HaBO: Hilarious Request

You did it! We figured this one out! It is a truth universally acknowledged (by me for certain) that the Bitchery pretty much knows everything, and really, it's true. Scroll down to see the solution for this HaBO - and many thanks!

RedHeadedGirl emailed me with one of the most hilarious HaBO requests ever. I laughed so hard when I read it, Hubby made me read it to him – and he giggled for about ten minutes, too. Even if you don’t know the book, enjoy the request.

Okay, so back in the Bad Old Days of Zebra books in the gas stations, with
the Classic Historical Bodice Ripper covers and conviniently placed
postcards in the middle, I ran across this book in Toby’s Restaraunt in
Hinkley, Minnesota on our way up to Duluth. I never bought it because I was
maybe about 13 at the time, had no money, and my parents would have shat a
brick, and while the Shatting of the Bricks was always fun, I chose to save
my chips for something more substantial than a romance novel. (granted these
details are not important, except that I remember exactly where I stumbled
on this book, and EVEN NOW, on the rare occasions I end up at Toby’s, I
find myself looking at their book rack, wondering if it’s there).

But I’ve been wondering about this book for 18 years now (I need a life),
and have no idea what the title is or anything. So here’s the summary I
remember:

Probably English dude is in a tavern in Scotland, Scottish woman appears in
his room, he thinks she’s a whore his buddies bought him for the night,
there’s Happy Fun Times (given that this was 1991 or so, I’m assuming Old
School Rules are in play, and it was less fun for her). She leaves before he
wakes up, leaving behind 1) proof of her erstwhile virginity and 2) a single
strand of long red hair. He freaks out because she was in possession of the
Magic Hoo-Hoo that matched with His Mighty Wang, and goes off in search for
her (like you do). Or something.

I also vaguely remember that she needed something and thought she could get
it (information? a pardon? a cookie?) from him, and that’s why she ended up
in his room.

Is that vague enough?

I bet it was a cookie she was after. Don’t you think? Anyone remember this book? And who is up for a stop at Toby’s book section after lunch?