These days, anyone can be a baseball announcer. Except women. And I take exception to that. It’s time to storm the announcer’s booth – and we can start getting ready now. How? We can come up with our own home run signature phrase!
A what now?
Some of the best and funniest broadcasters had catchphrases (no pun intended) and signature lines when a home run is hit. Bob Uecker of the Minnesota Milwaukee Brewers: “Get up, Get outta here, Gone!” Harry Caray and Phil Rizzuto: “A home run! Holy cow!” Chris Berman from ESPN: “Back back back back back back…GONE!” Bob Prince, from the old-school days of the Pirates: “Kiss it goodbye!” See? Nothing to it.
So let’s get creative. Enter your parts o’ speech below, and come up with your own home run signature phrase. Practice it at little league. Use it in mixed groups of sports fans. Either you’ll look like you’re exceptionally knowledgeable, or people will ask to share what you’re smoking. Either way- fun for all!
And HELL YES there are prizes. I’ll pick five winners – and each winner will receive a paper copy of Jill Shalvis’ Double Play. I’m a sucker for Shalvis’ heroes, and I really enjoyed this one. The hero is an all-star pitcher who is forced to wonder if there might be something more to life than just baseball – and the heroine keeps distracting him when he needs to keep his focus around her.
So let’s play ball. You’ve got 24 hours. Batter up! Grab some pine!
Note: the results appear in a popup window, so be ye warned.
Holy Platypus ! That sphere just warped the buffalo jump and it won’t stop dancing ‘til it reaches Azerbaijan!!
Holy mackeral ! That melon just swept the Melbourne and it won’t stop fumbling ‘til it reaches Korea!!
Holy cow!!! That ping pong ball’s just flew out the Liberia and she won’t stop exploding ‘til it reaches King-domKum!!
Holy penguin! That oreo just jitter-bugged the Run’s House and it won’t stop avoiding ‘til it reaches Prussia!!
Holy ferret ! That hubcap just sang the bathroom and it won’t stop kicking ‘til it reaches Japan!!
Holy platypus ! That ass just tapped the Vienna and it won’t stop winking ‘til it reaches Costa Rica!!
*Can’t believe someone else used Platypus. Great minds!*
Holy Dog ! That globe just had the pool and it won’t stop running ‘til it reaches Transylvania!!
Holy aardvark ! That supernova just wilted the restroom and it won’t stop severing ‘til it reaches Timbuktu!!
lol!
Smart Bitches Technology: Your Homerun Signature Phrase!
Holy badger ! That orange just throttled the Poughkeepsie and it won’t stop skipping ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy Willie Wagtail ! That donut just flicked the coconut grove and it won’t stop smiling ‘til it reaches Guadalcanal!!
from the baseball mom
Holy sardine ! That hula hoop just cracked the gay paree and it won’t stop slicing ‘til it reaches france!!
Holy Wompoo Fruit-Dove ! That plum just jammed the packing plant and it won’t stop smartin’ ‘til it reaches New South Wales!!
Holy Donkeys! That orange just rocked the Willis Tower and it won’t stop grappling ‘til it reaches Mexico!
Holy pronghorn ! That ass just overpowered the whorehouse and it won’t stop conquering ‘til it reaches Uzbekistan!!
Holy Edible-Nest Swiftlet ! That spitball just soaked the seat and it won’t stop drippin’ ‘til it reaches Sumatra!!
Holy Vole ! That Melon just Frisked the Sporting goods store and it won’t stop Spanking ‘til it reaches Lichtenstein!!
Holy Cow as Mr. Phil Rizzuto always said, that seamed orb just keeps going and going and won’t stop til it gets to the moon!
Holy Golden Nightjar ! That eyeball just rocked the jug and it won’t stop smellin’ ‘til it reaches Senegal!!
Holy hedgehog ! That frisbee just shot the Jupiter and it won’t stop penetrating ‘til it reaches Ukraine!!
Holy Hairy Woodpecker ! That hazelnut just whittled the arbor and it won’t stop hacking ‘til it reaches Guatemala!!
Holy vole ! That lint ball just quaffed the Gorilla City and it won’t stop clomping ‘til it reaches Montenegro!!
Holy tyrannosaurus rex ! That sun just LBW-ed the Atlantic Ocean and it won’t stop slam-dunking ‘til it reaches New Zealand!!
I’m very disappointed that I couldn’t find a way to fit the word ‘gargantuan’ into that sentence anywhere.
Holy kangaroo ! That tomato just licked the Mordor and it won’t stop dancing ‘til it reaches Mongolia!!
Holy Fire-tufted Barbet ! That cherry just flamed the firehouse and it won’t stop scorching ‘til it reaches President of Malaysia!!
Here goes again,
Holy Cow, that seamed orb slammed into the moon and wont stop going til it reaches Australia.
Pat L.
(nearly finished – aren’t ya glad?)
Holy Crested Tit ! That bird brain just nipped the mantitty and it won’t stop snacking ‘til it reaches Strathspey, Scotland!!
Holy raccoon ! That hard-boiled egg just climbed the dentist office and it won’t stop testing ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy Restless Flycatcher ! That one beady-eye just panicked the flock and it won’t stop rising ‘til it reaches Nirvana!!
OK, now I’m done. Thanks for letting me annoy you all day!
Holy dragon ! That lingonberry just patted the dreamland and it won’t stop dropping ‘til it reaches Zambia!!
Holy snail ! That orange just felled the bed and it won’t stop thrusting ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy Aardvark ! That lime just water-skied the Paraguay and it won’t stop rolling ‘til it reaches Kazakhstan!!
Holy hornbills ! That testicle just eclipsed the the Acroplis and it won’t stop googleying ‘til it reaches Accrington Stanley!!
Smart Bitches Technology: Your Homerun Signature Phrase!
Holy Cheetah ! That orange just chased the speakeasy and it won’t stop grandstanding ‘til it reaches Italy!!
Holy cougar ! That marble just marinated the heaven and it won’t stop slithering ‘til it reaches Sweden!!
Holy wolverine ! That testicle just sold the Fairfax and it won’t stop turning ‘til it reaches Saudi!!
Smart Bitches Technology: Your Homerun Signature Phrase!
Holy Naked Mole Rat ! That hacky sack just bounced the outer space and it won’t stop fighting ‘til it reaches Croatia!!
Holy six beaked penguin ! That matzoh ball just steamed the sewer and it won’t stop sizzling ‘til it reaches the Holy Land!!
Holy Tapir ! That Peach just ate the College and it won’t stop Flaming ‘til it reaches Frankfurt!!
Holy Elk ! That Frisbee just dumped the bedroom and it won’t stop sleeping ‘til it reaches Ireland!!
Holy Wombat ! That Jupiter just fretted the Salvation Army and it won’t stop gorging ‘til it reaches Lichtenstein!!