Bitchin' Blog Posts
: Hofftastic
June 05, 2010 | Saturday | 10 Comments
Based on this collection of linktastic fantasticness, I came up with a contest, and oh, my stars and undergarments, did you deliver. First, the honorable mentions: to the following people I extend laudatory high-fives! Kaetrin for La Douche’s Ninja Bride’s Secret Baby. Everything’s better with a secret baby. Emily for Victor Cantrell and the Dancing Ninjas. Ben P for “combining a western remake of Drunken Master with the most artistic autobiography since Being John Malkovic.” Key line: “Pattinson once again wows us with his somnambulant expressiveness.” When does he not!? and to Snidley Whiplash for Teenage Baywatch Ninja Girls. How…
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May 02, 2010 | Sunday | 18 Comments
And so is P.N. Elrod, who sent me a link, so that I could show you THIS GRAPHIC:
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April 05, 2010 | Monday | 41 Comments
I’ve spent the last three days playing with my iPad. While there are many very savvy and very insightful reviews of the device out there, this probably isn’t one of them. It’s more of a log of my experience trying the device and the things I noticed as I set it up (Oh my God the Setting Up and the Waiting for the Setting Up) and tried to read on it, and my thoughts after a few days of doing so. My apologies in advance for the length of this review, but I think it communicates a lot about a…
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October 23, 2009 | Friday | 7 Comments
More joy from my inbox. It is a very crowded place, my inbox, but I swear, thanks to you it is the best inbox in all the land. First, from Missy: proof that reading romance can make you an outstanding parental role model. A friend of mine watched The Middle the other night. He said that an 8 year old kid was reading a romance novel to his friend. He said a line something like: “‘And as the count entered the room, her bosom heaved.’ That means she threw up!” Oh, crap is THAT what’s happening in all those old…
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October 02, 2009 | Friday | 12 Comments
To Luisa go all the thanks for all the Hoff. Behold, the literal video for “Hooked on a Feeling” originally recorded by Blue Suede, then covered (badly) by The Hoffster.
True story: when Hubby and I got married, this was our “first dance” song - the real one, not the Hoff one - and then our “last dance” was our wedding song, also not by the Hoff. So I freaking love this song, even if it’s Hoff flying over a weird guy with a cube.
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April 17, 2009 | Friday | 9 Comments
Nekobawt sent the following: burlesque + Knight Rider + Hoff = WTF/WIN.
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January 04, 2009 | Sunday | 11 Comments
Lucky Megan was the Hofftastic Holiday winner, and she was so excited to receive her Hoff Bag o’ Awesome:
I had to write and say thank you again—I received my Hoff bag in the mail the other day, and you would have thought someone sent me a million dollars! In typically “me” fashion, my sister and I staged a photo shoot with all of my loot. I’m attaching my two favorite photos—plus one regular one of me in my T-shirt, so you know I’m not a total lunatic
Photo shoot? Oh hell yeah, a photo shoot.
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December 26, 2008 | Friday | 16 Comments
When Hubby and I got married, our first dance was Blue Suede’s Hooked on a Feeling. For that reason alone, this particular version makes me dance like a fool. The addition of Hoff goodness only makes it more campy, more awesome, more… surreal. What is UP with the snowboarding on a toboggan?
And why is he in a fjord?
Ah, forget it. I should not question the Hoff, nor his majesty.
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December 23, 2008 | Tuesday | 362 Comments
If you follow the site, you know that I’m Jewish and Candy is Agnostic Badass but it’s Christmas season here, there, and everywhere, and Hachette’s Forever Romance wants to make sure you have a whopping pile of books to read this holiday season. It’s still Hanukkah, it’s nearly Christmas, and there’s ample time to read, right? So let’s get going with a Holy Big Honking Ample Prize offering. Leave a comment between right this minute, describing one thing you’d really like, esoteric or literal, this holiday season, and I’ll draw one random winner from the group. Comments close at midnight…
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December 22, 2008 | Monday | 14 Comments
For y’all who are lighting candles tonight, may it be a warm and peaceful evening. Happy Hanukkah and have a kickin’ yule.
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December 12, 2008 | Friday | 17 Comments
You know, for a holiday during a repressive, recessive economy, we have some incredible gift options. From SBTB Swag to log underpants, your options are long, strong, and mighty. But really, personalization is IT. Like, your own customized, personalized David Hasselhoff poster. So, with great thanks to Harmony, I provide you with: the Hofftastic Holiday Contest. Craft your personal Hoff message where in the Hoff sends holiday Hoff greetings to the internet. Why the internet? Because the internet is the hot, teeming wellspring of his powerful celebrity. You can craft it to his HoffSpace fans, the YouTube folks who make…
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October 26, 2008 | Sunday | 4 Comments
Thank you to the many, many people who forwarded me this new game: Hassel the Hoff. As in, beat the ever living tar and shit out of him in a new video game called “PAIN.”
To the tune of the Hoff covering Culture Club’s “Do you really want to hurt me.”
It’s just a marriage of awful and awesome that brings tears of joy to my eyes. Wow.
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