One of my favorite things to do for the site is poke around for a fitting stock image to use on a post. Not only do I get to pick cool pictures to adorn the Pink Palace, but I also get to find some pretty strange stuff. Case in point, this guy:
When I showed Sarah, her first response was along the lines of “WE MUST CAPTION HIM!”
Why is he so happy? What’s he doing in the woods? Did he finally find a good wifi signal?
You decide! So here are the rules:
Caption that cover in the comments between now and Friday 1 April, 12pm.
If you’d like to voice your vote for the best caption in the comments, please do! There’s a little heart next to each comment – tap that to like your favorites. Much like Dance Fever, we love originality, execution, and showmanship – think Robin Hood archery contest level business. Comments will close 12 noon Eastern (US) time, 1 April 2016. A winner will be selected by random integer and announced that day.
What do you win?
The winner will receive a $50 gift card to the bookstore of his or her choice. Standard disclaimers apply: I’m not being compensated for this giveaway. Void where prohibited. Open to international residents were permissable by applicable law. All judging decisions will be final. Must be over 18 and willing to be one with nature. Keep all your cords and wires wrapped up and off the ground, lest a bear get a hold of them. Philosophizing about trees falling in the woods is allowed.
So, let’s caption this dude. What’s he thinking? What is he doing?! And why?
Update: Our contest winner is Katey! Her caption:
Finally! Proof that bears do $#!t in the woods! My dissertation is complete!
Thanks to all who participated and for giving the Bitchery a good laugh!
I. HAVE. A SIGNAL!!!!!!!!!
“Whoo! He likes kale chips, a good Shiraz AND lives in a brownstone!”
HELL YEAH! Elle Kennedy is finally writing a book about Tucker! Gingers unite!
THEY GOT…THE MUSTARD…OOOOUUUUTTT!!
WiFi in the middle of the wilderness
FTW!!!
[David Attenborough voice-over]
At long last, the young male has found what he has been searching for for so many hours: Amazon.com.
Ammon Bundy accepted my friend request!11!!11!!!!!!11
Kinfolk porn!
♪I’m so exicited and I just can’t hide it/I’m about to lose control and I think I like it♪
“I WON THE ARTISANAL BEARD BALM EBAY AUCTION!”
Guess who just got capital funding for their all-vegan, gluten-free, locally sourced restaurant that’s only open on the solstices? That’s right, MEEEEE!!!!
JACOB BLACK, I’m waiting!
“Yes! I can access my reading app out here!”
Free shipping on tents! And sleeping bags!! I don’t have to sleep under a pile of branches anymore!!
@Crystal, so funny! My actual first thought was that he was excited they were bringing Buffy back!! (Sadly, they are not. But how awesome would *that* be?!?!?)
Donald Trump is no longer running for President
FDA declares cronuts sustainable new food group.
Donald Trump is no longer running for President
Note:
email in my previous message was not correct because of capslock, email address on this message is the right one 😉
“A new Jonathan Franzen novel! Yippee!”
I win at Candy Crush! Organic Candy Crush, that is.
Part of my fact checking job is searching stock image sites for illustrations and some of the photos are hilarious and weird.
Caption-“I have an ending!”
Still not pronouncing it JIF.
My photo went viral, and… “He finally accepted my friend request!”
The Find My Phone app works.
“I’m back to Windows 7!”
I have conquered the internet gremlins. I AM A GOD!!!
Yes! My penis got a participation trophy!
Let it be, let it beee…!
I CAN FART FREELY OUT HERE!
4 years of research can finally answer bears do sh#t in the woods
A tree fell! And I heard it! I AM SOMEBODY!
With my beard and vaguely patterned shirt posing dramatically in the woods, I have attained hipster nirvana!
I found the Smart Bitches!
I finally figured out how to explain to my grandmother – in words she can understand – what I really do for a living.
While many would panic after finding themselves inexplicably trapped in their own screen saver image, Sean found the sensation… oddly freeing.
If a hipster squeas in the woods, does it make a sound if Facebook doesn’t record it?
Yes, a million twitter followers!
Yes! The Teleport App truly works everywhere!
OBVIOUSLY, he is rejoicing that his DABWAHA bracket didn’t bust yet! He made it to Elite Eight! [angels sing]
Babe, you must publish this romance novel!