Oh Goody

Tony Catanzaro’s wife (at least, we assume so – we have no concrete proof) returns to our site with a helpful message in response to the threat her husband posted yesterday:

Amy in my husbands defense he did NOT direct this message to you or anyone else that didnt trash him.  It was directed to the few who have on these messages. He is a good man and he was very upset when he read this blog.

To the women that did not talk crap about him….this was not geared toward you. When people make fun and insult other people, especially people that they dont know, that hurts… I’m sure no one else would like it.


Ma’am, let me address you directly and publicly. First, your husband’s behavior, if indeed it was him, is not excused by either his offers to pray for us, or your defense that someone “trashed” him. Good men, to my definition, do NOT threaten perfect strangers or state that they plan to throw people in the trunk of their cars and toss us off the Belt Parkway. Good men don’t hurl insults, and they don’t throw tantrums.

Your husband, to put it bluntly, made a public ass of himself, and you’re not helping in the least. It would be my pleasure to contact the police department, his manager and agent, and my attorney, to discuss his threats further.

For the Love of God. Shut Up.



Comments are Closed

  1. 1
    Candy says:

    Lord love a duck. Have these clueless chickens NO IDEA that we’d completely forgotten about Tony and his Magical Missing Forebrain (perhaps it explains his abs—all that tissue had relocated to his abdominal area?) until they started squawking again?

    But perhaps that’s the key to the ruckus they’re kicking. They want MORE attention paid to them. Anyone submitted the link to this freakout to, say, BoingBoing yet? Because this is pretty damn hilarious.

  2. 2
    Melissa says:

    Candy’s right.  All the fuss over the RT brouhaha drove lil’ Tony right out of my mind and I was happy to forget him.  But now his wife put the idiot right back in there…………Aieeeeeeeeeeeeee!

    Off to go read the new JD Robb book. Maybe some nice murder and mayhem will get the crazies out of my brain and give me peace.  🙂

  3. 3

    This train wreck just keeps getting more and more bizarre.

    You know the difference between fiction and real life?  Fiction has to make sense.

  4. 4
    Teddy Pig says:

    I love the STFU closing I think it says it all.

  5. 5
    Teddy Pig says:

    Why does that gargoyle remind me of Alf?

    Here kitty kitty, here lunch!

  6. 6
    Mel-O-Drama says:

    Nobody likes to be teased, but most people grow up and get over it instead of providing more fodder for our entertainment. I guess this is an instance of one lamp—2 dim bulbs.

  7. 7
    Najida says:

    Holy Carp!
    This is just well, bizarre.

  8. 8
    MamaNice says:

    There is an old syaing that goes, “Remain silent and have people think you are dumb…open your mouth and remove all doubt.”

    Clearly, all doubt has been removed.

    Seriously, the comments were all made in good fun. Learn how to laugh at yourself and move on – until then, you have a very hard road ahead of you, Mr. & Mrs. Ab Man.

    The original post was amusing – but T&T’s responses have turned this into a hilarious soap opera that I can’t help watching with my mouth half open in disbelief.
    Ever seen the film “Idiocracy”? Knowing that these two perfect imbeciles have found each other, I fear for the future.

  9. 9

    It’s a conspiracy I tell you. The SB-threats actually came from someone deep within RT, in order to throw off attention from the Houston-homo scandal.  Trust no one Scully, trust no one. ^^

    Only in 3’s right?  So what’s up next?

  10. 10
    fievandfour says:

    Ever seen the film “Idiocracy”?

    Funny, my daughter was quoting it to me just last night.  Too bad it wasn’t a better movie because I think the concept was frighteningly close to the truth.

    There’s been so many good examples lately of “How to Commit Career Suicide in


    One Easy Step


    ” it’s like people are dying to win the career version of the Darwin awards.  I think I want to write this book: there’d be all the fun of wincing and watching train wrecks and none of the guilt over laughing at other people’s deaths.

  11. 11

    Gosh, I missed the original post (thanks, Tony and Mrs. Tony, for getting my curiosity up). Could someone point me to it?

  12. 12
    SB Sarah says:

    Since one thing I don’t do is make idle threats, I started looking to see if Mr. Catanzaro has an agent.

    Check it, from this interview:

    Believe it or not, I do not have an agent, 95% of the stuff I have gotten was on my own! I would send letters to magazines, or call and ask to speak to the Editor in-chief or art directors to set up meetings! It’s amazing what you can do when you are confident in the way you speak!

  13. 13
    --E says:

    Just out of curiosity… Has anyone confirmed the identity of the folks claiming to be Mr. and Mrs. Abs?

    It would not be the first time some troll was getting off on stirring people up by pretending to be someone else. or the first time some troll was getting off on stirring people up on his own behalf.

    Since we are well beyond the point where the troll can just be quietly ignored and deleted and therefore starved of the attention on which trolls feed, we are stuck with the “poison the troll food” tactic: relentless making fun of them.

    There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless.—Mark Twain

  14. 14
    SB Sarah says:

    Pam: the first post is here.

  15. 15
    SB Sarah says:

    E: When “Tony” made his original post, the IP address matched that of the posts from his wife, and a few other “Fans” to the original thread. As for the IP itself, it originated from a ISP in Kentucky. Not sure of the relative evidence of either fact. On one hand: both comments, same IP. On the other hand, Kentucky? Hur?

    Either way, yes, poison the troll food. Because if there is one thing the Smart Bitches know without a doubt, “it’s amazing what you can do when you are confident in the way you speak.”

  16. 16
    Sarah Frantz says:

    Although here it claims that he lives in NYC and has an agent, so who knows.

  17. 17
    Elaine says:

    re ISP in Kentucky

    I am fairly certain that this ISP has terms of service that would prohibit the use of this account to make threats, whether it belongs to Tony or not.  If I had someone making a threat like this to me, I would be quite tempted to inform the ISP, even if I didn’t inform the police. 

    Just saying….

  18. 18

    Oh no! I really DID think they were nice people!

    What the hell happened?

    Skin burning in hell? What the hell happened?

  19. 19

    It might be useful for someone who actually does have a connection to this guy (either through an editor or some other party) to have him contacted to see if this is actually him.  Although I have to admit why a troll would go to such lengths to hurt someone’s reputation is truly mindboggling.

  20. 20

    Well, he has a PO Box in New York. And a contact page.

    If this is his wife, she needs to leave it alone before she ruins his career. If it isn’t, we need to let the dude know that someone’s making him look bad.

    Really bad.

    Really really bad.

    I’m having visions of Whatever Happened To Baby Jane here—aging vaudeville male model, jealous/overprotective/fly-off-the-handle wife…

  21. 21

    How many carbs are in crazy soup? Because those abs won’t stay flat if somebody doesn’t cut down.

  22. 22
    EGS says:

    If his feelings were hurt over making a little fun of him, that’s one thing.  But the (albeit stupid) threats and insults are another.  I would like to think that this is a troll, but it seems to have gone farther than most trolls will take the time to invest.

  23. 23
    Qadesh says:

    Please, somebody tell me these two aren’t breeding.  *shudders at the thought*

  24. 24
    Amy E says:

    I feel so special that they came out to comment to lil’ old ME.  Wow.  No, sorry, ranting threats to my friends and ungentlemanly and bizarre behavior, even if not prefaced by “Dear Amy,” are still off-putting in the extreme.  And the insulting, childish, and then scary ranting, followed by “but instead, I’ll pray for you,” is so offensive to me, there are no words.

    So, Tony and wife, I’ll pray for you as I completely boycott you.  You don’t mind if that praying consists of lighting incense and candles at a Buddhist altar, do you?

  25. 25
    Nanna says:

    I second what Lilith said.

    Also, doesn’t this person (troll or real) understand that you don’t have to be attacked personally to get angry about this type of crap? If that were the case, no one would ever stick up for another person.

    Word: mean25. Yeah, they’re mean alright!

  26. 26
    Lauren Dane says:

    I’m so relieved he’s only threatening to kidnap and murder some of us. Whew.

  27. 27
    dl says:

    Good advice, they should take it.

  28. 28
    Little Miss Spy says:

    his letter, if it was him, was disgusting. He probably lost himself some money.. Also.. there is no excuse for being an ass. I am a bit doubtful it was him.

  29. 29
    Nicolette says:

    Um. I’m now pretty sure I like my cover models silent so as not to spoil the illusion. It’ll be hard to see him as Hot Cowboy or Sexy Pirate when all I can think is he pretty much hates people who are not eye candy, and pretty much doesn’t have what it takes to be a hero—‘tho his wife lists him as her hero on her MySpace. Awww…But of course he likes her as she’s some mighty fine eyecandy herself.

    Does she fear the day her Lady Gillette turns up missing, or she gains a few, and he files the divorce papers citing Irreconcilable Differences?

    Tony: Your honor, she’s let herself go! She’s a slob! If you don’t grant the divorce I’ll have to get a bigger truck to haul her fat butt to the pound!

    Judge: Tony, have you never heard, “Come grow old with me, the best is yet to be”?

    Tony: She a mutt, your honor. A hairy mutt.

    Basically, heroes don’t get to be heroes by calling women ugly, or valuing looks more than qualities of character. They become heroes by finding their sword and stopping Peter Petrelli from exploding. (Wait, ignore that last part.)

    Maybe the Catanzaros both have just had a lapse in judgement—that happens—but a couple minutes of thinking before they hit send would have made a huge difference.

    Him: Maybe I don’t want to insult the broads that keep me in oil to rub on my 12 pack. Nah!

    Her: My husband recently jeopardized his career by insulting several potential employers…perhaps the less said on the matter, the better. Nah!

    Um, they *are* very pretty. 🙂

  30. 30
    Charity Mullen says:

    Tony (if you did write this) now you know that no number of abs will make up for bad writing.  So maybe next time you give the credit of the sales to whom it belongs – the author.

  31. 31
    AngieZ says:

    I won’t be buying any books featuring those abs.  It will bring up my insecurities about that stray chin hair that popped up at 40. 

    Seriously though, when you are in the public eye, you will be subject to some gossip/teasing.  Hopefully this was a troll because distainful comments that stupid directed towards women (whom I assume are his primary fan base)can be very damaging.

  32. 32
    Angiez says:

    It just occured to me, maybe it wasn’t stupidy, but Roid Rage maybe?

  33. 33
    Kaite says:

    Please, somebody tell me these two aren’t breeding.

    Nah, pregnancy makes a woman fat and the hormones can cause facial hair growth in some. Can’t take that risk, now can you….

  34. 34
    erastes says:

    so…. let me get this right.

    As long as we DIDN’T comment badly on the cover/ad, we are safe from death?

    ooo kkkkk…

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