Smart Bitches, Trashy Books

Man Titty Contest / Vote for your favorite haiku/ oh, literate tit!

by SB Sarah | June 19, 2005 | Sunday at 7:38 pm | 0 Comments

We are so blessed in the abundance of man-titty, and of man-titty haiku!

Here’s the voting rules: email .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) or .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) your vote by Tuesday, June 21.

When you vote, tell us the name of the haiku author, plus the number of the haiku you are voting for. Many authors submitted multiple haikus so we want to make sure which literary man-titty poem you are voting for.

And without futher ado, or without any ado at all, behold: Man Titty Haiku

.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) submits:

1.
Man breast flexing so.
A nasty twitch in left one?
Nay, a cheesy wink.

2.
Teats so huge I envy
Man challenges gender gap
Victor’s Secret Bra?

3.
Half moons glistening,
Oiled to narcissistic gleam.
Yee Haw! My man boobs.

PC Cast and Kristin, her “phab daughter,” teamed up to write:

Ode to Mantittyfruit

4.
Succulent, firm flesh
Manfruit waiting to be plucked
Nipple dew…so sweet

5.
Hair on man titties?
Nay! (gasp) Abomination!
My Dear Sweet Lord – WAX.

6.
Warm, pulsing idols
Photoshop fills me with hope
Tittilicious prayers!

Alyssa writes, fearing for the addiction that is man-titty haiku:

7.
Seductive man tits
No soft gentle curves are these
How I adore you

8.
If this thought is true
More than a mouthful’s a waste
What use are his tits?

9.
Locked in an embrace
Are those titties hers or his?
Much too hard to tell.

.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) writes in response to her own personal peeve about how man nipples are always described as flat: “Like if she didnt’ write ‘male’ I’d be all confused about just whose nipples our heroine was caressing.”

10.
Man-bosom heaves - oh!
Must place my trembling lips on
Your flat male nipple.

E. D’Trix submits four masterworks of mantitty:

11.
Behold Man Titties.
Lush, bountiful and perky.
Baby Jesus weeps.

12.
Bountiful Tithood.
Suckle at my man-bosom.
Yeeeees. Fabio likes…

13.
Sweet, sweet Poser art.
Firm nipples and manly chest.
Who wants a milk shake?

14.
More than a handful
Perched, quivering on a chest
Man, he needs a bra.

Meljean provides this moist masterpiece:

15.
Giant streams erupt;
Suck white fluid from mancock—
Big nipple; no milk.

Michelle offers the following titty-trio:

16.
Fabio’s got ‘em
His cups runneth over
Hail King Pectoral!

17.
Hiding in cleavage
Behold the man-boobs abound
Bow, you drooling fool!

18.
Tight, oiled male parts
Veins bulging, hot flesh throbbing
It’s man-boobs, ya pervs!

Mollie offers:

19.
spiking man love-beads
wishing for love sustenance
alas, well is dry

20.
firm yet supple globes
proudly thrusting from six pack
hail, great man-titty!

Marie Donovan offers:

21.
Enough man-titty
To nurse a Third World Village.
Get some nipple cream!

And Jennifer Macaire proves to us that man-titty DOES have its uses:

22.
Mantitte hits the wall
with staff in full erection
Tits cushion the blow