There are levels of trouble in cover art land. There's “a little trouble,” like when the eyes of a cover model's face are Photoshopped a little crooked. There's “a lot more trouble” like a cover with nipples so erect that you could hang ornaments and some garlands off them. And then there's “WTFTROUBLE,” which is where we are today. Brace yourself as we take a look at some covers of “Beautiful Trouble Publishing” which specializes in erotic stories, some short, some romance, some bedecked with Poser. But each one teaches something important, I think. And not just the ages-old lesson, 'Always have the eyewash station handy.'
Now, much of this website is NSFW, but this is extra more NSFW, so be ye warned.
Here is some trouble sent to my inbox by Nicole:
First, there's the cover. He's gonna prick you.
But then, there's the price: $2.25 – and the size, 129k. 129k is SMALL. How small? Check the reviews: four 1-star reviews all complaining about the waste of money since the story takes “5 minutes to read” and that it “was way too short there was no story no plot build up.” One reviewer says the story is about 10 pages long.
So now we've learned: avoid expensive, too-small pricks.
Then there's this one:
What the hell is going on there? Where are her legs? What happened to the rest of her body?
AND WHY IS HIS ASS ALL WRINKLY WHILE HIS BUTTCRACK IS CROOKED?
Well, that might be the most realistic part of the cover, really, all those ass crevices. But you'd think if the woman was going to be sawed in half with Photoshop, they'd have at least given the poor guy a bit of a butt lift.
And yet there is a lesson here as well: Some guys have all the luck, some guys have all the pain, while other guys have women growing out of their thighs.
“Just one… more…finger…so…hungry…. almost…there…..”
This one's obvious: spay and neuter your pets, and for God's sake, feed them regularly!
I can't fault the cover for portraying the woman with thighs like Volkswagen Beetles (TM Chris' Invisible Super Blog) because she is, according to the description, a bodybuilder. But I can call shenanigans on the title, If You Must Wake the Tiger, Use a Long Lick, and on the abuse of Scriptina, which should be outlawed from all covers henceforth and forever.
That said, this cover goes really well with If It's Tuesday, There Must be Dildos, which reigns supreme as the best title ever. Perhaps this is the new wave of advice and fortune cookie fortunes: obscure romance titles. Now we know what to do with Tuesday, and with Tigers!
The more You Know!
I’m head of the committee that sponsors an annual romance cover contest and the Worst category is one of our most popular. The contest was created in 2000 because readers were embarrassed by the poor quality on romance covers and it was a way to complement excellent covers and highlight the “what were they thinking” covers. For several years, eBooks were not eligible for the Worst category because of the large budgets NY publishers had compared to the tiny eBook budgets. However, in the last few years there have been several eBook covers that made it to the top ten in both the Contemporary and Historical contest categories. In 2010, eBooks were made eligible for the Worst category as long as they were from an established publisher and not self published. I took a look at the covers on Beautiful Trouble Publishing and found a cover that I liked. It is possible to create great covers with a small budget.
https://beautifultroublepublis…
Linnae
“I’ve come to realize that there is no such thing as bad publicity. “
Oh yes there is. And you just got a load of it.
By the way, stalking people on Twitter is also a *really* bad way to sell yourself.
Honestly, I think you and your friends have many screws loose. This is abnormal, wildly disproportionate reaction to some gentle snark. Get help – but stop using this discussion as therapy. It’s icky.
Attack poodles don’t frighten me. I’m not going to get bit(ten). I know at the end of the day when the dust settles this will all just be yesterday’s news. Stale. I understand you all feel like you are banding together against the big bad internets. But all you are actually doing is taking something minor and turning it into something major with your ranting and name calling. Its been a nice evening of entertainment watching the commenting explode. As Nadia said Ms. Karland responded with grace and humor (and I would add tact). Its a lesson you all could learn. She’s woman enough to know (and acknowledge) that some of her artwork was lacking and to recognize that she has grown as an artist.
@patriot1990navy, I thought you said you weren’t coming back to this blog about 4 comments ago?
Tomorrow over coffee or at the water cooler you may all slap backs and say, “We sure stuck it to those stuck up bitches over at SBTB”, but really, you haven’t changed anything. All you’ve managed to do is exemplify how not to respond.
I sincerely hope not. There are many wonderful authors at BTP. I know at least one person I saw disagreed, but many times, it’s all in what you like. I personally have read only a couple of books from BTP i didn’t enjoy. Again, it’s all subjective. but i’m betting there is something for everyone there. I’ve found that normal rules don’t apply with them. You’re liable to find a Christmas book in April releasing… just cause. And it will sell. Look at me! I’m a white chick writing IR over there and making very good money. I’m not the end all and be all of erotic romance and I’m still learning about IR romance, but, man on man, what a ride! I’ve enjoyed the learning process like nothing i’ve ever embarked on!
HAHAHA!!! but i do so LOVE whining. isn’t whining allowed? ah hell..
LOL
seriously, I’m GLAD you found Beautiful Trouble Publishing! THANK YOU for taking the time to blog about us. I’ll accept your criticism… and hope you’ll take a look at my other work just cause I’m vain… 😛 what kind of artist—or author—would I be if I didn’t strive to better learn my craft?
I wonder if it’s even worth responding to the people from the epub since it doesn’t seem if they understand what they’re actually doing. It’s really sad, because this was actually a really good bit of advertising for the epub and if they’d rolled with it and laughed in return, it would have been excellent advertising.
Now I’m sure that there are writers who would have been interested in submitting their work who will now avoid it, not wanting to be lumped in with the kinds of people coming here to piddle on the carpet and congratulate each other on their good job.
I’m also sure there are plenty of writers who were looking for good cover artists who would have seen the early examples of a cover artist’s work and compared it to newer examples and thought, “Yeah, they might be someone to hire.” And now won’t. And you know why? Because they won’t want to be associated with a cover artist who can and will send out an army to protect them every time someone giggles at their work because it reflects on them and their name becomes associated with the cover artist’s attack. If I were a writer, I’d drop the cover art so fast the artist’s head would spin. It’s epub. It can be done in the span of a day.
I feel really sorry for the people at the epub who had nothing to do with this ridiculous mess. They’re going to be affected by this too.
Yes! this is a great contest! I’ve watched it for a long time with longing just cause it got so many entries. I’ll admit, this is the first time I’ve had covers singled out, though I knew it would happen… it does to everyone… I had hurt feelings. sure. who wouldn’t? but I rapidly saw it for what it was. An opportunity for me to connect with people I don’t normally interact with. Yeah, there are a few posts i found hurtful for hurt sake, but I alwo recognized the humor on others. as a result… yeah. I’ve stayed up half the freekin night and i have to WORK TOMORROW!!! *headdesk* it’s been fun though!
*confused look* replying to your twitter posts is “stalking?” i simply followed your link. I’m sorry if that offended you. I thought that was why the link was in your post. *shrug* most people do that, anyway.
again, my apologies.
Considering I’ve seen better and more professional-looking graphics made by virtual children for fan fiction, *for free,* I don’t really think the whole budget and “small publisher” excuse holds water.
As for the attack poodles, well, I guess I was late to the party and it’s all been said. Except, again – sometimes I think low-level ebook authors and their so-called publishers could benefit by time in fandom. As amateur and ridiculous as that sounds, I’ve seen better behaviour and better end product there than this mess.
It’s okay, I just blocked you and reported you for spam.
I’m sorry if *that* offended you.
*blinks* it didn’t actually, and thank you for your concern. Like i said. I was just following the link you put out there. I really thought, after filtering through a few negative post, that this was all in good fun. isn’t that what was said earlier? That you guys do this all the time, that it’s a time honored tradition?
I’ve honestly tried to be professional and i really HAVE enjoyed myself. I sincerely hope that, what ever I’ve done to offend you, you can move past. I’d hate to think I was the cause for such negative feelings on your part.
again, have a nice evening and thanks for taking the time to view our books and art.
Teeka
I believe this is among the so much significant info for me. And I’m glad studying your article. But want to observation on some general things,
As someone who buys print books ONLY for the cover, I have been biased against ebooks (aside from the usual ebook complaints) for their covers. Frankly, I wouldn’t mind if they all were some variation of AN ENGLISH ROSE: a hot guy with some object of import to the story. Any more than that and the cover looks a bit more cluttered and I would skip over that particular ebook.
Art is subjective, but graphic design is objective. Cover art always falls under the category of graphic design, but cannot always be called art. That is a design industry fact. Any professional designer (of any field) will tell you one of the first lessons you are taught is to not get too personally attached to your work or to take the criticism so personal. If you can’t do that then you are in the wrong field.
As for those of you whining about the bitchery and snark, get a clue. Before you start accusing people of targeting and discriminating you should double check the history of the cover posts on this site. If you did, you would see that it doesn’t matter who the publisher or writer is. A CRAPTACULAR COVER IS A CRAPTACTULAR COVER.
You should think of what it says about the romance/erotica industry in general. Even though it brings in more money and attention to the written word than most other genres, it is still considered by many to be the red-headed step child of the publishing world (no offense to the gingers). Sadly this is reflected by the cover art. Which is one of the main points of this post. On the other hand, some of the more interesting, and well done, cover art designs conceal some of the crappiest writing (Twilight anyone?)
The fact is that people do judge books by their covers, which is why there are professional designers. For all the writers that write just for writing’s sake, most publishers are out there for money’s sake. If they can make a relatively quick profit with a crap cover, they will. If they actually care about product/brand (= book/writer) then they make the effort, and spend more money to make more money.
As for the selection of today’s post… The first has potential. The others are just wrong on so many levels. And this is coming from someone who is willing to read a lot of crap/trash/smut in the name of escaping reality.
Whoa. Came back here this morning (I am over in Sweden) and saw the mess this thread has become. I seriously don’t understand how one could construe this as an attack on a publisher – we were all just poking fun at some craptacular cover art. If you put it out there, it is the same as for authors, you have to realise it is going to be judged – regardless of how much time and effort and blood, sweat and tears spent on it.
When the Patriotic woman – who is not coming back – with the attitude of: “if you don’t think like us, you are against us and wish us ill” commented: “Bitches like you make me so sick to think just by being you, you are somehow better than others.” it was like someone showing up at a friendly tea party started to throw dishes because she did not like what was served up.
I don’t think I am better than my fellow man. However, I know I have seen plenty of better cover art.
An interesting article on LifeHacker, on how to realize when you are wrong, states:
If you’re trying to change someone else’s behavior, there’s a big chance you’re wrong. This is hard to accept because often times people will behave poorly, or at least not according to the way you feel they should conduct themselves. That said, while you can encourage people to change you are most likely taking the wrong approach by trying to change them.
I recommend it. http://lifehacker.com/5879968/…
No excuse for this kind of artistic suck. It takes about a week to learn to wrangle Photoshop/Paintshop/YourChoiceOfPhotomanipulationProgram and then buy some nice stock photos and create a nice cover. The problem with many love/erotic/romance eBooks is they tend to go for the naughty human flesh factor. However, whoever does the manipulation doesn’t have the training/eye/clue to put a true sense of eroticism on the image. If you can’t figure out where body parts go DON’T use them in your image.
On a fun note, I know of several authors who, when they release their eBooks, create their own covers! Then their publisher approves or disapproves of the cover accordingly. The key is the PUBLISHER has some sort of taste. Usually, not in the “Hey I love random floating body parts!” or “Visual irony is visual!”
Are there covers horrible? Nah, just pretty bad. Would they deter me from choosing to read the stories inside? Yup! So it’s really the creators choice. Fix it up or don’t have my money.
God, grow up. We snark on bad covers no matter who published the book. Look through the site and you’ll find the same for the big time companies as well.
It’s fun! Life’s too short to take everything seriously.
Wow. Guess I’m getting crazy with my cornflakes this morning.
Like I told Patriot1990navy, grow up. We snark on all kinds of awful covers here. Sometimes it’s just better if a company goes with an old fashion plain cover with no art because the art they use is so bad.
I imagined, once I hit ‘post’ on my comment, that this would upset folks from the interracial romance community that felt targeted by this blog. I can’t speculate on the relationship between SBTB and the publisher with any authority, but I’m guessing there is none. It’s too bad feelings were hurt here—as an independent writer/someone with sub-par covers in the interracial/multicultural romance genre, I appreciate some how-to’s and I Likes and I Hates on cover art; there’s no actual commentary in the actual blog entry about the content of the stories. I totally sympathize with bummed out fans feeling defensive about the books they love. And I think it’s probably a good bet the stories these authors wrote are actually getting a bump from the attention in this blog—they’re not going to quit writing. In the long run, even harsh feedback can create better quality product for fans (that’s how I look at it—too optimistic? Don’t tell me, I don’t want to know :)…
And I really do want to meet that cover artist. I want them to airbrush me up something special, because that is the backdrop I imagine while we talk about Illuminati and how to legitimize small press multicultural erotica. Boom.
I think they’re all the same person, honestly.
I’m always amazed that, with so many talented artists and so many folks skilled with computer graphics, they can wind up with such terrible art for the cover. It’s like seeing a horrible magazine cover and thinking, “They took hundreds of photos and decided to use THAT one?” I hope whoever is responsible for signing off on the cover art (which is one of the biggest incentives for a potential customer to buy the book) gets raked over the coals, if not outright fired.
I don’t know who you are but I had concerns about the editing in the books. The language was not reachable for me. Your insults are I think questionable in origin because I didn’t attack anyone. I said that I read their books because they offered interracial romance which many other publishers do not. However, if I am paying for a product, I have a right to expect a certain level of editing. Especially considering the price vs length on many of these books. In fact, multiple small presses need to be more strict with their editing – I say this not just grammatically but plot wise. Beautiful Trouble is not the only company.
I do not appreciate that you are judging my reading preferences and making assumptions that I prefer to read incest because I feel that editing is required. I encourage you to step back and reconsider.
I really liked the idea and was excited that there was a publisher who paid attention, since it is a very narrow and focused genre. Not everyone is willing to take the risks. I liked Billy London’s work from them (I bought a copy of one of her books for my sister who loved it), though it did take some active suspension of disbelief. But I also agree with your earlier comment, $6 is a lot for a short book that might not be readable more than once.
I think what a lot of people are missing here is we’re not really snarking on the contents of the books – I haven’t read them, I don’t intend to if they’re erotica because erotica often contains anal sex and I prefer to pretend anal does not exist. It’s the bad cover art. The authors themselves could be the reincarnation of Shakespeare, but the cover art is to covers what Rebecca Black is to music. She has talent but instead of going to a teacher and developing it, she relies on autotune so people hate her. These cover artists have talent but need more classes to develop it so we’re not treated to women with no legs and men with my butt.
Hee. Seriously Patrick, you should ask your friend what is with the guys’s pale white ass. It’s like mixing a centaur and Danny Devito. It just doesn’t meld. I hope that your friend who does the covers can take criticism better than you.
WTF! I leave for 24 hours & everyone loses they’re freakin’ minds!?
I know the old adage you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover really does apply here. But to be honest, when a book in any form (hardback, ebook, whatever) has a cringe-inducing cheap cover – like the above – I automatically assume the story inside is just as cringe-inducing and cheap. That’s wrong, I know. I might be missing out on some entertaining stories. Again, I’m just being honest.
The third cover, the delicious thoughts one, looks very nice.
Beggar1015: Same here. I remember an article about how many websites were losing business because simple spelling errors were making them seem unprofessional, and it’s the same principle here.
I happily admit I don’t know much about publishing, but I’m going to assume artists know about the “uncanny valley” effect, where something close to realistic but not quite can be more offputting than something obviously unrealistic. It’s especially going to be bad for an erotica title if the people on the cover appear to be inhumanly proportioned or made of plastic because it’s going to be actively unsexy to a large portion of the audience (unless you’re into people made of plastic, I’m not here to judge), creating the opposite effect the story was intended to have.
I try not to judge a book by it’s cover. If the plot sounds interesting I will just deal with a crappy cover. I’ve read books that I loved where the cover made me want to cringe.
The cover with the rose was just meh, nothing crazy wrong with it, but not particularly exciting. The one with the bear (hyena?) was also just ok, except for the weird animal placement. The one with that nightmare inducing ass was just a horrific mess. Seriously, I’VE done better than that and I am by no means a professional. The rendered cover looks either like amateur work or a rush job. The poses and texture look like stock and the glow effect look straight up amateur.
Not a fan of rendered covers in generally. I’ve seen some some beautifully rendered work, I have a friend who works with CGI professionally and she rocks it, but most rendered covers are cheap and badly done.
One thing that turns me off big time, though, is situations like this where an author gets in the middle of stuff like this and is supportive of people acting like asses on their behalf. It makes me dislike the author as a person and, honestly, I’ve stopped reading authors who’s stuff I really liked because they’ve acted like jerks online. Maybe y’all think I should judge an author strictly based on their work, but the way I see it is why would I give you my money if I don’t like you? The fact that the people involved in this all seem to be from the same publisher just kind of put me off Troubled Rose.
You know, it’s interesting that you bring up the interracial relationships factor, because not long ago (last month maybe?) I remember a conversation on this site about how a lot of people would like to see more interracial romance (and not the “Oh, she’s Asian, isn’t she EXOTIC? And TINY/FLEXIBLE?” Or things of that ilk.) and if the people associated with this publisher had responded with more grace and less absurdity, I bet they could have attracted those same readers. It’s a missed opportunity, as others have said. But then, this kind of response to criticism is nothing new on this site, so oh well. I got my drama for the day.
You know, the title for this post got me thinking. What have we learned, class?
I’d say we bitches have learned that we haven’t cornered the market on bitchery. Also, beware of attack poodles!
But what have the folks from Big Trouble Publishing learned? I’m going to go out on a limb here and say, “nothing.” Too bad, because this post and comments thread is simply teeming with lessons:
*How to turn people off from reading your books.
*How not to respond to criticism.
*How not to respond to publicity.
*How not to know thy enemy. (The site has “bitches” in the title. Calling us bitches? Not offensive. Also, we do this kind of stuff all the time. It isn’t personal until YOU MAKE IT SO.) Subpoint: The enmity didn’t start until the attack poodles did their dastardly work. Foolish, foolish, foolish.
*How to make sure that people continue seeing small publishers as unprofessional.
And the list goes on.
That being said, keep on cover snarking, Sarah. It’s fun.
I’m sorry I’m late in seeing this. I had to work late tonight and my son wanted a game of checkers. *shrugs* I couldn’t resist. 🙂
Thanks for looking at the other covers I sent! I’m glad you found one you thought pleasing.
First time I’ve ever posted a comment on Smart Bitches and I come here almost every day (for the past 5 years!).
I really feel strongly and gotta agree with Laura N. I’m really turned off by the comments found from most of this publisher’s artists. So unnecessary and damaging to their own image. (and…so many comments…wow)
Yes, I am a smart bitch and I am trashy and snarky and I’m the person you want to encourage to buy your books.
My daughter just received her BA in Graphic Design. It is because people are honest and she listens to criticism that she improves in her art.
“Keep on cover snarking, Sarah” AMEN
(nice comment, Marteeka. Checkers is better than this mess!)
Looking at the attached files, I agree that your art has improved. However, I would advise two things:
1) Have actual live people model your planned poses (or final poses) just to make sure they look “right” (i.e, something live people would actually do comfortably). When working on your own art, one is often too close to it to see the flaws that other people find jarring. Reality-checking (i.e., can I really bend that way? Will arms fit there comfortably?) helps. Believe me, it’s not just your art; I’ve seen some well-known fantasy cover art with hands on backwards and other unfortunate poses.
2) Don’t encourage or celebrate “attack poodles” (or other overzealous fan behavior); it makes you appear very unprofessional, especially when the rabid fan behavior is in response to legitimate criticism. It gives the impression of “prima donna who can’t stand being told she’s not perfect”. That’s… not a good impression to give.
Your own response was actually pretty classy, until you said you would do the same thing as your zealous fans. I winced, because that last statement just shot down all the class you’d displayed previous.
Just noticed the cover for Mage Silence in the ads on the front page. I see a glowing penis in front of that man’s mouth. Anyone else?
Fans of Beautiful Trouble Publishing, Smart Bitches has been doing cover snark for years. They have snarked the covers of books they love, covers of books by authors they love, covers of books by authors that post here, and covers of books I’ve loved. It is not personal. While I applauded always trying to be better in anything that you do, if you don’t see that the woman in one of the covers doesn’t appear to have any legs, there is a problem.
If you look through the site, you will see cover snark is a common segment. SBTB is good exposure for the publisher (I had heard of one of the authors but not this publisher). Books written by people who regularly read the site and comment here are given the same treatment for odd/ugly/anatomically incorrect covers. Then we all go buy the books anyway. We buy the books that get awful reviews to see if it really was that bad, we go check out whatever else is at the publisher. We are readers.
Stop whining and let the increased traffic to the publisher produce sales.
Has anyone here seen “The Room?” The guy from number two looks just like Tommy Wiseau. All I could think was:
“You look so SEXY, Lisa.”