696. Holiday Wishes IV with Rae A, Josephine, and Sneezy

[intro]

Sarah Wendell: Hello, and welcome to episode number 696 of Smart Podcast, Trashy Books. I’m Sarah Wendell, and once again my guests are all of you. It is time for more Holiday Wishes. This week we are talking to Rae A, Josephine, and Sneezy, and we’re going to be talking about romance bookstores, road trips, luxurious bidets, webtoons, and of course books. We are traveling as far as Taiwan for this episode, and this should be the last of my laryngitis. Hurray for all of us.

I have a compliment this week, which makes me exceedingly happy.

To Joanne BB: You have a flawless internal compass. Not only do you know where you’re going or how to get out of the department store you just entered, but you know the kindest words and the most compassionate way of being.

If you would like a compliment of your very own, have a look at patreon.com/SmartBitches. Our Patreon community is the reason there are no dynamic ads before or after this show. With listener support I was able to turn off all dynamic ads, the ones you hear immediately before or after an episode, to avoid ads for ICE and other right-wing propaganda. So instead of Patreon offering ad-free episodes, our Patreon community made every episode free of dynamic ads for every listener. Thank you.

In addition, Patreon support helps me procure more episodes of Romantic Times, it keeps the show going, and helps ensure an artisan, handcrafted transcript from garlicknitter. Hey, garlicknitter! [Hey, Sarah! Hey, podcast readers! – gk] Your support means a lot, and if you would like a sample of the bonus content, there is a collection at Patreon of free bonus content for you to sample. And you can gift a membership. Did you know this? Patreon.com/SmartBitches/gift: there’ll be a link in the show notes should you wish to gift a Patreon membership.

And if Patreon support is not in the cards, may I please ask you to leave a review for this show wherever you listen.

Most of all, thank you for being here. I’m honored you’re listening.

And one more thing: there is still time to order from the Smart Bitches Candle Collection. Yes, I enjoy saying that. I partnered with Wax Cabin Candle Company, an independent small chandlery, to offer two limited-edition candles just for the holiday season. They are on sale now through early January 2026, and you can buy one or both in a gift set. The Smart Bitches 20th Anniversary Candle is an eleven-ounce, hand-poured soy candle with notes of sea salt, book pages, sandalwood, and jasmine. The Bad Decisions Book Club Candle, also eleven ounces, is designed to be the perfect pairing for late-night reading with scents of sweet tobacco, book pages, leather, rose, and sandalwood. I had a really good time picking out the scents, and I have been told they are fabulous. So if you are looking for the perfect gift for yourself or the book lovers in your life, there is a link in the show notes for the 2025 Smart Bitches Candle Collection. You can shop small and spread some light and warmth this year. And one more note: Wax Cabin Candle Company ships so fast, so you have time to order before the holidays. There’ll be a link in the show notes for you to find out more.

Support for this episode comes from Skims, who have new pajamas, and they are incredible. Most of my pajamas are old T-shirts and lightweight bottoms that I bought so long ago I, I don’t remember where they’re from or even how old they are. So when I received a Soft Lounge Sleep Set from Skims I thought, Oh, okay, pajamas! I have some; here are some more. Ha-ha! Nope, nope, nope, I was wrong. They’re so great I’m angry that they’re so great. The fabric is smooth, it is soft, but it’s not too thin or too thick. You know how some pajama fabric is so light, like, you can see through it? Not with these jammies. The Lounge Set is the exact right level of cozy. I have already thought of a few people I know who would love to have these, and gifting is going to be in the bag this year. The Deep Green color is beautiful. I kind of look Instagram-stylish, which is also a new experience for me. I’ve joked a few times that my overall aesthetic is Pajamas, But It Looks Like I Tried? The Soft Lounge Sleep Set is Pajamas That I Look Fabulous In, and I’m now planning which days I shall spend all day in the Skims Soft Lounge Sleep Set. Maybe the week between Christmas and New Years, when no one knows what day it is? Basically, as many days as possible, I’m going to be wearing these pajamas. You can shop my favorite pajamas at skims.com. After you place your order, please let them know we sent you. Select Podcast in the survey; be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows. And if you are looking for the perfect gifts for everyone on your list, the Skims holiday shop is now open at skims.com.

Thank you to Skims for supporting this episode, and thank you for supporting our advertisers!

Are you ready to get started with this episode? All right, let’s do it: Holiday Wishes Number Four! On with the podcast.

[music]

Sarah: Thank you for doing an interview!

Rae A: Yeah! Thank you for, like, opening this up to everybody, ‘cause this is one of the fun things to listen to at the end of the year when everything else is going deadline explosion!

Sarah: We’re just going to have the happiest, most joyful vibes for the rest of the year. I’m, like, super stoked –

Rae: Awesome!

Sarah: – about it.

Rae: I’m excited. My name is, online, is Rae A. The A is for Allie. I, so I was a reviewer for Heroes and Heartbreakers very briefly, so that’s the name that I used online so that the day job did not find my terrible habits. And I am located in central North Carolina!

Sarah: Well, hello there! Heroes and Heartbreakers! Oh my gosh, what a blast from the very recent past!

Rae: [Laughs] I know! It’s like, Hey, we died and put ourselves away because we’re not doing this anymore, and, like, I’m like, Okay! That’s not terrible, ‘cause – okay! It got weird at the end, but it, I think that happens.

Sarah: I love, like I deeply, like, I can’t even explain the depth of emotion how much I love when we’re looking at RT and there’s –

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: – all of these ads for the different publisher book blogs, and I’m like –

Rae: Right?

Sarah: – I miss you guys! I just, I miss all of you! I just need you to know. [Laughs]

Rae: Yeah. The one RT I went to they were very much like, Oh my God! Come find us and see us at these site, like, these, we’ll have these events! Please come talk to us and talk to our authors. And I was like, Yes! Totally going to be there! So, like, I got to go hang out, and I have some really great pictures of the one RT I went to in Atlanta, and…

Sarah: Oh, that was a good one!

Rae: – authors!

Sarah: You hit a good one, too! The Atlanta RT was fantastic!

Rae: Yeah! And your panel was fun, so that was exciting.

Sarah: Thank you. Was this the one where we ran around the room and took book recommendations?

Rae: Eventually? There was als-, there was a game that started it, and –

Sarah: I, I was doing games a lot too.

Rae: Yeah.

Sarah: Those are my favorites at RT, though! I loved the, I loved the sessions that were a game or interactive. Like –

Rae: So much more…

Sarah: – I don’t want to talk the whole time! That’s boring. Talk to me.

Rae: Right! Talk to me!

Sarah: I’m going to run around the room with a microphone like Phil Donahue and ask you about book recs.

Rae: [Laughs] I think we got there at the end, but we started with games and review-, and, like, panel discussions, so that was fun.

Sarah: Mm-hmm. Ah! Book blogs! And yet, still here.

Rae: Yep! [Laughs] It’s very exciting.

Sarah: It’s very exciting for me, let me tell ya.

So what book or books rocked your world this year?

Rae: So I’ve fallen into the romantasy world with everybody else –

Sarah: Ooh! Rrromantasy!

Rae: – and at the recommendation of one of my coworkers I read Quicksilver and then got very, very mad at her because it ends with a So here we are now! And this was back in March, and next week book two is releasing – or actually tomorrow, tomorrow night. God. [Laughs] So, like, back in March to tomorrow, and I’m just, like, waiting and waiting and waiting. So it’s like, yeah.

Sarah: I’m just envisioning all of these readers on the edge of a cliff with their fingertips, hanging off the edge. Like, you turn your readers into the cliffhangers.

Rae: Yep. It’s like, all right. Are we there? Are we there, are we there yet, are we there yet? So.

Sarah: Can I let go and read the next one? Can I let go?

Rae: Yeah.

Sarah: Are you going to reread the first book before you read the second?

Rae: Not only am I going to reread it, but I had to pick up a hard copy so that I could actually draw in all the notes? Because the book, when I initially read it, was from the library –

Sarah: Oh!

Rae: – and so –

Sarah: No writing in there!

Rae: – now – right? – so now I need to, like, read it for real and having my own copy because, while I do have a very nice Kindle –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Rae: – the fact that they started being like, So these are leases; you haven’t actually bought anything – freaks me a little bit out. So –

Sarah: I mean, fair. Absolutely fair.

Rae: So anything I want to actually keep I’m getting physical copies of. [Laughs]

Sarah: So the book that rocked your world –

Rae: Was Quicksilver.

Sarah: – was Quicksilver.

Rae: Yes.

Sarah: How much time have you devoted, like, how much time have you blocked off to read the sequel? Are you going to disappear? Are you going to go into witness protection?

Rae: I, so the kids are in school next week on Monday-Tuesday?

Sarah: [Laughs]

Rae: I am not? [Laughs]

Sarah: Excellent!

Rae: So there will be a, probably, like, full-on deep-dive reread of Quicksilver going through this week at a nice, leisurely fashion, and then I will probably read Brimstone and probably read Brimstone again. Or read both of them again, because there are some books where I have to immediately go, Wait a minute, wait a minute, ‘cause there’s things that happened, and now I have to go find it and go, Wait, this was – I remember this.

Sarah: I think that is an outstanding schedule for an anticipated book. Like, I will be thinking of you on Monday and Tuesday like, Go, go, go. This is great; go, go, go!

Rae: Yep.

Sarah: I am so excited that you have a new book. Like, I am so genuinely excited for you. [Laughs]

Rae: And, and I got a ticket to the midnight release at a local romance bookstore that is just opening.

Sarah: Oh, that’s so great! What bookstore? I will make sure to link to it.

Rae: It’s called Bright Side, I think? So this is in Raleigh, and they are, they’re calling their first one The Prologue, ‘cause it’s not their permanent space. But I will make sure to get you the link for it. ‘Cause they just had their grand opening like two weeks ago? For the, the, the Prologue space, and then they’re going to open, I think, in the spring. So yeah.

Sarah: Oh, that’s so exciting!

Rae: Yeah! And they’re starting to do author events and things like that, so it’s – yeah, Bright Side Books & Wine is the store.

Sarah: All you had to say was books and wine! Yep, got it! I, I, first of all, I love The Prologue.

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: We’re temporarily opening, and then we’re going to relocate. Number two –

Rae: Yeah.

Sarah: – pairing it with a wine bar? So smart.

Rae: Yeah.

Sarah: We need like a bus, like a bus road trip to go to as many as we can all across the country.

Rae: Funny enough, that leads into the thing that I put in my notes. So I am – mumble-mumble – almost fifty, and I saw this thing on Threads, probably, or Bluesky; I don’t remember which. But it was somebody talking about for their fiftieth an-, birthday, they were going to go to ten different bookstores and buy five books at every one, and then they’d have fifty books, and – for their fiftieth – and I said, I will take that idea! [Laughs]

Sarah: That is so clever! I love this so much! You, you made a note about this, and I’m so glad –

Rae: Yes.

Sarah: – that you did that, because I would not have known to ask you. This is such a great plan!

Rae: So, and I have a bunch of girlfriends that rave – like, I’ve got two good friends of mine that we get together like once a quarter and, like, one of them is inevitably at this lake house, and we spend the entire weekend reading and get together for food and then talk about what we’re reading and then go back to reading in our separate corners. But, like, I made a list of all the things I want to go see for bookstores. And so, like, Ripped Bodice is on there for both coasts; the Nora Roberts bookshop and B&B is on there.

Sarah: Turn the Page in Boonsboro. Are you going to stay at the B&B?

Rae: I don’t know!

Sarah: Okay.

Rae: I’m, I need to do all the research. So there’s all the research.

Sarah: Okay. I’m going to recommend the B&B to you for the following reason, and that reason is the toilets. Do you know about the toilets at the –

Rae: I do not know about the toilets.

Sarah: Okay. I’m just going to need you to hold onto your butt.

Rae: But I do have – hold on, I have to show you.

Sarah: Oh, please tell me!

Rae: When this came out and she did the event, and you had the Name the Next Room –

Sarah: Yes!

Rae: – I’m the one who won those books.

Sarah: You won the Name the Room contest? Oh my gosh!

Rae: When you did it on your website and with, for the stack of TBRs and everything that you picked up there?

Sarah: Oh, that’s so great!

Rae: [Laughs] So I’ve been listening to you –

Sarah: Oh my gosh!

Rae: – for a very long time.

Sarah: You have! Oh my God, I’ve never, I don’t know if I’ve really talked to one of a prize winners in a long time. That’s so great! Oh my gosh!

Rae: [Laughs]

Sarah: Okay, so let me tell you about the toilets in the Inns Boon-, Inn BoonsBoro: I was part of signing there a while ago with two other authors –

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: – and really, let’s be honest, if you’re going to a book signing at Turn the Page and it’s one of the Nora Roberts book signings – I think she does a couple a year –

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: – everyone’s coming to see Nora.

Rae: Yeah.

Sarah: Like, this is not a major event for you, but it’s a great event to be at, ‘cause you’re going to meet a lot of people, and a lot of people buy books.

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: But the crowd is out the door. In hourly shifts. People line up early in the morning. But if you’re an invited, if you are invited to sign, you get to stay in the Inn; they reserve a room for you so you have a space. So I stayed in the room, in the Inn. And I have two stories from this I will never forget.

One, there’s a ghost; it was in my room. It woke me up and helped me meet people who then I had a wonderful weekend with, so I’m a big fan of the ghost in the Inn, Inn BoonsBoro. Lovely ghost wanted me to make friends; I’m totally in favor of this.

The toilets: these are Japanese toilets. They are from Toto. They have a heated seat and an automatic lid, and when you walk into the bathroom the lid goes up, very, very dignified, Hello!

Rae: [Laughs]

Sarah: And then if you leave it very, closes very slowly. Okay, maybe another time. And you walk back in and the lid goes up. The seat is heated. There is a front bidet. There is a back bidet. There is a dryer. This is the most luxurious use of the toilet you will ever have. And I checked into my room and I went to the book signing, and I’m like, Nora, the toilet! She’s like, Oh my God, isn’t it great? And I’m like, Nora, the toilet! And I’m telling the other people, and they haven’t, like, they don’t believe me. And then some people were hanging out after; I’m like, Let’s go out on the deck outside my room. We’ll drink wine and we’ll hang out! So we’re hanging out, and I’m like, All of you need to use the toilet in my room. And they’re like, Are you sure? I’m like, Yes, yes, yes, you do. You need to –

Rae: You need to! [Laughs]

Sarah: So we’re sitting outside; I have a little balcony door. First, first person goes in, they come out, and they are, like, wide-eyed. And they’re like, Oh my God! And I’m like, I know, right? And someone else is like, I don’t even have to use the toilet and I think I have to use the toilet. Like, drink more wine! You will have to use the toilet! They go in; they come out. Oh my God! And I’m like, Yeah, I know! The toilet is amazing! It’s like the greatest experience of your life! So then Nora comes over to see how we’re doing, and we’re like, Nora, the toilet! She’s like, I know!

Rae: I know!

Sarah: So for my eleventh wedding anniversary my mother-in-law took the kids, and we had like zero plans, and I decided, All right, if there’s room at the Inn BoonsBoro, we’re going to drive from Jersey down to Boonsboro just so my husband can use the toilet, and the only – [laughs] – the only room that was available was the bridal suite, which I think is Titania and Oberon, so we’re like, Great, this is awesome!

And it is truly life-changing, and now I have those toilet seats in my house. We installed them in 2020 because we couldn’t travel, and we’re like, All right, we’re going to upgrade –

Rae: We’re going to spend this money.

Sarah: If we’re going to all be in the house and there’s a toilet paper shortage, here’s what we’re doing. I have these in my house because of the Inn BoonsBoro. Now, I believe there’s a full, like, the full commode. I just have a –

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: – the seat.

Rae: Seat.

Sarah: Truly, truly, it is worth the experience of staying there. (A) Meet the ghost; she’s great. (B) The toilets. That’s really why you need to go: the toilets.

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: So trust me. Trust me. I want to hear back. If you have stayed, I want to hear back what you think.

Rae: Okay.

Sarah: Okay. And the room where I was in where the ghost was waking me up, I want to say it was Elizabeth and Darcy. It’s a front-facing room on the second floor. I believe that’s where the ghost is pretty active.

So where, what other bookstores are you going to hit? This is such a great idea.

Rae: So because we’re going to do Ripped Bodice Brooklyn, we’re also going to do The Drama Book Shop –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Rae: – and Strand –

Sarah: Oh, of course.

Rae: – in New York City.

Sarah: Of course.

Rae: Then – we were, we were having fun with this, and of course, because day job is product management?

Sarah: Ha!

Rae: This means –

[Laughter]

Rae: – there might be a spreadsheet.

Sarah: I’m, I was going to say, there’s a, there’s a spreadsheet and an Airtable, aren’t, isn’t there?

Rae: Yeah. It is –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Rae: And it’s grouped by, like, geographic city so that I can tell my girlfriends who are all about the same age, I was like, Okay, pick what city you want to join me for.

Sarah: I love it!

Rae: Because then it’s a thing, and we just go and have fun.

Sarah: Okay. That is so fantastic! I hope you –

Rae: Yep.

Sarah: – document every part of it.

Rae: I, I plan to. So Love’s Sweet Arrow’s on here.

Sarah: Yep.

Rae: Montgomery & Taggert.

Sarah: Yep.

Rae: Politics and Prose, which is apparently in DC and comes highly rated as a place to go do things.

Sarah: It’s okay! Their, their romance section isn’t robust, but it is a centerpiece of DC. If you are going to be in DC, though, East –

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: – East City Bookshop is great, they are lovely, and there is a romance bookstore; it is in Alexandria. Alexandria is across the river from DC, so if you’re going to be in DC, you’re going to want to go to Friends to Lovers.

Rae: Okay!

Sarah: You can take the Metro there. You don’t, it’s not like, Oh my gosh, it’s in Virginia. No, it’s, like, right across the river.

Rae: Okay.

Sarah: It’s the DC sub-, very close DC suburb part of Virginia. Friends to Lovers is fantastic.

Rae: And then, let’s see, what else is on here? A place called the Wild Rumpus is a kids bookstore, so not romance, but it sounds fricking adorable. The Book Loft, which is apparently one of the best used-book stores in the world; it’s also conveniently in Columbus, which is where my best friend lives, so that’s really easy. There’s one on here called The Last Bookstore? And apparently because the pictures of it were amazing.

Sarah: I mean, why not?

Rae: Right.

Sarah: Bookstore owners have gotten so smart about making the space a visual destination?

Rae: Yep.

Sarah: Like, you don’t want to just be there; you want to show people that you are there, because it is so, like –

Rae: Right.

Sarah: – there is a mural on the wall at Friends to Lovers, and it’s gorgeous. Like, the whole store is just adorable. I did an event there and I was like, Can I just move in?

Rae: [Laughs]

Sarah: I’ll be out of the way. [Laughs]

Rae: And then I jokingly put Foyles book shop on here because it’s in London, but it, the pictures were astounding?

Sarah: [Laughs]

Rae: The last place is actually Boston Public Library for the sole reason of Mari Carr and Lila Dubois have really told me on having to go see this place? ‘Cause I don’t know – [laughs] – they wrote Masters’ Admiralty and Trinity Masters? And the Trinity Masters is the US version? And their secret base is in the basement of Boston Public Library.

Sarah: Oh wow!

Rae: So, yeah. So it’s one of those Not sure I’m going to get there, but could be fun.

Sarah: That’s fantastic! First of all, I am fifty.

Rae: Mm-hmm?

Sarah: The five in the front is fucking awesome. Be ye not afraid! It is dope.

Rae: It is kind of fantastic, ‘cause it’s one of those things I, the – I think I actually heard it first on you: the number of fucks that you give –

Sarah: Oh yes! [Laughs]

Rae: …drastically drops?

Sarah: Oh yes, exponentially. Have like a third of a fuck for the whole year.

Rae: Exactly, and I’m like, I, I have to hoard those, so sometimes they get spent on things like, Hi, you have a job, and you have to earn money –

Sarah: Oh God.

Rae: – so yes, you will give fucks over here.

Sarah: Yep.

Rae: But that means you are drastically limited beyond that.

Sarah: Yep!

Rae: …can summon the will to live without.

Sarah: I honestly think that a major component of aging and maturity is just figuring out what you actually have to care and spend energy on.

Rae: Right?!

Sarah: I have trimmed my list of things that I give a fuck about to a very manageable level. I think that’s the best part of aging; you gain the perspective to be like, Does this actually matter? Yes/no.

Rae: Is it going to impact the world? Maybe my small portion, but that’s about it? Okay.

Sarah: Yep.

Rae: I will care at this level, ‘cause that’s the appropriate level.

Sarah: So what are your wishes for 2026 for everybody?

Rae: I would like it so that people have the brain space to do what they want to do and focus where they want to focus. Because I, like, I have a chart of, like, my reading, and everything’s been rereading.

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Rae: Like, so much of my reading this year has been rereading, ‘cause I don’t have the brain space to go find new. And –

Sarah: No! ‘Course not!

Rae: – I don’t, like, there’s stuff at work; there’s stuff in the world; there’s stuff with kids. I don’t, I don’t have the space! And I want 2026, for me and for everybody else, to have the space to be able to go experience new or focus where they want.

Sarah: Yes. I think a lot of rereading is up this year simply because our brains are so tired. We can’t do all the initial construction work of a new world.

Rae: Mm-hmm!

Sarah: Or I, I also think that there’s a relation to the fact that books are really, really long right now? Like, if you love a good seven-hundred-page book, more power to you. That is not for me? But once you enter that world, you could be in it for a good old long –

Rae: Hey!

Sarah: Exactly! You can be in that world for days and days!

Rae: Yeah! Like, some of the things that I’ve been reading that have been new are maybe a hundred and fifty pages, two hundred pages?

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Rae: And unfortunately full of tropes and knitted together as if that’s a plot? But it’s mind candy. It’s like, yep! I’m getting here and it’s different. Okay, but I know these beats, and I like how you’re knitting it together; this is fine.

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Rae: But, like, I want to be able to read the next big, giant book that is going to have huge worldbuilding and be able to immerse myself in it without being pulled out because the world was on fire this week for whatever reason.

Sarah: I notice that when I try to really get into a book, sometimes my brain cannot relax.

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: Did something happen? Did something happen? Did something happen?

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: That’s exhausting! My brain could not settle.

Rae: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: It’s hard when your brain can’t settle. So yeah, give it all the candy it wants! Really luxuriate. Like, I love that idea that everyone would get a book this year to luxuriate in.

Rae: Right?

Sarah: Yes! Books like a bathtub. One good one that never gets cold. [Laughs]

Rae: Exactly. The nice slipper tub style.

Sarah: Yes!

Rae: Where it’s got the back support and a pillow.

Sarah: That’s another point in favor of the Inn BoonsBoro, by the way: the bathtubs are great too. Nora does not fuck around with her plumbing, let me tell you. If anyone – suppose into the far, far future, you know, Nora Roberts has ascended to the Great Library in the sky –

Rae: [Laughs]

Sarah: – and someone asks me for a quote about her, I have many things to say, but top among them is that she has out-fucking-standing taste in plumbing fixtures. I will never be as good at her as plumb-, at plumbing fixture arrangement and selection. It is, it is an art; trust me.

Rae: Yep.

Sarah: You deserve it.

Did you bring a, a joke? It is okay if you didn’t.

Rae: I did. This one’s actually courtesy of the fifteen-year-old.

Sarah: Hell yeah! That’s the best kind!

Rae: So, what is the difference between a liter of butane and a liter of air?

Sarah: What is a di-, what is the difference between a liter of butane and a liter of air? What?

Rae: Air is something you can breathe, and butane, well, it’s just a little bit of a lighter fluid.

Sarah: [Laughs] Some- – [laughs more] – thank you. That’s a good one. Please, please, please thank your fifteen-your-old for that; that was dope.

Rae: Yep.

Sarah: And thank you for signing up to do an interview. I really appreciate it.

Rae: You’re welcome. This was fun!

[music]

Josephine: Hey, I am Josephine in the Discord, and I am in Maryland!

Sarah: So what book or books rocked your world this year?

Josephine: So the one I want to talk about – I of course had, you know, a hundred books that I wanted to squee about, but I, I narrowed it down. I’ve got one book, and if it’s okay I have one fanfiction.

Sarah: You can do both, and if you want to add a third book, that’s cool too!

Josephine: [Laughs] I went with what can I feel like I can speak well to, rather than just, like, rambling.

Sarah: Squee! Yes, got it. All right.

Josephine: So How to Find a Nameless Fae by A. J. Lancaster. It was published this past summer. It is a fabulous little book – not so little. You know, romance novel length.

Sarah: Mm.

Josephine: It’s a Rapunzel retelling? But it’s from the point of view of the forty-year-old princess who has lived under the first-child curse her entire life, and she is done. So she takes matters in her own hands and goes and finds the wicked sorcerer, and what she finds is a magic house and a talking cat and a cozy garden and a whole adventure involving finding a name. And it is lovely, and I am, I apologize if my work computer gives those dings.

Sarah: It’s okay. So this sounds like Rumpelstiltskin.

Josephine: It, sorry! I said Rapunzel, and I meant Rumpel-, Rumpelstiltskin.

Sarah: That’s okay! Don’t worry about it.

Josephine: It’s lovely, like I said. A lot of coziness. There, there’s a big side, subplot about creating community that is just absolutely lovely. It was literally everything I needed this summer when I read it.

Sarah: Oh!

Josephine: It’s my favorite book that I read this year.

Sarah: I love that! That is so great. Thank you for the rec!

Josephine: Yeah! And then the author, A. J. Lancaster, is a Kiwi. She’s from New Zealand, and so there’s these great little, like, New Zealand references here and there in the fae realm. They’re really fun.

Sarah: I love when there are very specific cultural references? Like, it’s very cool! It adds, it adds, like, not just place, but it adds impact to the whole worldbuilding.

Josephine: Mm-hmm, for sure. Where a northern hemisphere writer might have, like, a raven or a crow or a mockingbird, she uses tuis? Which are mischievous, yes. The New Zealand version thereof, which is pretty fabulous.

Sarah: I love this so much. What a great rec! And you said you wanted to recommend a fanfiction.

Josephine: Yes. It’s called Backhoe by – and I’m going to get this pronunciation terrible – ZenaidaMacroura is the username on Archive of Our Own? I can send you the link in the Discord if you want, Sarah.

Sarah: Please do!

Josephine: But it is a Marvel alternate universe where art student and activist Steve Rogers goes on an activism trip to a pipeline protest in Appalachia and winds up chained to a backhoe with local boy Bucky Barnes –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Josephine: – and it is a hundred and twenty-five thousand words of just amazing characterization and just – it’s so well done! The characters feel so real? Like they’re somebody that I could meet in, next week or somebody that my friend was telling me about. It’s also really well done talking about activism and a lot of how that works and really great stuff about Appala-, Appalachia and Appalachian culture which is truly lovely.

There’s a hilarious scene where somebody is trying to, where somebody has to, like, basically translate between the New York accent, Steve’s New York accent, and Bucky’s very strong, like, southern West Virginia accent.

Sarah: [Laughs]

Josephine: Amazing. But that bit live, like, it ate an entire week of my life this year –

Sarah: At that length, I –

Josephine: – between the hundred-and-twenty-five-thousand-word main fic and then all, of course, the side fics about various characters, many of whom are Marvel characters. Absolutely lovely and well done, and yeah, I, I just – it still lives in my head months later.

Sarah: So they took a lot of the Marvel universe and the interpersonal conflict and they put it in Appalachia. Incredible. That, I’m, like, I’m so delighted. I am entirely delighted, because it’s like, oh, this is what I love about fanfic.

Josephine: And it’s a successful action, too, in a very realistic way, which makes it even better.

Sarah: I love it! Oh, God, thank you!

Josephine: I’m not going to give away how, but, like, I needed to know that, like, sometimes this works. [Laughs]

Sarah: I love this. This is such a great rec. Thank you! I love when people, when people bring fanfic to the Holiday Wishes episodes; it’s so fun?

Josephine: My pleasure. My pleasure.

Sarah: So what wishes do you have for 2026?

Josephine: I wish people moments of joy, particularly moments of joy that bring light into the dark months. Whether that’s dark as in it gets dark at 4:30 or –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Josephine: – dark as in things feel really dark right now.

Sarah: Yes!

Josephine: [Laughs] So that is my wish for everyone for 2026.

Sarah: That is a good wish. I just noticed recently, like when I power down and leave, I have to go turn lights on because it’s dark, and I’m like, Ohhh! I forgot about this part. This sucks!

Josephine: This is, this is a tough part of the year for me. Yeah.

Sarah: It is a hard part!

Josephine: I’m finding that light wherever I can, whether it’s literal or metaphorical.

Sarah: Oh yeah. I am back on my candle bullshit like you would not believe. And I’ll, I will tell you something: so next week I have a special candle launch coming. I have a Bad Decisions Book Club and a Smart Bitches 20th Anniversary set of candles coming from Wax Cabin Candle Company.

Josephine: Amazing! I am so excited?

Sarah: I know, and I got a special coupon for all the Patreon and After Dark folks. So you guys get two dollars off, yes.

Josephine: Amazing! So my husband has picked up the Bad Decisions Book Club terminology.

Sarah: [Laughs]

Josephine: Any time he comes to bed and I’m still awake, ‘cause he usually comes to bed later than me, he goes, Oh, are we having Bad Decisions Book Club?

Sarah: [Laughs] I – [still laughing] – can’t stop –

Josephine: I’m spreading, I’m spreading the word.

Sarah: You know what? I appreciate it. Tell your husband, Yes, yes, we are, all the time. Because, I mean, I love sleep? But there are times when I want to be awake and in this book more than I want to be asleep, and those are very important times.

Josephine: Oh yes, absolutely. And for the record, both of my recs were Bad Decisions Book Club –

Sarah: Hell yeah!

Josephine: – moments for me, so.

Sarah: Did you bring a bad joke? It is okay if you did not.

Josephine: I did.

Sarah: Yay!

Josephine: This is also from my husband, who is a specialist in bad jokes.

So everyone this time of year starts making a really big deal about their news, New Year’s resolutions and what they’re going to change, but I think for me, for 2026, I’m just going to stick by 1920 by 1080 for my monitor size.

Sarah: [Laughs] Little itty-bitty screen. Oh, that’s funny. Thank you! And please thank your husband. Should I thank him by name?

Josephine: Sure! It’s Jay.

Sarah: I will add that to my show notes. Thank you, Jay! Brilliant!

Thank you so much for doing this. These are such a delight –

Josephine: Yeah!

Sarah: – and I love talking to everybody. And thank you for joining us on our crafty Zooms!

Josephine: Oh, I love the crafty Zooms so much. It always makes me really happy when they work with my schedule.

Sarah: I’m going to keep trying to make them as accessible to everybody, even though everyone is all over the planet. Thank you so much, and thank you for doing an interview. This, this totally makes my year, and I love these episodes, so thank you for being part of them.

Josephine: Yeah, me too! My pleasure. I love these too, Sarah. Thank you for doing Smart Bitches and for bringing a little bit more light into the world.

Sarah: I try every day. That’s the whole goal.

[music]

Sneezy: Hello, all and sundry! I am Sneezy from Boba Land –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: – aka Taiwan, purveyor of bubble tea! Among other things.

Sarah: I love how you’re like, I live in Boba Land; that’s where I live.

Sneezy: [Laughs] Listen, I’m milking it for as long as I’m here!

Sarah: I don’t blame you! I mean, that’s a really good thing to be excited about. I mean, boba – listen, Taiwan is in a tense position. Celebrate the boba! Celebrate it!

Sneezy: Right! Like, I, I’m, I’m in this, like, weird space where I am at once, like, purposely living under a rock and then being like, Maybe I shouldn’t live under a rock, as I’m having bubble tea, like, I don’t know, man, but it just feels nice to just vibe sometimes! [Laughs]

Sarah: No, listen, listen, take it from me: vibe, vibe, vibe, vibe hard. Vibe very hard all of the time!

So I always ask, tell me: what book or books rocked your world this year? Tell me everything.

Sneezy: Okay, I’m going to do something a little bit cheeky. [Laughs] But, but in my defense there’s only three! There’s only three. I, I was good; I was good…cheeky bit.

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: But I was…

Sarah: There’s only three – I’m very proud, actually; well done.

Sneezy: [Laughs] Thank you! It was hard! Nobody understands what it’s like to be a small cat in this world!

Sarah: I do! [Laughs]

Sneezy: So I would like to, first, a webtoon. I know it’s a surprise to everyone. [Laughs] Only Hope: the author’s name is CHOSNG? I can’t tell if this is meant to be a Korean word plus, like, an initial at the end? But the, the number of consonants makes me think it’s not just, like, a name-name, but anyway. That, that’s – I will send a link.

I have mentioned this before in Whatcha Reading? I think I was about to, like, plug this into, to the one this week as well. And it’s just, it’s not my usual vibe, I will say. It’s more thriller than Sneezy can usually handle, but there’s also, like, a lot of cute moments and then it’s like time travel and it’s aggression and, you know, if you go back in time by dying, does that mean that the timeline you left continues, or, or does everything reset?

Sarah: Oh, that’s a really hard time travel question. I don’t know if I’ve seen that, like, explored anywhere!

Sneezy: I don’t know if they will explore it – oh, hello, cat! Hello!

Sarah: That’s Wilbur. He wants his dinner.

Sneezy: Oh, hello! Hello, orange baby! I love you! [Laughs]

Sarah: So in this webtoon – I’m looking at the summary – so in this webtoon, this woman is married, and she finds a hidden basement in his villa. She finds the secret, the house goes up in flames, and she’s killed by a mysterious man. Then she wakes up nine years in the past on the day that she would meet her would-be husband –

Sneezy: Mm-hmm.

Sarah: – and she has to figure out what is her husband’s secret, who did the killing, and what choices is she going to make?

Sneezy: Okay. I, I want people to love this webtoon as much as me, so I’ll just do a, a small spoiler! It’s like literally the first chapter, so it doesn’t really count. The secret is that her husband is a murderer.

Sarah: Oh crap! That’s not great!

Sneezy: Right, and he is –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: – slightly ritualistic about it, slightly sadistic about it. He recorded himself doing that shit, and he goes, Ah, I shouldn’t have killed him so fast. By killing him so fast means burning him alive! Said victim. So.

Sarah: So her husband – now not her husband – is bad news. She, so she basically gets a do-over –

Sneezy: Mm.

Sarah: – to figure out him and her.

Sneezy: Right.

Sarah: No, no pressure! Low stakes! Very low stakes. Very, very –

Sneezy: Uh-huh.

Sarah: – low stakes.

Sneezy: Uh-huh.

Sarah: I can see why this really grabbed you.

Sneezy: Yes.

Sarah: There’s so much there. Oh my God!

Sneezy: There’s, there’s, like, a lot more, and I’m stopping myself from being like, Oh, and then there’s thing and this thing, but that’s like the first ten chapters, so it doesn’t really count as spoiler – okay, I’m going to stop. You all know he’s a murderer now! You all go on and go see and be like, If possibly evil – we haven’t decided yet – why hot? Everybody is, is like really attractive in the webtoon and, and all those things, and – [laughs]

Sarah: If evil, why sexy?

Sneezy: Yes! Yes, exactly!

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: And it’s like, I’m trying to live in my values and morals. If you’re going to be evil, I need you to not – what’s the word? – not, not, not alert my libido of your existence. [Laughs]

Sarah: So what is your second book or webtoon that you have brought for this year? I’m so excited, ‘cause your choices are always so interesting.

Sneezy: Thank you! Second one is neither! Ha-ha, bet you didn’t see that coming! It is –

Sarah: Nope, sure didn’t!

Sneezy: – a podcast!

Sarah: Ooh, what podcast?

Sneezy: It is a D&D live roleplay podcast, World Beyond, it’s called World Beyond Num-, Worlds Beyond Number – I know how to talk, honest – and it is, the story in particular, there’s, there’s, like, smaller stories that you can get, and sometimes they put them in public, sometimes they have them behind their, their Patreon, but the main story is The Wizard, The Witch & The Wild One, and it’s a podcast – anyone who’s into, like, live play D&D probably already know what I’m about to stay: Brennan Lee Mulligan, Erika Ishii, Aabria Iyengar, and Lou Wilson, they’re the players, and then it’s scored by Taylor Moore, and it is just the most beautiful, like – like, you remember how audio plays and radio plays used to be a thing?

Sarah: Yes!

Sneezy: It has a lot of that vibe, right, because of the way it’s scored, right, and then the acting and then the, the sound editing. It’s just, it’s, it’s insanely beautiful! It is, it’s, it is a beautiful story.

Sarah: Oh, I love it!

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: I love it!

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: That’s fantastic.

Sneezy: Yeah, and, like, it is, it is like the kind of, like, queer, nerdy, and, and diverse kind of mix I, I really have been looking for in live D&D roleplay, because obviously, like, in nerd spaces you don’t always get that! Right, and, and not, nothing against, you know, the, the people who are, like, trying to bring that into, into their work, like, but it’s just like, okay, but this is already here, and it’s, it’s just that kind of – [sighs] – feeling of, like, I don’t have to, like, wait for the shoe to drop sort of feeling.

Sarah: Yep!

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: I understand completely.

Sneezy: Yeah, and also, let this be on the record, okay?

Sarah: Okay.

Sneezy: If Aabria Iyengar’s partner ever leaves her, I am first in line. I will take –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: – no contest. I am so, I, I thirst for this woman. She’s just so smart, and she’s so generous as both a player and as a DM, and she’s just – ah! [Sighs]

Sarah: So let it be declared that Aabria is officially your number one crush.

Sneezy: [Laughs] Maybe?

Sarah: Understood.

Sneezy: Who’s to say?

Sarah: Maybe?

Sneezy: Okay –

Sarah: Who’s to say? I mean, there could be a ranking; who knows?

Sneezy: [Laughs]

Sarah: So what next, girl? What next?

Sneezy: Oh, okay. This one, this is the cheeky one, because it’s the book I’m most looking forward to, and it is – it’s not a new book. It’s Baroness Elsa by Irene Gamwell, uh, uh, Gamnel – sorry – G-A-M-M-E-L. Gammel? Gammel? I hope I’m saying that right. And it is about Elsa von Freytag-Loringhoven.

Sarah: Mm-hmm!

Sneezy: And she was a, Elsa, Baroness Elsa was a prominent artist during the Dada movement, and despite being technically a baroness she lived in poverty and struggled immensely with mental health for basically her entire life, or at least during her career as an artist, and passed away unfortunately young. It was unclear whether it was because of a suicide or because of an accident, but it, but she struggled with mental health either way. And it’s kind of an open secret that the Fountain credited to Duchamp is her work!

Sarah: Wait, what? No way!

Sneezy: Uh-huh, yes way.

Sarah: No kidding! Wait, hold on. Yes, I understand; shocking isn’t it?

Sneezy: [Laughs]

Sarah: I know!

Sneezy: Wilbur is also very interested.

Sarah: He’s, he’s very, very – so the, the, the basic, like, water fountain shape kind of looks like a, kind of looks like a personal –

Sneezy: Like a urinal, yes.

Sarah: Looks like a urinal…that was her! Oh my goodness!

Sneezy: Right. It’s kind of an open secret? ‘Cause there’s just too many things that indicate it was her, and the artwork makes a lot more sense if she’s the one that made it, because Duchamp, his whole thing was just like, Oh yeah, I was, like, exploring the boundaries of art and what we think of as art, and there wasn’t really anything of substance? But –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Sneezy: – if you understand that it’s something that, that she made, then okay! So R. Mutt, Richard Mutt was already an alias she was using –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Sneezy: – and the, the way, the, the, the letters, the signing of it, like, it matches her handwriting that we have!

Sarah: Really! Oh –

Sneezy: And it’s like, What artist will tell someone else to sign their work for them?

Sarah: Aren’t art mysteries fun?

Sneezy: So fun!

Sarah: Like –

Sneezy: And, like, you know, like, you’re, you’re, okay, I’m supposed to say, Well, technically we don’t really know? No, we know. We know. And, and –

Sarah: In your opinion, this is Baroness Elsa’s work.

Sneezy: Yes.

Sarah: Tell me the name of the book again? Is it called Baroness Elsa?

Sneezy: Yes.

Sarah: So this is Baroness Elsa: Gender, Dada, and Everyday Modernity.

Sneezy: Yes.

Sarah: There, just a little light reading about Dadaism. Sure!

Sneezy: Mmm! Yeah.

Sarah: I love it!

Sneezy: Right? It strikes me as, like, from what I’ve read so far it’s not, it’s not, like, super heavy. You don’t have to have like a doctorate in art history to enjoy it, because it’s meant for people to understand why it makes more sense for the Fountain to be attributed to her, and also how, like, women have always had a place in art, and it’s not that, it’s not just that we need to make space for women in art, it’s also that we need to, like, fucking notice them and not take away their work? Right. Duchamp waited until she was dead, right, and people have mostly forgot she did this thing to say, Oh yes, it was me. Like, it might have been misattributed to him while she was alive, but he waited until, like, she has passed away for a few years to be like, That was totally me! Yes, you can make reproductions. You’re welcome!

Sarah: [Laughs] And it’s not that we, we need to necessarily make space for women artists. We do. We need to foster and encourage women artists. We need to recognize in the past the space that they already occupied –

Sneezy: Yes.

Sarah: – that we never, that we never acknowledged. I –

Sneezy: Right!

Sarah: – I completely agree. Absolutely true.

Sneezy: Yeah, and, like, okay, here’s, here’s one more. This was also a common misconception, so I, I feel valid for mentioning this – [laughs] – just slipping it in.

[Laughter]

Sneezy: And we also need to fucking listen to women when they’re telling us about their art? Like, yes, art is also up for interpretation, and the, the connection viewers have with art, like, that’s all valid and blah-blah, and also, when an artist tells you, Hey! My giant flower paintings are not of a vagina –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: – don’t, don’t just say, Well, it doesn’t matter what you say. Like –

Sarah: Mmm.

Sneezy: – let that be part of the art too! Like, Oh, well, I saw lots of pretty vaginas, and great! I love vaginas too. Trust me! But!

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: But that, but it doesn’t have to be the whole thing. And the artist I’m talking about, some of you might have already picked up, Georgia O’Keeffe. Right, she drew those, she painted these huge paintings of flowers, right.

Sarah: Yeah, of course!

Sneezy: Right! And she was also responding to modernity. She lived in a city, and she did a few different artworks, sort of exploring, like, the hustle and bustle, and she was also really inspired by the flowers she saw planted along the sidewalks or, or, like, the one that would come up through, through the concrete or whatever. The point is, she would draw these immense paintings telling people to pause, to stop, to notice beautiful things and don’t get lost up in, like, the sweep of the city. Don’t, don’t just get swept along! Like, move about intentionally! Breathe! See these beautiful things! That was the intention. But all of these men, all these meaning-makers of the day said – including her creative partner at the time, I think? – all said, Well, we all said it’s vagina, so it’s vagina now, and it’s such an entrenched misconception. You get people in art history or just in, in whatever, like, formal art thing, right –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Sneezy: – who also continue to believe, Oh, well, it was well established that, that’s about vagina because all these art, art historians said so; all of these art critics said so at the time; and duh-duh-duh-duh-duh. Like, I remember when I was in high school I did a, a presentation on her, and I, you know, I just said, Oh yeah, and then the book said it’s, she, she wasn’t trying to paint vaginas, and then everyone, including the teacher, went, No! It’s well established that these are vaginas, and they were very confused where I would, like, where I got that, and I was very confused, like, Oh, well, did I, like, misremember? ‘Cause it’s that thing where, like, everybody was saying the same thing, including someone you saw as an authority, was supposed to know more than you, and, and you start to doubt yourself. No-, nothing against my art teacher at the time, by the way; as I said, this was a deeply entrenched misconception, right.

Sarah: Oh, it’s a very entrenched misconception, of course!

Sneezy: Yeah! So yeah. Like, women have been doing art this whole time, and the way we show up and make space for women is not just, Oh, here’s an, here’s a cute little newbie that I don’t have to really think about what she’s saying or if, if she’s, like, contributing anything. I can just be like, Oh, here, I, I have given you a corner somewhere; I’ve done my bit. The end. Like, part of showing up for women as artists, I think, is definitely treating them as artists –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Sneezy: – right? Not just, like, I presume you have a vagina; therefore, the end. Like, they might not –

Sarah: It’s very –

Sneezy: – have vaginas…

Sarah: There are a lot of very famous painters who are male who do not have their work flattened into It’s All Vaginas. Now, if she had been, gone out and been like, Yes, these are all vaginas and they’re all different? That is one thing, but if you just flatten it into, Yeah, they’re all vags –

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: – like, yay, vags. Okay, great! But, like, there’s more than that.

Sneezy: Yeah, exactly!

Sarah: Thank you for these recommendations. I’m very curious about the Baroness Elsa one; that’s very cool.

Sneezy: Right? Me too! I, I am – ohhh! – this is why I’m looking forward to this. Just to be cheeky I’ll say, Oh, this is the book I’m most looking forward to in the New Year! No, I’m reading this now. [Laughs]

Sarah: Good! Excellent! That’s cool!

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: What are your wishes for everyone in 2026?

Sneezy: Oh man, I couldn’t, I co- – oh, God – I, I, I couldn’t decide. I was still woozling around trying to think – okay: I wish everyone gets adopted by the cat that chooses them. There, there is an orange cat that’s, like, running around my neighborhood, and –

Sarah: Mm-hmm.

Sneezy: – for an orange cat, they’re very wily and very, like, quick on the uptake, and I have promised myself if I get to pick up that cat and bring the cat into my building, that will be my cat.

Sarah: Mmm.

Sneezy: The cat heard me talking to myself in my head, which I don’t know how it happened, because, again, this is an orange cat. But I’m just saying I hope everyone gets the Cat Distribution System, because I want it. [Laughs] Therefore let’s all have it!

And eczema fucks off, fascism fucks off. What else?

Sarah: Oh, yes, please! Thank you, yes.

Sneezy: Yeah, and just, you know, hey, surprise, everyone! Killing people is bad! And killing lots of people is the bad. Apparently that’s news to some people, so I guess my wish is for everyone to fucking learn that? Like –

Sarah: Mmm.

Sneezy: – yesterday? But I’ll take –

Sarah: Yes.

Sneezy: – tomorrow –

Sarah: That’s –

Sneezy: – as long as they learn it ASAP.

Sarah: No pressure! No pressure!

Sneezy: No – listen, I’m in my, like, I’m Done With This Shit Asian auntie era? Like, I might be evolved enough to know not to beat children, but I’m not evolved enough to think beating in general is bad. Don’t fucking test me.

Sarah: I get it. [Laughs] Yeah!

So did you – [coughs] – excuse me – did you bring a joke? It is okay if you did not.

Sneezy: I did not this time.

Sarah: That is okay…worries.

Sneezy: [Laughs] People who I feel are, like, very self-possessed and self-confident and self-aware, I feel like, you know, they’re, they’re just very comfortable liking what they like.

Sarah: Absolutely! Oh, hundred percent!

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: But part of that comes from age.

Sneezy: Yeah! Like, I’m very excited to make my way there –

Sarah: Yes!

Sneezy: – but some –

Sarah: It’s going to be awesome; you’re going to love it! Aging is dope!

Sneezy: Here’s the thing: some, some Nigerian aunties would say Wisdom is chasing you, but you’re running faster.

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: I don’t want to run that fast!

Sarah: No. You do not run too fast for wisdom; you’re catching up all the time.

Sneezy: Thank you! I appreciate that; it means a lot coming from you.

Sarah: Oh, thank you!

Sneezy: Yeah. But, you know, I think a lot about, like, where I want to be, and you’re in it, so you don’t see the trees; you don’t see the water.

Sarah: Yes. Yes.

Sneezy: Right, you’re, you’re just there, and so it’s, it’s nice to get, like, people I respect reminding me, like, Hey, you’re doing a thing! I’m, I’m like, Oh my God!

Sarah: You’re doing great.

Sneezy: I’m doing a thing!

Sarah: And I can tell you, I can give you a piece of advice from one of the earlier conversations that I had for this podcast.

Sneezy: Yeah!

Sarah: You never have to work out what you’re going to do with your life; you only have to work out what you’re going to do next. That’s it.

Sneezy: Ahhh! My anxiety just went, I can take a nap now. [Laughs]

Sarah: Yeah! How are you going to predict the rest of your life? I don’t know what next week’s going to look like. Like, I don’t even know what next year’s going to look like. We just finished a government shutdown; we’re probably going to have another one in January. I don’t know what it’s going to look like! Whatevs! You don’t have to work out what you’re going to do with the rest of your life. You can’t possibly know that. You just have to work out what you’re going to do next! And as long as what you do next –

Sneezy: Yeah.

Sarah: – is in alignment with how you feel and is a choice that you like, you’re good! You are all good! You’re doing great!

Sneezy: Thank you!

Sarah: Kick ass; take names. You’re doing great.

Sneezy: [Laughs]

Sarah: And, and thank you for connecting with me, and thank – first of all, thank you for being willing to get up at like four in the Goddamn morning; that’s absurd. But also, I’m, I’m glad we worked this out. Thank you for doing this interview! I love connecting with you from so far away? Thank you! It’s been lovely to chat with you, and I’m so glad that –

Sneezy: It’s been lovely for me too! Like, okay, I need to give you your flowers: thank you for creating the Smart Bitches space. Thank you for letting me in this space. Thank you for being so nurturing and so generous and so kind to me and all of us, and thank you for just living and helping us live in the value of, like, creating joy and not just managing sadness or bad feelings. ‘Cause you, you show up in a way where, like, it’s not that toxic positivity of, like, Oh, well, you don’t need to think about the bad things, but it’s like – I don’t know how to say it – like, basically, you show up in a way that helps me remember having joy and creating good things is not something to be shameful or, like, guilty about? You make it look like – we have a saying in Chinese like a duck swimming on water? Right, like, I, it must take a lot of intentionality on your part, and you, you must work really hard, but you just make it look like it’s easy –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: – like a ballet dance on this space sometimes like – so, you know, thank you for all of that!

Sarah: Thank you. I have received that compliment, and it means a lot. And I will tell you what I tell myself every day: you do not need to wait to be worthy of joy. You do not need to wait. Every day you should have as much joy as you want. Like, like, shit sucks. There’s still plenty to laugh and be joyful about, because, I mean, we’re alive. We, we just get this one. Life is short!

Sneezy: Yeah.

Sarah: Make stupid jokes.

Sneezy: [Laughs]

Sarah: Be an orange cat!

Sneezy: [Laughs harder] Capture an orange cat!

Sarah: Capture your orange cat. I think that’s a good plan.

Sneezy: I have three rules, right: go as far as you need for good food –

Sarah: Ohhh, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Sneezy: – go through, go through as many dictionaries as you need to read a good book, a good poem, a good whatever? Like, I don’t care if it’s in Farsi –

Sarah: [Laughs]

Sneezy: – Rumi, I’m coming for you! I’m coming!

Sarah: [Laughs harder]

Sneezy: Okay? And then lastly, wake up as early or stay up as late as you need for a good conversation. Those are my rules.

[outro]

Sarah: And that brings us to the end of this week’s episode. Thank you to Rae A, Josephine, and Sneezy for connecting with me. We still have more Holiday Wishes coming soon!

And, as I mentioned in the intro, there is still time to order your Smart Bitches candles, should you wish to. There’ll be a link in the show notes.

I end every episode with a terrible joke, and you know I’m not going to leave you hanging, right? Okay, this one’s so bad. This is for all of you Star Trek fans? Prepare to inflict this upon all of your relatives. Just know in advance that I’m very proud of you. This is from TheOtherBorgCube. This is like my second take ‘cause I keep laughing. Okay.

Did you – [laughs] – did you know that Captain Kirk has three ears?

It’s true, Captain Kirk has three ears!

A left ear, a right ear, and a final front ear.

[Laughs] Final front ear! I’m sorry, I need a tissue. Okay, that, that made my day. I hope, I hope you’re groaning. I hope you’re groaning, because, well, that was just delightful. Thank you, TheOtherBorgCube. [Laughs more] Final front ear!

On behalf of everyone here, we wish you the very best of reading. Have a wonderful weekend, and we’ll see you back here next week for more Holiday Wishes. And in the words of my favorite retired podcast Friendshipping, thank you for listening – with your final front ear. You’re welcome for talking! [Laughs]

[end of music]