So poor Jane Austen is now afflicted with zombies, aliens, predators, and all manner of terrible things – and here I thought Mr. Collins was pretty damn awful.
Do you get the feeling that poor Jane is getting an undue amount of paranormal attention?
What about the other masterpieces of romance fiction?
What about MORE paranormal or just plain extra more better oddity added to an already-paranormal romance?
I have two words: Hellooooo Hollywood!
Use the random Romance And More! generator created with patented Bitchenatin’® Technology to create your own blockbuster. And hook us up in the comments with any screenplay pitch blurbs you may have for your work in progress – 25 words or less, please. Best one as judged by your comments and yours truly will win a $25 gift certificate to Amazon or the bookstore of the winner’s choosing. 24 hours starting now.
The Next Hollywood romance blockbuster will be:
Comments are Closed
[Not part of the pitch: Here’s what the generator gave me: Slave to Sensation with line-dancing zombies!]
When Lucas, changeling turned zombie, starts line-dancing, nothing can stop Sascha from giving him her heart… and her brains.
Not part of it, but I like the ad that popped up beside this saying “Jane Eyre meets the Mummy”
(the generator gave me: “Claiming the Courtesan with outlaw ninjas”! Okay, here’s my attempt, LOL)
When courtesan Soraya is kidnapped by the Duke of Kylemore, outlaw ninjas help her battle her way out of his bed—and into his heart.
Catain Kidd and Vampires gave me
Mr. Impossible with Fussy Pirates!!
Homophobic Superhero trapped on a ship with gay pirates?
Stephan, the Lord of the Fading Lands, calls upon fashion goddess Sophia to help him keep the shoddily-dressed werewolves from taking over the land!
The generator gave me ‘Dreaming of You’ with retrocognitive puppies!
I got nothing… what are retrocognitive anythings? 🙂
I never realized how short 25 little words were before. I think I got the best title for a normal romance though – a Beyond Heaving Bosoms sequel, perhaps?
I got: Sex, Straight Up with Luuuuurve™!
She always knew her first time would be special, different…but she didn’t know that it would be like this. Now with twice the Luuuuurve™ action!
[Montana Sky with pudding-obsessed unicorns!]
Mary Rose thought she’d be able to manage anything that happened on her unicorn ranch—until Lord Harrison, heir to a pudding fortune, came to town.
Thunder and Roses
With the scent of roses hanging heavily in the air and thunder rumbling in the distance, Anna took a chance and popped the bottle’s cork. In a swirl of mist, he appeared before her, ready to grant her every wish—so long as he had a coupon for it.
A man who was cheap and easy—her dream come true.
Shoot, I over shot it. Hmmm Let me retry that. Sorry, I overlooked the word limit.
Thunder and Roses coupon-clipping djinni!
He was cheap. He was easy. And he granted wishes so long as he possessed a coupon.
Security word: thinking99, yep, I was definitely thinking closer to 99 than I was 25. *sigh* It’s way too early for this thinking stuff. lol
Virgin and Vampire gave me: His Lordship’s Mistress agoraphobic mermaids!
I got nothing for a screenplay…but the title is AWESOME!
Mr. Impossible with Massage Therapist Poltergeists!!
When Daphne springs Rupert from jail to rescue her brother, she thinks he luuurves her – but his constant moans of pleasure aren’t due to her charms.
[I got The Spanish Prince’s Virgin Bride with flesh eating were-slugs!]
Juan found out why she was a virgin on their wedding night, when simple the moon was full and the sex got painfully strange…
XD Oh, that could lead to some very, very, very wrong scenes.
Oops, typo there, I meant:
Juan found out why she was a virgin on their wedding night, when the moon was full and the sex got painfully strange…
kiss of a demon king with fussy pirate from howl and wolf
The King was sent to a boat with a captain and crew of women who decided to keep him as their sex slave.
Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland with Zombies gave me Mistress with Were-slugs.
I think Alice + Zombies could really be great. “Off with her head” takes on all new meaning. Zombies are slow, so they could be caught and used as mallets for playing croquet with the Queen. And since the whole thing lends itself to the sense that you’re on an acid trip the the life threatening undead would really blend right in.
The Grand Sophy with suspicious carbuncles!
Why did her carbuncles eye her askew? They seemed to doubt her good intentions.
I got Something Wonderful with Massage Therapist Poltergeists
Willow, a werewolf, never gave love a thought until she sprained her back. Can she trust her heart and pained muscles to a dead man?
The Duke and I with hormonal pixies
The duke and the debutante planned to fool society. They never dreamed they’d have to band together to save the Cornish countryside from raging pixies.
A flesh-eating were-slug invasion! The brilliant mathematician who can save us has a stroke! Can a pretty Quaker reach him in time to save humanity?
In case it isn’t obvious, that’s Flowers from the Storm with flesh-eating were-slugs.
From Romeo and Juliet and werewolves
I got Dark Lover with hyperventaling dwarves.
I don’t think I can improve on that.
my word Dead24
Yup, 24 and counting
I once twittered Regency zombies. They were at Almacks trying to dance. Another was at tea with a Lady and his eyeball fell in his cup.
However, I got Ember with party-hopping basilisks This strikes me as quite possibly better than Regency zombies. Herewith, my screenplay pitch:
Ember Feathergood sets aside her dream of a society debut to assist Lord Basil after all of London’s demon slayers mysteriously turn to stone.
I got “Paradise with carnivorous koalas”. Sounds like pretty much every beach vacation I’ve been on…
What romantic couple wouldn’t want to spend a weekend on a white sandy beach? Unfortunately, flesh-eating carnivorous koalas form romantic relationships, too.
Outlander with operatic ghosts –
Gabaldon meets Gilbert & Sullivan. Fun and frivolity in four-part harmony as Claire and her Scottish band frisk through the Highlands.
Delicious with spicy leprechauns!
Chef Verity Durant has her hands full when the pesky little green-clad buggers invade her kitchen garden. Solution? Leprechaun Biryani, spicy Irish-Indian fusion cuisine!
“Dark Lover with Were-Hamsters”
John Matthew faces the ultimate in heartbreak in his heartbreaking life when he discovers his butch girlfriend does, indeed, sprout whiskers.
“Born in fire with vertigo-afflicted merfolk!”
Will sparks fly or fizzle as a phoenix and a merman investigate a school of merfolk with a case of inexplicable vertigo?
I tried Charles Dickens with vampires and got Talk Me Down with vertigo-afflicted merfolk(not quite what I was expecting).
There seems to be more of an interest in Dickens these days,so I do think the vampire angle would be fun-why else would Miss Havisham locked herself away in that house for all of those years,hmm? Not to mention Estella’s powerful hold on Pip,plus Magwitch could be a vampire hunter who wishes to repay him for hiding him out from a group of bloodsuckers that wiped out his whole Van Helsing crew and went after him(they did meet in a graveyard,remember!)
ETERNAL EXPECTATIONS-some secret desires must be paid for with blood!
” It Had To Be You” With Hostile Dragons
Phoebe and Dan’s love is tested during the off season game against the women of The View . Sponsered by Climara.
(The generator gave me The Grand Sophy with merry vampires)
Charles Rivenhall will tolerate his cousin Sophy, but her friends from the Continent are a step too far! (Especially when they begin biting the ton!)
The Serpent Prince with Irritable Six-legged antelopes
Simon Iddesleigh must avenge the death of his brother in a series of duels with the six-legged antelopes who killed him. But not before making sweet, sweet love to his darling Lucy—while the surprisingly irritable six legged antelopes look on.
Wait, what about A Rose in Winter by Woodiwiss, with alien zombie ninja robots? That’s really the only thing I can think of that would be better than A Rose in Winter without alien zombie ninja robots…I mean, secret identities, loving two men – or not, never earning the love of a father who is crappy anyway and *****spoiler***** not your daddy anyway…for what more could one ask? Other than alien zombie ninja robots.
Wrath thought Beth was half-human, but she was more.
Killing Lessers was easier than spinning in the excercise wheel of love with a werehamphster.
I pulled Dark Lover with werehamsters.
It was hard to keep from adding more H’s to make it a ‘wherehamphster’.
wanted47 yep I wanted at least 47 more words to flesh this out!
Well, I tried “Barbara Cartland with zombies” because I so totally would read that, but got…
The Serpent Prince with Saks-addicted hags
Beauty and the Beast with a gender-bending twist: Lord Simon must choose between seeking vengeance and the perfect handbag alongside a strangely alluring crone concealing dark needs…
Dreaming of You with Vexed Alchemists
Derek Craven has a secret. Along with the spectacles of a certain prim authoress who has captured his heart, he also hides within his coat pocket the formula for turning ordinary historical romance novels into solid gold—vexing the penniless publishe…er, alchemists who will stop at nothing to learn the truth.
been35—Hey! I AM 35!
Wild at Heart with retrocognitive puppies!
Adventure, anthropology, and romance! Syndney knows her puppies have extrasensory abilities. Could the wild man raised by wolves be the key to communication with them?
Pride and Prejudice with frisky selkies!
Will Darcy overcome his pride and Lizzie her prejudice? And will they both be able to resist the flirtatious, fortune-hunting seal-people from Scotland?
Mr. Impossible with werehamsters!
Rupert was sure he could handle anything that came across Daphne’s path, but he’d never seen anything like this: marauding werehamsters out for blood and broccoli!
And yes, that last one has 26 words. Word limit hard!
Aaaand, my security word is were95—95 werehamsters!! RUN!!
Heehee! Crystal, this gets a vote from me.
It Had To Be You + Amorous Bigfoot
Doesn’t that already describe a lot of the linebackers?
Bet Me with carnivorous koalas:
Min and Cal fell in love over food, but will becoming food tear them apart?
The Vampire Queen’s servant with accountant yetis!
Saving the Undead World, one balance sheet at a time!
Spamalot: actually99. No dangit, I just spent too much time in the sun. I’m only 41.
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