A local station here in the New York area has once again changed format. This station, 102.7, used to be The classic rock station. Then it went talk with shock jocks and crap. Then it went to “Where Christmas Lives” when two years ago or maybe three it played NOTHING but “holiday hits.” Starting. In. September.
Now it’s rebranded yet again, as “Fresh FM.” Fresh? Makes it sound like a feminine deoderant product. I didn’t quite know what “fresh” meant but on the offchance that it didn’t suck (and boy was I wrong on that one) I tuned in while bringing the SB Bird home.
Sadly, “fresh” is Today’s Soft Rock. What a pity, and hardly fresh at all.
But before I could change the station and turn on the “Songs from the Street” CD that Freebird loves, the one song that has never made a lick of sense to me came on. The one song that tortures me by taking up permanent residence in my head, refusing to leave no matter what I sing. The one song by which I can’t abide, but by which I can’t stop being fascinated.
Have you listened to the lyrics of I Want it That Way by the Backstreet Boys? This is the most evil song in existence. It makes no sense, it’s horribly gluey in my brain, and I hum it to my self for days after I hear it, trying to figure out what the hell they are talking about.
The time has come for me to soothe my confusion and finally place this song at rest among the other terrible boy band songs I don’t want to hear anymore. So, I will attempt to translate the lyrics and decipher the meaning. In my initial assumption, I am positing that a male is singing this song to a female. Give a listen:
You are my fire
The one desire
Believe when I say
I want it that way
But we are two worlds apart
Can’t reach to your heart
When you say
That I want it that way
She makes dude hot. Real hot. He desires said hotness and is pleased with the status quo.
Yet the two lovebirds are separated by geographic or cosmic distance, and he can’t invoke in her the same passionate response as she grants him (e.g. aforementioned hotness) or his poor use of grammar is intentional and he actually wants to extract her heart from her chest. Either way, he feels distant when she emits the repeating thematic phrase that builds the content of the song, though the exact meaning of the phrase “I want it that way” is unclear. Is she saying that she prefers the emotional and physical distance, or that she suspects HE wants the separation to continue, probably because he is an emotionally lazy buffoon?
[Chorus:]
Tell me why
Ain’t nothin’ but a heartache
Tell me why
Ain’t nothin’ but a mistake
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way
He beseeches her to tell him, why does she want this distance and emotional pain? It’s an error in judgment to continue in such a fashion. He doesn’t want to be forced to confront that she is not as emotionally and physically attracted to him, and does not want to bear witness to her confession that she prefers their separation. Or, maybe he doesn’t wish her to believe that he is the one who wants the distance between them, and does not want her to audibly announce that HE is the one keeping them apart.
Am I your fire
Your one desire
Yes I know it’s too late
But I want it that way
Forgetting the caution that if you have to ask, you might not get the answer you want, he returns to the theme of hotness, and wants to know if his presence causes her to want to self-immolate. He then tries a new method of persuasion with the distant girl, stating that he knows the lifespan of their relationship has likely ended, and thus attempts to reach her through use of empathy. Then, yet again, he is unclear in his meaning, perhaps for the sake of thematic consistency. Either he prefers that their relationship remain past its expiration date without hope for renewal, or he is stating a preference that she remain in a flammable state for his corporeal being.
Or, an entirely different meaning could be hidden within the poor structure (and equally poor musical value): perhaps what he wants that way is the Hershey highway. This entire musical interlude could be an attempt to persuade a girl to have anal sex – bringing new meaning to the term, “Backstreet Boy.”
All this talk of fire could mean that their repeated sexual adventures have rubbed her rectum raw, or has a raging case of ‘rroids, and he keeps nagging her to succumb to the fire and let him have it “that way.” The “Buttsecks Backstreet” theory could illuminate an entirely different, and subtle, meaning to the lyrics. Let us continue.
Tell me why
Ain’t nothin’ but a heartache
Tell me why
Ain’t nothin’ but a mistake
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way
Further consideration yields additional confusion, regardless of the interpretation applied to the referenced lyrics. Clearly, if he is describing a “heartache,” he is missing the correct orifice, and the separation he mentioned in a prior verse might be due to her telling him he’s been incorrect in his aim. Yet if “he doesn’t want to hear her say” that she suspects he is the sole party interested in teh buttsecks, then perhaps his true aim is to entice her to request the act as part of her own fiery desire, a twist on the “I want you to want me” lyrical request.
Now I can see that we’re falling apart
From the way that it used to be, yeah
No matter the distance
I want you to know
That deep down inside of me…
You are my fire
The one desire
You are
You are, you are, you are
This “bridge” verse might hold the key to understanding this confusing song. The narrator states that a previous pattern of behavior is no longer in effect, and again references the distance that is somehow interfering with his desired intentions. Then, in a change of argumentative technique, he tells the unwilling object of his desire that “deep down inside” of his physical self, she is his “fire.”
It could be that the initial “Backstreet Buttsecks” theory should be inverted for correct interpretation of the full lyrical message. If he is referencing that she is his desire, and said desire is located well within the depths of his body, then the meaning of the song might be a request for her to strap on the randy purple and fulfill his ardent yearnings.
Yet the remaining repeated choruses of the song still reference the “heartache” and “mistake” of their passion, and it is still unclear who is wanting what in what way.
So I turn this horrid puzzle over to the Bitchery. Is he requesting that she request his backdoor attentions? Or is he asking that she request the privilege of strapping on a male accessory so that he might enjoy the backstreet action? Or is this merely a poorly written lyical disaster with a tune that takes residence in my head and refuses to leave, torturing me with the enticement of meaning that dissolves the minute I focus on it?
Regardless of meaning, the song certainly makes me want to set things on fire, like all remaining copies of Backstreet Boys cds. I definitely want it that way.
What you need are the lyrics to Weird Al’s pastiche of “I Want it That Way”, “eBay”.
A used … pink bathrobe
A rare … mint snowglobe
A Smurf … TV tray
I bought on eBay
My house … is filled with this crap
Shows up in bubble wrap
Most every day
What I bought on eBay
Great!Now this song will never leave my head. Thanks a lot!
I was just about to post about Weird Al’s “eBay,” but I see I’m too late.
Weird Al for President.
Can The Annotated Works of The Fixx be far behind?
Sarah, when I can stop laughing, I’ll try to wrap my brain around these lyrics and try to parse them myself. At the moment, I’ll admit that this song makes about as much sense to me as Meatloaf’s on the theme of doing anything for love with the caveat “but I won’t do that”. Hmmm…perhaps a variation on a theme? Perhaps the Hershey Highway lovin’ is what Meatloaf won’t do, either?
Now I’m wondering if any indecipherable song about love is also on this theme…only way to know is to list some more songs like this and put them to the test. It could prove illuminating. (Or excrutiating. So often there’s such a fine line between them.)
If you go over to funnyjunk.com, they may still have the song. Instead of “I want it that way” you hear “Which Backstreet Boy is gay?” My kids sang that constantly for 2 weeks.
P.S. I believe that it’s no coincidence that another blog also discusses the butt today. It can only be the universe giving the Bitchery a clue for solving this Sphinx-like riddle.
All things considered, is it possible that the gender of the object of the singer’s affection should be reconsidered?
Verification word: where48.
Where is the question, isn’t it?
Non Engish major here, so I won’t be doing any line by line critiques—But I always had the impression that he feared the girl (his fire his desire)looking at other couples and thinking that what the other couples had was better than what he and his fire had (herpes? gonorhea?)
I hate this song, and now it’s stuck in my head. Thanks for sharing the pain.
I’m interested in following this thread and figuring out what it’s all about…and following all the links for alternate lyrics.
Oh, and fiveandfour, after being driven crazy by that Meatloaf song, I sat down with my brother’s cassette and the lyrics and figured out that the “that” that he won’t do is ever leave her. It’s a stalker song apparently. You can get Meatloaf to do anything for love except leave. “Leave!”, she pleads! “And take the Backstreet Boys with you!”
Damn you for glueing this song into my head.
BTW, my sister always thought it was about teh butt sechs! So did I.
I have never heard this song. I feel so clean and pure (and how often does that happen? LOL).
used17
Excellent critique of lyrics, Sarah.
I luv Weird Al’s lyrics even better, however.
Must get a copy of Weird Al’s.
was it just banter or did he record it on CD?
Out of Touch in Paris, but getting there… Lala Rose
Canadacole, I’m thinking sitting down with Meatloaf lyrics is really above and beyond the call of duty. There should be a medal for things like that.
Now I’m thinking I’d almost, almost go through with the buttsecks thing with Meatloaf if it meant he’d leave. That’s a hard call, though, to be sure – something only Satan could dream up as one of those “which would be worse” questions.
(I’m now shuddering and squicking all over. What the hell is wrong with my brain?)
Are we sure this song is meant for a woman? Perhaps the infamous ‘you’ refers to a member of ‘N Sync. Ah, the famous tale of star-crossed bandboy love. Maybe no one has to strap on anything.
Now I must listen to Closer by NIN to get that gooey music out of my head.
Apologies, Sarah, I’m missed the intial assumption of male to female in my first read through. I blame the lyrics for causing temporary dementia.
Weird Al really did record the Ebay song on cd, I think it’s on Poodle Hat (the cd before his latest) There’s no official video, but there are many many fan videos. This is one of the best on youtube.
Enjoy
I, too, lament the sad demise of 102.7 all those years ago. The transfer of all their jocks over to Q104.3 has demonstrated that even with the best jocks, a station’s programming makes a huge difference. Carol Miller can get out all the Led she wants, but I want greater variety the other 23.5 hours of the day.
(Actually, I love Eddie Trunk’s show. It’s all new hard rock and heavy metal, which is probably a little harder than I would normally go for, but there are some real treasures in there.)
On the Backstreet Boys: I have always assumed the buttsecks interpretation of that song. From the very first time I heard it. It is the only interpretation that makes any sense at all.
If you’ve ever see the movie Josie and the Pussycats and heard the not-quite-a-parody song “Backdoor Lover”, you’ll realize that those writers had the same interpretation.
Mike Doughty uses the refrain from this song to great effect in a live recording of “Idiot Kings”. I always thought it was hysterical, but man, once you get that bugger in your head it does not go away.
I can’t believe I even thought about this, but I think the song makes more sense if you emphasize the words in a different way than the melody leads you to. That is, instead of “I want it THAT way”, he is saying “I WANT it that way”. So- a) he wants her to be his fire and one desire b) he can’t reach her heart when she says that HE is the one who wants them to be two worlds apart c) he never wants to hear her say that SHE wants their love to be nothin’ but a heartache or mistake and d) although it is too late, he WANTS to be her fire and one desire.
What an annoying song, although I like the Weird Al version.
I always assumed a straight male singing to a lesbian. She wants it “that” way. And no matter what he cant provide it.
oh and I too despise this song.
Sadly, I happened to have been a teenybopper once, so I know that there was another version of this song that was recorded with different lyrics to the chorus that actually made a lot more sense. I can’t remember why they didn’t use it and offhand, can’t really remember the other lyrics. I could probably google it.
My vote is for, “He wants it in the butt.”
Whenever it comes on the radio, I just imagine that she’s been bugging her boyfriend for oral sex and he, being a selfish prick, never again wants to hear her say “I want it that way” when they’re getting down to business.
‘Course, that doesn’t fit with the rest of the lyrics but, damn, it amuses me.
Re Meatloaf doing anything for love… the “I won’t do that” At the end of the long version, She says, “…it’ll all turn to dust and we’ll all fall down; and sooner or later, you’ll be screwing around…” and he repeats the refrain, ” I won’t do that” Now, I have that song in my head.
Not only is Weird Al’s song on CD, you can buy it on Napster and iTunes.
Okay, my confirmation code is see69. This gives an entirely new interpretation to the lyrics.
Sarah, honey, please don’t EVER listen to “A Whiter Shade of Pale.” I learned long ago, when I first became the Number One Fan of the Hardest Working Man in Show Business (God bless and keep him, wherever his black ass is now after all that toting around), sometimes you just have to surrender to the infection without understanding the bacillus.
“Regardless of meaning, the song certainly makes me want to set things on fire, like all remaining copies of Backstreet Boys cds. I definitely want it that way.”
I laughed hard and now everyone knows it’s not work I’m doing on my computer.
Damn you, SB, damn you!
Six days after your post, I’m still humming this song. Thanks, SB Sarah.
Hubby said the same thing last night – “That song will be stuck in my head for the next two weeks. Thanks a lot, Sarah.”
Heh. It’s stuck in my head, too.
Just saw this, http://www.leasticoulddo.com/comic/20070219 and thought how appropriate it was for this discussion.