Bitchin' Blog Posts
Lover Revealed by J.R. Ward
by SB Sarah | by SB Sarah | November 23, 2007 | Friday at 4:40 pm | 66 CommentsTitle: Lover Revealed
Author: J.R. Ward
Publication Info: Onyx March 6, 2007
ISBN: 0451412354
Genre: Paranormal
15 minute break per union regulations.
Marissa: Man, I am beat.
Butch: Me, too. This “your angst, my angst” thing is way tiring, you feel me?
Marissa: Frankly, I’m a little tired of feeling you. You’re all up my skirt with lust ahoy and then in the next chapter, if it’s not about some blonde baby powder monster man, you’re freaking out about your own worth or some shit, so you get drunk and you blow me off.
Butch: Hey, that’s how it’s written.
Marissa: I’m just saying, if I were an actual woman, I’d have kicked your ass to the curb by now with this, “I want you so much my balls are on fire but I’m not worthy of you” routine. You go get drunk off your ass and whine for awhile while I consider my perfect yet lonely life? Boring.
Butch: What can I say? I’m a sensitive man beneath a crusty exterior, both of which are intimidated by your beauty and perfection.
Marissa: Perfection? Please! I’ve never had an orgasm and don’t know what my vagina is for.
Butch: Like I said, that’s how it’s written.
John: *walks in and waves*
Butch: Time for the obligatory appearance of John?
John: *nods and walks out*
Marissa: (growling) Man, this overemphasis on purity is driving me batshit. What is it with the focus being so heavy on the men to the point that us women are merely beautiful repositories for your manful lust?
Butch: Hey, like I said….
Marissa: Yeah, that’s how it’s written. But come ON now. The women in this series are such conduits to male homosocial eroticism it’s as if they aren’t real. Eve Sedgwick would pound her head on her desk if she read these books.
Butch: Male homo-what now?
Marissa: The homoerotic triangle as described by Eve Sedgwick, in which two men use a woman as a conduit to express their homosexual desire. All the women in these books are merely homoerotic conduits instead of fully-fleshed characters.
Butch: I hate to break it to you, but you weren’t there for the other scene we shot today. You were not needed as a conduit. Trust me.
Marissa: Oh, the hell I’m not. I’m the barrier and the conduit and-
Butch: Can you stop making such weird gestures? You’re getting coffee on my suit.
John: *walks in and waves, then walks out*
Marissa: What, you’re not going to name drop your tailor?
Butch: Like I actually know who made my suit?
Marissa: While we’re on the subject, I do not get the forcible mixing of female stereotypes on top of male stereotypes - it makes for very lopsided characterization. The men are exceptionally metrosexual males with uber-violent tendencies, and the women are barely fully written.
Butch: Hey, at least all us giant well-dressed high-end-Scotch-drinking men are told around by a floating glowing chick in a cape.
Marissa: And what IS her damn problem with questioning authority? You can’t ask her a question? What the shit?
Butch: Like I said -
Marissa: Yeah, I know. You didn’t write it.
Butch: Nope.
Marissa: Let me ask you a question.
Butch: Is that allowed?
Marissa: Bite me.
Butch: *snickers*
John: *walks in and waves, bursts into silent yelling, then walks out*
Marissa: Nice show of angst, there, John.
Butch: You’d think the Brothers or someone would have a clue that that kid needs more guidance than letting him sleep in his missing adoptive father’s office chair. But no, they let him go on in his own agony and pay more attention to the labels on their shoes.
Marissa: Seriously, Butch. Let me ask you a question.
Butch: Shoot.
Marissa: Black jism? Seriously? Black jism? As a male, would you write that?
Butch: Oh, fuck no.
Marissa: I didn’t think so. There are so many potential interpretations of the symbolism of that particular scene.
Butch: Don’t go there.
Marissa: Hell, I have nothing else to do. I show up and stand around looking perfect and give you a complex every other scene. And then I get to have an orgasm but only if you can’t control your raging lust and aren’t drunk off your ass again.
Vishous: Hey, don’t even talk to me about controlling the raging lust.
Butch: Man, did you ever get the short end of the stick.
Vishous: Very funny.
Marissa: Now I’m “feeling” you. You two were more “will they or won’t they” than Butch and I, and we were setup to be together on the back cover copy, for God’s sake.
Butch: True that, true?
Vishous: Double true.
Marissa: Oh, shut up.
Butch: I gotta say, Marissa does have a point. I don’t get it - in one scene I totally get that you dig me, and I let you know that I understand, and then you get all close and I grab your ass and am freaked out by “the vibe” to the point I won’t think about it.
Vishous: I think that was meant to leave something to the reader’s imagination.
Marissa: Yeah, imagination. Imagining them tossing the book at the wall.
Vishous: I feel that.
Marissa: Oh, shut up. And take your boots off the table.
Vishous: “Shitkickers,” ma’am. They’re “shitkickers.”
Marissa: Yeah, that’s real bad ass coming from a man whose name reads way too easily as “viscous.”
Butch: Viscous? You mean like black jism?
Vishous: Shut up both of you.
Rhage: What up, yo.
Marissa: Hey there. You’re totally an accessory character in the book but you have the best line in the whole damn novel.
Rhage: What can I say? I’ve got the best extra “h” name in the book, so I get the funny funny.
Vishous: “Bus exhaust.” Now that was some funny shit right there.
Butch: Yeah. Lucky Bhastarhd.
The short review? This book went around in a damn circle sixteen times, and I finished it solely so I could find out what happened to everyone BUT the main characters. I couldn’t have given less of a shit about Butch and Marissa, and I had to wade through 300+ pages of anghsty crahp before I could find out any progression of character for John, Vishous, and the rest of them.
And also, the villain? WAY too easy to kick the shit out of the villain. They are crafty and everywhere, but it’s amazing how easily they get the can of whoopass opened on their powdery behinds, and how utterly unscary they are, because so much time is spent WITH the villains and their amazing disorganization that they seem more like pale slapstick mimes more than actual menaces. I don’t give a shit about Mr. X. He’s less malevolent and more whiny with every page. The freaking Scribe Virgin is more unsettling than the Lessers, and she’s supposedly part of the forces of good.
But what really twists my knickers is the violation of rules: spoilers ahoy, ya’ll.
So Butch is allegedly part vampire, only he never went through the change at the appropriate time. But because his father was likely or hinted to be a vampire which, according to the laws of the created universe in which this book operates, should have caused him to at least have some transitional indications but didn’t, the Brothers can still force him over to their side through a very strange ritual.What the crap was that? It’s so fudgy it’s like cheating on the rules.
And that’s how I felt after I finished the latest morsel of vampire crack: cheated. And cranky. Sorry. Crahnky. The books are still eminently readable, but the almost campy, addictive prose is less enjoyable when the story suffers through the lead characters and is only interesting due to the ancillary folks. Of course, I’m told all hell breaks loose in the end of the next one, so I have to decide whether to read it or just leave the series at this book.
Filed: Reviews, Grade D, Authors, T-Z
Ann Aguirre said on 11.23.07 at 04:53 PM • [link]
This practically mirrored my reaction as well. You said a lot of the same things I did, in fact.
Funny review.
Dobby said on 11.23.07 at 04:55 PM • [link]
If you thought this one was bad, try reading Lover Unbound. I’m sorry but spending the rest of your life with a ghost!?
I, too, am over this addiction.
Jackie L. said on 11.23.07 at 04:57 PM • [link]
The spoilers are missing! Even the extra H’s!
Sarah Frantz said on 11.23.07 at 05:14 PM • [link]
I’m sorry (you have no idea), but it’s still crack and I will still read every single word of every book Ward puts out. God help me.
And am I the only one who couldn’t give two shits about John?
Anon said on 11.23.07 at 05:33 PM • [link]
I’m so with you, Sarah. Crack up until this book; butt-crack afterwards.
These last two books suhcked.
Jennie said on 11.23.07 at 05:37 PM • [link]
I thought Lover Unbound was better than Butch’s book, mostly because I didn’t have to skim through the lesser crap like in the other books, but DH still has to fix the dent in the living toom wall from both books hitting it.
SB Sarah said on 11.23.07 at 05:48 PM • [link]
Jackie: Highlight the blank section to read the spoilers.
And yeah. I think this book and the next might be the part of the series that ascends that shark fin to take that leaping fling into the land of “not reading these anymore.”
lisabea said on 11.23.07 at 06:13 PM • [link]
I think the reason I want V and B together 4 evah is because they share all the sexy I wanna do you chemistry that never appears between M and B. What the hell is she all about anyway? Hundreds of years of being a wall ornament? Ward certainly never convinced me that Marissa was anything other than a giant, whining wuss.
Oh, the black jizz is disgusting. ew.
Still Crack, though. I’m in.
SB Sarah said on 11.23.07 at 07:34 PM • [link]
lisabea, your comment raises a curious thought. I hesitate to ever assign motivation on the part of the author when I write a review, so I don’t like to attempt to guess WHY a writer made a decision that she did, but perhaps Ward was attempting to contrast a hot, sexually charged gay “romance” with a more romance-novel-traditional “perfect woman with dangerous man” couple, such that the readership, who may or may not be accepting of a gay couple, would find themselves wishing for more of the gay romance than the heterosexual “traditional romance” couple because it was so much better than the same old same old.
Like I said, I feel really squidgy and uncomfortable assuming that I know what an author intended to do, but the contrast is thought provoking, especially considering how uber-perfect Marissa is as a character in that world.
snarkypants said on 11.23.07 at 07:49 PM • [link]
Marisa was such a freaking Mary Sue it wasn’t even funny; she had all the realistic ballsiness of a Barbara Cartland heroine, right up to her breathless speech and magical vagina.
For the first couple of books I was willing to overlook the “Alpha Male Banter”, annoying as it is, and boy, is it annoying. And, yeah, the brand dropping, Tiffany this, Armani that. Whant my mhoney bhack.
Shannon C. said on 11.23.07 at 08:05 PM • [link]
I quit reading after book 3. The crack is compelling, but these last two books… I’m not sure that I can get through them, and ‘m mainly interested in the sefcondary characters anyway. Plus, I need to see how Harry Pott—er, John—grows as a character.
Ann Bruce said on 11.23.07 at 08:10 PM • [link]
The “behind-the-scenes” scene was more entertaining than the book.
But LR didn’t cure my addiction to overgrown white boys who talk like they’re in a 50 Cent music video and are more label conscious than my gay buddies. LU did because of the world-building inconsistencies.
Kassiana said on 11.23.07 at 08:12 PM • [link]
Hm. I must be the only person in Romancelandia who liked this book and didn’t see the Vvvvvvvvvvvvv/Butch thing.
Oh, well. I’m also the only person who hates Laura Kinsale, so I should be used to this by now.
I find my word hilarious: wife27. Dude, if I’m the 27th, there’s some serious Bluebeard crap going on…
Ann Bruce said on 11.23.07 at 08:12 PM • [link]
Oh, LU also really brought home the harem-like feel of the women in the books.
PattiR said on 11.23.07 at 08:15 PM • [link]
Well, while I loved Butch’s character in the other books, I was really disappointed in his book. Marissa was so wussy and wishy-washy and not really fleshed out to me, and Butch was such a wenis when it came to her. (It was really hard (hur) reading)
She is portrayed exactly the same in this book as she was in the first. I was hoping she would become more ‘real’ to me somehow, and have an explanation of sorts as to why she is so boring, but that was not the case.
Also, the B & V storyline was not resolved to my satisfaction in this book, but it did kind of have an explanation in V’s story (not much, but they did discuss it a little bit further). I have to take what I can get, as I am not telling this story.
To touch upon the rules violation comment, well, I had a hard time with the way Ward manipulated her own rules of this vampire world she created for the sake of the story line, but hey, it is her book. I guess she can do what she likes; I don’t particularly have to agree with it though. To put this into Wardism, I was so not feeling it, true?
So, I still love Butch and still love Vishous, but if Butch called Marissa ‘Baby’ one more time, I think I would have ‘Hhurled’ and threw the book at the wall, but I will still read on.
I know we are not talking about this one yet, but with Lover Unbound (V’s Story); I kind of liked it. It was full of the background information we need to go on with the series, but it also explained why Vishous is like he is. It also shocked me to find the heroine become what she becomes at the end, but if I wanted a conventional romance, I would of picked up a Julia Quinn book (No offense, I love her too).
How believable or not is this story line, I am not sure. But count me into the group of being a ‘Ward Crahck Ahddict’. True?
Meggrs said on 11.23.07 at 08:48 PM • [link]
That’s so funny, Sarah, because it actually took me until the next book (LU) to be over it, but everyone I know has eventually hit a wall with this series, whether it’s LR or LU (depending on which characters/plot wanks seriously rubbed them the wrong way).
Me? I made it to LU, and when I finished, realized for the first time that I wasn’t “hankerin” for the next story. In a way, I’m actually grateful for Lover Unbound, because for the first time, I wasn’t all “OMG SIX MONTHS IS TOO LONG WHY CAN’T I HAVE THE NEXT ONE NOOOOOOWWWWW?!?”
Now, my reaction is a shrug. Yeah, I’ll likely keep reading, but the shine is off the apple, baby, and I couldn’t be happier. Srsly? Addiction bad, tree pretty, yanno?
Robin said on 11.23.07 at 08:51 PM • [link]
If you think there were some world building rule violations in LR, just wait until you read LU, where the whole mythology basically implodes, and not in a good way.
IMO it’s getting more and more difficult to NOT see a certain split personality in the books. I have no idea what *Ward intended* in writing them, but the way they read to me felt very, well, problematic, vis a vis widely circulated fan feedback.
And what did you think of that little female bonding moment at the end? Considering how many readers complain about the lack of female community in the series, that moment felt extremely contrived, as well as ineffective to me.
I have to say, though, I really enjoyed the Jessica Bird book, “The Billionaire Next Door.” And ironically, the book had much more of what I hoped for in the BDB series.
Robin said on 11.23.07 at 08:54 PM • [link]
Now, my reaction is a shrug. Yeah, I’ll likely keep reading, but the shine is off the apple, baby, and I couldn’t be happier. Srsly? Addiction bad, tree pretty, yanno?
But are you ready to pay those hardcover prices after Phury’s book? IIRC, Rhage’s book (IMO the most interesting of all of them now that the V/Butch pairing is off the table) will be released as hardcover.
darlynne said on 11.23.07 at 08:58 PM • [link]
As an unashamed and unrepentant lover of all of these books, I thoroughly enjoyed your review, Sarah, and even agree with much of it. I am, however, totally smitten with these guys and have said many times that I would read their books without an HEA, without the romance. The relationship or dynamic between the brothers delights me and that is enough. While I have banged my share of other books off walls—usually the ones everyone else raves about—JR Ward’s writing and characters do it for me every time. And she writes some of the best lines in any genre, Nice.Fucking.Suit being one of my favorites.
I would be interested in your reaction to Lover Unbound, primarily because so many fan girl heads exploded in outrage by the end of it. Not mine, I was just as happy as I’ve always been and actually felt LU was the best book of the series.
Grace said on 11.23.07 at 09:03 PM • [link]
Ugh. I received both these books as gifts from a sister who loves J.R. Ward. I haven’t had the courage to try and read them yet. Between the obsessive love of “Hs” in the spelling, the silly hero names, rampant Mary Sueism, magical hoo-hoos, a virtual catalogue of designer name-dropping and the heroes doing SHOTS of Lagavulin (Jaysus, folks! Lagavulin isn’t tequila. You don’t knock it back from a shot glass! The heroes deserve to die for that crime), I’ve been less than thrilled about trying these books out. Now, after reading about black jism, I think I’ll donate these books to the library. Ugh.
Why am i being insulted said on 11.23.07 at 09:04 PM • [link]
Gah! I have typed a comment, and somehow it got lost. I swear I don’t know how I do it… But I will only retype the highlights of my bitch-fest: I am bying NO MORE series, and I am soooooooo going to read comments about each and every book I buy in the times to come before I buy it. The way authors shamelessly try to make you give them money is just plain gross. (I used to think S. K. was not one of those, but the only book of hers I’ll ever buy in future is Acheron’s. After that, nada.)
darlynne said on 11.23.07 at 09:10 PM • [link]
I forgot to add: Part of what appeals to me in this series is that I don’t see anything coming. There isn’t one thing that follows all or most of the rules of romance writing or world-building, but that is exactly what works for me. To go back to one of Candy’s earlier topics, these books surprise me. I get all the arguments against them, but I love every peek into this world.
Anna said on 11.23.07 at 09:12 PM • [link]
This book (LU) smashed my addihction. The love story between B and V felt more real and more sensual than the fake love story between B and the one-dimensional, plastic Marissa. Intentional or not, it pissed me off. Are we really that homophobic? I’d have happily read a story that put V and B together in all ways.
Like any good addihct, though, I went back for more and read Lover Unbound, albeit reluctantly. I wanted to see how the V/B relationship was going to play out, more than anything. The book didn’t piss me off as much as LU, but I wasn’t satisfied by the romance between V and… well, it tells you something that I a) can’t remember her name and b) don’t want to look it up.
I hate it when a great book addichtion goes wrong. I’m an eternal optimist, though… so I’ll likely read the next one in the series, hoping to find that mysterious something that captured my interest in previous books.
Anna said on 11.23.07 at 09:17 PM • [link]
I even got the books mixed up… damn!
If my previous comment confused you, just subtitute LR anywhere I typed LU…
Jackie L. said on 11.23.07 at 10:03 PM • [link]
making voice very small: duh! Thanks SB Sarah.
Robin said on 11.23.07 at 10:24 PM • [link]
IIRC, Rhage’s book (IMO the most interesting of all of them now that the V/Butch pairing is off the table) will be released as hardcover.
Argh, for some reason I always mix up Rhage and Rhev’s names—Rhev’s story, I meant Rhev’s story. Clearly I need a dhrink.
Karla said on 11.23.07 at 10:38 PM • [link]
I actually thought this book was a step up from Lover Revealed (Zadist’s book) because it didn’t completly slaughter the previous characterization of the main character like JRW did with poor ol’ Z - he only needed the love of a good woman, really love is a substitute for all that psychosis?
Butch got a magical level up because M couldn’t go with some regular old human. Speciest isn’t it? Also B/V got turned into B/V: SoulBounded for life. O’course V’s bondage kink was a bad thing *facepalm* Why is bondage always a sign of bad/wrong/issues with more ‘mainstream’ romance?
Quiet frankly I think all the brothers and their girls need heavy duty council and psycho therapy not to mention a good sexologist to get them through their hang-ups.
Lucy said on 11.24.07 at 12:03 AM • [link]
Oh, what a good book this would have been if Ward would just allow her male characters to fuck already. True?
Lucy said on 11.24.07 at 12:05 AM • [link]
Oh and Lover Unbound has to be one of the worst books I have ever read. Enjhoy!
Maxine of Arc said on 11.24.07 at 12:34 AM • [link]
You guys are kidding me with these names, right? Right??
Shannon Stacey said on 11.24.07 at 12:36 AM • [link]
I would be interested in your reaction to Lover Unbound, primarily because so many fan girl heads exploded in outrage by the end of it. Not mine, I was just as happy as I’ve always been and actually felt LU was the best book of the series.
LU was my favorite to date, too (although I was actually hoping she would buck the system and give Butch and Vishous a Marissa-less HEA). And not only because there was no Lesser POV, although that was a biggy.
And there were some very interesting questions raised in LU, so I’m still in the “I need my fix NOW” line. :)
Victoria Dahl said on 11.24.07 at 01:03 AM • [link]
I, unfortunately, read Butch’s book FIRST, and I couldn’t stand it. And yet I went back and bought an earlier book in the series. And then another. Proof that she puts a secret ingredient in her books that make you crave them fortnightly. Or is that KFC? Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised when I found that the earlier books weren’t QUITE so focused on designer names for the heroes’ clothing. For fuck’s sake, you’re a man. You feeling me?
Anyway, I liked LU a lot, and loved, loved, loved the ending, so there.
Trollop said on 11.24.07 at 01:52 AM • [link]
Re: And am I the only one who couldn’t give two shits about John?
I skip over all the John and Mr. X, Z, Y -whatever letter bad dude has in each book. They are boring and repetitive *yawn*
B&V were the only reasons I kept on with the series but I feel like I was cheated. I really don’t understand why they couldn’t have a HEA.
That ending in LU pissed me off (a freaking *****?!?). That was the last straw for me with these books.
Chrissy said on 11.24.07 at 01:54 AM • [link]
I’ve NEVER seen the appeal. I find her books precious, self-involved, and a bit melodramatic in the bad way. They read, to me, like an overindulged child-genius wrote them and the reviews always feel like false praise from over-protective relatives.
To whit: wtf???
I prefer the newer Kathryn Smith, really. Simpler, fresh, broody without the angst, and a bit more fun. Anyone over Ward’s self-indulgent nonsense. My reaction is always disappointment with a side of get-over-yourself.
Diana Pharaoh Francis said on 11.24.07 at 02:08 AM • [link]
Snark! Lovely lovely snark! So long as such books are written as is, there is delightful snark to feed my addiction. So no matter what, I win. Good book? I win. Not so good? I get snark. See? Perfect world really.
rebyj said on 11.24.07 at 02:15 AM • [link]
I had a lot of hopes for the series. The first 3 were good except for a few quirks LU just was .........yeah. not so great..
every freakin cHaracHter in every book has the same vocabulary habit of saying ” yeah”
and ” true” in their dialouge.
If their backgrounds were identical then I could understand it but when a multi century old brother does it and a sheltered heiress does it, and a street savy cop does it, and a surgeon does it, and a reincarnated teenager does it, its not commonality its author laziness.
gawd after the 79th time I was screaming at the book lol.
I’ll read the next ones I’m sure.. i’m a sucker for predictablity and since my kids arent around that often to yell at , I quite enjoy yelling at a book!
No way I’ll pay for a hardback though. I can wait till paperback or used.
I read a ( i think) silhouette of J.R. Ward’s other name ” jessica bird” and the characters had the same annoying dialouge habits.
I hate bashing them because I did like the first couple so much but when my honey is throwing stuff at me because I’m going around saying ” true” and “yeah” for days after I read one…......yeah they deserve to be bashed a bit LOL
rebyj said on 11.24.07 at 02:23 AM • [link]
lol I said LU in my post above. It’s the freshest in my mind and most annoying like was mentioned above.. the rediculous ending. ” sigh, my only reason to exsist is to be your fuck buddy..touch me and make me real when you want me, otherwise I’ll float around in the kitchen till your manly call.”
to speak specifically about LR..
All I can add to the conversation is,I think “black jism” should be a chapter title in the bitches upcoming book.
If not, it’d make a great title for an eloras cave erotica novel!
**joanne said on 11.24.07 at 03:23 AM • [link]
Twas a loverly snarkly review!
Bravo sarah!
BUT: lol, Kassiana, you are not alone.. I not only threw Laura Kinsale (the book ‘cause she wasn’t there) at the wall, I went over, picked it up and ripped out pages… a very first for me.
AND BUT AGAIN: I read for the fiction, in this case paranormal fiction.. all the gasket blowing over V’s book is really a hoot because, what? He was suppose to end up in a regular, everyday relationship? M/M or M/F the Brother is, well, his hand sets stuff on fire… so his HEA… unless you had already written the book in your head before you read what the author wrote.
I think they’re great fun, full of imagination and sexy males and females that don’t get a lot of lines but who make their males walk the line—I love them all and Z’s book, which was Lover Awakened, was the best of the lot so far.
If J.R. Ward is doing something wrong it’s probably that she’s trying to please everyone and it doesn’t work. Sometimes the fans contribute too much and that’s when a series starts to waver… I think she’ll pick up her marbles and bring another bestseller to the table. I’ll be buying.. and for others, there’s always Laura Kinsale…
anu said on 11.24.07 at 03:57 AM • [link]
I’m trapped until Phury’s book. He and Zsadist are my favorites. I’ve got to see him through the cringeworthy story begun in LU.
denni said on 11.24.07 at 04:57 AM • [link]
Yo, I be crahnky too. And yeah, I found the supporting characters more interesting.
Lucy…true (re V & B).
Me too…no longer an ahddiction.
Chicklet said on 11.24.07 at 05:23 AM • [link]
Homophobia? (There, I said it. *g*)
Wry Hag said on 11.24.07 at 07:16 AM • [link]
Sarah, I shit you not, that’s the best, most simultaneously entertaining and enlightening review I’ve read in ages.
I’ve been doing the “Should I or shouldn’t I?” two-step with this series for a while now. I’ve read comments similar to yours before; I’ve also read the Yeah, it’s maddening crap but addictive crap comments.
I think you tipped the scales for me.
The “h” affectation would drive me batty—and already does, actually, just based on the reviews I’ve read. Any Mary Sue heroine would/does drive me batty. A storyline that backs away from a potentially complex and hot m-m relationship would drive me batty. Dialogue that includes clumsy, sore-thumb “street lingo” would drive me batty. A book larded with brand-name references, considering I’ve yet to recover from Nikes with swooshes…
Okay, you get the picture.
Ergo, why the bloody hell do I need to be battier than I already am?
Guess I’ll have to pass on JRW without even cracking a spine. Lucky me, since Christmas and birthdays are coming.
Meta Rodriguez said on 11.24.07 at 07:59 AM • [link]
THANK YOU!!
I kept hearing about this series so picked up this book to start.
I dumped it after five chapters. I don’t remember ever being this disappointed—probably because my expectations were so high.
Everything you said: boring angst masquerading as conflict, superficial characterizations and pointless dragging in of characters who brought nothing to the table. I’d read LKH Anita #57 before another of these.
P.S. This is funny. My verification is never64.
Sylvia said on 11.24.07 at 08:55 AM • [link]
I disliked LR the most I think, and I hated Marrisa… it dragged on and kind of pissed me off. But I’m sticking with the series and I enjoyed LU way more than LR.
Marrisa is and will always be a doormat in my opinion, (which gets people mad when I state it.) And Butch- I never wanted to read about him and even though I’m not into reading the m/m thing its seems that V and Butch would have been a better couple.
Jane (LU) gets so screwed over and she was such a strong character.
But its addictive.
Mel L. said on 11.24.07 at 09:24 AM • [link]
I am the only one OBSESSED with John’s story? I want him to hook up with Xhex (however you pronounce that bitch’s name), have sex that doesn’t involve a stairwell (tear) and find his HEA.
I was disappointed in myself that I didn’t expect more from the Butch/Vishous/Marissa triangle. Don’t get me wrong, I would have adored it if B & V hooked up and Marissa left to “find herself†and a new man…or woman (I wouldn’t have minded either way, b/c I wasn’t invested in her character all that much ). But because this is mainstream romance and the JR ward universe would have BLOWN UP if B&V got together, I knew the M/F relationships are almost all that’s allowed.
I knew I couldn’t invest too much of myself into the B/V relationship because I would be disappointed. The thought had crossed my mind that MAYBE like in some erotica I’ve read that they could ALL end up together as a M/F/M couple and could all screw each other’s brains out till kingdom come and satisfy all those straight, gay, and bi urges that seemed to be racking them through the books.
(Sigh) But I’ll still read everything else in this series and I’ll even buy it in hardback. And I FUCKING hate hardback. (Sigh) Goddamn crack.
Karen Scott said on 11.24.07 at 02:04 PM • [link]
I was disappointed in myself that I didn’t expect more from the Butch/Vishous/Marissa triangle
Ward should have gone the menage route. It would have been way more believable.
fleming said on 11.24.07 at 05:03 PM • [link]
Never understood why these books were popular… Thank fucking god someone finally agrees with me. I stopped reading the first book in this series half way through, a personal first. I wanted to punch a wall every time someone spoke.
lisabea said on 11.24.07 at 06:10 PM • [link]
Karen, from your mouth to Ward’s ears.
SandyW said on 11.24.07 at 07:12 PM • [link]
I suspected with the first book, I knew it by the second. Ward has written herself into a corner with the ‘vampires are born and not made’ theory. Most other vampire books, if a vampire falls in love with a human, the human goes through the sometimes arduous process of becoming a vampire and, Viola! happily EVER after. Or in some cases, the vampire becomes human again, but that usually comes off like a cop-out to me. I always thought it would be interesting to explore what happens when, after a couple of hundred years or so, the Happy Vampire Couple realizes that Ever After is a long time and they are heartily sick of one another, but I guess that would not go over too well.
Anyway, Ward is in the position of inventing a (somewhat) new and different way of giving the human half of the couple a vampire-length existence with every book. Going by recent books, I’d like to think she’s running out of ideas. Not to mention violating her own mythology more than once.
Am I still reading the series? Yes. Addiction is a terrible thing. Although, I do plan on getting the hardbacks from the library. I’m hooked, but I’m cheap.
Kassiana said on 11.24.07 at 08:26 PM • [link]
Yesssssssss! Someone else who agrees with my Kinsale hate! (Her work, not her; undoubtedly she’s a nice person who cares for children and small cute animals)
I’ve enjoyed John’s story so far. I’ll probably read the rest of the series sometime. I like the first four books very much. Yeah, they’re campy and silly; so’s Better Off Dead, and I like it just fine.
“Why is bondage always a sign of bad/wrong/issues with more ‘mainstream’ romance?”
I can recommend a romance where finding that they liked BDSM saved the secondary hero/heroine relationship: Something Deadly by Rachel Lee.
neasa said on 11.24.07 at 08:26 PM • [link]
Not addicted at all. I found the popularity of this series a bit of a head-scratcher, having only read Butch’s book. Then after your initial post, SB Sarah, I read some of the earlier books. And yeah, I can see the novelty factor is interesting but DUDE. The language, the melodrama, the angst! For uber-masculine guys, they kind of need to straighten up (ba-dum, tish) and be men, and not wussy cry-babies. D grade is definitely deserved for this book. I skipped the bits with John, Mr X and the Lessers (don’t care, don’t care) and it didn’t affect my understanding of what was going on at all. Surely this is a BAD thing? Kind of like random capitalisation…
Also, on a tangent, I find it very annoying the way she refers to the male characters in prose by their initials. I can just about accept it in dialogue, but it’s just lazy writing in prose. If the author doesn’t want to type “Butch” or “Vishous” then that is the time to use a personal pronoun. Grr. I’m glad I got that off my chest.
LesleyW said on 11.24.07 at 08:27 PM • [link]
“Butch: I hate to break it to you, but you weren’t there for the other scene we shot today. You were not needed as a conduit. Trust me. “
ROFLMAO.
I too no longer have the ‘I can’t possibly wait 6 months’ syndrome, which I’m very grateful for.
I think it was a combination of LR and LU that cured me. I’ll buy Phury’s book when it comes out, but it’s not a desperate thing any longer.
Though I do want to read John’s book. He’s been my favourite character since his first appearance.
laurad said on 11.24.07 at 08:47 PM • [link]
She might not have had the cojones to do it with main characters, but she is bringing along one of her baby vampires, can’t remember his name, who is going to be gay.
I’m in through Phury because he’s always been my phavorite, but unless that book is perphection, I may be done.
IMPO, I think Ward might be sort of a victim of her own success? First it was a contract for 3 books, possibly a 6 book series. Then it was a 10 book series. Now it’s a “limitless” series. She’s gone from a world-building scenerio with finite boundaries to one that has no end. That whole fangirl keep reeeeeeading thing makes me batshit crazy.
Krysia said on 11.24.07 at 09:42 PM • [link]
The only character out of these vamp books I’ve ever enjoyed was Rhage, and that’s because JR cheated by not only giving him shape-shifting abilities into a dragon complete with identifying tattoo (I so heart dragons), she pulled the “BRAD PITT” card whilst describing him.
I am allllllll about Brad Pitt.
My complete review of that Lover book—- was that Dark Lover? Whatever—- is on Amazon, and of course, my own website… And amongst my bitching, I definitely had to bring up the centuries-old vampire men and their strange bizarre urges to talk like wanna-be American Gangstas as opposed to the highly intelligent uber-beings they must be. Or at least, I’d like to *think* they must be after having lived through the eons. I would hope that after *I* have lived through a few centuries, that I could come up with a better greeting than “What up, yo?” which is a salutation I used in high school.
Sarah… You so totally rock. I loved your script. You still have those Percocets handy, because that’s the only way anyone’d ever get me to read through that drivel. ;-)
~ Krysia
Chicklet said on 11.24.07 at 10:50 PM • [link]
Don’t you mean he’s going to be ghay?
(Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
Krissie O said on 11.25.07 at 12:09 AM • [link]
Actually I despised Butch’s book and loved Vishous’s (though shame and crack are excellent terms). I liked the kink in Vishous’s book—it didn’t make me squirm like some erotica does.
But I’ve been tired of every male voice being the same, been revolted by Butch for a long time, and wish to god I didn’t have to overlook so much crap to get to the good stuff.
And Laura Kinsale is a god.
francois said on 11.25.07 at 08:29 PM • [link]
Like everyone else, I got through Dark Lover by missing out Mr X and the Lessers entirely. Perhaps they should instruct you to do that in the blurb on the cover? Along with warnings about Mary Sues, today’s letter is H and a warning that this-is-part-of-a-series.
2 out of 5 - I got through it but will never read this author again.
Jeaniene Frost said on 11.25.07 at 09:09 PM • [link]
“What is it with the focus being so heavy on the men to the point that us women are merely beautiful repositories for your manful lust?”
Word!
(excuse me, I meant, “Whord!”
Arethusa said on 11.25.07 at 09:33 PM • [link]
The next books are coming out in hardcover? Bwaahahahahahahahahaha. That’s the funniest thing I’ve read all week. Oh, oh wow. Wow. That’s. Hmmmm.
Miranda said on 11.26.07 at 05:14 AM • [link]
“the Happy Vampire Couple realizes that Ever After [is boring]”
Sorry, didn’t get the whole quote.
That idea gets kind of explored in the Forever Knight tv series. Nick and Jeanette would be together a while, then Jeanette would get bored and go off on her own.
wondering said on 11.26.07 at 04:11 PM • [link]
I’m almost finished this book but your review is way better! I read the entire review, laughing hysterically. I’m skimming the book just to get through. The sad part is I think this one is better than several others. I can’t even work up the interest to skim past the first few chapters, especially since I know how they end…
Scotsie said on 11.26.07 at 07:10 PM • [link]
I’m about 45 pages into LU, having finished LR over the Thanksgiving break. I can’t decide if Ward is doing something interesting and complex with the B&V sexual tension or if she’s being a wimp. To have B&V in this intense, passionate, connection could be a redefinition of male friendship. It could be breaking all the boundaries of what we have come to expect from m-m storylines. Perhaps she’s getting at a new way of being for male characters—rather than either being pigeon-holed into “best friend” or “lover”, there’s both going on at the same time.
Or maybe not.
The rest of the wanna-be gangbanger dialog, weak female characters, and inconsistent and contradictory world-building makes me believe otherwise.
Prue said on 11.27.07 at 05:25 PM • [link]
Thanks for your review. I totally agree that Marissa is a Mary-Sue to the point of being a wallbanger. All I can say is read on, it looks like Phury is going to get one that is a step or two worse than Marrisa.
LU cured me a little from my addiction. I am not hanging out for the next one like I have been for the others. I think it will get even easier when we get to Rehv’s book. I am not risking the price of a hard cover. Plus the books are now Fiction not Romance. That means that JR can change the HEA rule.
pkg said on 11.28.07 at 04:33 AM • [link]
Wow, I thought the review itself was funny, but the ensueing amount of snark on this is out of this fricking world! Can anyone say ‘bhitches’? And not in the good way.
I liked the book. I liked the ones before it too. Yes, I thought it had some problems, and yes, the superfluous Hs can be annoying. And YES, I thought V & B should have gotten together.
But HELLO!!! Has anyone actually read any other romances lately? What’s allthis shit about Mary Sues? LIKE ANY OTHER ROMANCE IN THE FRICKING WORLD bar a small few AREN’T POPULATED BY MARY SUES???? I mean, Nora Roberts anyone? (I like Nora too in small doses). But no, pens at thirty paces against this one.
I’m not saying the books are perfect, but they’re a lot less deserving of the amount of snark they are receiving here.
So there everyone - right back at you!
Love, P
pkg said on 11.28.07 at 04:57 AM • [link]
Ok note to self, must do the Preview thing next time.
I have noticed I just called everyone here a ‘bhitch’ - not quite what I meant. I disagree with just about every one of you, but it’s not a crime you don’t think my way, is it? Nope. Damn.
Also, the fake and insincere ‘Love’ at the end also annoyed even me. So please strike that from the record.
Still disagree with y’all though.
Ooo, my code is death23! Wow, how in keeping with my general mood of the day. Cool.
Amelia "Fuckheady Bitchipants" Elias said on 11.29.07 at 05:12 AM • [link]
How did I miss this review when it first posted? This took me past LOL and into UGSK territory—uncontrollable guffaws scare kids. You completely nailed my problems with this book.
And Phury’s book? I will not be buying, which is sad because at one time, his was the one I was most looking forward to. She’s completely ruined him for me since Zsadist’s book. His twin, who had suffered horribly and for whom Phury had sacrificed so much, is now happy and healing. What kind of ass wouldn’t at least attempt to be happy for him?
Besides that, I’m not into drug addicts at all, and he whines WAY too much. “Oh, I can’t have my brother’s wife, so instead of making any sort of positive move like trying to find a woman of my own, I’ll just drink even MORE—and I already drank like a fish—and smoke drugs all the time. And think about suicide. And do more drugs, too.” This is not heroic behavior. Even the “damaged hero” doesn’t stretch this far, IMO. When I read about a dangerous hero, I need to believe that he might be bad for everyone else, but he’d be good to his woman. Phury is in a self-destructive pattern that would destroy anyone around him. NOT romantic!
So no, definitely no Phury book for me. My walls need no additional dents.
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