Title: An Infamous Army
Author: Georgette Heyer
Genre: Regency
DocTurtle, the math professor with the golden compass and a long, long winter break, is back with more Heyer.
Part 3: Chapters 9 through 13
Oh, the intrigue! This most recent installment of my Regency Romance Cliff’s Notes finds Bab flirting with Peregrine Taverner, her brother flirting with Lucy Devenish, Charles more and more busied by the buzzing of a quick-coming war, and the Duke of Wellington continuing to bitch about how ill-prepared is his infamous army for Napoleon “Don’t Call Me ‘Boney’” Bonaparte’s onslaught of Belgium.
Chapter 9. Le déjeuner sur l’herbe
We continue on a jaunty country outing with several of our story’s principles. Charles having been spirited away by his military duties, he entrusts Lady Barbara to his family in order that her going abroad with M. le Comte de Lavisse will not be misinterpreted by the prying public. And so to a charming Château near Merbe Braine on the Nivelles Road go Bab, Lady Judith, Peregrine Taverner and his Harriet, the Count, and all of their assorted footmen and retainers. What a way to go!
A hint of foreshadowing frames their merrymaking, as en route to their destination the party passes a small village named (dum dum DUUUUM!) Waterloo.
Oh, yeah, and Harriet’s miffed that should she permit him to do so Peregrine would gallop off after the ever-enchanting Bab.
Chapter 10. This book’s got more rakes than Home Depot’s lawn and garden section
When Lord George Alastair, Bab’s older brother, makes landfall in Belgium, his first stop is at his family’s home on the Rue Ducale. Finding his younger sister is out, he hunts her down at the Worth’s where yet another ball is taking place. He doesn’t make it past the foyer before setting his sights on that vision of unassuming loveliness, Lucy Devenish.
It would seem that George and Lucy had met before in Britain:
“It was a little more than that. I became acquainted with him when I was staying in Brighton with my cousins last year. There was a degree of intimacy which—which I could not avoid.” Her voice failed. Judith suspected that the attentions of a dashing young officer had not been wholly unwelcome. She had not doubt that Lord George has speedily overstepped the bounds of propriety, and understood, with ready sympathy, Lucy’s feelings upon being confronted with him again. (p. 165)
What, he saw her wrists?!? Oh noes!
All joking aside, our Lucy’s finding herself in quite the pretty pickle.
Chapter 11. Blücher!
I can’t be the only one who thinks of Young Frankenstein on mention of the Prussian General.
One of the commenters on Judge a Book By Its Cover found it hard to keep track of all of the names being bandied about. You ain’t kiddin’, sister! Chapter 11, in which we’re subjected to yet more war preparations and—quelle surprise!—a ball! piles on more names than the Book of Genesis.
But if you’re a fan of eye-gougingly, hair-pullingly punctilious (and doubtless historically accurate) description of military dress, this chapter’s for you. Ms. Heyer could outfit a member of the Brunswick Light Dragoons with her eyes closed.
Most amusing-when-taken-out-of-context line (a.k.a., Vietnamese cuisine only goes so far): “Pho! A precious lot of comfort we shall have when we go into action!”
Chapter 12. More o’ the same
We begin with twelve straight pages of military movements, army massings, and other assorted martial goings-on. The whole narrative is tied together with the Duke’s everlasting exasperated ejaculations: “I have got an infamous army, very weak, and ill-equipped, and a very inexperienced staff,” and “Matters look a little serious on the frontier.”
For once Bab says something agreeable: “I can’t think. I’m bored to tears, Charles!…I am tired of your duty, Charles. It is so tedious!” As Charles can’t bring himself to forgo an appearance at a cavalry party at Lord Uxbridge’s, he begs that Bab take Peregrine Taverner as her escort to a quiet suburban boîte in his stead. Oh, how the tongues will wag!
Meanwhile, the roué Lord George Alastair presses his case with Lucy Devenish, “that chit whose name I never can remember.”
Chapter 13. Girls just wanna have fun
Despite Charles’s assertion that married life will not prove an impediment to Lady Barbara’s helter-skelter social life, she’s out to get in all the fun she can before being burdened by the marital yoke. She fulfills her suburban assignation with Perry Taverner, and oh how the sparks do fly!
Harriet Taverner, having suspected Bab of trying to lure her hubby away since the picnic in Chapter 9, is piiiiiiissed. There are several pagefuls of back-and-forth and he-said-she-said, all amounting to little more than a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury. Things come to a head at the chapter’s close when Harriet publicly snubs Bab, and suddenly the suburban affair (which even Lady Judith Worth takes to “signify nothing”) is poised to become the stuff of Belgian backroom legend.
Oh, and Lord George Alastair is still a rake.
Uncle, uncle! Tell me, Smart Bitches, what have I done to deserve this? Is this the punishment I earned with my unfortunate “bodice-ripper” comments from so long ago?
O’Reilly’s Sex, Straight Up wasn’t much to my taste, and it was often silly, but it was therefore fun. This? This is just dull. She’s more concerned with troop movements and hussars’ fringes and frogging than with putting together a plot more complicated than “oh yeah, Bab’s flirting causes chaos.” There’s not even all that much to snark.
Why couldn’t you have offered me one of Heyer’s more Wodehousian titles to read?
My next assignment had better be more…well, more something. I’m dyin’ over here!
Poor DocTurtle. He needs some hussar fringe. And we’ll have to pick a third novel for him to read, don’t you think?
Ack. sorry to have screwed up my close italics tag, there.
Docs done contemporary and historical, how about something from the paranormal/or vampire genre?
Although Bet Me is my favorite.book.ever, I would love to read the ever-enchanting Doc Turtle’s take on Agnes and The Hitman or Don’t Look Down, since they are written by a man and a woman in partnership. They both have explosions, thus fulfilling my DH’s requirement of worthy reading (or viewing), and smoochies, thus fulfilling our requirements.
Let’s see if that fixed the italics. (it did) I’ll add a second vote for Katie McAlisters’ Aisling Grey series for a paranormal, too. Jim the Demon Newfoundland had me in stitches. *wipes up drool from Boone the demon Newfie pup But…I’m not sure the series is snark worthy and Doc Turtle is all about the snark.
I love me some Crusie. My hubby read both the Crusie/Mayer books and enjoyed them.
If I was going to recommend reading a random Ward book out of the Brotherhood series it would be the third book. Zsadist’s book is my favorite of them thus far.
For light and funny contemporary vampire I’d recommend Lynsay Sands. I really liked Single White Vampire and her take on the origins of vampire mythology is somewhat original.
AgTigress – I must concur, Charlie All Night was my fave Crusie ever. That might be because it was my first Crusie, and you never forget your first.
Anna Lawrence – please stop reading the Doc reviews. You’re giving us Annas a bad name.
I, too, would like to revisit to true intent of the Doc reviews. As I recall it was to have him reading romances (that are labeled as such) to prove that they can be a Darn Good read, not necessarily to choose what he would like to read.
I vote for Welcome To Temptation.
I would lov Doc Turtle to read some interesting historical romnaces. I’m thinking of:
Johanna Lindsey’s – Angel
Julie Garwood’s – Ransom (PLEASE!)
Judith McNaught’s – Something Wonderful.
These are just such wonderful romances, is what I think.
For something darker and disturbing, I would say something by Anne Stuart would be good.
Or perhaps Sandra Brown’s “Slow heat in heaven”.
I still say Brockmann, JD Robb or Wiggs (“The You I Never Knew” is on the RT list of 1001 favorite books)
Here I thought Anna was responding to my comments. I took it as we should read the good books before the craptastic.
Additional thoughts.
I do think DocTurtle should have some input simpy because he’s writing these reviews not just for the Smart Bitches website but for his website’s readership. I also think that if DocTurtle and the Smart Bitches got together and hammered out the criteria moving forward that we could come up with outstanding choices that are more targeted to an objective.
Yes, I’m anal that way. I don’t like to simply hit the nail with the hammer, I wanna pound that sucker in. And I’d really like us to choose books that are new enough that you can still buy them easily in a bookstore but old enough that you could get either from a used book store or the library. And I’d like to know in advance the book choice and perhaps an estimated starting date so I have time to acquire the book, read along and be able to snark on both websites (yes, I do need some (not a lot) lead time my reading is limited).
Although if wishes were horses, I’d really like the two sites to have joint commenting so the SB readership could snark with and engage the Judge a Book by its Cover readership.
You can bitch-slap me while I’m gone for the long comment.
Off to find something sapid to drink. (I got an honorable mention. That makes my day. It came upon the…)
I think Doc oughta go for JD Robb. Either that, or Lynn Viehl’s Darkyn series.
But is that series romance at all? I have read only one of them, but it certainly didn’t seem to be romance to me. I should have thought that any one of a long list of Nora Roberts writing as Nora Roberts would be more appropriate.
I cast another vote for Lord of Scoundrels, as well as a more typical Heyer (my personal fave has always been The Talisman Ring, but The Grand Sophy and Cotillion are also excellent examples of escalating lunacy. I’ve never cared for These Old Shades; I found the relationship between Avon and Leonie more creepy than romantic, though that’s evidently a minority opinion.) I haven’t read any Crusie except for her contributions to The Unfortunate Miss Fortunes, which I assume were the chapters about the video store employee who falls for a biker, as they were by far the funniest and best written. And my spamword is black52, which seems to be a subconscious vote for Decadent.
Lisa Kleypas!
I’m seeing quite a few votes for Lord of Scoundrels here!
Love it!
All: Wow…I’m overwhelmed by your suggestions…my head spins!
Let me pick one comment to respond to, AQ’s, just a few comments back.
First, let me say that after Heyer I don’t in fact intend to keep posting reviews on my wife’s (not my; sadly my blog is much much much more boring than hers and gets read much less frequently) blog. Were I to continue (and I would love to do so, and judging from many of y’all’s comments, there’s not a good deal of objection to it from these quarters) I would write reviews for SBTB exclusively.
Second, while I’d like to have some say in the matter of choosing my next read, I must profess profound ignorance of most of the authors and titles y’all have been bandying about. A few I recognize because they intersect my wife’s literary interests (either past or present), but most are by me at this time still indistinguishable from one another. I’m sure you’ll all set me to rights on that point in time, though.
As someone pointed out earlier in this thread, what I read next really depends on what you want out of me. If you want snark, send me to the dreck, and I’ll happily oblige. (My wife suggested that you set me loose on Twilight and let the sparks fly.) If you want enlightenment and an ongoing “masculine” perspective, send me to something worthwhile. I’ve got an open mind and am willing to take on just about anything, if y’all are willing (and I’m sure y’all are) to let me make an honest assessment of it.
Maybe SB Sarah can take a poll to figure out what y’all want out of me, and we can go from there?
By the way, I’m about ten pages from finishing Heyer. You’ll be delighted to know, perhaps, that I found the 88 straight pages of battle scenes the most godawfully boring bit of the book.
Greater love hath no man than this: that he lay down his sanity for his book review readers.
(I’m a Heyer addict and a history graduate with more than a passing interest in the battle. Even I found that part tough going.)
I say give him Gennita Low’s The Hunter. I would LOVE to hear his take on that one.
We want your wit, your joie de vivre, your je ne sais quoi of awesome.
(Not that we don’t get enough of that from Sarah and Candy, but the masculine voice, it is lacking. Except for the occasional pithy one-liners from their DHs.)
Would enjoy hearing your take on Twilight and the hermeneutics of the vampire romance oeuvre (aka love in the time of chelation).
I would love to hear his take on a one of Suzanne Brockmann’s novels because I think she has a nack for writing men that sound real. I wonder if a man would agree.
Crusie, definitely.
Fast Women or Faking It.
For Jennifer Crusie I would rec Welcome to Temptation or Faking It.
Also Singh’s Slave to Sensation would be good.
For Roberts/Robb-Northern Lights or Naked in Death
I’d vote Brockmann too, but perhaps one of her earlier seal books
I vote for a Nora Roberts novel…
Susan Elizabeth Phillips – Nobody’s Baby But Mine—it made me laugh out loud.
and he DEFINITELY has to rip a paranormal, I would love to see the snark on one of those. PHLEASE! (I’m sure the H is in the wrong place again)
I changed my mind. sic him on Twilight! I’m begging you! Emo werewolves, sparkly condescending teenagers in lurve! Go, Doc, let the snark begin!
Ditto! Not into the YA thing, plus I’d like to see the good Doc read a good romance, so Twilight doesn’t thrill me. But, honestly, I’ll be happy with whatever is decided. I am smitten!
My word is feet23. Maybe that’s the smell on the cover of Shiloh Walker’s book.
Or, maybe go old school with a Jennie Tremaine like Susie. That book makes me laugh out loud at least 5 or 6 times on purpose each and every time I have read it. And it is a category (Candlelight Sillouette, I believe).
I think Agnes and the Hitman would be a great choice. Ahh, Crusie.
For snark purposes we could send some She Who Will Not Be Mentioned. It’ll hurt like hell, but the snark would be amazing.
near92, yeah that many books should hold me for a day or two.
Books for DocTurtle to review not in any particular order. (I’m putting my whys in a separate post.
1. Lover Eternal by J. R. Ward
2. Welcome to Temptation by Jennifer Crusie
3. Angel’s Blood by Nalini Singh
4. Lord of Scoundrels by Loretta Chase
5. Forbidden Pleasures by Lora Leigh
6. Smooth Talking Stranger by Lisa Kleypas
7. And Then He Kissed Her by Laura Lee Guhrke
8. Virgin River by Robyn Carr
9. Black Ice by Anne Stuart
10. Nora Roberts: Something by Nora Roberts writing as Nora Roberts not JD Robb
Now the onto the whys:
1. Lover Eternal: Because to many readers the BDB books are like crack. I’ve read this one, not my cuppa. Didn’t read past this book in the series. Even so, I think that the book has some very interesting social commentary. What with the assimilation of a US music industry based culture, name brand dropping, females as pale imitations compared to men, etc. I’d like an outsider’s view of not only the story but possibly about why these books resonate with the romance readership. (I have my theories. Not that DocTurtle has to know why or even posit it, but he might observe something simply because he’s NOT a romance reader.) Regardless, the book is very snark worthy and I don’t believe this one’s been reviewed by the Smart Bitches.
2. Although this book has Fiction on the spine, it’s definitely concerned with the romantic relationship. Jennifer Crusie is a layer queen. There are so many layers, motifs and social commentary running through this book that I find it quite subversive. I like that in a book. And there’s more sex in it than Bet Me (also Fiction), the sex here actually moves the plot. Which isn’t to say that sex is necessary for DocTurtle ‘reading pleasure’ but that I think we should be making sure that the ‘dirty laundry’ card of the romance genre doesn’t get pushed to the background.
3. It isn’t released unreleased until March and it’s a new series so there’s no whether or not it’s a standalone. Fans state that Singh’s worldbuilding is spectacular in the Psy series. It should be interesting to see what she does in this new world. Mostly it will be a new release.
4. I know it’s up there on the top 100, but the reason I’d like this one reviewed is because I read Ryan Louis’s perspective on it via KatieBab’s blog. So I’d like to read the DocTurtle version.
5. Must have an erotic romance on the list and video of the college student reading aloud from it was priceless.
6. I saw Kleypas mentioned up above. This is released at the end of March and it’s a contemporary.
7. Cliches and rules abound.
8. Sweet & romantic. No suspense or paranormal.
9. Because romance readers always seem to have a reaction to her stories.
10. Because no romance reading list is complete without La Nora and although I consider the In Death series to have a strong romance subplot, I don’t regard them as strict romances.
One additional note: I’d like DocTurtle to keep his running commentary review format. I like that it’s done in pieces rather than as a giant review and I’d rather think of his post as more along the line of an event, than ‘just a review.’ Actually I miss the frequency of SB’s reviews. No matter. I’m happy that DocTurtle is willing review for SB exclusively.
In my experience, I have found that when trying to convince someone to read a romance, it’s more effective if you get that person intrigued with the plot of the story and the reasons why you liked it so much and why you want them to read it. Why don’t we make this a contest in which the person who is recommending a book tries in a creative way (haiku! palindromes!) to “sell” the idea to Doc Turtle and he can choose which option he found most attractive? I think that as much as we like certain books, if we keep assigning him what we want him to read because we love it and not what he might like in the genre, he will tire of doing this.