It’s cover snark time! If you’re checking this while at work, maybe wait until you have some privacy, as some of these covers are showing quite a lot of skin. NSFW!
From Carole: Ouchy – not sure if this woman needs a chiropractor or perhaps an undertaker/mortician?
Elyse: Is that ocean spray coming out of her trachea?
Sarah: I think it’s the first sign that the alien is about to erupt from her chest and dance off into the sunset singing Hello My Honey, Hello My Baby, Hello my Ragtime Gaaaaaaaal.
Amanda: See…I never thought sexytimes on a beach was incredibly hot. You’ve got sand in your sensitive bits. Crabs, literally. And salt water spraying into all of your orifices.
Amanda: This cover makes me uncomfortable, as if we’ve stumbled into the heroine’s private time.
Redheadedgirl: The book was really disappointing, too. The cover implies a level of dirtiness that it never delivered.
Elyse: She’s enjoying herself. Literally
Sarah: Is the Governess getting a pelvic exam?
I mean, that’s a whole lot of flank on display.
Redheadedgirl: The hero IS a doctor.
Elyse: I think she just took her Spanx off and is reveling in letting it all hang out.
Carrie: The Governess Is Masturbating (not that there’s anything wrong with that).
Amanda: What body part is this…
Butt? Tiny preggo belly?
Redheadedgirl: Uhhhhh
Elyse: That’s an ass cheek
Redheadedgirl: That’s taking bubble butt a bit far.
Carrie: But where’s her legs if that’s a butt?
Redheadedgirl: She’s in a pike position?
It could be the tops of a bald head? Because her fingers don’t make a lot of sense if it’s a butt
Sarah: I vote shoulder.
Redheadedgirl: Uhhhhhh
Sarah: It can’t be her butt. That’s not where her heart is!
Elyse: It’s a butt. Her fingers make sense, if you’re kind of coming at it from the side.
Like flank butt.
Redheadedgirl: Look at the top though. There’s too much curve. All around.
Maybe it’s a tumor.
Elyse:
The other arrow is pointing to “other buttock not pictured” got cut off.
Sarah: He must reaaaalllly love her butt.
Elyse: If I went to the doc and he walked in shirtless I’d be so very concerned/
Carrie: Is that a thermometer in your hip pocket or are you just happy to see me and strangely built?
After enough morphine all doctors look just like this.
Elyse: If you can’t remember to put on a shirt, then I’m not trusting you to do my appendectomy.
Redheadedgirl: I’m just concerned he’s spent more time on his physique and not enough on continuing ed.
Sarah: Maybe that’s the secret. He found a gym that offers continuing ed, a Thighmaster®, a Shake weight®, and an Ab Roller®.
Carrie: He looks kinda spaced out, which makes me wonder if he’s been dipping into the morphine himself.
Elyse: Maybe he can’t afford his shirt because of medical school debt.
Carrie: “Hmm,” he thought “Gym fees, or a shirt?” I can only afford one if I’m going to pay my debt and also keep up my high protein diet. Gym fees it is!”
Sadly, he died when he tried to set up practice in Alaska and found that he could not afford a polar bear. Or a shirt.
Redheadedgirl: This got dark.
The mystery body part he’s nuzzling is intriguing. It’s like that dress pic. Do you see a butt cheek or a baby bump? My concern is what’s he pinching? Babybump outtie bellybutton? Nipple? (And if so, that’s a whole ‘nother conversation).
Baby bump makes the most sense, but that photo is Strange. At first I thought it was from the same photo used for Happily Even After by Lena Matthews – which is is definitely of a man cradling a baby bump – but now I don’t think so. (At least they don’t look the same on my phone) https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/sitb/B003Z9JOBY?ref=sib_dp_aw_kd_udp
Once, my regular GYN was out on holiday and I had to see another Dr. In walks “Dr. Trevor”. All spicy hot bod and great smile. First, no lab coat, just a golf shirt that pulled over his awesome biceps. He was all, “my name is Trevor Moore, but you can just call me Trevor.” He seemed like he was about 12.
This is NOT who you want doing your pelvic exam, y’all. It’s just disconcerting.
About the Governess Was Wicked… Is that Shelley Duval as the masturbating governess?
One time I had to go ti the ER and when the doctor walked in it was so hard to be appropriate as he was so outstandingly gorgeous. The charge nurse was attentding me and I asked how did they manage to get any work done with that doctor to drool over and she laughed and said “We call his the Greek god.”
I don’t see how that could possibly be a baby bump given that her legs seem to be going down and it looks like the back of her thighs.
More like “The Governess Was an Alien”: just look at those “fingers”. What ARE those?
Re: Governess: I try not to be too history-minded when judging historical romance covers, but when in the history of ever did a governess get to wear a bright pink frock? I mean, bright pink was not an economical color choice back in the day. Unable to suspend disbelief. 🙂
Mr Winds of Fate, if you’re trying to be a Regency maritime Spiderman, you’re doing it wrong. And the Governess looks like she’s starring in a Venus razor commercial.
What is throwing me off with the body part is that the body seems to just END right above his hand. That’s — disturbing.
It’s not a body part at all. He’s just in love with a large butternut squash.
@ chacha1 – I think the wickedness of the governess is borrowing her betters’ clothes for some fantasy times. I have a feeling there may be a lot of sizzle but little protein with this one from RHG’s comment.
For the hot doctor book, the unfinished business is a standoff over laundering his scrubs!
Last year, when I was in for major surgery, a tall blond man in scrubs who looked like he stepped off a naughty SEALs book came into my prep room and said, “I got your drugs.” Turns out he was the nurse anesthesiologist. A truly warm and funny man, he helped me deal with my anxiety about the surgery.
Thank you so much for a real laugh out loud moment with the mystery body part cover. It looks like a butt and the artistic depiction to prove the possibility just had me roll.
I ♥ Elise’s drawing! Thanks for this today, I needed to laugh out loud.
Maybe she’s sitting down and that’s her knee?
@Late night reader, seems like a very large and oddly shaped knee, if it is a knee. I’m still gonna go with butt because that would make this one of the most risque covers ever.
Oh, wouldn’t that be a wonderful article! “The Most Risque Romance Covers.” Start sending in your choices!!
Thanks for the laugh, that drawing is hilarious