Should I infict the clown cover upon you another time? Yes, I think I shall: She's got pigtails and a considering expression on her face. He's, well, if you have a clown phobia, he's the most terrifying ever. If you don't have a clown phobia, he's still kind of terrifying. So who wins the caption that cover HORROR EDITION? read more »
Oh Geez. At RT, even, people came up to tell me how funny that comment thread was. You're ridiculous good, people. Choosing a winner is seriously difficult. So, here, have a last look at Fire's Tender What Now: The Honorable Mentions go to: read more »
Jan Oda sent me this cover, and all the possible jokes ran to the front of my brain and pushed each other like the doors just opened at Target and everything was 65% off.I'm not sure if there's been a better candidate for "Caption That Cover" - well, of course there have, but not this week! I mean, from jokes about munching carpet to whether the rug matches the drapes to what REALLY goes on in NJ, there's no shortage (heh) of opportunities here. So here we go! It's Caption That Cover time! Leave your caption in the comments,… read more »
Teri S. sent me the following book cover, saying that it HAD to be an excellent book, what with the cover and the title. Now, I think that’s hilarious. Almost as hilarious as the couple embracing in the avocado field, which, according to the person who was looking for that book, features the tagline, “The avocado farm was going well, but who could have predicted Jane’s brain aneurysm?....” Wow. From One More Chance among the avocodos to A Flaunting Cactus, old-old-skool Harlequin titles are as much fun as the newer-old-skool titles they’ve recently stopped using. (NB: I was reading a… read more »
Oh, the Balloony Tunes, and your magical Duck Shack captions. Without further ado, I present the runners up and the winner of our latest Caption That Cover contest. Honorable Mentions go to: Deadline Hell: “One ‘stash to rule them all One ‘stash to find them One ‘stash to bring them all and in the mom jeans bind them In the land of the Duck Shack, where giant yellow sperm fly” Cathy: “As Nick embraced Cara, he realized that he’d forgotten to bring condoms on their weekend getaway. Good thing he was dating a woman with a balloon fetish!” Barbara: “Burt’s… read more »
You know, when I saw the Blue Flames of Naked Man Ass cover, I didn’t think anything could top it for sheer transfixing silliness. Then there was Crop Circles and the Mystery Stare. And I didn’t think that a more bizarre collection of images could be found. Then, while hunting (huh) for Duck!, one of the DABWAHA reader nominees, I found this piece of excellent: WOW. The ‘stache! The hair! The sweatshirt! The perm! THE NAME ON HER SWEATSHIRT. I love all thing Balloony. So you guessed it: time to Caption That Cover. What’s the blurb? What are they saying?… read more »
Oh, the possibilities: is he peeing? Mourning his missing manjunk? Bemoaning a pedicure gone horribly wrong? Over 200 captions later, I had a great ab workout (ow) and I have The Runners Up and The Winners for this Caption That Cover Contest. Honorable mention goes to: Tez Miller: In the immortal words of Glenn Quagmire: “Does this look like a Q to you?” Virginia E: As the four hour mark approached, he tried to stare it down, all the while cursing the lack of cell service. Sarah W: “Dowsing for the Magic Hoo-Ha with the Mighty Wang.” Kerry Allen: “For… read more »
Alert reader Heather forwarded me the following cover, and said that the minute she saw it, she thought of us. Isn’t that kind of her? Thank you, Heather! Now, everyone can say thanks to Heather because holy mother of all that is ponderous, does that image ever cry out for another round of Caption That Cover. As Heather said, “What is it with covers of guys backs with them looking down? Looks like he’s looking at his crotch. Is he getting ready to unzip and take a wiz? Honestly, that’s what it looks like. This is one time when cropping… read more »
Oh, the fun, the humor, the impossible excellence of blue flames from a naked man ass. Here are the honorable mentions in our Caption That Cover contest: Susan Reader for “Blew/Blue Halloo” Lori for “Dude, I may be your best friend, but even I’m not sniffing your ass.” queenmama for “Natural gas: clean, economical, and sexy.” hapax: “Devil with a blue ass, blue ass, blue ass Devil with a blue ass-gun!” Tamiris: “He turned away so she wouldn’t notice his blue balls, but little did he realize…” Andee: “The Mating: Skipping all that smaltzy romance crap and going straight to… read more »
Oh, that cover is so fluffy, so pretty, so… dedicated in its quest to define a Yiddish word that I love: ONGEPOTCHKET. It means, basically, “Messed up, slapped together without form, excessively and unesthetically decorated.” A restaurant that is hosed down with angels, fake snow and overdone twinkly candles? Ongepotchket. Curiously flexible humans on a bed of lavender fabricplosion? Ongepotchket! So that’s my word - but I’ve already won because I read this book and enjoyed it. So it’s time to crown the winner of the Caption That Cover contest! First: Honorable mentions go to the following find folks and… read more »
People were amazed that I didn’t have a word to say about Evangeline Collins’ cover. Of course I did. I have an entire entry’s worth of comments on that fluffy monstrosity of purple and fuchsia. But I figured it would be MUCH more fun to challenge you to Caption That Cover - so it’s fun and games and contest time! Have a long, sweeping look at this cover: Your job, should you choose to accept it, is to caption that cover Using Only One Word. I won’t even give you samples. I don’t want to take one away. Your best… read more »
Oh, the funny funny that can be inspired by the epic and frightening man titty. Behold the winner of the Nip Suck Caption Contest. Honorable Mention goes to: Linsalot for “Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world’s first bionic man. Rio will be that man; better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster and most importantly with bigger man-titty, long blue hair and a meticulously manscaped underarm” For some reason, the word “manscaped” always makes me giggle. Mari for “...In just 7 days, I can make you a maaa…nnn…” or… read more »
Kimberly sent me a link to the following cover, and I stared at it for a good ten minutes. Please, for the love of all that is holy, tell me what happened to this guy? Caption this cover! You’ve got 24 hours, and I’ve got a $25 gift certificate to the bookstore of your choice, if you can caption this cover and tell me… what went wrong, oh, so very, very wrong? Standard disclaimer: I have no idea what happened to that man. I am not being compensated for this giveaway. Please see your doctor for an erection lasting more… read more »
I received a copy of this book in the mail, and I stared at the cover for a good five minutes trying to figure out what in the name of potpourri was going on there. Take a look: First, this is one of the worst Photoshopped covers I’ve seen in forever. I can’t even find a digital image that truly showcases the hatchet and machete job of cut & paste that’s going on up in here. In the actual book cover, you can see this fugly line around the couple where they were dropped in front of the rocky background,… read more »
Time to announce the winner for our holiday Caption That Cover contest, which I started calling “Caption Underpants” about 3pm on Christmas Eve when I’d snorted tea up my nose about six times already. Damn, you are some funny people. What’s in your egg nog? So, first, we have the Honorable Mention entries: Shirin Dubbin for “If that’s holly I’d expect a lot more pricks.” Warren for “Yeah Craig, I’m pretty sure it’s not deck your balls with boughs of holly.” Maggie Robinson for “A Visit from St. Prickolas.” Amanda for “Now there’s some berries that are safe to eat.”… read more »
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