All I Can Say Is…

You will never look at flan the same way again.

The comments, too, are gold. Spoogetastic gold.

[Thanks to Elf for the link.]

Comments are Closed

  1. 1
    Annmarie says:

    I saw that a few days ago. It is hilarious…in an omg this is totally disgusting sort of way.

  2. 2
    Sandra D says:

    Nnnooooooooo, I love flan! That’s just all sorts of wrong, can you imagine serving that to your mother? “This is delicious dear, what’s your secret?” “Fresh eggs and oh yeah a cup of Bob’s semen. I used Fred’s in the salad dressing, I find it just blends better with the savoury flavours.”

  3. 3

    Oh, now that is so very wrong.

  4. 4
    amy lane says:

    Yeah… how WOULD you introduce that one to company?

    “Hey, this flan is great—I’d LOVE the recipe!”

    “Well first go give your husband a blow job, and then techniques vary, but…” 


    Many many levels of wrong.

  5. 5
    ev says:

    No, no, no, no!!! Flan is my absolutely favorite dessert and I wil never be able to look at it again without wondering.

    I hate shit like that.

    spamword- car58 where are you????

  6. 6
    Joanna S. says:

    *screams into an uncaring universe*


    Or, on second thought, I must show this to my boyfriend immediately – he may want it as a stocking stuffer (hur.)

  7. 7
    Alisha Rai says:

    I closed the window down when I read what the description bar said. Then I went and clicked on the link again, damn curiousity. Ewwwww. Now, can I really buy it?

    My favorite comment: “I’ve worked in MacDonald’s and Pizza Hut and I’ve been doing this for years.” Well, that will certainly help my current dieting efforts.

  8. 8
    Yumiko says:

    R-really?  Really internet?  You ACTUALLY went there? I… I just…. no words.

    And oh my god, the comments.  I am both extremely disgusted and highly amused.

  9. 9
    Troutqueen says:

    The urge to use this as a stocking stuffer with a batch of fresh-baked brownies and no explanation is amazing…


  10. 10
    Elf says:

    Y’all are welcome – lol!
    As soon as I got done literally spraying my monitor with Sprite (and then cleaning it off), I knew I had to share it with the fine folks here.  I mean, what’s more romantic than cooking with your significant other (as long as he has the means, of course).  *snorffle*

  11. 11
    eaeaea says:

    The comments below are just priceless. You can’t help but keep reading…

    Curse is now a Blessing [ No Rating ] 26 Nov 2008
    by Eddie Van Halen
    I had always viewed having 3 testicles as a curse. People would make fun of me…High School gym class was a nightmare. But no more!! I have now found a use for old number 3! This book now gives me a purpose in life, and I’m proud to have a “trifecta.

  12. 12
    Cabiria says:

    Between this and the testicle cookbook on Boing-Boing, I think the internet is trying to tell me something…

  13. 13

    This is nothing new – sea men have been doing this for years!

  14. 14
    Joanne says:

    Ahahahaha that is genius. And it seems you can actually buy the book!

  15. 15
    Ashwinder says:

    Now I’ve got a Monty Python earworm. Thanks, um, I think.

  16. 16
    Silver James says:

    I. Want. This. Book. (And not even so I can burn it. *bwahahaha*) My best friend soooo needs this in his stocking at Christmas. His wife may want to kill me but….

    All semi-joking aside, that is just so wrong on so many levels! Glad the coffee is still dripping. No chance of a keyboard/monitor accident.

  17. 17
    Rainbow Tea says:

    Gotta say I’m not surprised. Then I’ve got to say I’ve got a fit of the giggles.

    I can actually understand why it exists, and why people would actually eat… er, that. But seriously, if I go to someone’s house and they offer me something to eat and that book is on the coffee table for all to see…

  18. 18
    Tina M. says:

    See, men CAN help out in the kitchen!

  19. 19
    Erica says:

    Ahh just in time for the holidays too.  Wonder if putting it on the coffee table can keep the in-laws away.

  20. 20

    What about people on low salt diets? LOL

  21. 21
    Karibelle says:

    Ew ew ew ew ew!

  22. 22
    E says:

    As a person with an extreme phobia, I can only say I wish I never clicked the link. Just the thought of it makes my stomach burns.

  23. 23

    What Karibelle said. With a few more ew’s thrown in.

  24. 24
    Elizabeth Wadsworth says:

    I’m all for recycling, but isn’t this carrying it to extremes?  On the other hand, it doesn’t strike me as any more disgusting than the new mothers (and apparently Tom Cruise as well) who are into eating the placenta after childbirth.  And I suppose the cooking process would eliminate any concerns about STDs.  My computer wouldn’t let me read the whole article—are there actually supposed to be health benefits to eating semen?  Or is it just for the shock value?

  25. 25
    lovecow2000 says:

    I feel so soiled…  It was like the Twilight books once you start reading you can’t stop.

  26. 26

    My favorite quote from what is listed in the book, “…frozen semen can be mixed with syrup and shaved ice to make yummy ice cones.” Yummy? Seriously? That’s the adjective you choose to describe it??? And the book reminds you that if you prefer fresh semen in your recipe, please remove the pan from heat before ejaculating in it.

  27. 27
    Chrissy says:



  28. 28
    StephanieL says:

    That is just wrong on all levels.  It is amazing what people will do..  My favorite is the guy who supplemented pig sperm.  Just when you think it can’t get an worse someone inevitably finds a new level of nasty!

  29. 29
    rebyj says:

    Tina M. said on…
    11.30.08 at 06:58 AM |
    See, men CAN help out in the kitchen!

    I spewed coke all over my monitor laughing so hard over that comment LOL

  30. 30
    Tina M. says:

    And you thought you had to worry about what they might put into your food at a restaurant or fast food place.

  31. 31
    annfes says:

    I mean, didja REALLY have to?

  32. 32
    Debra says:

    Semen!  It’s not just for breakfast anymore!

    I just read the description to my dh, and he left the room he terror.  I couldn’t finish my omelette with the glorious cheese oozing out. 

    Ha ha – comes94 – Must be the semen cookbook equivalent of Baskin Robbins

  33. 33
    xssa annella says:

    i foudn the comment -i feed this tro my family- to be highly disturbing. are they really feeding this to their childern? is daddy sitting there with a big grin on his face, “hey kids. i helped cook today. why are you gagging, honey? kids? honey?”
    okay, i think it’s disgusting. maybe if this was for two people, in love, some small thing it might be okay. and if anyone was sneaking this into someone else’s food- you wouldn’t want to eat ground maggots,  or types of feces, or liver, or anything you thought was gross no matter how healhty it might be. that’s just wrong.
    overall, i just thought gross. gag. ick.

  34. 34
    J.C. Wilder says:

    Guh – I think I threw up in my throat….

  35. 35
    EJ McKenna says:

    It’s a whole world of wrong.

    “Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist.”

    Health-department-closes-down-your-restaurant interesting?
    Hep-C interesting? (or does cooking it destroy any viruses, bacteria and fungus?)
    Pass-the-sick-bag interesting?

  36. 36
    Mary Lynn says:

    Oh No…. Flan is lost to me forever! *urp*

  37. 37
    Ocy says:

    You know, just the other day I was thinking we could use a new coffee table book…

    spamword: stop64 Yes, there are 64 reasons to stop cooking with semen.  Most of which end in “ew.”

  38. 38
    ashley says:

    you can look at some of the pictures too! check out the oysters.  that’s the dirtiest looking thing I’ve ever seen.  At least the recipes only require you do use about a tablespoon of semen or so but still…. Anyway, I can see why this may be kinda cute between two lovers but please, no feed to the children.

  39. 39
    Suze says:

    Heh.  So I was laughing my butt off reading this last night, and the homophobic, gun-totin’ roomie came home and asked me what was up.  Read some key passages to him.  He said, “That better have been written by a chick!”

    Upon my confirmation that it was, indeed, written by a man, he required that I surrender the computer so that he could surf gun porn to soothe his damaged psyche.

  40. 40
    Esri Rose says:

    Who says semen is “nutritious,” apart from this nut?


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