Bitchin' Blog Posts
Who reads these things, anyway?
by Candy | by Candy | November 23, 2006 | Thursday at 12:14 am | 110 CommentsLast week, Maili made a most interesting post about assumptions other people make about readers who are attracted to romance novels and romantic stories, and why cynics, in particular, are ill-suited to reading romance novels.
I’m still not sure how romance novels came to have all this baggage attached to them, but all I can say is that some of my least cynical friends—the ones most likely to spout “love conquers all” rubbish—wouldn’t touch romance novels with a 20-foot stick. And you don’t hear people making the same assumptions about cynics and, say, fantasy novels and comics, which are often loaded down with even more romantic (and I use this in the larger sense of the word) claptrap than romance novels are. Being a cynic doesn’t mean being unable to suspend some disbelief for fiction, and furthermore, as Rosario pointed out in the comments, not all romance are cloying and schmaltzy in the way people seem to think they are. Maili’s friend, I’m afraid to say, seems to have indulged in some lazy thinking.
Most of my friends are shocked I read and love romance novels, too. Many of them are disappointed—even mildly disgusted—that I do. It’s not because they think I’m too cynical to be a romance reader, however. They’re usually surprised because I don’t fit the kitten-sweatered, chipper, love-sunshine-and-puppies stereotype they hold in their head of what the average romance novel reader looks like and behaves. I’m young(ish). I don’t own a single item of clothing adorned with puffy paint, paste-on jewels or appliquéd baby animals (though my outfit for Santacon last year was sewn all over with tiny beheaded stuffed animals). And although I’m an idealist, I’m one with an unrepentantly evil sense of humor, and I am, at core, a pessimist and a skeptic.
But it’s not just that I don’t look or behave like the stereotype that throws my friends into a tailspin. The refrain I hear most often from my friends is that I shouldn’t be reading romance novels because I am, of all things, too smart to do so. My friend H is most guilty of doing this. “You have so many other good books to read,” she says, a look of bewilderment on her face. “And you’re one of the smartest people I know. I really don’t know why you like those books.”
Which is sort of flattering to my ego, but kind of not-so-much. I get the sense that these friends feel about that aspect of my life the same way I would if I found out a biologist friend of mine was a young earth creationist. “But…but…it makes no sense. There’s absolutely no scientific support, and you should know better.” With my friends, the fact that I read and love romance novels is not just an aesthetic judgment (“You should have better taste, dammit!”), it’s a judgment of my intellect (“You should be smarter than that, dammit!”).
I’m not sure when enjoying romance novels became equated with being stupid, but I know it’s a stereotype that’s been kicking around for a long time—I certainly subscribed to it until I started reading romances myself. Why? Is it the fact that they’re not viewed as being realistic, and that one would have to be stupid to buy into all that nonsense? (I’ve already bellowed and yelled about this issue in a previous rant, so I won’t re-hash it here.) Is it because a genre this popular could not possibly have any intellectual merit? Or is it something else entirely?
So thus far, we’ve determined that according to the non-romance reading public, cynics, smart people and people with taste shouldn’t be reading romance (and, hey, the Greater Washington Initiative agrees—at least, with the last two points). By that standard, I don’t think I should be a romance reader, because I’m somewhat cynical, somewhat smarter than average (if those tests are to be believed, anyway) and I have fabulous fucking taste (anyone who says otherwise will be soundly ignored for being wrong, wrong, wrong).
These assumptions are a big part of the rason why Sarah and I started the site and why we named it what we did, actually—to attract like-minded romance novel readers, so we’d not only have a haven where we can all gather around and talk about love stories, shriek with horror over man-titty and be unabashedly girly every once in a while, but also so we can send a huge collective middle finger to the public and their assumptions about who does and doesn’t read romance.
So: What kind of a romance reader are you? Let’s turn this into an informal and utterly unscientific survey. Tell us as much as you’re comfortable with, but some interesting bits of information would include gender, age, race, national origin, religion, occupation, education level, sexual orientation (yeah, this is a pretty private question, and like I said, totally optional for you to answer, but I want to see whether it’s overwhelmingly straight chicks who read romance, or whether bisexuals and lesbians have love for the torrid love stories, too) and why you read romance novels. I’ll go first:
I was born
a poor black child
in 1978 in Malaysia to Chinese parents who were devout Buddhists. I was a fantastically mediocre student until I started reading heavily at about age seven, at which point my grades saw huge improvements, including my math scores (I used to be dismal at math). For the longest time I classified myself as an agnostic, but recently, I realized I’m more of a weak atheist; when it comes down it, “skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanist” is a pretty handy descriptor that covers my attitude towards most things. I have a Bachelor of Arts in English from a small, Catholic liberal arts university, and I’m in the process of applying to law school, because my current job (technical writer for a heavy manufacturing facility) isn’t jibing with my save-the-world goals. I’m married to The Tallest Man In the World (OK, not really, but he is 6’8”, which is pretty motherfucking tall), and I’m bisexual with a preference for dudes—I dig androgyny, which is why skinny, pretty men who aren’t afraid to wear skirts have a special place in my heart and my loins. I read romance novels for a whole lot of reasons, but mostly because I’m interested in narratives about love and sex, and because human drama and behavior fascinate me endlessly.
Filed: Random Musings
Ann Aguirre said on 11.23.06 at 12:45 AM • [link]
Oooh, me me me me, pick me!
I was born in 1970 and I was always freakishly clever, at least as regards language. Taught myself to read by age 4, was reading Jane Eyre, Count of Monte Cristo and Don Quixote by age 8. My math skills are terrible, science is a little better. I was never a little kid; I have something people call an old soul.
I’m at least part caucasian, don’t know my biological father for sure. I’m an American expatriate, living in Mexico, religion is largely agnostic because I just don’t believe we can know with any certainty what comes next, if anything. I think all religious writings are curious historical artifacts, but as evidence of divinity are pure bullshit. I think war about religion is even bigger bullshit. It’s like two little kis arguing over whose dad can beat whose up when said dads are never going to get their asses out of the hammock.
My first love was my first-cousin, which is probably why I have a non-squick factor for that. My family is largely from Kentucky and yes, I understand how many jokes people could make from that, but if Daniel had lived, I’d be married to him. He died when I was 19.
I have a bachelor’s degree in English Lit, minor in Humanities. Graduated with Honors and from Honors college, just three credits shy of my teaching license. I couldn’t afford to not work for my student teaching so I cut line and graduated. I promptly did nothing with that degree and ran through a sequence of jobs that paid the bills, nothing more. I’m married to a rich guy (quite by accident). He stands to run five companies here in Mexico someday. That’s his path, but it’s not mine, and I’ve been wanting to come back to the states almost since the shine wore off. For about three months it was new and exotic. Now it’s just foreign and lonely. I want to move to California and pursue teaching credentials.
I’m bi, but only in the sense that I’m attracted to the person, not the apparatus. I’ve only been attracted to a woman once in my life, but Alexis was an amazing person. I have a weakness for big, hairy guys who look mean, but are cuddly teddy bears inside. I’ve met the perfect man for me, but I doubt I’ll ever be with him, although the jury’s still out on that.
And I read / write romances because I don’t believe in happily-ever-afters in real life, so it’s a candle against the dark.
Kalen Hughes said on 11.23.06 at 12:56 AM • [link]
I was born to crazy Native Americans living on a commune in Bolder Creek CA in 1970. I’ve always been top of my class and a total grade hound. I have a genius level IQ (which isn’t as high as my little brother’s, much to my annoyance). I have a “terminal†degree (meaning that I’m qualified to teach at the college level and that there is no where else to go; aka a PhD or an MFA). I’m an International Trade Consultant (meaning that I get to say to lawyers, “You neither impress nor intimate me.†a lot). I’m also a Romance Novelist (first book due out next spring). I’m straight, but I have a healthy appreciation for the other side’s POV. Girls are just so pretty. You can put me down as another “skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanistâ€. Hello, I wrote my thesis on skepticism and existentialism.
And as an aside to Maili, I’m DEEPLY cynical, and that’s WHY I read and write romance.
kardis said on 11.23.06 at 01:08 AM • [link]
I was born in a University town in Central Illinois in 1982 to parents with crazy PhDs in the humanities. I have a B.S. in biology emphasis on molecular genetics and evolution of pathogens (yes Candy, knowing you were reading Parasite Rex made me extremely happy!) I am now at a small school in Chicago working on a massage certification and will eventually get a Master’s in Oriental Medicine. I identify as straight, but I too am “fag-lovin’” and agnostic. I definitely consider myself a cynic when it comes to love, which I think helps me enjoy the romance novel! I’m passionate about politics and consider myself a humanist. I think that answered all the questions… (did I mention that I have the memory of a goldfish when it comes to everyday stuff? My memory banks are currently full of TCM meridians.)
Kaite said on 11.23.06 at 01:17 AM • [link]
Let’s see.
I’m a 33 year old single female, a little over-dependent on her fur kids for emotional fulfillment, with a master’s degree in library science which I, as a customer service writer, don’t use (largely by choice.) I’m Catholic, mostly because it’s the most pagan of the Christian sects and I like to sing in my choir. I’d be just as comfortable in a grove praying to the Moon. I guess I took my religion teachers literally, but in the wrong way: One God=all Gods are the One God. As long as you’re not worshipping Entropy, it’s six or half-dozen to me.
I test high on intelligence scores and my friends would say I’m a pretty cold person, emotionally. But I know that a lot of my cynicism is hiding the soft, tender bits that NO ONE is allowed to poke and prod to the point of pain any more, ever, so I tend to use romance as a sort of wish fulfillment. I still hope, though, which I think keeps me sane, and the romance novels help.
I grew up in a family of voracious and curious readers and there were no forbidden books. I didn’t start reading romance until I was in my late 20’s though, because the classics were just making my depression worse (particularly the damn Victorians.) I would have to say my ‘sexual orientation’ is something I take on a case by case basis, although I really don’t easily thrill. Based on past experiences, though, I’d have to say I’m heavily biased to the men (only some androgynous guys really get me going) but there are some women out there who make me go all giggly. Alas for them! ;-)
I think cynics are natural romance writers! They’re also natural fantasy/sci-fi readers—they want a world that will live up to their expectations (after all, they wouldn’t be cynical if they hadn’t been hurt by the world, now, would they?) and you can’t find that in fiction set in the real world.
tsquared said on 11.23.06 at 01:25 AM • [link]
I seem a bit older than the posters so far so I’ll leave that question alone. I consider myself black though my mother was white. I am from Minnesota with a bachelor’s degree in history from a small liberal arts college. I work as a mid-level peon in the finance industry but law school didn’t work out and there’s not much more out there for a history degree with an emphasis on England since the Industrial Revolution.
I used to hide all my romance novels under my dirty clothes in the closet but I am getting better at not letting people define me by what I read (comes with age, I think).
I am either an atheistic cynic or a cynical atheist but one who still checks Catholic on surveys.
eggs said on 11.23.06 at 01:32 AM • [link]
Born in 1969, I live in Australia, I’m married to the kind of physicist that gets published in Nature and I have a masters in political economy from one of the leading Aussie universities. I’ve travelled a lot and lived in the US for most of my late twenties & early 30’s. Luckily for me, we are well off enough that I don’t have to work, so I’ll be staying home with the tin lids until they’re both off to school.
Frankly, if people want to think I’m stupid for reading romances they can go right ahead - and plenty of them do. OTOH, I feel equally free to mock those people for obsessing over fermented grape juice, chasing little white balls around with sticks, or owning Buffy DVDs. I don’t need to rely on third-party assessments of my IQ to be comfortable with who I am and most of my friends feel the same way. I do get the ‘why?!?!’ question a lot, but my basic response is that I enjoy reading romance, and why shouldn’t I spend my spare time doing something I enjoy? After all, everyone else does. This seems to satisfy most people.
When people take us to task for any of our lifestyle choices, be it the home we live in, the food/wine we consume, the tv we watch, or the books we read, I think they are telling us more about themselves than anything. They are telling us that THEY are afraid of being judged by others, and they really wish we’d be concerned about it too. Because if we don’t care about it, they they have the extra worry of being judged for being shallow or judgmental. It’s a form of paranoia. I wish I could help them with that, but I can’t, so I just sit back and keep reading the books I enjoy.
eggs.
rebyj said on 11.23.06 at 01:36 AM • [link]
stupid? HA!!
I laugh at that assumption.
I win all the time at trivial pursuit because due to my romance novel reading I can answer any Indian, Highlander, Vampire, Architect, Museum, sci fi, old movie plot question on the board!!!
I get asked all the time “How did YOU know that?” by my nerdly,college educated friends… “I read it in a romance novel thats how!”
Darlene Marshall said on 11.23.06 at 01:40 AM • [link]
I’m a 51 year old (and darn glad of it—the alternative sucks) white woman who’s lived in Florida most of her life. My mom dropped dead when I was eight, which left me pre-disasterized, and my father married a certifiable loony who managed not to destroy the family despite her best efforts. And I’m one cynical bitch. I used to be a reporter, news director, editor, owned a radio station and worked at a drug treatment center. All of that will whap the puppy cuddling softness out of you real fast.
Nonetheless, I like a well written romance. I’ve been married for over 30 years to the same man, and I like stories with a happy ending, partly because real live so often is about suicide bombers and dead mommies and babies in dumpsters and kids with cancer. A little escapism helps keep you sane.
Mel-O-Drama said on 11.23.06 at 01:42 AM • [link]
I was adopted in 1969 to a Church of Christ momma and a bible-quoting-non-church-going daddy. I lived in a community that was pretty much created as a white-flight community. When I was old enough to pay my own bills, I immediately moved to the big city of Little Rock, AR and reveled in the world of color and culture. My mom votes republican because of the taxes and daddy doesn’t vote, but again, he’s good with an opinion. He expected me to go to college to find a husband who could take care of me since he never really thought I would be capable of taking care of myself—being a girl and all. (Plus, he was resentful that my mom was the bread winner in our family—she being a girl and all.)
Instead of finding a husband, I found a BA in English. I have actually been married now for 14 years, but we’re a dual income family. (sorry pops) I work in accounting for a Financial Software company.
“Skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanist†pretty much sums me up to a T…throw in the phrase “lapsed Catholic” and that sums up my husband. And we’re proudly raising lapsed catholic children.
I started reading Romance when I was 13 because I felt that the “age appropriate” books at that time were still too young for me. It wasn’t so much the sex as it was the sentence structure. I had been reading since I was 2 years old. YA books read like See Spot Run to me.
I read and write romance now because I can lose myself in them. Happily Ever After is a guarantee and dammit, I really, really, really like a good escape.
rebyj said on 11.23.06 at 01:42 AM • [link]
hahaha
when defending one’s intelligence , one should proofread before hitting submit..
“because due” ? LOL
sleepy vampire said on 11.23.06 at 02:04 AM • [link]
My first post - this IS exciting isn’t it? Nah, not really, but still…
I think I’m the youngest one here at 23, I’m still a lowly uni student, political science and english lit. I’m Australian, currently studying in England (and freezing to death). I voraciously devour romance novels because they’re easy to rip through and don’t require me to study the postmodernist psycho-analytical interpretations of the use of figurative language in the sexual position of the queer male lead… or whatever my professor decides to torture me with. *grin*
Seriously though, people are always shocked when they come into my room and see romance novels - I’ve been told I have a reputation as being “a sarcastic, cynical, cold-hearted puppy-kicker” which is true, except I love puppies. I’m bi, but have a preference for males, especially the alpha-male type much to my continuing annoyance. I’ve been through a lot of religions starting when I was about 7 years old - the unfortunate result of having a protestant mom and a catholic dad. I’ve since given up on trying to fit in to any single category and so my religion is “my kind”.
Romance in real life is for chumps (in my opinion - sorry for offending any die-hard romantics!) but romance in books conveniently ignores all those obstacles to love - like money for food and scary in-laws and oral hygiene. Romance novels are fun, that’s why I read them. Escapist literature is a necessary element of surviving in a world gone totally mad.
PS Love the site! You guys crack me up.
Jacqueline Barbour said on 11.23.06 at 02:35 AM • [link]
Oh, I love this game. Must play!
I was born in Southern California in 1964 (but I was conceived in Watkins Glen, NY, thereby making me “bi”, in the coastal sense at any rate, before birth). My mother was college eddicated, went to grad school at Berkeley in Social Science, and wound up as a tax accounting specialist. My father never went to college, was a Border Patrol agent and detective until he retired at age 50. He was also an amateur race car driver and archaeologist/anthropologist, and easily one of the smartest, most educated people I have ever known. I still miss him, damn it!
But, back to me (because of course, it’s all about me). In kindergarten, I was given an IQ test and scored 164. My mother promptly wondered how in the world she was ever going to raise such a genius. As an adult, my IQ tests around 138 generally. Not sure whether that means my parents ruined me or whether the tests on five year olds aren’t all that accurate; I suspect the latter, seeing that my parents walk(ed) on water). Nearly seventeen years later, I’m still contentedly married to the same man (notice I don’t say “happily”, which would imply that constant happiness is some sort of standard for a successful relationship), and have three kids ranging in age from 9 to 4. Religiously, we are Unitarian Universalists, which means we are basically secular humanists who go to church every Sunday. I believe in God depending on what your definition of God is (which is probably not the same as mine, so you’d probably just call me an atheist).
I have a Masters Degree in Classics from the University of Chicago and was working on my PhD when life intervened and I got married instead. (You understand now why I like romance novels, perhaps?) I make my living as an instructional designer but hope to someday join Kalen and Ana in the ranks of actually published writers. (Hey, a girl can dream, can’t she? Shit, wait a minute, I’m fucking 42! I’m not a girl any more! Hang on while I go weep quietly for a few minutes.)
Okay, I’m back, having successfully mourned my lost girl-ness. I started reading romance novels when I was in my teens. (My, what a lot of claptrap those books were! I’m sure most of them would horrify me if I were to read them now.) Books my mother referred to as “bodice rippers” and “soft-core porn”. (And what’s wrong with that, I ask?) I lost my taste for romance novels in my mid-twenties and thirties, but regained it recently (right around the time I weaned my youngest; you decide whether there’s any connection there or not) and then got my taste for WRITING back as well.
Why do I like romance novels? Partly, it’s because part of me wants to believe in happily ever after, even though the reality is that love and marriage is mostly a lot of hard work. And partly, it’s because I love sex, but *especially* sex with love.
Undercover said on 11.23.06 at 03:11 AM • [link]
I post my opinions here under another nick but if I’m going to be personal I have to hide a little deeper for professional reasons.
I’m about 52—still can’t believe it—how did that happen? B.A. in English. J.D. some years later. Agnostic/atheist/Pagan, anything but the stultifying Protestant religion of my mother. For the past 7 years I have been deliberately celibate—most productive years of my life. You would not believe how much energy and time I used to waste on sex. I liked younger men and older women. Still enjoy looking. Hey, I’m celibate, not dead.
I read all of the traditional stuff that is considered romances such as the Brontes, Austen, Heyer. Then came the Sweet Savage stuff that squicked me out pretty fast—I remember the book that did it—a pirate story by Fern Michaels where the heroine was raped by everyone, on the pirate ship, probably even the cabinboy. (I would probably think that over the top funny now.)
Started back reading romance in 89 quit again because there were so few authors in Romanceland that I enjoyed reading. Started picking up romances again about 2000 but hard to find the ones I like so I don’t read many romances, at least not all the way through. I like non-traditional couples (or triples for that matter) and a good story makes me indifferent to the sex of the people involved. I like strong women. I hate, hate, hate TSTL, daddy worshiping, brother supporting, my hymen is gold heroines.
Becky said on 11.23.06 at 03:24 AM • [link]
The basics:
Female, white, 32, born in Pennsylvania and lived all over the midwest, currently a resident of Texas, Office Manager, non-practicing Pagan (which means that’s the way my beliefs swing, but I haven’t actively participated in a group or cast a circle on my own for a couple of years), half a degree in creative writing, learned more from RWA than I ever did from my professors, sexual orientation is constantly evolving, read my first romance at 17- “The Gift” by Julie Garwood, the least girly girl you will ever meet
I think I first started reading romance because I never thought it would happen to me. Looking back, guys were interested, but I was so clueless I didn’t pick up on the signs. As I got older I had a few non-starter relationships. Those disappointments, combined with watching friends go through horrible, abusive relationships (because it’s better to be smacked now and then or humiliated in public than to not have a date on a Saturday night) made me decide that I’d rather be alone than deal with that mess. Romance novels became my outlet for all the soft, squishy feelings that I chose to block off from the rest of the world. I don’t read them as much as I used to, but I still pick one up every now and then. And of course I have a shelf or two of favorites that are read over and over.
I also have a fur baby that my life revolves a little too much around. I joke that he’s almost like having a husband or boyfriend- he steals the covers, he farts in bed, he expects me to feed and clean up after him, he gets irate if I stay out too late or am gone too long, and he can’t stand it when I talk on the phone. Of course, there’s one big husband/boyfriend role he can’t fill, but that’s why I have B.O.B.
rascoagogo said on 11.23.06 at 03:56 AM • [link]
Fun!
Born in 1982 to creative parents in Austin, TX, I started talking at 7 months and could read by 2 1/2. My mom is an artist, my dad is in marketing (as am I). I have a genius-level IQ, breezed through private schools and then the University of Tx.
I’ve always read voraciously. My family is intellectual but conservative and Christian. Romance novels and pretty much anything concerning sex was verboten. I started smuggling romance novels home from the library in a big satchel when I was 12 or 13. The appeal was obvious, but it turns out that I like them a lot as a break from Real Literature from my Eng. degree.
Like a lot of people, a lot of the appeal is in the books as an outlet for the feelings I keep closed off from people. In a generation that’s all about ironic detachment, it’s not cool to be a hopeless romantic. I’m a secret hopeless romantic for now. I’ll be out of the closet when I get married. Romance offers the dream of finding someone smart, hot, powerful and sexy. Being smart and sarcastic and tall-ish, a male who leans toward the alpha is pretty appealing…
I’m straight (but get the appeal of the other side), white, and my own breed of intellectual, gay-friendly Christian who doesn’t attend.
Darlene Marshall said on 11.23.06 at 04:06 AM • [link]
I wish we could go back and edit our posts. I was in a hurry and forgot to answer a couple of Candy’s questions:
I have a B.S. in broadcasting, minored in History and Political Science and read everything from philosophy to Details magazine. I’ve been an active science fiction fan for over 25 years, attending Worldcon most years. I’m a published romance writer with three historicals on sale. I’m Jewish and fairly religious—I keep kosher, am Sabbath observant, etc. I like to mentally undress the cantor during the Rosh Hashanna service, but it’s OK ‘cause the cantor’s my husband.
Nat said on 11.23.06 at 04:27 AM • [link]
I just hit 35 this month and was raised in relative affluence on Long Island. Both my parents are “off the boaters(though in my mother’s case; literally. She was too pregnant to fly, so she and my brother took the QE2 from England to here). Dad went to technical college and only read the newspaper (but he read every single article). Mum has her BA from the University of London and is ecstatic that one of her two children loves to read.
I have a MA in English, but having no desire to teach or be in publishing, I also have a MLS, where I now am a Youth Services Librarian. I get to hang with the school age kids and the teens - who are a blast by the way.
I’m definitely not a cynic and was always reading. As for romances, well I was a shirt, boobless, girl with braces in High School, and thus had not a date in sight. I had already been reading the teen romances at that time, but began graduating up through high school. Reading was always my escape - and my savior. Unbeknownst to me for 12 years, I was a sympotmatic depressive with no meds and no therapy. Reading kept my brain from exploding.
Now, I am well medicated, happily in therapy, and married to a wonderful man 6 years this Saturday. Do I still read romances? Hell yes. They are wonderful stories and I can’t imagine anyone not enjoying them. I mean, what’s so bad about happily ever after? Plus, as an added bonus, they are a good in-btween course when reading YA fiction. Those books are depressing!!
Jackie said on 11.23.06 at 04:32 AM • [link]
Ok, also old fart—52. I was reading Georgette Heyer when she was STILL ALIVE. Guess that makes me old. There’s muddy duddy after my name—fuddy duddy being a Ph.D. A select few of my patients know I read romance—although one, a guy who teaches special ed threatened to quit me when I mentioned that I too read Linda Howard. He was reading LH at the time himself. Folks in glass houses….
Oh, as an aside—Candy you need to read Linda Howard’s Cry No More before you diss her again. If you hate it, you can diss her all you want. Sarah, you can’t read it until your youngest kid is at least 6 or 7.
If you want to develop healthy cynicism, try working a county ER for 8 years. Yes, ladies, I have heard it all. I am straight, but non-judgmental unless you keep hitting on me, because I am YOUR DAMN DOCTOR and it’s not allowed whoever you are. Married for 28 years to a veterinarian who is miraculously still alive. Lapsed Baptist (thank God)—way too many things were forbidden. And I love romance and a lot of sci fi because I can go to work to watch people suffer and die. Plus I have three teenagers still at home and I need all the escapism I can find.
Taekduu said on 11.23.06 at 04:54 AM • [link]
I was born in Nigeria in 1981 and came to the US when my mother remarried, I consider myself african because to say african-american or black connotates a 400+ year history I simply do not have in the US. I have a BS (natural sciences) and an MD that I earned in 6 years. Currently a medicine resident. I have bopped myself from New York to the southwest. My parents are confused and depending on what day it is are strict practicing Muslims or Protestant or belive in animal magic. Like I said, it depends. This has given me a thoroughly cynical view of the practice of religion and I am sticking to faith.
I started reading romances because I am a voracious reader (can read 400+ pages in less than 2 hours and frequently require more books) and around the age of 9 my dad’s college books had been used up and wrung dry and I was bored and they were there in all heir sordid glory. I think he first one was some western. I endured many years (ongoing) of denigration of abuse for my love of reading. My parents lumped romance in with fantasy, mystery, horror, and general fiction. As far as my father was concerned if it wasn’t a classic (Dickens, shakespeare, aristotle, etc) then it was some kind of romance and that was for fat women and the birds!
I came out of the romance closet about 6 years ago and discovered fun people who also liked the books. I have now addicted a couple more residents (what can I say, I deal in book crack). I am a hardcore cynic as described by my friends and can be an evil plotter. I love romances for taking me somewhere else, they are fun, and right up there with my other loves (fantasay and sci-fi) for taking me away from the here and now. A clear cut reason why I like them is not currently available to me, but when I find out, I will let you know. I do get tired of romance when I OD, but I always come back.
As for sexual orientation, I am straight, happily single but willing to play whenever someone falls in my lap. I do admit to being a hopeless romantic (deep deep down, only admitted to myself on rare occasions).
Candy thanks for the opportunity to share!
Mistress Stef said on 11.23.06 at 06:33 AM • [link]
Let’s see…I’m female, age 33, Caucasian (German/Ukrainian). I have a day job at an airline and also am a partner in an ebook company. Married, straight, but not narrow.
I have an Associates in Computer Information Systems, graduated with a cumulative 4.0. I have been editing professionally since I was fifteen, when I used to proofread term papers at five bucks a pop.
I was hideously unpopular in school, and I didn’t give a rat’s ass about grades. I actually spent five years trying to be a rock star, then faced reality and eventually went to college.
As a publisher, I actually think being cynical is a benefit. I first became involved in erotica/ romance because of what was covered in a recent discussion here: why so much romance is crap. Poor plots, TSTL characters, etc. So I thought I could be a part of the solution rather than part of the problem.
I think my cynicism gives me the ability to see when something is going down that tired old road, and what to do to fix it. The drawback is, I have to find a very well-crafted romance to read for fun because I can’t silence the editor in my head, and that bitch starts screaming at every issue she spots.
Sam said on 11.23.06 at 07:41 AM • [link]
Ok, I am a 31 year old woman living in Tennessee. I have been divorced for about 8 years with my last date being over 2 years ago. Right now I’m just not interested in dating especially after the last few I endured. I’m in a small town where everyone seems to marry right out of high school so when you get older all the men are either married and unavailable or divorced and bitter and take it out on you. I no longer dream about my next beautiful wedding and have just about decided to go ahead and embrace spinsterhood (I guess I can be one-I wasn’t married very long) to be done with it. My point is that you would think I would be the last person to touch romance novels, but I love the hell out of them. Like a previous poster said they are fun and I just want to good story. Actually if I did have a guy who surprised me with a candelight dinner and roses and all that I’d think “Oh my God, what on earth is this?”. I have a BA in English and spend years reading classics and now I want stuff that doesn’t require cliff notes for every other sentence. I ended up working in a public library as a cataloger and it turns out my love of romance novels has led to more responsibilty at work. My boss noticed what kind of books I read and decided to place me in charge of donated books stating that I seem to have a better grasp on current pop culture. The other woman who did it hates romance novels and would stick brand spanking new books in the book sale instead of letting me have them to place in circulation.
What else? I consider myself a Christian although I haven’t been to church in years. I have always been a bookworm devouring fairy tales and golden books when I was able to read without help. Then when I was ready for chapter books I read a lot of Beverly Cleary and Judy Blume as I got older. There are actually a lot of Children’s books I missed so part of my reading as an adult is going back to fill in the gaps. For example, I didn’t pick up a Nancy Drew book until I was well over 25. As a teenager I read a few series books for teens like Sisters and Sweet Valley High. Then the Flowers in the Attic movie came out and started up a V.C. Andrews phase that lasted for years. That led to more horror fiction that included the works of Edgar Allan Poe and Anne Rice. Then right before I turned 20 I picked up a few romance novels from the library by Lisa Kleypas, Sandra Brown and Amanda Quick just to see what about them made them so appealing to so many people. I’m so glad I did. I firmly believe most people who put them down have either never read one or just had the misfortune of picking up the wrong one to start with.There have been a few romance novels I didn’t like, but that didn’t scare me away from the entire genre.
Tania said on 11.23.06 at 07:43 AM • [link]
I think I’m now the youngest to post here. I’m 21, currently working full-time in fast foods and attempting to get my fuckin’ life together (AKA get back to university; I got depressed in my second term and dropped out). Mostly Caucasian, with a bit of indigenous peoples thrown in for fun. No religion, though I believe in things like karma.
Born and raised in Canada. I’m straight, but not for lack of trying. Women just don’t do it for me, the bitches. Damned if I could tell you what my IQ is, I’ve tested for anything between 142 - 164. So I guess it’s high.
I’m a virgin, never-been-kissed, even, probably due to my diagnosed social anxiety disorder. I read books because making friends was too hard. You can only play with your one friend for so long before the two of you need time off.
I think I read romance novels because I don’t believe anything even remotely similar will ever happen to me. Not the dating thing, that’ll happen eventually, because knowing I couldn’t help the shyness has helped me overcome it (odd, that), but the whole being-swept-off-my-feet-and-onto-my-back-forever-after part.
Tania said on 11.23.06 at 08:18 AM • [link]
I’d just like to say I didn’t mean on-my-back-forever-after as in dead, but as in appear-happily-together-in-later-novels-with-2.5 kids-and-dog kind of forever-after.
Heh, this survey’s going to be way biased, because the women who do fit the romance-reader stereotypes won’t frequent this site, they’ll be over at the LKH forums saying “dont listen 2 wut every1 else says! i luv u n u still write good!!!!!111”
Madd said on 11.23.06 at 08:20 AM • [link]
I was born in Chicago,1976, to Mexican immigrant parents. I was the first child in my family born in the US. They were divorced by the time I was 3. My mother moved in with my grandparents, who pretty much raised me and my sister while my mother worked. I grew up in a Puerto Rican ghetto. I went to Catholic school, but am now Pagan. I have an above average IQ and was a straight A student. I’m bi, but am in a monogamous hetero marriage and we have 2 sons.
cassie said on 11.23.06 at 08:28 AM • [link]
I’m also a 21 year old female Canuck, though I spent some of my younger years in the Philippines. Currently in university, and apparently I’m supposed to pick a major very soon. I’m fairly certain I’m straight, am not sure what my religion is and have no idea what I want to do with my life, though something with horses (not a vet!), or better yet, that would allow me to have horses, would be nice. I would say I tend to be on the pessimistic side - expecting the worst in any situation, but only so I can be pleasantly surprised when something better happens ;-) .
All in all, with the exception of my parents’ marriage (and my grandparents’ and some of my relatives’ - am I sensing a pattern?), my life’s been pretty uneventful. Not much residual high school trauma - not that I was in it much (took a lot of time off for riding, but still maintained good grades, which was the deal I had with my parents so I could ride). I wasn’t hugely popular, but not an outcast either; I think my friends and I were kind of in that middle space where not much happened in terms of drama or angst or boys.
I think I read romance novels because I’d like to hope that relationships will have a HEA, even with all the proof that it does not always work out (although, two of my friends have been going out since grade 10 and are still together, which I think is quite remarkable). I got into romance books fairly young - 12 or 13 - and didn’t realize there was a stigma attached to them until much later. I went off them for a while (I think around 16 or 17), having burned through many that were not all that great, and slowly found my way back. I’m more careful now about which ones I read and buy.
Sally said on 11.23.06 at 08:48 AM • [link]
What kind of romance reader am I? For years, I was guilty of the same book prejudices that this site frequently blasts. I wouldn’t be caught dead among the pink covers of the romance section in the bookstore. This was despite the fact that I’m a total bookworm and have always, always had a weak spot for novels with a satisfying romantic subplot. I’m not sure where my uninformed aversion to romance novels came from, although I suspect my mother’s vocal disdain for them had a lot to do with it (incidentally, my mother currently has a lot of Nora Roberts books lying around the house for someone with no use for romance). Anyhow, about a year ago I was writing up my PhD thesis in chemistry and feeling stressed from the combination of trying to finish up my degree and find a job at the same time. I needed something to take my mind off work, badly. Something possessed me to try downloading erotica from an e-publisher. And then I did it again, and again, and again. I’m slowly moving into more mainstream romance and non-epubs (though I’m ashamed to admit that the romance section in bookstores still intimidates me a bit).
As for the other stuff, I’m 29 years old and currently working as a post-doctoral researcher in chemistry (yes, I did get a job, despite the distraction of the e-pubs…). I was not raised in a religion and I think I qualify as an agnostic at the moment. I’m straight, although looking at sexuality as falling along a continuum always made more sense to me (and I don’t think I’m all the way to one side of that continuum). I’m from the US, with some blend of European and eastern European ancestry. I don’t think of myself as particularly cynical, but maybe I’m a little snarky because I get a real kick out of this site.
Katie said on 11.23.06 at 09:03 AM • [link]
I claim youngest, as I’m 20. Currently an evolution and ecology major in college and planning on going to grad school to do research. I’ve been reading voraciously since I was young, and romance novels from my early teens. Luckily, my grandmothers, who loaned romance novels to my mom, had excellent taste, so part of the reason I liked romance initially was because it was better writing than the ‘age-appropriate’ stuff we read in school. Plus, it felt so subversive to be in the general fiction section (there was sex! in books!) as a young teen. I like romance partially for the escapism but also for the characters—I love seeing relationships that work (my parents are in the process of getting divorced, after many, many years of unhappiness). Also, I am a hopeless romantic, but I keep up appearances as a cynic. I identify myself as Methodist, but my beliefs are not as tidy as that. My mother was Presbyterian-turned Methodist and my father is a never-misses-mass Catholic, so while a strong belief in God was emphasized, beliefs in a specific denomination were not. Although I hid my romances for a long time, I now proudly own up to reading them, which confounds my friends to no end. I’m slowly trying to lure them in with well written, non-snarkable-cover romances. I’m single, straight, female, and quite intelligent (if test scores are to be believed).
geniusofevil said on 11.23.06 at 09:35 AM • [link]
you forgot to mention how you survived the tsunami!
and, yea atheism!
Sami said on 11.23.06 at 10:04 AM • [link]
Age: 18
Nationality: American (Arizona desert rat to be specific)
Gender: Female
Intelligence: I’d love to say smart, but I t
Orientation: Lesbian (I love love love stories about two people falling in love… I just wish I could find more better quality stories about two ladies falling in love.)
Race: White
Religion: agnostic with a side of lazy
Occupation: Ticket seller at a theater
Education: College Freshmen with my major as Creative Writing
Honestly, I think the romance reading is the least that people could pick on me for. I mean I own Buffy DVDs ( ;) ), I’m a random trivia whore, I geek out on everything from Star Wars to Dinosaurs, and I rock my nerd glasses. Besides, most of my friends think that its cute. They are horrible cynics so compared to them I am a ray of sunshine. I used to be cynic and then I went to college and realized that there was a void to fill. What can I say? I like being devil’s advocate. I love genre books so it was only a matter of time before I moseied over to romance.
I read my first true Romance last year. It was a Christine Feehan. I thought it was silly but enjoyable. I started reading a few more and liked them more but I still have a soft spot for Feehan. I really got into romances just by reading the blogs and the reviews. I’ve been trying to find good romances. I love strong, badass females so it difficult to find them among the virgin widows. Also, they are great just as a writing resource. My major is creative writing and one thing that I wasn’t getting better at was writing relationships so it great to read books to study how published authors build up chemistry. I like them the most for giving me a story I can just plain enjoy and escape from the real world with. My favorites are paranormals.
Audrey said on 11.23.06 at 10:21 AM • [link]
Ok, I’ve got to delurk for this one, I’ve been coming here for a long time, but usually someone says what I want to say much better than I could!
I’m a 48 year old Canadian born of German immigrant business people. I had an uneventful childhood with my two sisters, got married at sixteen, stayed that way and had three children. I’m a bookkeeper but didn’t go to college, but now am not working and not looking. So that’s what I am, but who I am is an atheist, a skeptic, a liberal, a woman who loves to bake and renovate homes and spend a lot of time with my husband and children.
Why do I read romance? I’ve thought about this while reading threads on that subject and the answer is…sorry, don’t have a clue. I was an avid reader as a kid, blew my way through everything from Nancy Drew to C.S. Lewis to Homer and my favorite book in junior high was an anthology by Isaac Asimov. Then I quit reading for a few years while my children were small (I hate being interrupted while I read) until a friend recommended The Wolf and The Dove by Kathleen Woodiwiss. That was it, I was hooked. Now I read about 150 a year. I think I just love to read about interpersonal relationships and I just never get the same thrill from the other kinds of books I occasionally read.
sithgirl said on 11.23.06 at 11:15 AM • [link]
I was born in 1989, making me the new “youngest.” I have always felt slightly out of place being a Canadian born, third-generation Chinese female who laughs loudly and is one of the farthest things from demure. I currently reside in North Carolina, which still considers itself a part of the American South.
I am merely a senior in high school, but I did the whole IQ testing thing (173). I don’t think it means anything considering there is no practical application for the ridiculous number. I take 5 AP classes, but push on doors that are clearly labelled “pull.”
I lack a clear religious label, having problems with organized religion yet not being an atheist or an agnostic since I believe in my own odd collection of gods, goddesses, natural spirits, and ancestors. I don’t belong to a church or temple.
I have no job, but I spend a significant portion of my time at the local library, either volunteering, tutoring, or otherwise patronizing. My first introduction to the idea of a romance novel was Pride and Prejudice in 6th grade. My first real romance novel was Susan Wiggs Halfway to Heaven. I’m straight, and I’ve got a serious preference for alpha male and reformed rake (I attribute this nonsense to my youth). The heroine has to be intelligent and somewhat practical, otherwise I want to drag her out of the work and shake her to death.
I read romance to get away from real life. I am a cynic that gets abused by the world in many ways my soft and squishy heart doesn’t like to bear. There are only so many philosophy and history tomes one can go through before you want something you know will end happily. And really, romance is the only genre with dialogue as witty and snappy as I like.
Elizabeth said on 11.23.06 at 12:56 PM • [link]
Age: 16 (beat that, bitches!)
Nationality: European-American (currently live near Seattle, WA)
Sexuality: Straight. I actually think that women are better looking then men, but I’m just not sexually attracted to them. I do tend to prefer “pretty boy” style guys, though.
Education: I’m currently at an arts school. My eventual plan is to get a PhD in either English or History.
Favorite romance novel: Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen
Last romance novel read: The Deception of the Emerald Ring, by Lauren Willig
Profession: None… er… student? At any rate, I would, one day, like to be a novelist and actor.
I was always far cleverer than the other children my age. It wasn’t that I didn’t play well with them… it was just that I didn’t want to play with them, in the first place. Books were, IMHO, better than living, breathing people. And the characters in said books—! Oh, they were so intelligent, so cultured, so witty! You can read about (or write about) any sort of character at all.
I read everything that I could get my hands on, as a kid. Cover to cover. At age eight, I could be found sobbing over Nancy’s demise in Oliver Twist one minute, then trying to wade through an artical on sexual gratification in my mother’s Cosmo (wait—that means WHAT!?). The first romance novels that I read were some of the older ones—does anyone here recall Elswyth Thane? At any rate, I fell in love. I am cynical in real life, but secretly love happy endings, in fiction. Romance novels open a door to a world where such things as happy endings actually do exist, and I am forever grateful to them for giving me a world to believe in where it really is possibly to ride off into the sunset without being burnt to a crisp. I have always claimed that I was born in the wrong century, but reading a Regancy allows me to be in my favorite era (Georgian England) without lack of internet or chilled beverages.
To recap, I read romance novels (novels of any sort, really) to escape from reality. I prefer historical settings, though I have been known to read fantasy and even contemporaries—but these people’s lives, even those supposedly taking place in the 21st century, are always more interesting (and, dare I point it out, romantic?) than those that can be found outside of a book.
Lorelie said on 11.23.06 at 01:01 PM • [link]
I’m 26 but I will be 27 in seven days. (Holy crap, where are my 20’s going?) I was about three fourths of the way through a BA in History when I thought “OMG, I don’t wanna teach, what am I going to do with this?” I’m married with two kids but I’ve had a couple walks on the bi-side before I settled down. My IQ usually tests in the 140s and I’m currently working as a Managerial Assistant (secretary).
When I was in the Army, my dog tags used to read “Non-Denominational Christian” but my beliefs are a little more complicted than that. To believe in an all powerful God, one must also believe that’s he’s larger and more than your mind can ever truly comprehend. To me, that eliminates any possibility of one religion being right over the others. How do we know each religion isn’t merely a different aspect of God, shown in the way necessary for certain people to come to him/her?
I think I’m pretty much an optimist who’s consistently getting smacked in the face by the fact that people aren’t as intrinsically good as I want them to be. Including myself. For me, Romance is an escape from failure - my own and the failures of the world.
Yep, I agree with her.
Lorelie said on 11.23.06 at 01:03 PM • [link]
Oh and I forgot to say I’m currently living in Italy but will be moving back to the States in less than a month.
Elizabeth said on 11.23.06 at 01:05 PM • [link]
Dammit, I forgot to mention my religion. This is what happens when you post at 2:00 AM.
Religion: Agnostic. I really don’t know how this happened. My father was a non-practising Jew. My mother was a non-practising Christian. They occasionally took my brother and me to church, in our early childhood. Yet, despite my parent’s best efforts, Agnostic/Jew + Agnostic/Christian + occasional visit to church = Agnostic/Atheist. Who knew?
Elizabeth said on 11.23.06 at 01:08 PM • [link]
Oh, and happy (early) birthday/ homecoming to US of A to you, LorelieLong! I am insanely jealous that you get to live in Italy.
Rosemary said on 11.23.06 at 01:59 PM • [link]
I’m 24, white and Southern. It’s not really a nationality but sometimes feels that way. I’m currently living in a small, Hungarian town in Romania as a Peace Corps volunteer.
I graduated with BAs in History and Art History and have no plans to use them other than to impress people in art museums.
I’m straight but don’t really care what anyone else does. I’m Episcopalian, and while I don’t go to church here, I plan to start going again when I move home.
I started sneaking my mother’s books at night, staying up till 2AM and then sneaking them back to the stack. I read Emilie Loring, Grace Livingston Hill and Elizabeth Calder(?) for a few years but always reading the classics as well.
I read voraciously and can read two books a day. Romance pulls me out of my daily life quickly and makes me forget I’m living in a Communist bloc and 5000 miles away from home.
Romance is one of the few genres that allows me to fall completely into the story without much work. When I read for pleasure, I want it to be an easy and quick slide into the story. I appreciate a good love story and get a giggle out of the Harlequin books.
Mary said on 11.23.06 at 02:14 PM • [link]
Right….well, I’m 21 (but 22 in 5 days, and I feel like my life is flashing before my eyes), from New Zealand, pakeha (white), of upper- middle class parents. I never really went to church, but I guess I espouse generally christian values - whatever that means. I don’t slut around or kill people, anyway.
I’m smart; people tend to think I’m REALLY smart and try and have conversations involving words like ‘epistemological’ and ‘ontology’ with me and expect me to know what they mean - I should, but I don’t. I just finished honours in classics, and now I’m off to teacher’s college, where I can learn to teach maths. As you do.
As for reading, I read anything and everything. I read fast, so I began reading romance novels because they were cheap and easy to find and there were lots of them. I stayed for the hilarity and the happy endings. I’ve been reading mills and boon since I was about ...13? Maybe even 12. My mother wasn’t too impressed. I stepped up to chunkier stuff around 17, but only really got into them around the end of last year. I particularly like pirates and sea captains. To a quite pathetic degree, even.
I have to admit that sometimes I think ‘my god, why am I reading this crap?’..but in general that only comes out when I’m reading particularly badly written beasties. Or when my flatmate is sitting there looking at me with disdain, I feel compelled to hide or justify my reading choice. I’m working on that one though.
Marianne McA said on 11.23.06 at 03:06 PM • [link]
I’m impressed, basically. Tempted to give myself a spurious IQ, and a more interesting sex life.
I’m a 43 year old white female. From N.Ireland, I’d regard myself as British. My degree is in Philosophy, and I’ve a post grad in teaching. I’m reasonably bright, but not more than that. I’m heterosexual, and worse than that, Presbyterian. Sunday School teacher. Married for 20 years [after falling in love at first sight] and have three children.
Came to romance through loving fairy stories, via Georgette Heyer and Mary Stewart. I’d think of romance as fairy tales for grown-ups, but I don’t think it’s any sillier, or even any more optimistic than any other genre. Or perhaps I just chose books that are optimistic in tone in whatever genre I’m reading in. Not reading a great deal of romance right now - nothing jumping off the shelves at me.
As for the other - tinker, tailor, soldier, sailor, cynic, sceptic, idealist, realist.
I’m not consistent - some things I trust in, some things I doubt.
Lauri "Why Are You Dressed Like Rerun?" Doublevie said on 11.23.06 at 03:18 PM • [link]
Let’s see…
I’m 21. Even though I look like I could be 100% African, I’m actually white, Native American, Italian, West Indian, and African. I’m a girl. I get along with guys more than girls both platonically and romantically (guys match my personality more than most girls), so I’m a hetero (or “breeder” in homosexual slang). I was raised Catholic, but I’m not devout. I do believe that there is a God, despite the people born on and the events that happen on Earth that suggest otherwise. I’m in my last year of college, majoring in Writing For Film and TV (a fancy phrase for “scriptwriting”) with a minor in video production.
Mostly I read classic literature and anything with humor in it, but I do dip into the occasional romance novel.
Nathalie said on 11.23.06 at 03:28 PM • [link]
Female, French Canadian, mid-thirties, married with one kid, too cynical to believe in anything bigger than human beings. I agree with George Carlin, who says, as a species, that we’re fucked.
Reading preferences: always was reader of fantasy. Used to spit and stomp on romance because of too many failed tries at Harlequin novels. Discovered romantic genre a couple of years ago and accepted that yes, there’s some bad shit out there, but there are also gems. Was lucky enough to find this site. Gave me hope in the genre. I now read and write both fantasy and romance.
I’m also an older sister, ex-soldier, high school drop-out, dog owner (or dog owned), half couch potato/half intermittent jogger, wannabe renovator and avid reader who watches too much television, sinks too much money in clothes, likes animals more than humans, recycles, wore braces, never downloads copyrighted stuff, was a nerd without the grades, has a belly laugh that turns heads in theaters, can’t stand bullying, is mother hawk more than mother hen, votes even if candidates aren’t that great and thinks formal education is highly overrated (probably because I have little).
Next.
meardaba said on 11.23.06 at 04:02 PM • [link]
Reading these posts makes me feel less alone. ;D
I started reading romance when I was about 14, on a dare, and just didn’t stop. I’m like the majority of you; I started reading quite young and the YA books when I was that age sucked so I moved on to literature and pulp fiction. I liked the pulp better. My family, also a bunch of bibliophiles, thinks that I am wasting my intelligence on romance novels, but they’re not much more for me than an escape. Oh, and I HATE murder mysteries - I mean, why do I want to read about death? He’s gonna come for me someday, I’d rather not waste my time reading about him.
Demographics?
I’m 22, female, very very white (in the sense that I can’t even tan, I just burn like a mofo), AngloCanadian, completely atheist. My parents didn’t even bother with that stuff. I’m hetero, but think women are much nicer to look at then men, a raging bibliophile, and love the idea of being a “skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanist”. I have a BA in Modern Languages (aka. the I-suck-at-communicating-in-4-languages-not-just-one BA) and I now live in Germany and teach young German students to hate English. It’s a calling, I guess.
Ooo, maybe I can traslate “skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanist” into German and teach it to my students? That might excite them…
Nora Roberts said on 11.23.06 at 04:11 PM • [link]
I was born a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. The youngest of five and only girl in an Irish-Catholic family. I’m a lapsed Catholic. Everyone read in my family; books were everywhere. For the first nine years of my education, the nuns were in charge—I credit them, gratefully, with the discipline and guilt I use daily in my work.
I married the first time at 17. Why didn’t my mother lock me in my room? Ah well. I wanted babies, so I got me two wonderful sons, and got rid of the husband. It was a very good trade.
My math and science skills aren’t, basically, but along with my high school diploma I have two honorary PhDs. I love them because they required no thesis.
I like guys.
I own all seven seasons of Buffy on DVD, and am apparently married to the second tallest guy in the world as he’s a mere 6’7”.
I read and write Romances because relationships fascinate me. Because people, no matter who they are, where they come from, how screwed up they might be seek each other out for sex, for love, for companionship. Because, at the bottom of it, I believe love matters, that it can open us to possibilities and change us for the better.
Books that tell stories of people, their relationships, their emotions, their needs, virtues and flaws are a celebration of what makes us human. That speaks to me.
Ann Aguirre said on 11.23.06 at 04:55 PM • [link]
Wow, we really are a lot of smart bitches.
Nancy Gee said on 11.23.06 at 05:36 PM • [link]
53, granddaughter of immigrants to the US from Scotland, Italy, and Poland. I was the classic smart girl in the back of the classroom - even have the severe shortsightedness for the role - with 800 and 710 on my SATs, but was an underachiever who consistently disappointed parents and teachers alike. After getting a BA in English, I married (to avoid having to actually do something with my life!), worked minimum-pay jobs and then raised three kids. I returned to college for a teaching certificate when I was in my 40s and am now teaching in a middle school. Currently, I’m working on an MA in literature, and finding it easier than I expected to keep up with the “real” grad students who all seem to be so totally beyond me in terms of knowledge and sophistication.
Oh, and I’m an atheist - went through Methodism, Episcopalianism, and Catholicism before realizing there was nothing there for me. I seem to have raised three librul atheist outrageously funny and intelligent kids in a tiny conservative town. Not sure how that happened, but there you are. I’ve been married for over 25 years, but it devolved into a platonic roommate situation over the last 15 years or so, and so I’m celibate.
I guess I’m pretty far along on the cynicism scale. I suspect I have a bruised romantic inside, since I’m on this site at all, but she’s pretty well shielded most of the time. I trust very few people - probably only my children. Certainly not my coworkers, and definitely not the rest of my fanily.
I was always a voracious reader, and sampled some romance novels back in the 70s and 80s, when rapist heroes were thick on the ground. Not my thing, and I mostly stuck to other genres until recently. I’m trying to ease back into the genre, as an alternative to the canon and litcrit I’m reading for classes.
Right now, I have a love/hate relationship with romance. Although I like happy endings, I seldom can identify with them, since I’ve never experienced the sort of passion that’s usually depicted. That leaves me feeling rather depressed, as in WTF is wrong with *me*, that I never found a relationship like that, and never will? OTOH, if I tell myself that the romance story is a kind of fantasy, then I can buy the premise, so I tend to mentally stick romance in a slot within the fantasy genre (the characters and plots in no way reflect my reality, yanno?). I do prefer to avoid “straight up” romance, usually sticking to fantasy/romance or suspense/romance, anything in which there’s a plot not focused exclusively on the love story. That tends to ease the sting of feeling left out of the loop, so to speak.
Reading the cross-genre books also keeps me turning the pages to see how the story turns out; a plain ol’ romance is going to have the HEA preordained, so I lose interest when I already know the ending, and usually can’t finish those.
Amanda said on 11.23.06 at 06:34 PM • [link]
I’m 26 years old. My father is a retired school principal who teaches education part-time to college students. My mother’s a school librarian. I’m a librarian too, but of the corporate variety.
I was always several reading levels ahead of most kids my age, and I read ALL the time. By the time I was ten, I was reading the classics - Main Street, The Jungle, Wuthering Heights. I discovered romance novels around age 12, and my parents discouraged me from reading too many of them, wanting me to read something “better.” For a while, I went back to reading Literature, but while in graduate school, I moved back to romance. Yes, I know what’s going to happen. But it’s like my new favorite tv show, Heroes, in that way. I know that this season will end with defeating Sylar and saving New York. It’s the getting there that’s fun.
Estelle Chauvelin said on 11.23.06 at 06:35 PM • [link]
gender: female
age: 23
race: caucasian
national origin: American mutt. Irish, French, German, Scottish, Russian, and a touch of Cherokee. I like to say I’m a war on the British waiting to happen.
religion: Generic sort of Protestant. I have a lot of ideas I haven’t seen accepted by any denomination, but I think I’m Christian in the important ways.
occupation: substitute reference librarian
education: B.A. in Latin, working on a masters of library science
sexual orientation: straight
I read everything. I probably read my first Romance novel in the past two years, because that was when I first saw one that looked interesting. If I see it and it catches my eye, or if a review gives me the idea that I’d like it, I read it, and who cares about genre? (Thanks to this site for introducing me to P.C. Cast, by the way.)
snarkhunter said on 11.23.06 at 06:57 PM • [link]
I’m 27, female, heterosexual, and emphatically, eternally single. (I suppose that might fit the cliche.) I was born and grew up in the Pacific Northwest with the whitest parents you could find, though I have since lived in the Midwest and am now in Pennsylvania. I got my bachelor’s degree with Latin honors in English in 2001, my master’s in English in 2003, and should have my PhD in nineteenth-century Brit Lit some time next year.
While I admit to my peers that I enjoy romance novels and chick lit, I always say it half-defiantly, half-shamed. But I don’t really care that much what they think. I’ve always been a voracious reader, and will read anything if I think it’s good. I think the diversity of my reading tastes make me a more interesting person, and certainly a better scholar. I read fantasy, sci-fi, superhero comics, young adult novels, “literary” fiction, mysteries, and romance with equal delight…but it seems like the only one that people are likely to judge me for is the romance.
On the bright side, I can finally bond with my mom over books, and that’s worth a lot to me.
Nanna said on 11.23.06 at 07:12 PM • [link]
Reading all this is SO interesting, but I only have 25 minutes left on the computer. So I’ll write my own little bit now, and read on at a later time.
I’m a 23 year old female (not a girl, not yet a woman?) from the Netherlands, and English is my second language. Nevertheless, I read a lot of romance and chick-lit in English, even though it is hard to come by here.
I, like my sister, am intelligent above average. My knowing this without ever having been tested is obvious proof of this fact. I’m horrible with sciences and math, but am a complete language buff.
At the moment I’m working a job that pays well, but bugs me to no end, I’m suffering from mild depression, and I can’t wait until I finally get to go back to school. Which will be next September. The plan is to do a combined MA in English and American Studies, while also attaining a high school teaching license. Hopefully, 2 years into my studies, I will be allowed to spend a term in the US.
I hardly ever admit that I read romance and chick lit (I hate that term, really), because people do seem to think you must be an airhead. And following up an admission of reading romance with “but I’ve read War & Peace too!” just seems sort of sad.
My Harlequins sit in a box that’s all their own. I used to call it my goodie-box, but that seemed to have other associations for some. So now it’s known as the Box of Shame. My other romances and chick lits sit second row on my bookshelves. It’s quite sad, really.
Nanna said on 11.23.06 at 07:21 PM • [link]
I’d love an edit button right now, as I noticed I forgot quite a couple of things.
Well, I said I was from the Netherlands. My parents were atheist/fallen catholic, and divorced when I was 9. Both remarried, my father to a woman who would manage to estrange him from his kids, my mom to a lovely man. Both my parents, and my stepdad, hold several university degrees (MA’s), and lean to the left-side of the political spectrum. Which is how I was raised. I was a tiny disappointment, as I only started out for a BA in Tourism management and consultancy. But it did allow my to travel a lot, and figure out what I want to do with my life. Not to mention enable a depression. But whatever. I got my BA in 2005, with a 9/10 for a thesis that tied Jane Austen and the Brontë‘s to British Tourism. And I’m still darn proud of that.
Oh, and I am straight, though I do think that girls are actually prettier than men.
Jackie said on 11.23.06 at 08:09 PM • [link]
Note to Rosemary: Elizabeth Cadell. Not Calder. No wonder I feel old. Oh, forgot, was atheist, but my dying uncle converted me to agnosticism. My children like being agnostics, because when their Mormon, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim friends talk about religion, they can always say: “Maybe.”
Rosemary said on 11.23.06 at 09:21 PM • [link]
Thanks, Jackie. I wondered why I couldn’t find her on Google. You’re not old, I’m just an idiot.
Abby said on 11.23.06 at 09:44 PM • [link]
I’m 32, white, Canadian. Never had my IQ tested. Raised in an affluent family that fell apart when my father left my mother to fend for herself with three kids. The affluence definitely vanished at that point.
I got a cheap college diploma and went straight to work in television. I’ve been there ever since and have been steadily climbing the ladder.
But my alter ego is not satisfied, as in television you WILL meet people who brag proudly about having read only one book in their lives. I read voraciously and soak up everything I can in my off hours, and no one at work is the wiser.
Straight. Have been in a relationship for nearly a decade. We have lived together for five years, but refuse to marry and are not interested in kids, much to the puzzlement of… well, everyone. We’re just not religious, and we think marriage is a state of mind, one which we are already in.
Only discovered romance three years ago, when I decided it would probably be easy to write such simplistic trash. To prove this to myself, I picked up a book at random (it was by Mary Balogh, who I had never heard of) and couldn’t put it down, have been hooked and respectful ever since. And I’m still trying to write it.
Compared to most of the bitches here I’m a vanilla reader, as I find all non-hetero or threesome stuff a turnoff, though this has nothing to do with my politics (I think everyone should read, write, enjoy, and live life however the hell they want).
I love romance because I love men and love and sex and sweeping storylines and emotion and laughter and great writing and relationships and tears and love and men and sex.
Keziah Hill said on 11.23.06 at 11:31 PM • [link]
I’m 47 Australian and both a failed lesbian and a failed heterosexual. Lately I prefer to read and garden. Raised a Catholic, I have liberal arts degree (majored in history and philosophy) and a grad dip in health education. I worked for a long time in the criminal justice system and now work in local government.
I did the whole lesbian feminist thing in the 80s but kept falling in love with men.
I stared really reading romance about 4 years ago (before that I was a big literature and crime reader) when I started writing and everything I wrote was romantic. I’m not particularly romantic so this was a puzzle. I thought I’d better investigate so started reading and got hooked.
There is a lot of crap out there and a lot of the conventions of romance irritate me, but there are also wonderful stories full of great writing.
I also write erotica which stretches me beyond HEA, but I do like a good HEA.
Churros said on 11.24.06 at 12:49 AM • [link]
Can I? Can I?
I am 27, I was born, raised and am living in Mexico and though I want to travel the world, I don’t want to live in another country. I am a Chemical Engineer (is there any other kind of Engineering?) because it was the only career that I though it had a practical use for math and chemistry. I listen to heavy metal while reading Romance and none of my friends share my taste in music or books. My friends don’t consider me “too smart to read that” because they don’t read and they think I like Romance because I’m a sexual maniac and though the last is true, one thing has nothing to do with the other (really). I am Christian because I chose to be, but I’m not homophobic or racist because that has nothing to do with Christ. God loves you!
I work in a Scottish company and thanks to that I’ve been to Scotland two times and haven’t been able to read a Scottish romance since then.
Oh, and since I taught myself the English language, I sound very funny and my grammar is not that good.
And Brian Molko is mine!
Doina said on 11.24.06 at 01:03 AM • [link]
Hi to all, especially to Rosemary. I’m Romanian, currently living in New York for more than ten years.
As of my age, big sigh, early fifties.
Okay. I can’t really say much about my IQ, only that I came to the States against all odds, when all my friends told me that I was just mad to start anew, all by myself at an age when women settle down and look forward to grandkids. Well, I did it, and here I am with a master in library science, happily working at Columbia University in the library, cataloging and classification department. Sounds boring? Let me tell you, ladies, it is not. I am a bookworm in charge with the fiction collection. This means I read whatever I want, whenever I wand, and I read voraciously. New York Public library has a branch nearby the campus, so here I am well supplied with books.
When I landed on the American shores, my English was good only for reading. I was speaking with an awful accent (improved since). I consider that my accent was only on my tongue, didn’t affect my brain. Continuing process to improve my English and writing skills. I took a course at Creative Writing at Columbia, just to prove to myself that I can do better!
I wrote a novel in my native tongue while I was still in Bucharest, but never been published as my emigration papers came were approved when the editor was tearing apart my manuscript.
Righ now, under a creative zeal that needs to be expressed, I’m trying my hand on a novel (romance?) just for the heck of it! Work in progress, almost done.
This site helped me enormously on how NOT TO WRITE, if you know what I mean. That is, bad prose.
I read almost everyting, from The Historian (I enjoyed the hilarious critique posted here by, I believe, Candy? Or Sarah?) to the high-brow literati. But Romance is a favorite genre, along with detective, mystery stories. I love P.D. James, Elizabeth George, Kate Atkinson, John Katzenbach (The Analyst). Did not like The Da Vinci Code. Sorry! I am a fan of giant romance writers, Nora Roberts, Sandra Brown, whom I discovered since I came to the States.
Why romance? Well, hard to tell. Maybe because no matter what my biological clock tells me, clicking in my ears, I am still young at heart—a platitude that rings true to me.
I’ve been married, divorced now, straight and single (on the wrongside of age, social and financial status, size and shape) but that doesn’t deter me to keep an eye open. Just in case there’s a guy somewhere old enough and blind enough to all of the above.
I am straight, but I respect other lifestyles. My moral convictions float cocooned in common sense between liberal and conservative. Love is unconditional, or should be.
Born Orthodox Christain, stay this way, although I’m not a church goer. After reading The Urantia Book, I managed to reconcile the nebulous creationist theories with science. Both true, apparently, but who am I to judge? I only hope to find out the truth after I cross over.
I love astronomy and often times I climb up to the roof of Pupin Hall building housing the Astronomy and Astrophysics dept. at Columbia to mess around with the telescopes and peek through the lenses when the sky observation isn’t obstructed by clouds or haze. My passion for astronomy is reflected in my writing, aheam!
Cynic? Not sure. Too many wars on this embattled blue-planet, too many atrocities, too much horror, however, there’s plenty of goodness, too. Which side would prevail? We shall see.
Wishing you a happy Thanksgiving,
Truly yours,
Doina
xatya said on 11.24.06 at 02:05 AM • [link]
Age: 41
Nationality: American
Gender: female
Intelligence: Other people seem to be impressed with what they perceive as my intelligence. I think I have an aptitude for remembering outlandish trivia, and boundless curiousity. Wouldn’t call that intelligence though. Did appear on “Win Ben Stein’s Money” a few years ago. Lost horribly, but blame it on the crappy buzzer that they assigned to me. Not that I’m bitter.
Orientation: Straight, but human sexuality is a vast continuum. Have always believed that love is love—the rest is plumbing.
Race: Human, the caucasian variety.
Religion: Agnostic, and not too fussed about it.
Occupation: Barista. Apparently it is a behavioral imperative whilst living in the Pacific Northwest and attempting to be a writer.
Education: AA from a community college, plus a geek personality. I think I’ve got a Masters in something, just don’t have the piece of paper. I should get on that. *sigh*
Born and raised in DC. I am an only child whose parents were very young. Father was an avid reader, so I followed in his footsteps. He never censored my reading, so I had free reign during our weekly library trips. And trips to the used book stores. And the Library of Congress (before they closed the stacks).
Grew up on multi-cultural fairy tales. Discovered science fiction at an early age.
Started reading romance novels during what I now recognize as the slow, steaming death of my marriage. (We divorced in 1999.) Previously I had nothing but contempt for them because I believed the prejudiced viewpoints of people whose opinions I thought mattered.
Read my first romance novel by accident. One had been mis-filed in the science fiction section of my favorite bookstore. Had great fun with it, and continued to explore the genre.
Even joined the Harlequin book club. *Eep.* They gained my respect for this one thing. One month, one of the four releases turned out to be a blueprint for surviving and escaping an abusive relationship—and included the hope of developing a non-abusive and loving relationship after taking care of oneself. At the end of the book were listings of helplines and shelters that harbored abused women. The beauty was that the book looked exactly like the other three. I was so impressed that I resolved to never diss romance novels again.
The problem is that romance novels are viewed as women’s fiction. Women’s fiction has always been marginalized. Are romance readers any more dim than the men who read mercenary novels, spy novels, Westerns, etc.? Yet we do not (generally) question the intelligence of readers of these primarily male-oriented genres. Feh.
(BTW; book recommendation “Dangerous Men and Adventurous Women: Romance Writers on the Appeal of the Romance” edited by Jayne Ann Krentz) (Fascinating read, 22 essays by romance writers about their genre.)
Frankly, any author who can write compelling stories with captivating characters within the strictures of an established genre deserves admiration.
AnneD said on 11.24.06 at 02:27 AM • [link]
Skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanist fits me to a T. 33, white, married to a self confessed nerdy geek who quite likes having, at times, a nerdy geek bosomy wife with pink hair and cool glasses.
IQ…who knows? 138 or something close in the last online quiz - hmm, quality testing there huh? A consumate underachiever with a bent for sciences, but who went into the arts anyway ( I am way to crafty for my own good, but i made a mini business out of it - selling handmade, one of a kind original kids clothes on eBay!). Jack of all trades, masterof quite a few rather than none; recently as Dispensing Optician , even more recently as an erotic romance author.
My parents are fairly intelligent, not super geeks, fairly much upper middleclass whitebread - oh and I forgot to say I am a New Zealander living in Florida. I have been reading romances via mills & boon for years and years - nothing like all those 20-30yr old my boss is a millionare and I am having his secret love child stories to get a 10yr olds heart pounding. I was re-reading Cussler, Smith and all their cronies by then, courtesy of Dad’s book shelf, but got burned on a Le’Carre book - I still haven’t read one of his to this day - but Dirk Pitt (hubba hubba), if there is a god, he will be waiting for me at the pearly gates! As a speed reader romance is all about being able to step away from RL and into the cheesy. After all, you can only read so much Tolstoy before you go alittle square eyed.
Helen M said on 11.24.06 at 02:35 AM • [link]
I’m 21, (22 next month), born and raised in Hong Kong to an English father and a HK-Chinese mother, who are still married, and despite their problems, will be until they die. I have (and always have had) a British passport, and the permanent right of abode in HK. When asked, I say I’m from HK (I came to England for uni in 2002, and currently live in Scotland) and call myself British and Eurasian, and see absolutely no contradiction in doing so.
I have a BA in PPE and am waiting for my MA (Politics) dissertation to be marked. I studied for both at the same uni. Unadventurous, I know, but it made sense to stay - my uni has one of the best Politics depts in the country. No point going somewhere else just for the sake of going somewhere else, right?
Currently unemployed. Gah. I finished my MA in late Sept, and am only now getting around to applying for jobs. Not the most motivated person in the world. I like the idea of doing a PhD one day, but I just need to get away from formal education for a bit.
I’m a girl who likes boys (alpha manly men, yay!), who likes boys who likes both girls and boys, and who isn’t averse to the idea of girls, just hasn’t met one in real life who she fancies. (I’m also the kind of girl who likes to talk about herself in the third person, apparently!) So, straight, but curious, I suppose. (Hahaha, do people still even say ‘bi-curious’?)
I read pracially everything I can get my grubby little hands on. I’ve been thinking about why I read Romance recently, and I think the main reasons are the comfort, the escapism, and, depending on the author and my mood, the sex. The latter doesn’t really need any explaining, but maybe I need to explain what I mean by the first two. By calling Romances ‘comfortable’, I mean that we know there is going to be a HEA, but not only that - because I know where we’re going, I can cope with a much more fraught journey. I can let the author have the hero and heroine do things to each other / themselves that are just terrible, and irl would just ruin any chance of them ending up together. (Because there’s no way forgiveness would be forcoming, or because they’d killed themselves - or the other one - with their stupidity, or whatever). I’m not saying all Romances are comfortable/easy to read (most of my favourites have reduced me to floods of tears), but they are somehow more satisfying than, say, chicklit where the girl does not end up with the guy. Satisfying in the same kind of way detective/crime fiction is - you know our good guy is going to get the bad guy in the end, so you’re willing to let characters you have emotionally invested in do things you wouldn’t let yourself or people you care about in real life do (or not like it if they did). I’ve noticed that I’ve been reading less Romance since October - since leaving uni - and that’s why I think I read Romance for the escapism. When I was worried about failing my MA because some poor excuse for a fellow human being (not to mention a fello student!) stole my thumb drive with my dissertation on it in July, I started reading more Romance than anything else in my free time (what little of it there was, seeing as I was spending most of my days and nights hunched over my desk working on my dissertation), spending way more than I ought to have on books. Since leaving uni and settling back into my parents, I’m still reading Romance, butless, and with less ... intensity ... than when I thought my life sucked, and needed to be just be somewhere else where due dates and word counts and the like did not apply.
There are many other reasons why I read Romance, but I’m too tired to make coherent sentences out of my thoughts right now. (Also too tired to proof read this, so apologies for any typos / poor grammar.)
Part of me really enjoys the ‘wha-?’ reaction I get from people when they find out I read Romance. It pisses me off that they feel that way (‘for someone so widely read, you read a lot of crap!’) but I like surprising people.
Sorry for rambling on a bit!
Ryouki said on 11.24.06 at 04:06 AM • [link]
I am a female of mostly English descent and was born to a upper middle class family in 1985 in Southern Ontario, Canada and live in upper middle class suburbia. My parents attempted to teach me religion by taking me to church when I was about 8ish around Christmas, by Easter I’d asked to stop going as it was boring and my parents were grateful as they weren’t much for church, I’m a animist. Fairly smart, no where near the level of some of my friends at school. I’m in university taking East Asian Religion, English and classical history. I’m somewhere around a Kinsey 2.5. I started reading romance when I ran out of books for my age and education level, got bored and went looking on my parents book shelf (it was Nora’s Divine Evil or V.C. Andrews and I’d heard things about attics so Andrews was a no-go) and haven’t stopped since. I have gotten multiple friends addicted to them; I find that starting on the ‘laugh at it’ line works, and before long your discussing the good points. I read romance now because they’re mostly no where near as pretensions as some fantasy books are.
PS. I suck at Math and Spelling… sorry about the spelling aspect.
Claire said on 11.24.06 at 04:32 AM • [link]
Gender:Female
Age:20
Race:Caucasion (German-Lithuanian-Scotch-Irish-Polish)
National Origin: US of A
Religion: Athiest
Occupation: Ticket/consession bitch at a privately owned movie theater
Education Level: College Sophmore (major in 3D Fine Arts)
Sexual Orientation: Straight (not for lack of trying the other side…but theres just no zing there for me)
Why I read Romance Novels: Oh boy…well lets start at the beginning.
When I was in 7th grade I went through that akward angsty phase everyone goes through and I turned to two things to ease my inner soul tortue. They would be the “gang” down the street and romance novels. Luckily I ditched the gang after about 6 months but the romance novels stuck.
I read them because they’re an escape from the real world. Sure they’ve got pitfalls and fuck-ups but in the end you know the lead male and lead female will boink and be together in lurve, which is something you very rarely get in the real world.
I’m also a self proclaimed pervert (not in a “I touch little kiddies” way! In a “everything makes me think about sex” way) and have spent a large chunk of my life going “why does nobody talk about this stuff?! don’t you think about it constantly too?!” Romance novels were (and still are) a place where I can get a decent story as well as lots and lots of sexy-sexy.
Claire said on 11.24.06 at 04:36 AM • [link]
Forgot a point I was going to make…sorry:
My roomate pulls out this quote often in her explination of why what I read is “trash”
It’s what you read when you don’t have to, that determines what you’ll be when you can’t help it.
Just something I thought the Smart Bitches might want to mull over…
Sherry Thomas said on 11.24.06 at 05:25 AM • [link]
Test Scores
GRE: 1600
GMAT 800
Take that, a great, big F-U to the stupid stereotype.
I was born and raised in mainland China. Came to the States when I was thirteen. Started reading romance as soon as I could scrape together enough English. On one of the first historical romances I picked up (back then they were all historicals), thinking that a governess was a female governor, I kept wondering why she had absolutely no power at all and took care of this dude’s kids instead of running the state.
I knew what dukes and earls were before I figured out what “t & a” meant. Learned fifty ways to describe that heavenly place between her legs before I learned the word “to pee”.
And I started writing romances myself before I was finally pointed in the direction of the great writers of the genre. Thank God for the internets.
I’m a non-meditating Buddhist who took a while to reconcile writing romance and believing life is suffering (the trick is to use the Third Noble Truth, which states that pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional).
Otherwise, I’m just a regular suburban housewife soccer mom who happens to write romance for money and just for this year, attend school for a master’s degree in accounting.
Kel said on 11.24.06 at 07:05 AM • [link]
I’m a 19 year old Caucasian female. I was born in South Africa, moved to Massachusetts when I was 5, lived in Canada for 6 weeks during 7th grade when our visa expired, moved back to Massachusetts, and then moved to Georgia after my senior year of high school. I’m a student at UGA. I’m an accounting major currently. I’m not religious, and I’m uncomfortable around religious people. I’m straight, but appreciate the beauty of women more than men. I read everything I could get my hands on when I was a kid, and then moved on to my mom’s books at an age where I felt like I had to keep it a secret when the books had sex scenes.
My favorite books are anything starring women, fantasy, chick lit, and romance novels because there are just so many out there that you’re never short of something to read!
eggs said on 11.24.06 at 09:52 AM • [link]
Claire said: It’s what you read when you don’t have to, that determines what you’ll be when you can’t help it.
——-
So does that mean when the chips are down I’m going to risk it all for the best sex of my life, with the world’s hunkiest guy and we’re going to overcome all odds to live Happily Ever After? Damn. That would suck soooooo much if it happened IRL.
Poor Mr. Eggs. I’m going to miss him so much ...
eggs.
Emily said on 11.24.06 at 10:37 AM • [link]
Female, born in 1987 in Canada to parents of essentially British and Dutch descent, raised Anglican/Episcopalian, full-time university student and part-time barista, completing second year studies heading for a Fine Arts degree, and I consider myself asexual.
I read romance because I like it. It’s gratifying if it’s good, and if it’s bad I can get my snarkiness on, even if it’s just to myself. It’s escapist fiction, as well, given that with school I’m usually sick to death of academic reading by the end of the day.
I had a writing teacher who went to a writer’s conference and was shocked/surprised when there turned out to be a bunch of big-name romance and sci-fi authors attending the workshops on dialogue and character development. As if she didn’t expect those things to matter to “genre” writers—which she often says in a rather condescendingly derogatory tone, as if she doesn’t mean to overtly insult them, but as she told our writing class, she’s “here to teach us how to make art.”
Excuse me if I want my art to be a damn good romance novel.
So right now I mostly read romance novels to give the intellectual finger to those people I meet with on a daily basis who seem to think that the only thing worth writing or reading has to be some kind of moody coming-of-age novel by a blind former cocaine dealer.
SarahP said on 11.24.06 at 06:12 PM • [link]
Female, white, 40, atheist, university administrator/writer, PhD in English lit, bi, married (to man), two kids, adore Loretta Chase and Elizabeth Peters (among others).
Sarah F. said on 11.24.06 at 06:12 PM • [link]
This is cool!
Gender: Female
Age: 32
Race: White
National origin: Born in South Africa (only one with THAT I’ve seen so far). Moved to UK at age 7, moved back to SA at 8, moved to USA at 14. 8 years in NJ, 8 years in MI, 3 years in NC.
Religion: Brought up atheist. Not quite there anymore, but will never be Christian.
Occupation: College English Professor at an Historically Black University in NC.
Education level: Ph.D. in English Literature from UMichigan
Sexual orientation: Well, that’s a tricky one. Mostly heterosexual, but I identify as sexually dominant more than anything else. Let’s leave it there.
My IQ tested as 155 when I was 15. My SATs were 1470 (in the days before the essay test).
I’m happily married to my high school boyfriend. We’ve got one child and have been desperately trying to have another one for 18 months to no avail.
I started reading before I can remember. My mother gaves me Ayn Rand’s “Atlas Shrugged” when I was 12, which is about the same time I started sneaking her romances. I basically got my Ph.D. in the 18thC version of popular romances and now I’m trying to be a part of a new wave of romance-positive academic criticism.
closetcrafter said on 11.24.06 at 06:58 PM • [link]
Why do y’all have to be so young?
I’m a white 39y old teenile (will give explanation if necc.)married mommy of 2. I am a girl geek dentist. I only pratice 8 hrs a month, however.
Unexpectedly bright. Something about the way I look causes people to assume I’m ditzy until I open my mouth and embarrass them. Sometimes that angers me and sometimes it amuses me.
I couldn’t stop reading romance even if I tried. Its the ultimate escape. Although this site is becoming a close 2nd.
I find my self snorting and crying with laughter at this stuff and I have to admit, I am thrilled when I see authors post info. I forget they are real people sometimes.
Anon said on 11.24.06 at 08:35 PM • [link]
I just wanted to say that you guys have single-handedly contradicted the romance-reader stereotypes for me. I’m still not a romance reader myself, but I love coming here.
Heather said on 11.24.06 at 11:00 PM • [link]
I’m 28 and I live in Austin, TX. I’m married to a machinist who works in custom motorcycle shop. I have two stepkids and a chihuahua. I have an MA in History and an MS in Information Studies. I work as a tech writer and a reference librarian. I am an agnostic. I’m…mostly straight with bi tendencies; I’ve just never had the situation arise, and I don’t expect it to now that I’m married. Lesbians are hot.
I read everything. Books keep me sane. Going to the bookstore and shopping on Amazon are my biggest comfort. I’ve been reading romance since…the age of 10, maybe? My mom is an avid romance reader. She reads about 300 books a year, I swear. When I was a kid, she traded romances with a neighbor, and always came home from the grocery store with a pile of paperbacks. She kept her romances stacked in the windowsills of her bedroom. I would sneak a few when she wasn’t looking. She caught me reading one in my closet and halfheartedly forbade me to read them. I didn’t listen. She still jokes with me about my romance-sneaking habits. Now that I’m an adult, we trade romances; we have a fondness for paranormals and La Nora.
So after romances, I moved to sci-fi/fantasy, and then onto “literature”, but lately I’ve been going back to my roots and reading romances and bad epic fantasy. Screw what other people think. I think balance and variety is the key. Right now I’m reading the Alan Moore pornography and Special Topics in Calamity Physics.
My favorite romances: I love paranormals, sci-fi/fantasy romance, erotica, BDSM-type stories, lesbian/gay stories, historicals (esp medievals and westerns), Black Lace. I don’t really like contemporaries, unless they have a unique twist. I have a fondness for sheikhs just because it’s so fucking hilarious.
In terms of characters, I love the tortured “Stranger in a Strange Land” character…fish out of water stories. I like my men complex and emotional. I love nerds. The strong, silent type. Toughness and vulnerability. I like big guys, which is why I married a hairy, hulking greaser.
My favorite romance is The Time Traveler’s Wife. I sheepishly admit that I love Diana Gabaldon.
Elayna said on 11.24.06 at 11:42 PM • [link]
I am 26 and live in the UK (A little North of centre). I am of Irish Catholic descent, which is pretty strict, but I stopped practising years ago. I still live at home because crippling student debts and a low trainee salary means that I cannot yet afford to move out.
I have a degree in Law, a masters in Commercial Law and I am currently training to be a lawyer. I work in Commercial Property Law at the moment, so for once it is nice to read something that isn’t wrapped up in Legal-speak and doesn’t send me to sleep. I am never going to save the world but I enjoy what I do.
I like men, but a I do like the description my friend had of sexuality, namely that it was a sliding scale between liking men and women - some people are definitely at one end or the other, whilst most are somewhere in between with a bias towards one side.
As a child I was a very fast reader to the point that I read my local library dry, working first through the childrens books, then young adults and then adults.
I quickly moved onto the one section that was updated frequently - Mills and Boon. My mom weaned me off these by suggesting Jilly Cooper. After that I just started picking up books which looked like romances.
Most of my friends know that I enjoy romance novels by now, especially after looking through my Amazon wishlist, and some have even confessed that they like similar books. In fact I often exchange books with a couple of different friends to get greater variety. My mom reads most of the books that I do, whilst my dad pretends not to notice what I read.
I am a cynic and a pessimist at heart with the theory that whilst it would be nice if real life followed romance novels, it will never happen, but for the three hours it usually takes to read a novel, it is nice to suspend reality for a while.
Alexandra said on 11.25.06 at 12:07 AM • [link]
Hi! Sitting up from lurkerdom for my first post:
I’m a mostly-single, black, 24 year-old Philadelphian who works as a fundraiser at one of the local hospitals—no, I’m not a telemarketer. As a graduate of an Ivy League university with a BA in English (ah, those wasted thousands), I get harassed by friends, professors, and co-workers for reading several dozen romance novels each year. It would be okay if I picked up Heinlein or Palaniuk, but God forbid I read Krentz or Roberts.
Though I’ve rediscovered my buried Catholicism, I still find myself scoffing at a number of the Church’s teachings, so “skeptical foul-mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ secular humanist” works for me too. Currently, I’m prepping for the GMATs so that I can escape the pit of financial despair (with greater financial despair) my undergrad student loans have visited upon me.
I’ve loved romance novels since my mom bought me a bagful in an attempt to keep me away from frat parties in my sophomore year, and some six hundred books later, I still love the journey and power games a hero and heroine will face to get to their HEA. I live for historical and paranormal romances—if I combine and get a Regency vampire, Restoration witch, or Victorian werewolf, I’m happy as a clam.
bam said on 11.25.06 at 12:15 AM • [link]
I’m a twenty-something ex slacker who’s done it all. The True Hollywood Stories you watch on the E! channel? I could have had one of those, but after six months of starving, working as a dishwasher (a light tester, a valet parker, a Hooter girl, and door-to-door knife seller), I decided that Hollywood was not for me and went home. I’ve got 2 really interesting rehab stories, 1 boring one, and a hilarious arrested-in-Mexico story. Oh, I’ve been to Niece and the Isle of Greece while I’ve sipped champagne on a yacht
I’ve moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo and showed ‘em what I’ve got. I’ve been undressed by kings and I’ve seen some things that a woman ain’t supposed to see. I’ve been to paradise, but I’ve never been to me (man, that song is super-awesome). I don’t have a degree, but am currently working on it (I’m a reformed bad girl gone straight… well, not too straight). I haven’t decided if I want to go to grad school yet, but if I did, I’d probably go to SFSU for an MFA. I’ve made very stupid decisions in my life, but have also made brilliant ones. I can destroy any of you in Trivial Pursuit: Pop Culture.
I read romance novels because they’re funny, cheesy, definitely over-the-top, but they’re also the most sincere fiction I’ve come across in my years of voracious reading.
Oh, and I like boys and girls. Especially lean, muscled blond boys with green eyes. And hot Tokyo chicks.
Jami said on 11.25.06 at 12:50 AM • [link]
White, 34, married, 1 kid, another on the way. Romance reader and writer (Kalen and I share an editor). Straight, but have my female crushes (Gwen Stefani, anyone?) Consider myself spiritual but not religious. As far as intelligence, I graduated from Stanford with BA in English (my two CP’s are also Stanford Grads, and I recently learned author Shannon McKenna is a Yalie), so I guess I’m smart enough. Known for my biting sarcasm and generally snarky attitude. Was known as one of the “surly girls” when I did Team in Training a few years back. Was once told by a guy that I’m “one of those mean girls. You’re the kind of girl who would say, ‘Come back when your dick is bigger.’” Don’t know if that makes me cynical, but I sure as shit am not sweet. And yet, ever since I picked up the Flame and the Flower at age 13 I’m a total sucker for reading about people falling madly, eternally in love.
bam said on 11.25.06 at 01:39 AM • [link]
This is totally off-topic, but since we all seem to be in a confessional mood…
When no one’s around, I strip off to my underwear and totally rock out to Ricky Martin.
Meljean Brook said on 11.25.06 at 11:55 AM • [link]
Hi, I’m Meljean, and I love romance novels.
I’m 29, a converted Muslim (but not a very good one, just like I wasn’t a good Christian or athiest, pagan or agnostic, but it sure was fun trying all of them on for size), female, a bit geeky with a powerful love for superheroes. I grew up in a small Oregon town, read my little ass off because everyone in my family reads their ass off, and was quite certain I’d be a jockey until my little ass grew a lot taller.
I have a BA in English Lit, dropped out of grad school and quit my bookkeeping job so that I could write full time, don’t care about my IQ and am just happy I’m not stupid (though that’s debatable on Monday nights), love Milton and Johanna Lindsey equally but for far different reasons.
I think girls are pretty and yummy, but I’m monogamous with a guy whose man-titty could shame Nathan Kamp (but not shame Batman, who is the one man I might give up monogamy for, so it’s lucky for my husband that Bruce is just a two-dimensional drawing and I have no interest in getting papercuts on certain areas of my anatomy), who doesn’t care if I wear a hijab or not (sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t) and we don’t blow stuff up (although sometimes I think about it, but not for the stereotypical reason or the usual targets.)
I’ve been reading romance since I was eight, and have logged my schizophrenic journey on my blog, mostly to my embarrassment—because, really, the little girl I was at eight is not much different from the writer I am at 29.
I read romance because I believe in superheroes, because friction and heat between two or more people makes the world interesting and I like to see it written in language, and because I love the tight warm feeling in my gut when two characters I’ve come to care about are going to make it to the HEA.
And for other reasons, but I’m also lazy. I would compound that by eating bon-bons, but I really prefer ice-cream by the pint.
SandyW said on 11.25.06 at 06:44 PM • [link]
Assorted and random demographic information.
I’m 47. Female. Born and raised in Kentucky, US; I still live in the same part of the country. Mostly white, although there’s a little variety in my ancestry here and there. I’m straight, not from any convictions on the matter; I just seem to be made that way. I can view other women as attractive/sexy, but I’ve never met one I actually wanted to get physical with. I’ve been married to the same man for almost 25 years. Two kids, one grown (theoretically) and one almost there.
I have an IQ somewhere around 135/140, depending on the test. I have a Bachelor’s in Paralegal Studies, which I have never actually made a living with, although the degree did help me get the job I have now, Library Assistant, which is a step below a real Librarian. That would require a Master’s, which I just don’t have the inclination to get.
I’m a Christian, although not of the hellfire and brimstone variety. In reading the Bible, it seems to me that Jesus spent most of his time on earth comforting the afflicted and afflicting the comfortable. He had a lot of critical things to say about the conservative religious establishment of His day. The Bible also says we shouldn’t be judgmental; we should worry about our own behavior, not other people’s. I’m thinking those angry men I see on TV all the time, ranting about stuff, must have a very different translation of the Bible than I do. ;-)
Why do I read romance? Because I like the emotional intensity. Because I like the sex, especially if it fits the story. Partly because I am a cynic and books that end with everything working out properly help to balance out my natural tendency toward excess skepticism. I don’t have to have the over-the-top-HEA, with two kids and a house in the country, but I get a sense of satisfaction over an ending that assures me that yes, this relationship has a chance. Because sometimes I just find a romance to be entertaining for a few hours and there’s nothing wrong with that. Because I believe in love and I believe that it’s possible to live (mostly) happily ever after.
Romance is not the only type of book that I read, but it fills a particular spot.
Cynthia said on 11.25.06 at 07:43 PM • [link]
I’m 47, happily married to the same man for 20 years, straight but not narrow minded about other people’s alternate sexualities, and have four children.
I’ve been reading romance since I was about 13. I would stay at my grandmother’s house during the summer and the only thing there to read was either true confession magazines or inspirational romances by Emily Loring and Grace Livingston Hill. Boy did that warp my mind. I also read a lot of science fiction because my dad was a rabid science-fiction fan, and again that was pretty much all there was to read at home.
I have a bachelor of science degree in scientific and technical communications, with minors in biology and chemistry. My IQ is around 140 to 155 depending on what kind of IQ test I’ve taken.
I love reading romance novels, especially anything that is in the science fiction genre. I also write romance novels for Ellora’s Cave in the science fiction and paranormal genres.
From what I am reading here, I’m pretty typical of the smart bitch variety of romance fan.
rowan said on 11.25.06 at 08:02 PM • [link]
I’m a happily married, non-cynical 32 year old female living in the Pacific NW. I speak enough Japanese to communicate with my husband’s family when we visit them in Japan, but not as much as I’d like. I was born and raised back on the East Coast where I went to college and graduated with Honors and Phi Beta Kappa. After that I pursued my first Master’s degree and had an internship with an amazing mentor. She was an incredibly smart woman who had finished her PhD while raising a bunch of kids. She told me that one of the things that helped her through that whole process was unwinding with a good romance. I figured if she could be so smart and still read romances (fool that I was I thought “smart†people didn’t read romance novels), I could too.
As soon as I read my first romance novel I knew I’d found another “home.†I’d always been a voracious reader- but primarily of mysteries and fantasy (and of course I liked the ones with romance the best- duh!). Since then, I’ve gone on to get another Master’s degree (this one in library science) and have continued to devour different kinds of romance. My current favorites are definitely the paranormals.
My parents have been happily married for almost 35 years. I don’t currently practice any religion but grew up in a household where my mom took us to church every Sunday but my dad didn’t go, so I’d say our house was kinda 50/50 on the religion front. I kept the broader “love they neighbor†mandates and pretty much chucked the rest of the specific rules. My mom was the parental reader in the house and she thought romance novels weren’t worth reading. I still can’t admit to her that I read them, but I’m working up to it!
Asrai said on 11.26.06 at 12:43 AM • [link]
Oh yay. I lurk here but I love the bitches and I love the novels. I love love.
Let’s see i’m 25, Canadian. I could have metis status if my dad would give me the papers. But that’s another story. My parents divorced when I was 16.
I have always read romance. It started when my mom would leave her books around and I would read little snippets.
Now days it’s a reward for getting “real” work done.
I love writing romance as well. Bi, straight, lots of kink stuff, poly relationships. As long as it ends in lots of sex and “i love yous”.
I am pansexual. I am equavilent to married, with my baby’s daddy. She’s 4. I work part time and I go to school in my spare time. Another 8 months and I should be a certifited special needs asstiant (formerly known as teacher’s aide).
I love to read on metaphysical things like the Law of Attraction (jerry and ester hicks) and flowdreaming.com.
Why do I read romance? Because it’s fun. It gives me that squidy feeling inside to see two people ride off into the sun set. Because I still hope that everyone can have someone(s) and have lots of sex and “I love yous.”
Shay said on 11.26.06 at 12:46 AM • [link]
I’m a 22 year old black American who born in California, lived in Kansas for three years, spent ten years in Virginia and now lives again in California with my mom and two brothers (I attended six elementary schools by 2nd grade!). I began reading romances at 18 after I was forced from college because I couldn’t afford to go—but am now in community college getting my degree in fashion design, english and history(and I’ve found that it’s more freeing to go to college later on) with the hopes of becoming a successful fashion designer and writer of historical fiction(with strong romantic elements). I’d be a stereotype of a black american what with the struggling single parent household and the drug addict/alcoholic runaway dad but for the grace of God—I’m a Christian, natch. I didn’t believe in using SAT scores to chart my intelligence, but I know that I’m better equipped than most due to my balance of street and book smarts. I’m single because most guys are immature, but beneath the tough and cynical exterior I present to the world, I’m a believer in love. I have my convictions but I don’t believe in pressing them on other nor judging anyone else—I’m certainly less than perfect. I heart the Genre of books that is romance because no other genre seems to get the mix of love and sex just right—it’s either raunchy and cynical or cold and clinical, or all four—and I love the very best of the genre for the way they can be character studies of people falling in love; very sweet. Most of all, I love the comraderie of the genre from both writers and readers, I’ve never felt the “love” the way I have from romance readers and writers.
Rosemary said on 11.26.06 at 03:04 AM • [link]
I’m the youngest child and only girl born to a couple of white Presbyterians in 1975. My brothers and their friends didn’t realize that I was a girl until I got a bra in the 6th grade, so I learned a lot more about the way boys think by the time I was 13 than most women know at 37.
I have a MLS, and use my profession to get laid whenever possible, which is much more frequently than most people realize. (Boys have a thing with being able to say that they’ve nailed a librarian.) And while I think women are pretty, I have my own vagina and no interest in figuring out anyone else’s. I’m not married, and I’m quite content not having to deal with another person’s shit on a daily basis.
I work for one of the largest religious universities in the world, but only because they offered me a job when no one else would.
I read romance novels because I want to read about a happy ending without having to think too much.
Bethany said on 11.26.06 at 07:34 PM • [link]
Hi! ‘nother lurker here.
Me, briefly: 22 year old, politically liberal bisexual white Christian female, currently a graduate student in a Ph.D. program in social psychology, married to a lovely guy. Born to conservative Christian parents, spent my childhood in Bolivia while my parents built houses for Habitat for Humanity. I’m what most people refer to as “scary-smart” and I consider reading books to be my primary hobby (followed by knitting, another “only old ladies with pilly acrylic cardigans do this” sort of hobby). I read mainly scifi and fantasy, with romances as an occasional pleasure. As to why I read romances, I like reading about people, and romances are about as people-focused as books can be. I also have an academic interest in sex (alongside my non-academic interest, naturally) and how we build narratives around the sexual act and its meaning for both partners, and I plan to write a romance novel some day.
Reneesance said on 11.27.06 at 02:19 AM • [link]
Such fun stuff to read!
Here’s my turn.
Age: 29
Ethnicity: Anglo Mutt
Degree: BA in Historic Preservation (which I’ve never used) and a double major in Theatre (which is easier to get a job in with a bachelors degree)
Job: Assistant costume shop manager for a large university’s theatre program.
Family: Grew up in the sticks of western Maryland to happily married highly functional parents. Mom is Catholic and dad is Methodist and I was raised Catholic and still practice even though I dispair of current church doctrines a lot of times. But my Great grandfather always said “you have to have faith for yourself” so there ya go. My mom read romance novels constantly and around 13 I started stealing them with her permission and was loaned harlequins and sillouettes by my 80 something very catholic great aunt.
I’ve been in a strong relationship for seven years with a very nice boy that I married over two years ago, I’m straight but that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate beauty (and hubby loves it when I flip through the magazines with him).
I read romances because even though I’m very level headed I still believe in happily ever after…oh and I like the sex, lots of it, with accesories and hardware even (at least in my reading literature) And I love to read stories with strong characters interacting in interesting ways.
missrepresentation said on 11.27.06 at 10:07 AM • [link]
Wow, this has been some fascinating reading! Now about moi…
I’m 21 years old, born, raised, and still living in a small city in upstate NY. I’m white, female, and most days, I tell the world I’m straight, although I’ve known since middle school that I lean a lot closer to the bi side of the spectrum. It’s just a matter of admitting that to the people around me, and, I suppose, accepting it for myself.
My dad was a clinical social worker and my mom was a teacher. They never tested my IQ as a child, because they didn’t think that the tests were accurate and because they knew I was smart, it didn’t matter to them. I started reading when I was 4 and I haven’t stopped since. I’m a book addict, especially when it comes to buying books that I will read in a day and then never touch again. I also am one of those people who takes 40 books out of the library at once.
Despite the lack of IQ-testing, I was considered freakishly smart in elementary school. I was always in the 99th percentile on standardized tests, went to “smart kid” camp through Johns Hopkins, etc. I kept up the good grades through out middle school and high school, although occasionally they would fall drastically because I was not a big fan of homework. I was a Nathional Merit scholar, and I got a 1340 (770 on verbal and 570 on math, which is not my favorite) on my SATs, which probably could have been better, but again, not so much with the studying.
My junior year of high school, I got sick for the first time (unknown mono-type virus that caused encephalitis) and as soon as I got better from that (I even put in the effort to do the work at home and finish my junior year over the summer), I started having problems with my blood pressure, heart, and fainting. I had to repeat my senior year, but finally did graduate. Because of my medical problems, I went to community college, where I was sick on and off and hated my classes, which were boring, easy, and filled with people who looked at me funny if I answered a question. After two and a half semesters, I decided to take some time off college to “find myself,” got an internship in politics (Go Dems!), and started feeling better physically and mentally. I felt like I was finally starting to get my life back together and then in March, my dad passed away unexpectedly. My house was flooded in June, and my plans to go back to school got set aside. I’ve been struggling with some severe depression and anxiety this year, but most days, I feel like things are getting better. I’ve got a job working as a cashier at Target, and I’m good at it, which is a big confidence booster. I’m much better physically, except for an immune system that’s still pretty crappy. My mom and I are going to be moving back into our newly renovated (ha) house in December, and I’m going to start off taking a non-matriculated class at our local state university next semester.
As far as religion is concerned, I’m still searching. Right now I’d consider myself a non-practicing, extremely liberal Christian, although believing in any higher power has been hard this year! I’ve tried to be a Methodist, a Quaker, a Unitarian Universalist, and a Catholic, all to no avail.
Why do I like romance? Hmmm. Mostly, as I said above, I like books in general. I read pretty much anything and everything. Romances, in particular, appeal to me because of the happily ever after. In a romance novel, the heroine can go through ten different kinds of hell, and think that her life is a total wreck, and then, all of a sudden, things will start looking up when she meets this wonderful man and falls in love. I don’t want a man to rescue me; I want to rescue myself and meet a partner along the way.
The sex also appeals to me. I’m a virgin, and likely to stay that way for quite a while, as I’m very social around girls, and with guys as friend, but lack the confidence to flirt or pursue guys romantically and they never seem to be interested in pursuing me. (Another thing I love about romance novels—- guys who make the effort.)
I’m also a huge fan of well-written dialogue, and romance has some of the best out there.
Sorry for rambling so long; when I start to talk about myself like this I generally can’t stop. Probably because I hold back so much in my everyday life. I’m always worried about presenting a perfect, smiling face to the world.
thirstygirl said on 11.27.06 at 11:59 AM • [link]
I am 32, have an Honours degree in History and studying for a post-grad diploma in banking. I work for the IT side of a bank. I am not religious per se, because I was born in a Christian cult which we escaped when I was small and I am cynical about organised religion as a result. My father is a minister and I have 5 siblings who have taken over grandchild production duties. I am currently single, bisexual with a leaning towards boys, but will never be able to stop kissing girls.
I am a compulsive reader in most genres, with a book-buying problem, and I act as the general recommender/bookpimp to my group of friends. I have been reading romances since I first stole a Georgette Heyer from my grandmother- These Old Shades- at the age of 9. I have been gunshy about telling people that I read them but less so now as it turns out that a large number of my female friends also read romances.
I have to say my romance-reading friends and I are college-educated, politically liberal, personally cynical, widely-read, socially active, feminists. So I don’t know what you can make of that but there seem to be a lot of us out there. And we are not reading the chicklit books, which are marginally less stigmatised in our country, but the historicals and the paranormals and the fantasy/romance crossovers.
EvilAuntiePeril said on 11.27.06 at 03:06 PM • [link]
I’ve been finding it really interesting reading everyone’s stories, but Candy asked nicely. In the interests of science, I’ve bound and gagged the smart-arse monkeys.
mmmfffooknnyecantaikoorlivesbutyecannataikoorfree-wsfrgt
. Doesn’t seem to help the loggorhea, though.
SWF, politically liberal, 30, born in Canada with Scandanavian (in the broadest possible sense) antecedents. Moved to the UK as a teenager. This has given me zero melanin, a great deal of messy hair, and a few different passports which I’ve used as an excuse to kick around the planet a decent amount. Currently living in Prague. I’d say that cynicism is this squishy romantic’s condom. Probably black and studded, “for her pleasure”.
I seem to be plonked on the straightish side of the sexuality continuum. Life’s too short and I’m too picky about other things to have plumbing become an issue, but so far for me, although women are prettier, men smell nicer. When it comes to ritual, my roots are Anglican. There’s also a big dollop of Lutheranism from the maternal side, leavened by a couple of Buddhists and a few elderly great-aunts who still tip a shawl fringe in the direction of the old spirits. But seeing it all up-close from an early age (father’s in the business) means that at least some of my less-than-charitable views on the institution were acquired honestly.
I’ve always been completely obsessed with books. Family legend holds that I taught myself to read after guests began climbing out of upper-storey windows to avoid my toddler self’s insistent demands to “read me a story”. I suspect I wasn’t actually precociously bright, but just very good at memorising the words and the timing of the page turns. In any case, no one thought to check this by making me read them a new book until I’d worked out which shapes were which words. The rest is history. Quite literally - I’m currently supporting my part-time Phd habit in that subject by working in a tech-type job during the day.
I’d been dimly aware of romance novels from 10 or 11, but only started to read them at around 13, when my parents’ marriage hit the rockier parts of its downhill spiral into oblivion. For me, the initial attraction of romance novels (besides the fact that they wrote about IT and although I knew how IT worked, I was very curious about why anyone in their right mind would want to actually do IT…) was the way they dealt with serious relationship problems and worked their way through to a HEA. At 13, I still hoped to find the magic solution to the stuff going on around me, and in any case, the non-fiction on the subject that I read inconveniently required the cooperation of at least one of the participants.
Unfortunately, convincing my father to change career to mysterious tycoon was as unlikely as my mother retraining to become a lady pirate. And the whole secret baby/virgin thing was a huge challenge. So after a few failed attempts to trap my parents in enclosed spaces under threat of imminent danger, (the plans suffered because of my extreme reluctance to contemplate anything that might require them to remove their clothes) I gave up on the idea of engineering a HEA or even a reprieve. But I continued to read romances for the exploration of relationships and the hope they offer. I’ve never wanted to marry or have kids, but I sort of see the struggle/HEA of a romance as a kind of metaphor. They’re cathartic.
I also like romances (and still do) because they’re mainly written by women from a female perspective. Even in the most exuberantly bodice-ripping 1970s’ boinktacular, a woman wins in the end, although I might debate the how and why and her alpha prize is one I’d be more likely to push off his yacht.
I get a lot of flack for reading romances - way more than for any of the other genre books I read. I’d consider myself more of an aspiring smart bitch than an actual one (no idea of IQ, but I hope it’s bigger than my bust size as I’m a B cup) but my thick glasses and ability to use big words fooled a fairly snooty university into letting me in. I stayed, they gave me a couple of sets of letters, then I went to another place for a couple more.
Consequently, some of my kinder critics ask why I “waste my mind on that crap”. Perhaps if all other pastimes only stimulated the intellect and appealed to aesthetic sensibilities, I’d buy that more. I have been known to flash a Fabio cover to provoke these types. Besides, no one’s ever managed to convince me of the view that intellectual and aesthetic pleasures are superior to emotional ones. Of course, there are extremely well-written romances that are all these things, but they don’t have to necessarily engage on all these levels for me to enjoy them. *shrug*
I like this site because there’s room for it all here. It’s one of the few places which debates the sometimes uncomfortable questions raised by the genre or a really good book as well as pokes fun at the sillier side. It’s good to do this with people who know that enjoying a bit of high camp froth from Dara Joy doesn’t automatically make me either a brain-dead idiot or a traitor to my gender.
EvilAuntiePeril said on 11.27.06 at 03:17 PM • [link]
And hey, bam? You know what paradise is?
It’s a lie *sob*, a fantasy we create about people and places as we’d like them to be.
But you know what truth is? *emotion swells*
It’s that little baby you’re holding *sob*, it’s that maaan you fought with this morning *sob*
The saaayume one you’re going to make love with tonight.
That’s truth *sob*, that’s luurrve.
You may have ruined my weekend by sticking the lines about “subtle whoring” and being “bitter from the sweet” in my head.
bam said on 11.27.06 at 07:29 PM • [link]
My divine pleasure, EVP.
Oh, and I took an IQ test this morning on the Globo-net and as it turns out, I have the IQ of a headless Barbie doll.
Huh. That’s depressing.
Gail Dayton said on 11.27.06 at 08:49 PM • [link]
Wow! I do think this is an a-typical bunch of romance readers to a small extent, but what fun to read about all of you.
Okay, my turn.
I’m a 52-year-old female (though I’ve had to ask the fella—who’s a whole week older—“how old are we again?” recently). I’m white, of the British/Irish/German variety (the Irish great-granddad married a vaguely German girl (family in the US since the 1600s) but everybody else came from that other island—got the Shannon-Morgan coloring tho—very dark hair going gray disgustingly early, pale, pale skin and two-toned eyes) but my culture/ethnicity is actually Texan. (It is my belief that one’s ethnicity can be discerned by the food they eat on which holidays—therefore I am ethnically a Texan because I do tamales on Christmas Eve and black-eyed peas on New Year’s.)
As for religion, I am a semi-foul- mouthed pro-choice fag-lovin’ evolutionist Baptist Sunday School teacher who also reads Tarot. (Those Southern Baptists have left the traditional “make up your own mind about peripheral stuff” beliefs way, way WAY behind…)And yeah, I still wrote what I wrote in the Rose books. I’m not your usual Baptist, to say the least.
Let’s see—education. I have an Honors BA in journalism and a Master’s in history (won the fellowship for my year). I’m currently writing full time, but have in the past worked as the entire editorial department of various small-town weekly papers, taught junior college history and government and worked as the chief clerk and paralegal in a rural Texas prosecutor’s office. (We handled the stupid, not the wicked, since our office did only misdemeanors and juvniles.)
Um, I’m straight, but open-minded. Yeah, women are pretty, but I’m just not attracted. I like men. All shapes, colors, and sizes in all their peculiarities. Being a Texas woman, I insist that they live up to my standards of behavior, or else. Though I’ve been married for 30 years to a fabulous guy who still pushes my buttons. Yeah, sometimes I want to brain him, but love isn’t for sissies.
Which is why I read romances. I really didn’t get deeply into them, although I’ve always loved romantic stories, until I was in my 20s. I had sent a book to an agent who responded that it felt a lot like a historical romance. So I went out and read 50 or so and fell in love with the genre. (I Glommed Roberta Gellis who had the combination of good history and great romance I loved.) Before that, I was more of a science fiction/fantasy reader. Especially the ones with strong romantic subplots.
It’s the emotional depth I want, and that I get out of romance. The sex is a plus, but it’s really the emotion I read for, and the other genres don’t give me the gamut of emotion you get in romance. They tend to avoid the “sissy” emotions. And sex. (Which to me was always silly, especially in the fantasies. I mean, come on—you have men and women off on a quest that lasts for months and months, and NOBODY even THINKS about sex? Talk about Unrealistic!!!)
Okay, nuff about me. This is fun!
gigi said on 11.27.06 at 11:53 PM • [link]
Wow, are you actually taking data on this, Candy? I hope someone is. It could become a survey that gets quoted everywhere. We could be bias-busters.
My contribution:
Age: “Hurrah, at last I’m forty!”
Ethnicity: Dad’s family a bunch of Mayflower New Englanders; Mom born in France with exotic Euro-Sephardic background.
Intellectual: Two M.A. degrees, IQ 165 a long time ago (may have slipped considerably since then), never finished my Ph.D. dissertation (see what I mean?).
Religious: I try to follow the teachings of Christ and have studied the way of Zen and the teachings of Shakyamuni Buddha, practice daily 2 martial arts and try to follow these teachings also in my life.
Gender/Orientation: I’m surrounded by wonderful female friends who give me constant warmth, love and joy, but when it comes to sex, I dig guys. Oh, yes. I dig guys. With the puzzling exception of my ex-husband, the feeling seems to be mutual so far.
Why I read Romance: The focus on the quest for happiness and fulfillment that encompasses the Other and not only the Self. Oh, yeah, and I love having my emotions engaged with care and respect, which the romance genre in general seems to do very well—I hate reading a book that makes me feel manipulated and used, with my reactions being calculated clinically as if the book were a drug trial instead of an experience.
Did I hit all the necessary points? Hope so!
Trix said on 11.28.06 at 02:41 AM • [link]
I’m a 38 year old pakeha (white) New Zealander currently living in Australia (not forever, this ain’t my place). I spent 5 years in London.
I work in IT, have an above-average IQ, read mainly SF/fantasy, and the occasional detective story.
I’m a lesbian, and polyamorous, and have two girlfriends who are of the femme side of the spectrum. I consider myself to be more butch than not (but I’m hardly a diesel-dyke). I do bonk the occasional guy (once every 5 years? keeping my hand in, heh).
With romances, they’re something I pick up once in a while, because my protagonist-requirements are a bit stringent. I like feisty chicks (similar to RL!) who don’t “submit” to the “strong” male. My preferred male characters are in the Darcy line. Rochester will do in a pinch, but Heathcliff gives me the squicks.
I enjoy Austen, and quite a number of Heyers. I haven’t read enough modern authors to give my preferences, although I looove Bujold, if we want to talk SF/fantasy crossover.
I like reading books that have a happy ending - really, we have enough crap to deal with in RL. I like character development. I do like some historical fiction. Good romances are a good fit for a lot of that.
Trix said on 11.28.06 at 02:50 AM • [link]
Oh, and I forgot to say that I’m a big-old political leftie, so something that’s a little too much “lords and ladies” makes me yawn (although I certainly make exceptions), and I consider myself to be a pantheist religiously (or agnostic for short!)
And I also like (certain) romances because they don’t leave out the nookie!
Candy said on 11.28.06 at 02:58 AM • [link]
This is fantastic. It’s especially interesting to find out particulars about some of our regular commenters, like EvilAuntiePeril.
I’ll try and compile basic demographic data in a few days and see what the numbers spit out in our Gloriously Glorious Unscientific Romance Reader Survey of 2006.
Vash said on 11.28.06 at 04:54 AM • [link]
Am 23 and am engaged to an annoyingly lovable alpha male. No idea how it happened, but we met the first week at University, became friends, fell in love, and have been happily boinking ever since. Racially, I am about as WASPy as you can get. I wish I could have some cool ethnicity, but, as my sexy Italian-Bohemian fiancée says, I am just his “Hot Puritain Protestant Whore.â€
I got my BS in Molecular Genetics at a top-tier university with a minor in English Lit. Worked in hardcore science for a year, and am published in science journals. Currently, I am in medical school kicking my anatomy class’s ass. As for intelligence, I think I am above average, but I am woefully aware of my own ignorance. However, am very proud that I scored in the 95th percentile on the MCAT, the bitch of all standardized exams. So I must be pretty smart.
I have always been a voracious reader for as long as I can remember. I will read almost anything as long as it is well written, but I reserve the right to have my own personal taste. I came to romance novels when I got bored one day when I was 14 and couldn’t walk to the library to check out my usual fantasy novels. I picked up my mom’s copy of “The Flame and the Flower†and haven’t looked back since.
Recently, I have had to defend my love of romance novels to my fiancee’s brothers, who have taken to teasing me for getting their little sister hooked on romance novels to the point of being anti-social.
Romance novels are just plain fun. Do I need to defend my need to ride a roller coaster? No. Do I need to defend my liking of ice cream or other comfort foods? No. It’s just silly that I need to try to defend my pleasure reading! When I need a break from the dry, dry world of science and nothing will take it form me.
I hover somewhere between cynical and smooshy, because while I know there are harsh realities in the world and endless suffering, I also know that love and compassion exists because I have seen and experienced it.
Oh, and I also devour fanfiction in my spare time. Try explaining THAT to people… it’s even worse than the romance novel reaction, trust me.
Caryle said on 11.28.06 at 08:05 AM • [link]
gender: female
age: 31
race: Caucasian
national origin: Irish/Scotish/English/German American
where I’ve lived: Midwest (Illinois, Kansas, and Iowa)
religion: non-church going Christian, but I do believe in the reality of things that are “other” (tarot, ghosts, etc.)
occupation: I hate math and word problems, so of course I work in the financial industry
education level: MBA
sexual orientation: Solidly attracted to men, especially ones with broad shoulders :)
Why I read romance: I don’t have a very solid answer for this. I’ve always read. My mom was an elementary school librarian and my dad always had at least one book he was reading. Having my nose buried in a book was as natural as breathing. I’ve always gravitated to stories that took me away from the “normal” world. Fantasy was always so much more interesting. Plus, it always seemed like more of a challenge to create a whole world from scratch. As reality persisted in making itself known, I found books became an escape from my troubles, and books with a HEA were especially appealing. In high school a friend brought a Johanna Lindsey over to my house. We read the first few chapters aloud, giggling the entire time about how awful it was, but we kept reading and then we both read another one, and another, and I was hooked.
I can say with no reservations that I have met more fabulous and intelligent women that read romance than in any other arena, including the academic world. Sometimes I read this site and am absolutely floored at intelligence and thought process behind the entries and comments. So, thanks everyone for being fantastic, you’re the reason I come back every day.
isi.2 said on 11.28.06 at 10:15 AM • [link]
I don’t post here much, but I’m a female, 24 year old, gay, white, American, non-lapsed Catholic, grad student. The gay Catholic thing is lots of fun; most of my friends are atheists. They also tend to be more cynical than me—I think that reconciling the contradictions of liberalism with pretty traditional Catholicism requires a bit of optimism. Or insanity.
While I love this site, I haven’t read much romance and haven’t been all that crazy about what I have (at least those books specifically marketed as romance). Maybe some of you gay/bi readers could recommend some decent, preferably f/f romance to win me over? Or maybe Candy & Sarah could compile a list of good lesbian romance? By good I guess I mean something on the more character-driven end of things. Emma Donoghue’s Stir-fry is definitely good, although it probably wouldn’t be found in the romance section.
And despite both my (pretty brilliant) mother and (equally brilliant, cynical, atheist) best friend unabashedly reading romance, I’m one of those evil people who instinctively looks down on it. Mostly I think it’s the traditional romance covers, which are still the public face of the genre. And they’re not only garish, but, being a dyke, the preponderance of half-naked, overly oiled, overly mullet-ed guys and swooning waifs never struck me as remotely inviting. Then there’s the reuse of cover models, which suggest that those books’ characters are interchangeable, and which is distinctly offputting to someone who needs to empathize with characters who are fully developed individuals to get into a book solely devoted to their relationship. I don’t know. I like reading about what makes people tick, so I should like (and want to like) romance. I just haven’t found the book to win me over to it yet, and those cringeworthy covers just reinforce all of my negative pre-impressions.
runswithscissors said on 11.28.06 at 12:49 PM • [link]
Coming to this a little bit late, but dammit, work kept getting in the way.
27 year old white female, from Ireland, which means that the sun is not my friend – I don’t tan, I just melt. At the tender age of 18 I decided to head off into the world in search of Adventure and Romance. Seriously. I had a very romantic nature. Still do deep down, but it’s camouflaged beneath several layers, some pointy, don’t-mess-with-me shoes and a heavy dose of sarcasm. The quest for A&R brought me to various parts of the world, most recently London.
I’m Christian – place/type of worship depending on mood. I am a relatively rare breed, an Irish protestant ... but I went to a convent school so I speak nun.
I’m straight but with a side of ‘never say never’.
I have a BA in History and English as well as an MA and I research and write exhibitions. I have no idea what my IQ is ... I was briefly, aged 12, in a programme for gifted children, but then I decided it wasn’t for me. Which led to an angry phone call from the director telling my mother that she was stifling my potential. I’ve managed.
And why do I read romance? To answer this question I dug out my copy of Francis Spofford’s The Child that Books Built which I recommend to each and every Smart Bitch. Spofford, like much of the Bitchery, was an avid reader from a very early age and The Child that Books Built is a kind of biography in books, from the picture books Spofford read aged 3, to his discovery of Sci Fi as a teen. More than that, he looks into the ways the books we choose to read as we develop affect our adult worldview. In the section entitled ‘The Hole’ Spofford describes what he sees as the difference between those who were bookworms from an early age and people who started to read as teenagers.
For them, books lack the primary association with comfort that is laid down by childhood reading, and which persists at some deep level even in the psyche of those who never looked back once they had left Swallows and Amazons and My Friend Flicka behind ... they developed almost no appetite, necessarily, for story as such. They tend not to look to fiction for veins of organised pleasure which satisfy because of their difference from experienced reality. You can spot these people when you go on holiday with them. They are the ones who feel no pull towards the thrillers in the airport bookshop, because they have packed a book of chess problems, some Lacan essays, and Dombey & Son, which they plan to read for the fourth time.
This is absolutely why I read romance: it satisfies my appetite for story. It’s not the only thing I read, and I’ve read very widely, but it is, without question and for a whole host of reasons (including the comfort of the happy ending) my ‘vein of organised pleasure’ (best euphemism for male genitalia ever?). And my (tenuous I admit) theory is that far from being the preserve of people who like short books with easy words, romance attracts people who devour books, who need books, who get shaky if they don’t know where their next book is coming from.
llyfreneth said on 11.28.06 at 08:46 PM • [link]
De-lurking and jumping in at the end, but I just got time to catch up on what I’ve missed!
Gender: female
Age: 24
National origin: Irish/German/French/Scots/Welsh/English (general American mutt, in other words)
Education: BA in Anthro and Linguistics, MLIS with a specialization in Youth Services
Where I’ve lived: Grew up in Connecticut (the crappy part,) moved to PA after graduating high school, spent 4 years in Pittsburgh and one in England, and now I’m in Rhode Island.
Religion: seriously lapsed Catholic edging over into Celtic Reconstructionism
Sexual Orientation: Femme lesbian
Occupation: Chiildren’s Librarian
I came to romance novels kind of late in life. I was in library school (so, 22/23) before I ever picked one up. Granted, I read and loved Sayer’s Gaudy Night (and all the Wimsey stuff in general) when I was 12, but I didn’t get into romance until I was older. I still have to justify reading romance to my family since they think it signifies that I’m kind of fluffy of brain. As I’m definitely not fluffy of brain, I read what I like and ignore the comments :).
I read romance because it does satisfy a lot of the squishy emotional stuff that say, War and Peace, doesn’t. Some challenge me, some make me cry, and a lot are like curling up in front of a fire with a good friend. I know that no matter how crummy things may get, there’s at least the beginning of happiness for the main characters by the end. Oh, and I also get to learn stuff! I love it when I need to go look something up because I’ve come across a word or phrase or description that I didn’t quite get! Yeah, I’m a librarian, we get excited about research ;)!
shaunee said on 11.28.06 at 09:49 PM • [link]
Age: technically, 36 but I was recently carded at the wine store so I’m going to go with 21.
Race: black chick of Jamaican descent. Parents were born in the late 1930s and remember buying bread for 3 pence or some such and waving as The Queen paraded down some main street in Kingston, so I guess I skew slightly English-like.
Religion: well, I suppose I’m Episcopalian, but the only church I ever go to with any sort of regularity is an empty one. I like Episcopalian churches because the scent of Frankincense lingers a bit and is pleasant. I do a bit of thinking, come up with possible solutions to problems, maybe write a few things down, then leave.
Sexual orientation: I dig men. But when it comes to who you want to love, I say just do the damn thing.
Education: snooty private school, snooty boarding school, snooty private college and an M.F.A. from American University. I mention the last because it’s the only bit of learning I chose all on my own. Strangely enough the M.F.A is the only existing evidence that says I actually can get an A. Many of them. An entire degree made up only of them, I’m not ashamed to say. Before that my educational assertiveness can be likened to the remote control being on the coffee table, maybe 3 feet away from you hand, yet you can’t be bothered to stretch and get it, but wait—watching something moronic—until someone walks by close enough to hand it to you. So I guess I’m only recently smart.
Books: the absolute love of my life since forever. I have clear memories of being a 2nd grader hiding in my closet with a flashlight at 3 in the morning finishing “Flowers for Algernon.” Romance novels were introduced to me in middle school by Kristin DePonte, who chastised me for not shaving my legs. Jennifer Blake. Looking back…good God. Jennifer Blake? But I was hooked, first for the sex, but then I just got caught up in the story. Naturally I had to hide them from my parents who made even the handling of such things sound like I was walking around with a test tube filled with E Coli in my hands. I could love books, just not those. Whatever. I loved them; I was just furtive about it. Have become more and more unfurtive as the years progress. Now, my routine at the bookstore is to head first for romance, then sci-fi then what all else takes my fancy.
I love the contrariness of finding love or sex and I can’t get enough of the seeing the human imagination at work. Romance fills the bill nicely.
Darlene Marshall said on 11.28.06 at 09:58 PM • [link]
The more I read these replies the more impressed I am, and the more I realize this site fully lives up to its billing.
We are smart bitches who love trashy novels. And we are everywhere. Take that, elitist book snobs!
RandomRanter said on 11.28.06 at 10:58 PM • [link]
Female, 33, Multiracial (Irish, English, Hawaiian, Chinese, and German), Born in and live again in DC (so provincial of me), Unitarian Universalist by choice (I was raised nothing), work in benefits, have a MA from the UK, straight.
I have been reading forever - anything I can get my hands on. I read street signs aloud as a child so taking me to the library was in part a defense mechanism on the part of my mother. I tend towards romance/romantic supsense/paranormal romance for a bunch of reasons. I enjoy the stories, I like stories about people even if the mystery or whatever is a mechanism to help us get to know the people. I like HEAs, and while they are not required, I do occaisionally need a story where I know something will work out well.
Lindsay Hayes said on 11.29.06 at 09:41 AM • [link]
I am as white as a person can get (English, Irish, Scot, Swiss, German descent-a white mutt basically). I’m a straight 25 year old who recently married her high school sweetheart. I’m from Oklahoma and still live there, although I strongly suspect that my current job hunt will alter that soon. I am an only child born to two public school teachers who are still married. I have a B.A. in English lit and an M.A. in Communication. I’m pretty damn liberal in basically all my views. Pro-choice, pro-environment, pro-working class. I’m somewhere between agnostic and Christian in regard to religion.
I have always enjoyed love stories in all forms. I tend to favor historicals in this genre as well as others. Big, historical epic movies are my favorite. I enjoyed reading as a child and teenager but it wasn’t until I discovered romance in my first semester that I started reading like a madwoman. I also studied romance novels and the people who read them during my graduate career. That’s right, romance novels were my homework and it was fucking great!
I think that covers it.
azteclady said on 11.30.06 at 12:52 AM • [link]
Female, soon to turn 41, divorced mother of two. Born Mexican of parents with Mixteca, Spanish, French and Catalan heritage, I have been told often that I don’t look nor sound Latina (probably because I’ve moved around a bit in the past 20 yrs). Raised Catholic by two very devout people, I only go to church when my mother visits me—it makes her happy and doesn’t ruffle my feathers too much.
I’m intelligent enough to be in the 99 percentile in language in my SAT—taken in English 14 years after finishing HS. Yes, I’m quite proud of that. I don’t know my IQ, nor do I have a college degree, even though I’ve attended college three times, in three different countries.
Straight, not narrow. I believe that people are people and should be free to feel whatever they feel and to live it openly. “Safe, sane, consensual AND respectful” should be drilled into kids everywhere.
I cannot remember a time when I didn’t read—and I have some pretty early and quite detailed memories. My mother was a librarian for over 30 years, and my stepfather was a History teacher who co-wrote the History textbook I used in middle school—a very cool coincidence, I’ve always thought. I’m the youngest of five voracious readers, and I’m lucky enough that both my children read as much as I do.
I started reading romance in middle school. It was the Mexican version of a Harlequin (Deseo o Bianca, I’m not sure), and I have been reading them since. As so many of you have said before me, there’s incredible comfort in them—and I adore that I don’t have to sacrifice quality writing (plot, dialogue, characterization, you name it!) to escape.
And of course, there’s the sex, which can be pretty awesome when it’s well written.
dk said on 11.30.06 at 09:12 AM • [link]
very late to the party, but would love to de-lurk and join nonetheless!
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Ethnicity: South Asian Indian (dot not feather)
National Origin: USA - born and raised in Michigan, now live in Chicago
Education: BS (with honors) in Biopsychology and Cognitive Science and a Masters of Public Health in Toxicology and Reproductive and Women’s Health from UMichigan (Go Blue!) Currently a 4th year medical student hoping to do a residency in Internal Medicine and fellowhip in Infectious Disease
Religion: Hindu, but my beliefs are basically in line with Unitarian Universalists - secular, pro-choice, etc etc
Sexual Orientation: straight and single. and although I’ve never been inclined to play for the other team, I have no problem with those who choose to do so.
What kind of romance: pretty much anything except time travel and sci-fi/fantasy. I know it’s all the rage right now, but it weirds me out. I prefer Regencies and historicals, and certain contemporary authors (Roberts, Krentz, Phillips, Brockmann, Crusie)
Why romance: I taught myself to read at a very young age and basically never stopped. I also read extremely fast and exhausted the children’s section of our local library, so I went hunting for more reading material. At first I read mainly mysteries and suspense but found myself gravitating toward the books with romantic tension and HEAs. When I finally discovered pure romance - I think it was a Jude Deveraux - I never looked back. Although I read pretty much anything - biographies, scientific journals, mysteries, political science, pop culture - my true love (ha!) is romance.
I’ve been teased mercilessly for my reading habits by both family and friends, although I’ve gotten my mom to read some Nora Roberts.
As with other commenters on this site, I’ve also gotten the “why do you read such trash?” questions. People can’t seem to reconcile reading romance with intelligence. I don’t try to defend my reading habits because I think it’s next to impossible to shake people loose from their preconceived notions. And quite frankly, it’s not worth my time - I’d rather spend it lost in a good book!
issek said on 12.02.06 at 04:07 PM • [link]
Male
Age 55
White
Catholic
IT specialist for government agency
B.A. - English
Mensa member
If by “reading romance novels” you mean “exclusively,” then I don’t. I read all kinds of novels. Mystery, Historical, Science Fiction, Fantasy, Thrillers and, now, Romance. Any reading I do, even non-fiction, is at least partially a form of escapism for me. I demand good plotting, good writing, good characterization, good dialogue in whatever genre I happen to be reading and detest schlock no matter what shelf of the bookstore I find it on. I was recently introduced to Romance by one of your readers - the love of my life - whose opinion I respect, and the books she has recommended to me have been very good. She has also given me tips on who and what to avoid, and our discussions about the genre have been very enlightening. I am still trying to figure out what makes a book a “Romance,” and I haven’t seen any definition that would exclude any of the categories I already mentioned. A fantasy series I read recently, and have recommended, is absolutely fantasy, and also, absolutely romance.
Invisigoth said on 12.03.06 at 04:05 AM • [link]
Female, straight, college grad (late 80’s), look caucasian but I’m a little bit of everything, had many many different jobs (muralist, art teacher, art studio manager, convenience store manager, picture framer, car sales, office manager, temp worker).
re: intellegence—I was always in the advanced classes and in the top portion of the classes—IQ is somewhere between 140-155 (I would get bored with the tests about 2/3 of the way in and just start marking anything)and I read anything that I rest my eyes on (backs of cereal boxes, author’s notes, etc). Started reading romances when I out grew the Judy Blume young adult books at about age 12 or 13. Loved, loved, loved the historicals—-didn’t care for the contemporary romances.
Stopped reading romances for a while and then gradually came back to them. I like the escape and while I still love a good historical romance, I also enjoy over the top humorous romances (awww, come on “Corset Diaries” was a fun little romp!). I also like paranormal romances and erotic romances. I don’t care about the sexual orientation of the the story’s characters, I just like a really well written story that entertains—and hot sex scenes never hurt.
Kassiana said on 12.05.06 at 02:39 AM • [link]
gender: female
age: 33, soon to be 34
race: I don’t race. But I’m on the “burns easily” skin shade scale.
national origin: USA! USA! USA!
religion: Pagan and Unitarian Universalist.
occupation: Unhappy with my occupation at the moment
education level: J.D. degree
sexual orientation: very hetero. If I were to become male, I’d be gayer than a sunset. I don’t understand why people are sexually attracted to women. I understand that they are, and when they’re male I’m glad, but I don’t get it.
why you read romance novels: Sexual thrills, ridiculousness and humor.
sulz said on 12.05.06 at 11:05 AM • [link]
i’m 21, female, chinese malaysian, studying for a language & linguistics degree majoring in english, and i love nothing more than a good chick lit book.
the sole purpose of reading this genre is that i derive most reading pleasure from it. i relate more to it as well since i can imagine myself in the shoes of these chick lit characters. it explores issues that are close to me as a female and brings me closer to issues that does not affect me.
i admit that sometimes i’m a bit ashamed of displaying my chick lit book in public - i would turn the cover on the inside, facing my body as i stroll around with it in my hand.
but it is that same book which keeps me up until two in the morning, thinking there’s only so little pages left to go, let’s just finish this and see what happens at the end!
however, i don’t like romance. it’s too corny and melodramatic for me. there are the rare few i enjoy, such as the top-rated scarlett: the sequel to gone with the wind. my favourite chick lit books are the shopaholic series by sophie kinsella and the two bridget jones books by helen fielding. i also love jilly cooper, especially her best work, which is score!, in my opinion.
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