Vampire haiku:
It’s like man-titty haiku
with sharper nipples.
I have dragged author Jennifer Rardin over to this here site, probably kicking and screaming but it’s virtual so maybe she’s got a big flamethrower aimed at me or something, in order to announce a really kickass contest. Originally I suggested that I’d give away a shiny new copy of Once Bitten, Twice Shy since I have two, but then Alex, Jennifer’s publicist, sweetened the pot and said, ‘How about a Year of Vampires?’ And I exploded with jealousy and said, ‘Hell yeah!’
Here’s the deal: in the comments to this entry today until 4:00 pm Pacific Time, post a haiku (up to two 5-7-5 stanzas, please) of your own creation about vampire heroes. Hate them? Love them? Feel the need for raunchy vamp haiku? Bring it on, and post it here.
Jennifer will judge the best one, and Orbit books will send that lucky winner A Year of Vampires – every book in Rardin’s series as they come out for the next year. That would be Once Bitten, Twice Shy
So – bring it on! Post your poetic tributes to the vampire hero here, and Jennifer will be judging your creative efforts.
Thanks and graceful curtsies to Alex Lencicki, Orbit Books, Jennifer Rardin, and vampire heroes for being every-damn-where.
One is a vampire
The other is a slayer
Whedon did it best.
Gold eyes gleam darkness
I wait to breathe death, throat bared
In you I see light
+++++++++++++++++
Soul-less wanderer
I give you my blood, my life
you make me your own
I wait, Constantine
For your return. …Now where’s
The bloody sequel?
*
Eric, Edward, Con –
Why can’t real men be like them?
Such pesky details.
*
But answer me this:
Must you really bite my neck?
I gush blood each month!
*
(The first one is a response to Robin McKinley’s [brilliant] novel, Sunshine.)
Blood, love, lust, fear, sex.
Black and white words on a page.
Makes me feel naughty.
I’m fair-skinned Irish
You’re Un-dead and pasty white
Which one needs a tan?
I never thought I’d
Learn to love the benefits
of garlic powder
Old cliche story
Same old characters written
Vampires get old
Much better to have
A hot hero who sucks blood
Than one who just sucks
Haven’t done this since high school and, well, here are my official entries:
A pulse, one beat more
Mine, sweet lover of dark blood
Good to the last drop
~~~~~
I see you, lover,
At dusk, not dawn, when you strike
With your teeth for blood
~~~~~
But this, THIS, has taken on a life of its own:
Awash in anguish
Too many rabid fan girls
Mourn sullen vampires
Only two stanzas
Must follow bitchery rules
I am stuck on suck
Bitches, I can’t stop
The rest of my days spent in
Vampire haiku hell!
I like vampires
Especially when
They fight back a bit
A Haiku I wrote while waiting for Lover Unbound to be released:
Vampires – Family
Bound together by honor
Black Dagger Brothers
Watch death unfold as
Its own act of creation.
Your blood is now mine.
~~~~~
I thought you were cool.
What is that stuck in your teeth?
Vampires need floss, too.
~~~~~
Srsly, I’m trying to cut back, but there’s still 47 minutes until curtain call. This contest has triggered a latent or heretofore unknown jones for haiku. I may have to start my own 12-step program.
Hey! It’s so not 4:00pm Pacific Time yet!
Tom Cruise is so much
Better with fangs and evil
Grin – bring it back, please!
Bela Lugosi
Was cool even in capes, and
Occult, not a cult.
I wanna vote!
Can I say lovelysalome and Angelina made me guffaw? I can has hickey?
Special mention for the rebel Bettie and her limerick.
Ack! My mother schemed,
Found “nice†Jewish boy for me:
Schlomo, the vampire.
No crucifix-up,
This deathless schmuck won’t go. Must
be staken, not Star’d.
Not exactly a poetry master, but I figured I’d try
Everything with vamps –
Teeth, Problems, love staff, ego, emo –
Is ginormous. Ouch.
(12 minutes! 12 minutes until 4 pm pacific time!)
I just want the prize:
Sink my teeth into a book,
Much better than flesh.
Desire draws me near
Ravished by moonlit cold hands
Liberated wish
ergh. i can do maths, too. *smacks head* sorry. (18 minutes. it was 18 minutes when i started. curses.)
Blood bathing a tongue
Better than rich, dark Merlot
Scarlet drunkenness
Biting thirst that kills
Or brings the life eternal
Which one will it be?