and her to the restaurant where she finds her boyfriend dining with her roommate. Will she have a happy birthday nonetheless?

The trick to making a familiar plot setup interesting is to develop the characters with enough individuality that the reader is interested in seeing how these particular people react under these circumstances. I’m happy to report that it succeeds pretty well here. Natalie and Monroe narrate alternating chapters in first person, and they both are interesting to hear from.

We learn at once that Natalie is struggling under a whole load of self-doubt. When Monroe stops uninvited at her broken-down car:

I dial the number to the shop and, of course, they verify that Monroe works for them and is driving the truck today. The guy on the phone sounds amused by my questions. And his reaction makes me realize that I’m being paranoid, that my nerves are officially frayed, and it’s making me act like a bitch.

This breaks my heart, that she calls herself a bitch for taking sensible precautions. It turns out that she grew up poor, and embarrassed by her strung-out mother, and dismissed by everyone (“White trash girls get white trash reputations without even having to do the crime.”) She’s internalized that attitude, thinks her “real nature” is a bad one, and presents an elaborate false front in an effort to be acceptable. In particular she feels she must be nice, and neither lose her temper nor be impulsive — though she’s capable of both. Snagging a rich boyfriend only made her feel worse, because Caleb was adept at the art of putdowns and emotional control. Catching him cheating was her lucky day — even then he tries to convince her that she’s being unreasonable, but she’s not yet worn down enough to fall for it. A nice trait is that she’s described as being not-a-size-2, and although she does wonder at one point whether she’s attractive enough, she’s refreshingly free of guilt and anxiety about what she eats.

Monroe doesn’t have major issues in his life (luckily, since there isn’t room in a novella this size for solving more than one person’s problems). His only dilemma is deciding whether Natalie is someone he wants to keep seeing for more than one night, and he decides that pretty quickly. Although working as a tow-truck driver, he plans to become a chef (which surprises Natalie, in another instance of her internalized class prejudices coming to the surface).

It turns out that he enjoys the company of women who have a wild streak, and when he meets Natalie he recognizes that she does, for all that she’s trying hard to suppress it. Even better, in my opinion: he’s a guy who doesn’t need to be in control every minute. He accompanies Natalie when she confronts Caleb, and just backs her up, admiringly, as she tears strips off the cheater. And when she makes a point by kissing Monroe, his reaction is:

Well, that hasn’t happened in a long time—a girl taking charge and leaving me speechless. I’m usually the one making the moves. But I’m definitely not complaining.

True, he got off to a rocky start at the first encounter, when he gave Natalie “a slow once-over” that she found intimidating. But after that he never again behaved intimidatingly.

This is a short novella. Nearly the whole of it takes place on a single night, as Natalie and Monroe celebrate her birthday and get to know each other. Although Natalie finds Monroe madly sexy, she’s initially determined not to sleep with him — not because she usually wouldn’t give in to that sort of impulse (she’s in the mood to break all her own rules right then), but because she’s mad at Caleb and doesn’t want that interfering, she doesn’t want to feel there’s an element of revenge in what should be “about [her] and the guy.” So Monroe convinces her to ride on his motorcycle (nervously at first), they eat tacos and cupcakes, they meet some of his friends who sing “Happy Birthday,” then they watch the stars and have a serious conversation.

I was very happy to hear that although it was Natalie’s 21st, she drank nothing but one margarita. Yay for making decisions about sex when sober! It may seem a bit out of character, heavy drinking being so ingrained in American culture, but I guess sobriety is one rule Natalie has made (inspired by her mother’s alcoholism) that she thinks is worth keeping. When Natalie decides that she likes Monroe so much that she actually wants to go to bed with him, for no other reason than wanting to do so, it is she who makes the first move. The sex is hot, which is a real compliment coming from me. And when the epilogue leaps forward several months from this day to them realizing they’re in love, it’s believable because their initial connection was so good.

I do have a few complaints about this story, both minor and major. One is that in this story where class prejudice plays such a role, the little that we’re shown of upper-class rich people is pretty caricatured. This could have been done better, no matter the brevity, because the few lines of dialogue Natalie’s ex-boyfriend speaks succeed in showing his abusive nature. I know some readers here object strongly to the use of gendered slurs, so I will mention that Natalie and Monroe both refer to her roommate as a “skank.” Thirdly, at the start of the story, Natalie makes a snappish remark accusing Monroe of “making a quick buck” off her and he retaliates by calling her a sorority princess (she’s wearing a fancy dress, which he doesn’t know at that point is borrowed). He then proceeds to address her as “princess” for the rest of the book, which we’re supposed to think has changed from insulting to affectionate, but I didn’t really think it worked. All those are minor quibbles.

What I really disliked, though, was all the joking about sexual violence and the self-defense classes Natalie took. Consider this exchange:

“For the record, the make-out offer still stands.”

She turns to me, the tension on her face smoothing a bit. “Try it and you’ll see just how skilled I am at self-defense. Warning: they teach us to aim for the soft parts first.”

“Kinky.”

Yeah, Natalie is kind of making a running joke out of how she was alarmed by Monroe at first; but there are multiple places throughout the story where Monroe is dismissive toward Natalie’s fears and her ability to take care of herself. (This in spite of the fact that Monroe sums up Caleb thus: “The way he talked to you… like he wanted to manage you. Like you were on his Day Planner to handle. Fuck that. I’ve known you for three hours and know better than to try that shit with you. You’d castrate me.” There’s a slight inconsistency there. But Monroe’s actions, as opposed to his words, are entirely respectful.) And there’s worse:

“Don’t get any ideas.”

“Oh, too late, princess. I’ve got ideas. Lots of ideas. You don’t kiss a guy like that and expect him to forget it.”

“It was an act.” But her gaze flicks away and her cheeks go pink.

I lean against my bike. “It was hot as fuck. You can’t fake that.”

“I’m not sleeping with you.”

Ha. She wasn’t denying the hot as fuck part. “All right, how ’bout I make you a deal? I won’t sleep with you unless you ask me to.”

Um, not something to joke about, Monroe. And you don’t get brownie points for not sleeping with a woman unless she asks you to. Nonetheless, Natalie acknowledges that he deserves them: “I know you’re being noble—gold stars for you, by the way—but I think I want to kiss you again, too.”

These conversations didn’t ruin the story for me. It’s pretty much a light, fun little tale of the meeting between a woman who’s waking up to the fact that she doesn’t have to censor and limit herself to be OK, and a guy who really gets her.