Bitchin' Blog Posts
Whose Mullet Collection Reigns Supreme? KristieJ vs. Sarah
by SB Sarah | by SB Sarah | April 08, 2010 | Thursday at 10:38 am | 119 CommentsThere are a lot of romance bloggers and book bloggers and I’ve met many many people since Candy and I started Ye Olde Bitchery. Among the very best of the best is KristieJ. KristieJ is amazing: she’s funny and sharp and witty and such a fan of the genre. She’s easily one of my very favorite people to visit with when we’re at conferences.
But not this year. THIS YEAR it is ON. KristieJ has called into question my ability to identify a mullet. WHA-WHA-WHAAAT?! I live in New Jersey! I grew up in Pittsburgh! When I met him, HUBBY had a mullet, albeit a curly one. I read romance novels and have amassed quite a collection of be-mulleted man-titty cover art - HOW could I not be able to truly identify a mullet?!
KristieJ is not impressed. She is from Canada, land of hockey. Her sons were athletes, and she knows from mullet, she says. She has collected a…dare we say… millieux of mullets and the gauntlet has been thrown.
So we devised a contest, and YOU must pick the winner, and more importantly, the loser.
Below the fold here and over at KristieJ’s Ramblings on Romance are a selection of mullets. The very best mullet pics we could find from our respective countries. Your job: pick whose collection of mullets reigns supreme. The wager? Whoever loses has to wear this wig at both RT AND RWA 2010 in public for at least two hours, preferably in the bar.
Oh, yes. It is ON. Mullet identification is ON THE LINE, to say nothing of national pride. It’s bigger than US Olympic Hockey, it’s bigger than anything. It is US vs. CANADA, Sarah vs. KristieJ: THE MULLET SHOWDOWN. Remember: when you pick the winner, you pick the person who Does Not Have to Wear the Mullet.
One of us is going to be mullet-champion, and the other will be be-mullet-ed. Bring it on, y’all, and help us declare Whose Mullet Collection Reigns Supreme?
I must defend the American Mullet, a hairstyle of pride and honor and bombs bursting in air.
First, a little hometown pride: Pittsburgh Penguins Mario Lemieux, and Jaromir Jagr, sporting absolutely majestic hockey mullets. WHY the Stanley Cup doesn’t have one, I couldn’t possibly tell you. but this alone demonstrates my understanding of the mullet millieux.
Now, the mullet is the unofficial haircut of New Jersey and there are plenty of examples from the fine Jersey shore. It’s a pity I don’t have a few weeks of hot weather, a camera, and some time at the beach, because I could get some live action mullet shots that would put this contest to bed in a hurry. Pity we don’t have showdowns about back hair, because there’s plenty of that, too.
But let’s move on - to neighboring Pennsylvania. John Kruk, formerly of the Philadelphia Phillies, combines that fine mullet of wavy hair with a beard:
There are few things better than a baseball mullet, really… except when that mullet is worn by a man whose name is Randy Johnson. Behold: it has style, grace, and movement! A well conditioned mullet is a beautiful thing.
Lest you doubt the state of the Randy Johnson mullet, here’s another picture of it, sans ballcap:
In other parts of the world, there’s just hockey and baseball mullets. Here in the USA, we have… MacGyver Mullets, worn by television stars and romance novel cover models alike:
The US also boasts many, many celebrity mullets, like Kevin Federline, who combined cornrows and mullets and… I really don’t quite know what to say about that.
There’s the amazing hard-rocking badass mullet… when the man who wears it is so cool, the mullet is entirely excused:
But what puts the American Mullet over the top in terms of sheer beauty is that we, here in the US of Awesome, boast the King of All Mullets, Mr. Billy Ray Cyrus.
There’s the Frost and Tip Cyrus Mullet:
And, for bonus romance action, the shirt open, chest-hair-regrowing, three-foot-long mullet of amazingness. Cyrus style is truly a US Original.
Filed: General Bitching
Kim in Hawaii said on 04.08.10 at 11:41 AM • [link]
Great idea for a freindly cross the border rivalry! NAFTA would be proud. Too bad I cannot attend RT in Columbus, but I look forward to see the mullet wig at RWA!
Vuir said on 04.08.10 at 12:20 PM • [link]
I need another example of the hard rock mullet. I can’t tell how short the hair is, as it seems to be gelled down.
Maggie P. said on 04.08.10 at 12:58 PM • [link]
I never realized how diverse the mullet is in the US, that makes it a clear win IMHO.
Ros said on 04.08.10 at 01:26 PM • [link]
I couldn’t really judge the mullets apart but I wanted Sarah to wear the wig, so that determined my vote!
eaeaea said on 04.08.10 at 01:36 PM • [link]
Kristie’s ‘greasy mullet’ on a pink-lycra-wearing wrestler WINS!
The only time when wrong is right.
spamwor - trial25 - a trial for my burning retinas…
Cris said on 04.08.10 at 02:09 PM • [link]
A clear win for Team Bitch/ Team America. The Canadian hockey mullets were impressive, but we have the King of Mullets, Billy Ray - no contest.
KristieJ said on 04.08.10 at 02:15 PM • [link]
Thank you!! While Sarah certainly gets points for Billy Rae, I think a greasy mullet on a pink-lycra wearing wrestler tops Bill *g*. I went YES!!! when I found that pic *laughing* and then the shaking started.
SB Sarah said on 04.08.10 at 02:23 PM • [link]
I think there might be a greasy pink mullet vs. Billy Ray Cyrus showdown on the line here.
GO TEAM USA!
DS said on 04.08.10 at 02:27 PM • [link]
I CANT MAKE UP MY MIND! While a bit south of Pittsburgh—quite a bit south, I too live in the land of the mullet (and the hairy back and shoulders) But those Canadian examples have a je ne sais quoi, ya know.
JJ said on 04.08.10 at 02:28 PM • [link]
Perhaps it is my national pride (heh heh), but I will have to claim Sarah as the winner. The sheer diversity of mulletry counts for something! We have hockey mullet, baseball mullet, wannabe-celebrity mullet, rockstar mullet, country music singer mullet…
Let us not forget Jersey Shore mullets, which are really their own species. I never knew! I’m from southern California. Yes, we really are that tanned and good-looking ALL THE TIME. (Ha.)
joannef said on 04.08.10 at 02:31 PM • [link]
Really tough choice. Mario Lemieux cancels himself out for being on both Mullet Team Canada and Mullet Team USA. Going by sheer numbers, USA wins hands-down due to the far greater population. On creativity, 2 to 1 edge to team Canada - Wendel Clark’s crew-cut mullet plus Bret Hart’s greasy, man-titty mullet narrowly beats Federline’s more creative (IMO) cornrow mullet. For global mullet influence, gotta go with team USA. McGyver’s mullet is probably still seen in syndication in dozens of countries, and who can forget (no matter how we try) Cyrus’ huge flash-in-the-pan doing the “Achy-Breaky” dance. I’ll have to go 51%/49% for Canada for having the classiest mullet wearer (an oxymoron if I ever heard one) listed by either team - Wayne Gretzky.
KristieJ said on 04.08.10 at 02:32 PM • [link]
But HE’S not wearing PINK LYCRA like my guy is ;-)
Go CA-NA-DA!!
MicheleKS said on 04.08.10 at 02:40 PM • [link]
U-S-A!!!
I’m from the Deep South and the mullet still rains supreme here. Personally, I don’t think anything can match what I call a redneck mullet.
Cara McKenna / Meg Maguire said on 04.08.10 at 02:41 PM • [link]
Just wanted to chime in and say Belgium deserves a little shout out for their first son Van Damme’s jerry curled mulletude in the amazing film Hard Target. JCVD also punches a rattlesnake in this film, and it features a Cajun Wilford Brimley as a moonshine brewer. Definitely my favorite film from the cinéma mulletté genre.
Saundra said on 04.08.10 at 02:42 PM • [link]
I don’t think Dee Snyder counts- the hard rock mullet you have here, is actually his (all over) long hair, pulled back in the front to keep it off his face. While the style is definitely mullet-esque, it’s not really a mullet. You can also see this permutation on Lars Ulrich from Metallica and Slash from Guns & Roses. On stage, all the hair is wild and free, offstage, the front is pulled back so they can see.
That said, American Mullet is plainly the winner. To have this many fine distinctions shows we have come a long way in mullet science and deserve to be the glorious winners! (Or losers…)
Darlene Marshall said on 04.08.10 at 02:45 PM • [link]
American mullet all the way. It makes a lovely dip, and fried up with a side of slaw is some good eating. Canadian whitefish just can’t compare.
Oh, wait…we’re not talking about fish?
Never mind. The Yanks still win.
Bibliophile said on 04.08.10 at 02:54 PM • [link]
The American mullet wins hands down, for sheer length and variety.
Sewicked said on 04.08.10 at 02:56 PM • [link]
I’m sorry, Kristie, that pink-lycra-wearing-mullet is a strong contender and I did have to deduct points for Dee Snyder (he has long hair pulled back), nonetheless, I had to go with Sarah on this one. The sheer variety of mullets, not just hockey players makes a huge statement.
I’m still not sure what the statement is or if we should be proud of it. And I don’t want to know. Really. Even if you know, don’t tell me.
serpentj said on 04.08.10 at 02:59 PM • [link]
And thanks to the television show “Supernatural” we have the… memorable description of the mullet as:
“Business in the front, party in the back”
That alone might lead me to vote for the American mullet.
Cassie said on 04.08.10 at 03:02 PM • [link]
While I concur with KristieJ that the term mullet is sometimes used incorrectly here at the Bitchery, I must side with Sarah in this mullet show-down - she certain brought the business-up-front-party-out-the-back to the table here.
Susanna Kearsley said on 04.08.10 at 03:10 PM • [link]
Sarah, hometown pride notwithstanding, you can’t use either Mario Lemieux or Jaromír Jágr .. Great mullets, I agree, but Lemieux is as Canadian as I am, and Jágr is a Czech.
If you want to have a Pittsburgh touch, you might be able to claim this .. http://bit.ly/b4sb9h
But then I, out of national pride, would have to counter with this .. http://bit.ly/aW1LbW
Which, in my view, puts Team Canada in front!
closetcrafter said on 04.08.10 at 03:10 PM • [link]
Sorry, Sarah by geography alone, wins.
2 comments——
1. I reside in Pittsburgh and while ice skating with my children 2 weeks ago, saw no less than 5 mullets at the rink. 2 were a father/son combo, both wearing Penguin jerseys.
2. Sarah, you may not have lived in Pgh in the mid 90’s, but if you did, do you recall the Jaromir/Fantasy’s clock on WDVE? Everytime I see a pic of him, I think of his heavily accented ” I love Fontosees” they used to plug in at commercial breaks.
Shaheen said on 04.08.10 at 03:12 PM • [link]
Hmmmm…. Not sure if the Federline do strictly qualifies as a mullet. And rock star dude’s definitely does not.
Thus despite the true excellence of the Billy Rae Cyrus and McGyver Mullets - which are mullets to silence all mullets, I felt I had to vote for KristieJ over on her site, on the grounds of disqualification. (Unfortunately, I then came back here and accidentally voted for Sarah - so my vote is now completely irrelevant!!!)
Am I the only one who thinks that on a lass the wig won’t look quite so repellent?
audience34 - you will have an audience of at least 34 to the mullet-wearing drinks party!
Julia Spencer-Fleming said on 04.08.10 at 03:13 PM • [link]
I’m still trying to recover from the fact that there exists a mullet wig. A WIG. Cut into a MULLET. Why, dear Lord, why?
Babs said on 04.08.10 at 03:32 PM • [link]
& Billy Ray’s frost and tip cinches the win for Sarah! Or at least, it should…
*shudder*
Jill Sorenson said on 04.08.10 at 03:34 PM • [link]
OMG I almost died laughing. I loved the original post at KristieJ’s, and her Canadian mullets are compelling, but I’m firmly on Team USA!! You can’t beat Billy Rae.
Amelia said on 04.08.10 at 03:42 PM • [link]
Billy Ray wins it for Team USA hands down with his song “I Want My Mullet Back”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vs8Xq8bqrPA
Niveau said on 04.08.10 at 03:45 PM • [link]
Dude, Mario Lemieux is OURS. He’s Canadian, baby! Stop stealing our mullets! *votes Canadian, partly out of pride and mainly because of Thornton*
SheaLuna said on 04.08.10 at 03:53 PM • [link]
Kristie J did a most excellent job representing the Canadian mullet, but NOBODY does mullet like McGyver does mullet! Nobody. You win, Sarah!
hot62: The McGyver mullet is 62 kinds of hot!
kinipelak66 said on 04.08.10 at 04:06 PM • [link]
Ah, the mesmerizing combo of the Lemieux-Jagr mullets reminds me of my yinzer youth…
Jean said on 04.08.10 at 04:13 PM • [link]
MacGyver and Billy Ray vs. Elvis Stoyko—how do I decide between them? In the end, I think the sheer numbers of excellent U.S. mullets must win out ...
PK said on 04.08.10 at 04:14 PM • [link]
I dunno… Kristie J was BRINGING IT with the greasy pink and the shiny black mullets, and I started to sweat when the Great One showed but Billy Ray, in all his glorious mullet-actiousness brings it home. Sarah, FTW!!
Kalen Hughes said on 04.08.10 at 04:20 PM • [link]
*gasp* Am I the only one who wons The Mullet: Hairstyle of the Gods by Barney Hoskyns and Mark Larson? Say it isn’t so!
Anna the Piper said on 04.08.10 at 04:20 PM • [link]
As a MacGyver fan, I am honorbound to vote for Team USA on the strength of Mac’s hair alone. :D
Theresa Meyers said on 04.08.10 at 04:23 PM • [link]
Sorry, have to vote for Sarah’s collection on this one. Even given stripping out the two hockey players that are questionable, the cornrows and the Dee Snyder’s rock hair, it’s still has a lot of variety.
And she didn’t even include Jeff Foxworthy of comedian of You Might Be A Redneck fame, David Hasslehoff when he was in Knight Rider or the most glorious mullet-maddness of Mel Gibson in the Lethal Weapon movies (which actually, I painfully admit, encouraged me to give my own hubby a perm in college so his mullet would be curly in the back…oh the pictures. The children still roll with laughter.) Don’t suppose you could post any follow up pictures of the Hoff or Gibson???
Missy Ann said on 04.08.10 at 04:27 PM • [link]
My mother in law had that picture of Mario & Jaromir tacked up inside one of her kitchen cabinets. Ah memories…
And I gotta call BS on Dee’s mullet. He hair is all one length and that’s a faux mullet created by pulling the front & sides back into a pony tail.
Gadz, this is the kind of stuff I feel the need to post?! lol
Scrin said on 04.08.10 at 04:30 PM • [link]
Actually, the winner of this contest should have to wear that wig. Having that many mullet pictures is a SHAME.
Which is why I voted for Kirstie, because while Sarah has some better and more varied pictures…Well, let’s go on and give the queen her crown so she can wear it in public.
SusannaKearsley said on 04.08.10 at 04:35 PM • [link]
Found an even better example of the Kiefer Sutherland Mullet Photo, with a caption:
http://bit.ly/bM65pa
I’m now questioning, though, with the others, whether this is really a contest we ought to want to win?
StacieH4 said on 04.08.10 at 04:40 PM • [link]
I gotta go with Sarah’s group simply because Billy Ray is the one true embodiment of a mulletted-male. He captures the wit, talent, and personality that I expect to find in someone sporting that hairstyle.
Plus, MacGyver is a senitmental favorite being RDA is from Minnesota and was on television during my hormone-fogged teenaged years. I still have a major crush on that man.
ReganB said on 04.08.10 at 04:49 PM • [link]
I have put myself on team USA, as well, due to the awesomeness that is Billy Rae, I do have to give props to Kristy, for she did have a point in her original post. That wasn’t a mullet, Sarah! It was a very nice longish haircut and she was right to call you out! Fer shame! Come clean, admit your mistake. We’ve all had those days of too much catty, not enough vodka. Besides - you do have the better mullet collection.
lijakaca said on 04.08.10 at 04:53 PM • [link]
I had to vote for Kristie’s collection - Wendel being the first pic cinched it right there. I mean, just the age of the photos proves that Canada pretty much invented the mullet!
There’s also Kim Mitchell who could be used as a Canadian rock star mullet representative.
Now I’m thinking of all the possible celebrity mullets you could show, this is not a good start to my day…
Theresa Meyers said on 04.08.10 at 04:58 PM • [link]
And here are few Sarah didn’t even include:
Mel Gibson
http://www.ladamania.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/gibson.jpg
Tobey Keith
http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000001DXU.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg
The Hoff
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/__fOYh5zaBsQ/SD7WDukjuxI/AAAAAAAAASs/Ct4e_3ds0Tk/s400/david-hasselhoff.jpg
But I’m beginning to wonder *cough*, if Susanna isn’t right. Is winning a good thing?
Ann said on 04.08.10 at 04:59 PM • [link]
It’s SB Sarah! Come on. You can’t *just* rely on ice skating. :-)
quichepup said on 04.08.10 at 05:11 PM • [link]
USA! USA! USA!
I want eye bleach for that Toby Keith picture. The country music mullet is alive and well here. Mullets are not just for men either, I saw a whole mom-dad-son mullet trifecta at Wal-Mart the other day. It amazed and terrified me.
I almost had to give it to Canada for Bret Hart and Kiefer but Billy ray’s highlights out-cheesed them both.
scribblingirl said on 04.08.10 at 05:12 PM • [link]
I’m sorry but maybe the US has more famous Mullets but holy crap, here in Toronto, I see Mullets every time I leave the house. There are Mullets coming out of this pub called the Brigadoon (a Mullet name, if I ever heard one) my hubby’s best friend STILL has a Mullet (these guys are 47 years old). Mullets are like trees up here in Canada, eh?
Theresa Meyers said on 04.08.10 at 05:22 PM • [link]
BTW, I’m a little disappointed in the mullet wig up for wearing. That is not a deluxe mullet wig…this is a deluxe mullet wig. http://www.scavengeinc.com/deluxe-mega-mullet-wig-more-colors-available-p-2827.html
And what’s even scarier is I saw a dude with this exact hair cut in person strolling through our local Fred Meyer, a case of beer under each arm, wearing a sleeveless red plaid shirt over a wife beater tank top that barely covered his beer belly, and sporting a full beard to go with said mullet.
aimee said on 04.08.10 at 05:29 PM • [link]
No one, and I repeat NO ONE matches the strength of the Billy Rae redneck mullet. MacGyver is the smart, sexy alternative. And Mel Gibson
Jody W. said on 04.08.10 at 05:33 PM • [link]
Right—the trick about a mullet is that it has to be a deliberate haircut, not just a standard cut that’s grown out a bit too much. Even my short haircut can look a bit mullety if I haven’t had time to get to the salon, and it is NOT A MULLET! No no no. So I do agree—sometimes mullets on covers here are incorrectly identified.
And while I appreciate the businessman mullets being sported by Team Canada—as mullets tend to appear more frequently on, let’s just say NON business suited types here in the States—I do think the Team USA collection is superior.
That being said, I think they should take turns wearing the wig or both wear a wig. There’s no winner and loser in this competition, there’s only the glory of the mullet.
Tracy said on 04.08.10 at 05:37 PM • [link]
Sheesh! If Elvis Stojko was sporting a mullet, then SBSarah should have been able to claim Kirk Cameron on Growing Pains. Same hairstyle. And I question whether that truly was a mullet.
Curly, greasy mullet takes me back to those delightful high school years when I had a crush on a guy with a curly, greasy mullet. Back in those days we loved mullets! Wonder when they’re coming back in style…. I could use a good laugh.
KayAnna Kirby said on 04.08.10 at 05:38 PM • [link]
The Mullett Wig is awesome!!! I don’t know if Kevin Federline should be classified as a mullett. Maybe if he left the ends of his braids out.
Danielle Yockman said on 04.08.10 at 05:39 PM • [link]
Besides the fact that I am an American…I have to go with the superior quality of mullets provided by Sarah. I find some of Kristi’s samples to be questionable in their true mulletness. Namely the much mentioned pink spandex example and the two ice skaters. Whereas Sarah only had one hard-rockin’ mullet that was questionable. Beyond the pictures, having grown up in the deep south where the mullet, not unlike the War of Northern Aggression, will live on forever.
Spam Wrod: fear49 - oh yeas on a scale of 1 to 10 my mullet fear is a 49!
Kismet said on 04.08.10 at 05:51 PM • [link]
The Mullet is alive and well in the ‘Burgh. I saw a guy the other day sporting one complete with the shaved designs on the sides ala “Jersey Shore”. I also saw a little boy in camo Tshirt and shorts with the front completely shave and the most fabulous “rat tail” mullet tied back. Haven’t seen that one since grade school.
ev said on 04.08.10 at 05:52 PM • [link]
Nobody beats Billy Ray for the ultimate in mullets!
Melissa said on 04.08.10 at 05:52 PM • [link]
Who could miss Dog The Bounty Hunter. After Billy Ray, he was the next one to come to mind
http://www.dogthebountyhunter.com/
Stand in any Wal-Mart in the south and probably within 15 minutes, you will have at least one walk in….
Melissa said on 04.08.10 at 05:52 PM • [link]
I’m afraid I had to vote for the US mullets—the CAN photos were really more what I’d call baby-mullets. For classic mullet, Billy Ray really reigns supreme.
Of course, for modern day sexay mullets, there’s no better representative that Dog the Bounty Hunter. I especially like the spiky mohawk-tude going on in front. Dog The Bounty Hunter sexay pose
Brigit said on 04.08.10 at 05:56 PM • [link]
MacGyver mullet - win!
Plus, the pink-spandex guy has just long hair, not a mullet.
So, my vote goes to the USA mullets… ;)
Kristina said on 04.08.10 at 06:14 PM • [link]
Mullets are hot sexy time. You really need to peep some of the hot south of the border Mexi-Mullets that are so very prevelant here in San Antonio. Fiesta is next week and I just KNOW the Conjunto Music and plastic longneck beers bring out all the hibernating Mullet-heads
Kristina said on 04.08.10 at 06:25 PM • [link]
We need some female mullets in here too people. Classic Wynona Judd and Rosey O’Donnel? My sisters!!!!
Kelly S said on 04.08.10 at 06:29 PM • [link]
MacGyver!!! Loves me MacGyver. Totally voting for USA because of him.
Plus, other commentors are right, USA has way more “good”? mullets that Canada.
Ginny said on 04.08.10 at 07:05 PM • [link]
Your collection of mullets is definitely better, but I agree with her that sometimes you are too liberal with the term when critiquing covers.
Carin said on 04.08.10 at 07:26 PM • [link]
I’ve got to go with the US collection being better. It was kind of a tie for me until Billy Ray. There’s just no competition there!
Stella said on 04.08.10 at 07:51 PM • [link]
There is no beating the U.S.A. with the great American mulleted heros; Billy Ray and MacGyver!
U.S.A.!
U.S.A.!
U.S.A.!
Though did the Canadians forget about their true Mulleted hero; Rowsdower?!! I may be the only MST3k fan who remembers this though! :)
http://www.rowsdower.com/rowsdower.jpg
KathyB said on 04.08.10 at 07:55 PM • [link]
Oh my, K-fed vs. West Greasy mullet… being a southern MD girl (home of many, many mullets) I have to say that K-fed wins (and I don’t even want to know what he was thinking)... GO SARAH!
Robin L. Rotham said on 04.08.10 at 07:57 PM • [link]
The American mullets win hands down, but I bet Chuck Norris’s mullet would kick all their asses.
Robin L. Rotham said on 04.08.10 at 08:01 PM • [link]
Ahem. Let’s try that again:
The American mullets win hands down, but I bet Chuck Norris’s mullet would kick all their asses.
Elise Logan said on 04.08.10 at 08:17 PM • [link]
Hm. While, technically, the MacGyver mullet may be an extension of the hockey mullet (by virtue of RDA’s hockey propensity), the sheer pervasiveness of mulletness in the US (ice and non-ice sports, wrestling, Hollywood, music, etc.) as opposed to Canada (in which the mullet seems to be limited to ice sports and wrestlers) makes the US version a winner. Though, to be fair, I think Australia has a serious contender in the Rick Springfield 1980s mullet.
PS - spamword is distance33. As in, I prefer to be 33 miles from the nearest mullet.
Brooks*belle said on 04.08.10 at 08:36 PM • [link]
No contest.
Billy Ray and MacGyver are the best that mullet-world has to offer. Sarah’s the queen. And as much as I’d LOVE to see her in that Secksy wig, I can’t vote against my conscience.
Oh and I grew up in the south, the capital of mullet-land. Where some WOMEN wear mullets still to this day. Mullet is an art form so we live with it and only snicker behind closed doors.
Katherine C. said on 04.08.10 at 08:55 PM • [link]
A valiant effort from KristieJ, but I don’t think there’s any question that Sarah (and, by extension, the US of Awesome) is the clear winner. I mean, the Canadian mullets were awful, but they have nothing on the tragedy that is the ever-popular (and varied) American mullet. Sarah should win on sheer variety alone, even if she didn’t pull out the big guns with the femullet. Plus, we do have the undisputed king on our side. On the Mario debate: Sorry Canada, but he belongs to Pittsburgh. He came to us willingly, he’s ours, and you can’t have him back!! As for the origin of the mullet, if Canada wants to claim it, have at it, but I see evidence (sadly) pretty much every day, that here in the US we’ve perfected the art.
Jessica C said on 04.08.10 at 08:56 PM • [link]
Sarah hands down! What a variety! (I couldn’t help but think some of the Canadian hockey players hardly counted as mullets, though they do…)
I have to agree with K’s comment on that previous book cover has a long all over look, rather not cut for a while than a mullet…
The pink greasy guy looks like long hair all over to me too.
Hey, what about the shag? Isn’t that a female mullet? (The MacGyver look!) =)
Entire69: I’ll get on that!
Lily said on 04.08.10 at 09:06 PM • [link]
I nearly went with Kristie because I think Canada beats the US for sheer number of mullets currently in use by its citizenry. But the mullet wouldn’t be what it is today without Billy Ray and thus my vote goes to Team USA!
Though admittedly, Sarah lost a few points for the absence of George Clooney and John Stamos in her lineup. They are superb examples of the US mullet…
jane said on 04.08.10 at 09:08 PM • [link]
as impressive as southern mullets are, you do not get uglier than a Quebecois mullet. there is a woman at the bus terminus who, from the front, has closely cropped curly greying hair. then she turns around and she’s a got a foot long tail of bright yellow curly hair growing from the nape of her neck. I stare every time, I want to take pictures of her. I mean, Americans had mullets in the 80s but Canadians? we STILL have mullets!
Sewicked said on 04.08.10 at 09:17 PM • [link]
Oh dear, sweet, naive Jane. I see mullets every day & twice on Sunday (which is idiom for ‘can’t escape the blasted things, they’re everywhere’). I’m half-expecting to see a dog with a mullet any day now.
antispam word: nearly96, I wish that there were only nearly 96 of the things, w/in a 15 minute radius.
Dayle said on 04.08.10 at 09:17 PM • [link]
You’re missing two classic Canadian mullets:
Geddy Lee of Rush
Lawrence Gowan
Both from the fabulous Rate My Mullet website!
Sel said on 04.08.10 at 10:22 PM • [link]
May I present the arch-bogan Poiter. (Otherwise known as Eric Bana before he was famous.)
Lucy Woodhull said on 04.08.10 at 11:25 PM • [link]
Well, my lady boner just wilted.
No question: Smart Bitches FTW! You had me at the cringing and the MacGyver.
JennKnight said on 04.09.10 at 12:19 AM • [link]
Billy Ray has the mullet that will not quit, and MacGyver…oh my. RDA + mullet + can defuse a bomb with chewing gum, a shoestring, and a piece of duct tape?
The US is the clear winner.
KristieJ said on 04.09.10 at 12:45 AM • [link]
Dang!! The problem with a job that is busy is….it keeps me busy and thus no time to wade in and battle for the Canadian Mullet. To Theresa who brought up Mel Gibson - he can’t count. His was an Aussie version - he’s not American but Australian - where I long to go - not to see Mel though.
And I see Eric Bana was mentioned - he’s also another Aussie.
And Tracy - I did find other pics of Elvis with mullet - but I was going for the whole package *g* - including the shiny skating duds.
LiJuun said on 04.09.10 at 12:54 AM • [link]
Oh, hon. You started your challenge with a point to the enemy. Mario Lemeiux is Canadian, dear, and Jaromir Jagr cannot count for a US mullet because he is, in fact, from Czechoslovakia. So I had to vote against you mainly because of that.
But I’m sure you’ll rock that mullet!
Sharon said on 04.09.10 at 12:54 AM • [link]
No one beats Billy Ray Cyrus in the mullet challenge!
SuperWendy said on 04.09.10 at 01:08 AM • [link]
Like I mentioned over at KristieJ’s - this is impossible! Canada gave us The Great One and Barry Melrose (whose mullet and wardrobe are illegal in at least 23 U.S. states) - but dang we Americans have Billy Ray Cyrus and you just had to throw in a picture of Krukie didn’t you? Impossible!
Either way, this contest is full of awesome. And I’m not just saying that because I’ll be at RWA and will be able to point and laugh at the loser :)
cories said on 04.09.10 at 01:11 AM • [link]
Mel Gibson counts for team USA because he was born in NY, Peekskill I believe. I have to go with Sarah on her variety of mullets in different professions. Plus, I have a soft spot in my heart for MacGyver as he was the reason an impressionable young me went for an engineering degree (although I never did learn anything about stopping a car with shoelaces).
ma said on 04.09.10 at 01:21 AM • [link]
Gotta vote for Kristie, her mullets look like the ones I remember in my youth over her in ye olde England :P
Jennifer said on 04.09.10 at 01:29 AM • [link]
It’s hard to be KFed.
Jennifer said on 04.09.10 at 01:30 AM • [link]
Der, I mean beat KFed.
KristieJ said on 04.09.10 at 01:37 AM • [link]
Oh - I really am laughing at that typo error!! There are so many ways one could respond :-)
Suze said on 04.09.10 at 02:02 AM • [link]
This! And that’s how this whole thing started, was it not? The hair on that book cover wasn’t even vaguely mullettish.
I havent read all the comments yet, so I don’t know about anyone else, but IMHO, mullets don’t necessarily look any better on women.
And finally, Kiefer’s Lost Boys mullet for the Canadian win!
wendy said on 04.09.10 at 02:46 AM • [link]
Had to go with KristieJ’s nonchalant, hip-thrusting mullet on skates.
M E 2 said on 04.09.10 at 03:02 AM • [link]
Have to vote for KristieJ based solely on the fact that whatever it is Kevin Federline is sporting, it is NOT a mullet. Sorry.
spam-a-lot : longer34 ...... exactly! the back must be 34 inches LONGER than the front to be a true mullet! :-D
Susan Reader said on 04.09.10 at 03:07 AM • [link]
Sorry, I don’t think Dee Snider counts—that’s just long hair, and I don’t think Federline makes the cut either—I don’t think you can cornrow a properly structured mullet.
But with MacGyver and Billy Ray Cyrus, how can we lose?
Spamchecker: both83 When they’re both 83, will they still be sporting mullets?
Lisa Kessler said on 04.09.10 at 05:52 AM • [link]
Ha! You made me blow milk out my nose and I wasn’t even drinking milk! LOL
And didn’t MacGyver and Billy Ray invent the amazing mullet???
How can Canada ever hope to compete, eh? :)
Lisa :)
Head 65? Ok I’m not mature enough for this one… :-P
AngelFire said on 04.09.10 at 05:59 AM • [link]
I noticed that the canadian version are a little lacking in “the party in the back”. Party in the USA! lol
Karen said on 04.09.10 at 07:48 AM • [link]
Oh, man it SOOOO close. Kristy almost won it all with Elvis Stojko’s picture. But SB Sarah had 2 Bill Ray Cyrus. Sarah won…by a hair.
and really “other69”....WHAT other 69????
Melissa Blue said on 04.09.10 at 08:19 AM • [link]
My vote goes to Lily. George Clooney with a mullet beat Billy Ray and the pink Lycra mullet. IMHO.
Plus, it would be beyond awesome to have Sarah and Kristie J wearing Theresa’s version of the mullet wig.
Amanda Downum said on 04.09.10 at 09:09 AM • [link]
I have to agree that K-Fed and Dee Snyder don’t count toward mullets. But between Billy Ray and MacGuyver and the fact that I spent the 90s in Texas, I may still have to vote for Sarah.
Bronte said on 04.09.10 at 09:55 AM • [link]
I see that Mel Gibson and Eric Bana have both been mentioned and named as Australians. This opens up the fact that Australia leaves the USA and Canada both for dead in the mullet stakes. Just go to a rugby league match in parramatta and every second man (if not more) has absolute killer Mullets. My Brother grew his hair for a year just so he could he could cut the filthiest mullet he could and wear it for a week. There are some very special photos of that occasion.
Cath Bilson said on 04.09.10 at 10:34 AM • [link]
If we’re going to divert down the Australian sidetrack, I can’t resist presenting this one of Russell Crowe with the honest-to-God comment “My mullet is like having a dead Koala on my back.”
WTF???
http://www.metro.co.uk/showbiz/332560-russell-my-mullets-like-a-dead-koala
Hairball1 said on 04.09.10 at 12:14 PM • [link]
The sheer volume of cheating and misidentification on the American side forces me to hand this to Kristie. As many have pointed out, Lemieux and Jagr are not American. Mel Gibson, in the comments, also not American. Dee Snyder, not a mullet.
So I have to agree with Kristie: Sarah, not only do you struggle to identify a mullet, you also apparently struggle to identify an American!
SB Sarah said on 04.09.10 at 02:22 PM • [link]
Now see here, hairball. (SNORT)
I’m well aware that Jagr and Lemieux are not American. However, they were part of the Stanley Cup winning wonderbunch that was the Pittsburgh Penguins. I say if you help a team win multiple championships, you get honorary local, if not state/federal citizenship.
I think most Pittsburgers who witnessed the Era Of Lord Staney And The Accompanying Mullets would claim them both as “One of us.” Or “One of yinz,” depending on whom they were talking to.
But this gives me an idea for next year: KristieJ vs. Sarah: The Mario Lemieux tug of war. We each grab and arm and pull until someone wins.
KristieJ said on 04.09.10 at 02:34 PM • [link]
*laughing* But hey!!! That give you an unfair advantage. You grew up in Pittsburg and probably have connections!! And I’m not a Quebequois so I don’t have that, that I can use for leverage.
megalith said on 04.09.10 at 04:58 PM • [link]
What is it about hockey and soccer that brings out the mullet?
Maisey Yates said on 04.09.10 at 05:30 PM • [link]
I can’t believe you left off Dog the Bounty Hunter.
Leslie H said on 04.09.10 at 08:45 PM • [link]
“Business in the front party in the back” the mullet motto.
IMHO the Canadian side had too many Shags pretending to Mullet.
Joanna S. said on 04.09.10 at 09:30 PM • [link]
Greetings to all!
Now, I realize that Canada has some truly gag-reflex inducing examples of the Mullet; however, being from the South (and being forced to watch a lot of NASCAR and NASCAR fans), I can tell you that nothing says “Southern” like a Femme Mullet topped off with a cammo inspired tube-top and jean short hot pants! Of course, this individual is usually accompanied by a male-mullet wearing ripped jeans, a John Deere trucker hat, and a Confederate flag shirt - Oh, and a baby wearing only a diaper drinking Coke out of a bottle. Aaaahh, good times. Good times.
Also (and here is the kicker for me), Canada may have fierce competition with regard to the mullet, but in America, we have a movie dedicated to this unfortunate hairstyle. It’s a documentary, entitled American Mullet and here is my proof:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0284329/**Please forgive my poor internet skills if the link doesn’t work**
I rest my case, and cast my vote for SB Sarah!!
Tina S said on 04.09.10 at 09:38 PM • [link]
I had to go with USA because I adore MacGyver. That’s all. Simple, really.
Amanda from Baltimore said on 04.09.10 at 10:16 PM • [link]
If you go to Awkward Family Photos (the .com one) and search for “mullet” it is pure comic gold.
Check this out: it’s a mullet for the ages.
http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/2009/08/22/saturday-night-special-watchman/
AgTigress said on 04.10.10 at 12:14 AM • [link]
Does anyone know why the hairstyle is named after a fish? I don’t get it.
Ann Rose said on 04.10.10 at 12:14 AM • [link]
I’m voting USA simply on the basis of the fierce mullet-tude that is Randy Johnson. He made the Mariners great (for a while), and come on. Randy. Johnson. WIN.
Suze said on 04.10.10 at 12:36 AM • [link]
Oh, come one. That Russell Crowe do isn’t a mullet, either!
Suze said on 04.10.10 at 12:37 AM • [link]
Come one, come all! I meant “come on”.
Cath Bilson said on 04.10.10 at 12:58 AM • [link]
I agree the Rusty do isn’t a mullet. It’s just long all over. But the whole dead koala quote got me laughing so hard I just had to present it to you.
And believe me, Russell’s had some special mullets in the past.
RebeccaJ said on 04.10.10 at 12:59 AM • [link]
Sarah, yours wins hands down, but I’m surprised you both forgot that hideous mullet David Spade sported in “Joe Dirt”....
http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Joe-Dirt-david-spade-332560_450_300.jpg
Dishonor said on 04.10.10 at 01:18 AM • [link]
I’m a Jersey girl, and we Jerseyans have to have at least some shred of solidarity, right?
Besides, I’d love to see Kristie wearing that wig.
SusannaG said on 04.10.10 at 01:39 AM • [link]
There was a first-class female mullet worn by “Shambo” on Survivor last season.
http://www.cbs.com/primetime/survivor/bio/shannon_19/bio.php
Fiamma said on 04.10.10 at 02:45 AM • [link]
I am Jersey girl and hell yeah, we have rocked the Mullet hard in this state at times.
This is the best contest ever and I am honored to vote! HAHA!
Andrea said on 04.10.10 at 04:45 AM • [link]
Oh, I love this! Although I do keep asking myself why I have a compulsion to look at all these links in the comments - that is truly scary stuff! ;-) I am just soo glad that mullets are not common here anymore!
SonomaLass said on 04.10.10 at 07:22 AM • [link]
Lily, thanks for bringing up John Stamos. He definitely belongs in the Mullet Hall of Shame.
SuperWendy, I’m counting on you to laugh at whoever ends up in the wig. Laugh extra for me!
As someone who for many years was married to a mullet man from Minnesota, I’ve gotta go with Team USA here. But I know Kristie J will be a good sport about it!
Jenyfer Matthews said on 04.10.10 at 09:02 PM • [link]
And correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t Stallone sport one in “Rambo”? I mean, I know he was in the jungle and all, but come on…
Jenyfer Matthews said on 04.10.10 at 09:52 PM • [link]
By the way, my kids were watching Hannah Montana tonight and Miley and Jackson were making fun of Billy Ray’s former mullet-do so naturally I thought of you, Sarah :)
My spam word: growth85 - I think Billy Ray must have had a lot of hair growth since then!
sweetsiouxsie said on 04.11.10 at 04:08 AM • [link]
In the 1980"s on “21 Jump Street” Johnny Depp wore a mullet. It was very sexy! ;)
I wish I knew how to scan in the picture I have of him. It’s really good.
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