Bitchin' Blog Posts
Rename That Book: A Smart Bitch Contest
by SB Sarah | February 21, 2008 | Thursday at 5:10 pm | 55 CommentsBack when I reviewed Julie Cohen’s His For the Taking, also known as Driving Him Wild if you’re in the UK, I mentioned how mildly disappointed I was with the decision to re-title the US issue. Except instead of “mildly disappointed” substitute, “Pissed off and dumbfounded to the degree that there’s a head-shaped dent in my desk.”
A headstrong, tomboy character who drives a freakin’ CAB from the BRONX for Chrissakes gets it on till the break of dawn with a hot Maine park ranger and the US title is… His for the Taking?!
And don’t even get me started on the cover art. Red hot man hands with extra bonus thumb the size of a Yugo? What the almighty crap?
Can you tell it pains me that this book might get skipped over by the average buyer looking for a good category romance because the watered down submissive vanilla flavoring that is the title and cover art have so little to do with the flavorful Mexican vanilla that is the actual book? I’m a little het up, is all I’m saying.
So! Spontaneous contest! I have here a copy of the UK issue of Cohen’s book, with the much hotter and more sexy and genuine cover art.
Ya wannit? Here’s what ya gotta do: come up with a better title than His for the Taking, and post it in the comments. I’m judging because, well, I’ve been crowned Empress for the Day. Feel free to try to sway my judgment by commenting on your favorite. I’m leaving this one open until Friday at 12 noon Eastern, so bring it on. You can use common Harlequin title hook words, or you can go buck wild and pay homage to that freakish red thumb on the US cover.
Filed: Go Ahead, Win Some Shit
darlynne said on 02.21.08 at 05:42 PM
Taxi to His Heart
The Ride of His Life
Fare to Love
Take Me There
Get Your Thumb Out of My Eye or I’ll Kick You to the Curb
Sorry, book titles, not country western songs.
Kristen said on 02.21.08 at 05:50 PM
Thumbs Up For Love
I Break For Love
Junk In The Trunk
Under Her Thumb
She Drives A Hard Bargain
Driven To Distraction
Thumbin’ A Ride
One For The Road
Park This
snarkhunter said on 02.21.08 at 05:51 PM
Taking Him for a Ride
Driving Passion
snarkhunter said on 02.21.08 at 05:54 PM
Oh, and b/c I’m total dork for puns…
Park and Ride?
lizzy said on 02.21.08 at 05:56 PM
I read this book, and thought it was good fun. I’ll pass on the contest since I already own it, but I can’t resist submitting a title. Harlequin, obviously.
“The cab driving aerobic instructor’s random and irresistible pigeon-rescuing houseguest”
E.D'Trix said on 02.21.08 at 05:58 PM
Caught Red-handed
Time’s Torrid Taxi
Thumbbody Loves Me
Eunice said on 02.21.08 at 06:00 PM
The Meter’s Running
The Ranger’s Secret Cabbie
A Sore Savage Thumb
(Okay they’re bad, but for a free book it’s worth trying right?)
Eeyore9990 said on 02.21.08 at 06:12 PM
Oh! Oh! I know!
“Get In My Cab (And By That I Mean ‘Screw Me Silly, Mr Park Ranger!)”
darlynne said on 02.21.08 at 06:13 PM
Hailing Love
Bronx Cab Cheer
Metered Man
This is always so much fun and a slippery slope into title awfulness. Once started, it’s very difficult to stop.
DianeH said on 02.21.08 at 06:29 PM
Law and Order Meets the Cabbie
Love and the Single Cabbie
City of Love (this one is so generic, it just might work!)
* The Urban Jungle (This one might just have that “I’ve gotta get this through both Marketing and Legal” appeal.)
The Heart of the Bronx
Wooo-HOO!
Castiron said on 02.21.08 at 06:59 PM
Her Wild Ride
His for the Fare (Plus Tip)
Enticed by the Ranger (Who’s Still Not King) [with apologies to Cassie Claire]
Taken for a Ride
Love in a Taxi
(And now I’ve got “She Drives Me Crazy”, Kermit the Frog cover version, going through my head. Sigh.)
(wanted17—yeah, 17 hot park rangers bearing massage oil could go over well right now….)
Rachel said on 02.21.08 at 07:25 PM
Song-inspired ones:
Love Cab for Cutie
Baby, You Can Drive My Car (beep beep, beep beep, yeah!)
rebyj said on 02.21.08 at 07:34 PM
Sit And Spin
Smell My Finger
Manicure My Love
Invisigoth said on 02.21.08 at 07:40 PM
Pigeons for Ferrets
The Cabbie’s Park Ranger
The Cabbie, her Park Ranger and his Rescued Pigeon
Bronx Cheer
Silver James said on 02.21.08 at 07:59 PM
Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Wild
Taxicab Confessions
And if I have to vote for someone else’s title, snarkhunter’s “Park and Ride” gets my vote. It made me snort coffee.
Michelle said on 02.21.08 at 08:15 PM
Taking Him for A Test Drive Down the Highway of Love.
Sorry couldn’t resist
Freezair said on 02.21.08 at 08:23 PM
Ours for the Snarking?
Sorry. Too early in the morning. I got nothin’ yet.
Aimee said on 02.21.08 at 08:39 PM
Her Maine Event
A Fare to Remember
She Wore a Yellow Cab (the image is kind of upsetting)
Elyssa said on 02.21.08 at 08:46 PM
A Tip for Love
Revvin’ Him Up
The Park Ranger’s Secret Lover
Highway to Heaven
Highway to Bliss
Highway to Desire
Red Means Stop, Green Means Oh Yes
Breaking for Business
Backseat Lovin’
rebyj said on 02.21.08 at 08:47 PM
Aimee’s “A Fare to Remember” gets my vote! LOL
RStewie said on 02.21.08 at 09:24 PM
Thanks for the Ride
The Ride of His Life
Taming the Bonx Cabbie
Hot Cabbie Love
Escapades of a Cabbie
Under His Thumb
pick me pick me!!
Cat Marsters said on 02.21.08 at 09:25 PM
Ride Me, Ranger
I’m Mainey, Ride Me
(Okay, 10cc style pun there not working so well)
Or, if we’re looking for Harlequin Tombola-style titles…I got nothin’. No babies, mistresses, marriages, tycoons, millionaires… Bedded By The Bronx Babe is the best I can do!
RStewie said on 02.21.08 at 09:26 PM
oh, my bad! w/d The Ride of His Life!
ha! Easy67…why not hard69??
Krystn said on 02.21.08 at 09:26 PM
All’s Fare in Love and War
My Fare Cabby
Away in a Ranger
The Maine Event
north12
AnimeJune said on 02.21.08 at 09:28 PM
All’s Fare In Love and War
That’s all I got.
Maggie Robinson said on 02.21.08 at 09:34 PM
Her Maine Squeeze
Her Maine Man
Pink Cadillac (the mountain at Acadia Nat’l Park in Maine—-oh, nevermind)
Uptown Girl, Downhome Boy
Maniacs Do It Better
The Long Ranger
(and I live in Maine, which says it’s Vacationland on my car plates)
Eirin said on 02.21.08 at 09:37 PM
I’m rooting for Kristen’s (post 06:50 AM) “Thumbin’ A Ride”
Has it all, that title does ;>
Marcia in OK said on 02.21.08 at 10:10 PM
The Meter’s Running
Ziggy said on 02.21.08 at 10:28 PM
Lizzy’s contribution - “The cab driving aerobic instructor’s random and irresistible pigeon-rescuing houseguest†- makes me want to read this book RIGHT NOW.
LadyRhian said on 02.21.08 at 10:35 PM
“Get Out of My Cab (Get into my Bed)”
“Free Ride”
“Sex Cab”
“The Brooklynite Cabbie’s Hot Maine Ranger Lover”
“Playing Fare”
“Shocks and Ahhh!”
Yvonne said on 02.21.08 at 10:50 PM
Hey Maggie, shouldn’t it be
‘Uptown Girl, Downeast Boy’
and talking about Maine:
‘Bangor Boy’
and Krystn, it should be
‘Away ON a Ranger’
Heh, thats funny.
I liked Rachel’s contribution:
‘Baby, You Can Drive My Car’ (beep beep, beep beep, yeah!)
Wry Hag said on 02.21.08 at 10:58 PM
Front-Seatin’ It
Ploot, Sweat and Smegma
Is That My Thumb Up Your Ass?
Pigeon Hole
Ranger Randy’s Really Rambunctious Ride
Anita Blake’s Day Job
Rode Hard and Put Away Smelling Like Whore-Skirt Vinyl
Heidi said on 02.21.08 at 11:04 PM
Shouldn’t it be
Caught Red-thumbed?
ED’Trix?
How About
He’s Got a Ticket to Ride?
or has someone else already got that one? I can’t remember, brain freeze
And why is there a pigeon mixed up in all of this? (am afraid to ask)
Ahem said on 02.21.08 at 11:24 PM
“A Fare to Remember” has my vote.
Wry Hag said on 02.21.08 at 11:30 PM
Thumbday We’ll Be Together
Baby, You Can Ride My Thumb
Pigeon Ho’
(I ain’t finished ‘til somebody slaps me!)
megalith said on 02.21.08 at 11:33 PM
Cabbie vs. Ranger: LoveMatch
Andrea said on 02.21.08 at 11:44 PM
Driving Stick :)
muguet said on 02.21.08 at 11:58 PM
Hers for the Fucking.
(There. Turning the tables on the US publishers’ idea.)
megalith said on 02.22.08 at 12:02 AM
Crouching Pigeon, Hidden Lobster?
(Hey, it’s better than Crouching Cabbie, Hidden Salami, which is what first came to mind!)
Angelina said on 02.22.08 at 12:46 AM
How about
Taxi Driver 2: This time the cabbie rides you
Put it in my trunk… your luggage, dumbass!
Let me rotate your tires oh cabbie of my dreams!
The Vintage Reader said on 02.22.08 at 12:48 AM
Aimee gets my vote (yeah, I know, I don’t actually HAVE a vote, since I’m not Empress for the Day) for “A Fare to Remember.”
theladyferris said on 02.22.08 at 12:49 AM
This Cab Ain’t Big Enough For The Two Of Us And Your Unnaturally Large Biceps
Nessa said on 02.22.08 at 12:54 AM
Driven to Love
My Other Vanilla Lingerie Is In The Trunk
The Key To His Heart: Locked in the glovebox
Okay, these may not all be perfectly serious, but at least it’s not laden with those gross overtones. Seriously, ‘His For the Taking’?
Poison Ivy said on 02.22.08 at 01:05 AM
Okay, this one’s a classic that I am shocked no else posted yet:
Love for Hire
Josie said on 02.22.08 at 01:06 AM
I’ll add ‘The Park Ranger’s Taxi Driver Lover’. Yeah, it’s pretty ordinary!
Personally I’d like to see anything by WryHag win…
‘Rode Hard and Put Away Smelling Like Whore-Skirt Vinyl’
Brilliant. And far less offensive than ‘His for the Taking’ ;-)
SonomaLass said on 02.22.08 at 01:44 AM
Endorsing ideas that others posted first:
A Fare to Remember
and
Thumbin’ a Ride
Shiin said on 02.22.08 at 03:05 AM
I’m loving ‘A Fare to Remember.’
Kris said on 02.22.08 at 03:35 AM
His Wild Ride
One Hot Ride
(Man)Hands Off
RandomRanter said on 02.22.08 at 04:41 AM
That’s Mr. Crazy to You
Making Him a Crazy Man
One Hot Taxi Ride
Although I must say, I am adoring “Fare to Remember” and “The cab driving aerobic instructor’s random and irresistible pigeon-rescuing houseguestâ€
Danni said on 02.22.08 at 04:41 AM
i’m thinking that “A Ride To Remember” would be a more fitting title for this story.
smartmensab-tch said on 02.22.08 at 05:51 AM
I vote for “Thumbody loves me.” I don’t know why, but this seems uproariously funny to my severely sleep-deprived brain (due to insomnia, AKA My Personal Hell.)
charity said on 02.22.08 at 07:39 AM
My vote is for:
Is That My Thumb Up Your Ass?
I almost choked on my banana. - I meant that literally but what a great title for an auto-erotic novel.
talpianna said on 02.22.08 at 10:44 AM
I’m really torn between A FARE TO REMEMBER and THE RIDE OF HIS LIFE, both of which are not only clever but would actually help sell the book.
gin said on 02.22.08 at 04:58 PM
The Pigeon Fancier’s Independent Cab Driver Who Doesn’t Want To Be Anyone’s Anything Thank You Very Much
The Thumbstruck Park Ranger
Thumb Enchanted Evening
Hey, You, Get Outa My Cab
Lorelie said on 02.22.08 at 06:08 PM
My vote’s tied between “Park and Ride” and “A Fare to Remember.”
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