Bitchin' Blog Posts
LOLCover Snark - A Contest!
by SB Sarah | by SB Sarah | April 16, 2008 | Wednesday at 8:30 pm | 124 CommentsInspired by snarkhunter’s comment in our last cover snark, and clamored for by many, including me despite my own exceptionally poor OMG Bad Photoshop skillz (they are not uber uber l33t by a longshot), behold: a contest to kick off our new site design. I give you: LOL COVER SNARK!
The rules: add your LOLCoverSnark to the comments, and we’ll judge in the comment thread itself for the best of the group. You can .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) your vote if you don’t like to comment (Hi Lurkers! Hayadoin?). Comments will close in
24
48 hours (G’day Australia!) and winners will get books and a Romance Novel magnetic poetry set for their very own.
And now, our samples, let us show you them.
Filed: Covers Gone Wild! (Non-Snoop Dogg Edition), Go Ahead, Win Some Shit
Tagged: win some shit, cover snark
CantateForever said on 04.16.08 at 09:03 PM • [link]
Oh my. Penis goes where? Perfect.
Christina said on 04.16.08 at 09:20 PM • [link]
I love these sample covers!!! I did some hunting and found a HI-larious site:
http://www.worldoflongmire.com (under features) that spoofs romance book covers. Funny, funny!
Techie said on 04.16.08 at 09:26 PM • [link]
#2: SRY U WUZ SAYIN SOMETHIN?
Emma Petersen said on 04.16.08 at 09:27 PM • [link]
LMAO! Psssst You is adopted! LMAO!!!
Lleeo said on 04.16.08 at 09:30 PM • [link]
Ohhhh… penis goes there LOL! The double penis one is amazing. ;D
But I have to admit, I think Logmire has you beat with his The Love Bum cover:
I think changing the tag-line under the title and the ‘Author of’ part to match the title was a particularly brilliant touch. I mean, The Love Bum: The stars were his ceiling, a refrigerator box his den of love…” ROFL!
I really wish I had Photoshop now…
And because fart jokes never get old, one more:
Victoria Janssen said on 04.16.08 at 10:02 PM • [link]
LOL!
I really needed these today.
allison said on 04.16.08 at 10:38 PM • [link]
#5 NOM NOM NOM!!
OR
#6 UR ASS I FINDZ IT… NO SRSLY I FINDZ IT… NO WAITZ…
Victoria Janssen said on 04.16.08 at 10:47 PM • [link]
http://www.geekflirt.com/ucats/saved/1208378728583.jpg
RStewie said on 04.16.08 at 10:47 PM • [link]
#1: Ur man-titty iz makin me hungrys.
#4: Want oral first! kthx.
or
Ur conditioner. I needs some.
#5: Ur Man-titty. Do Not Want!
Victoria Janssen said on 04.16.08 at 10:51 PM • [link]
Trying again to post directly into comment….
Leslie Dicken said on 04.16.08 at 10:52 PM • [link]
ok, here’s a lame one I did with one of my own covers! LOL!
Jaci Burton said on 04.16.08 at 10:54 PM • [link]
#1 - I CAN HAS UR PENIS NAO?
#2 - I M IN UR EAR, NOMMING UR EARWIGS
#3 - I HAS SEKRIT BEBEH.
Shannon Stacey said on 04.16.08 at 10:55 PM • [link]
#3: My adamz apple…I hides it.
Leslie Dicken said on 04.16.08 at 10:56 PM • [link]
#1
MMM, I LICK OFF ALL YOUR HAIR
#5
DAMN, YOU IS UGLY
#7
WAIT, THE SWAN IS WATCHING!
R. said on 04.16.08 at 11:20 PM • [link]
Ye gods, I’m channelling Jimmy Buffett:
I don’t know -
I don’t know -
I don’t know where it’sa gonna go,
Butt it ain’t goin’ there!
Amie said on 04.16.08 at 11:26 PM • [link]
#3 Man Titteh…I needz it
Mfred said on 04.16.08 at 11:43 PM • [link]
I’m a lurker but I’ve being compelled by the LOLgawds to comment.
#1 - Nao move hand leetle more 2 center. Guuuud.
#5 - I sayz stop! Americanz Idul iz on!!
Cat Marsters said on 04.16.08 at 11:55 PM • [link]
Personally I love the Penis Sequels…and now I’m going to go off and look for some of my own to Photoshop. But in the meantime:
1. Turn ma ribbon key: I iz winding down
2. Plz help cover up ma wardrobe malfunction kthx
3. Look in2 ma eyz, U is feelin sleepy…now tell me ur bank detailz
4. I’s a redhead in pink…kill me now
5. Get this eegle off my hed…I payz U kthx
6. Ow! U broke by dose!
7. Dude…iz U wearin nail polish?
karmelrio said on 04.16.08 at 11:59 PM • [link]
logmire’s “Pull My Finger” cover almost made me piss myself.
A few of my LOLCoverz…
#4 I HAZ STOCKHOLM SYNDROME KTHXBAI
#5 - PSSSST…THAT BIG_ASS BIRD JUST CRAPPED ON MY BACK.
Aubrey said on 04.17.08 at 12:19 AM • [link]
Because I have way too much time on my hands…
Esri Rose said on 04.17.08 at 12:30 AM • [link]
#1 My leg broke. Carry me wid stubby armz.
#2 Fall asleep, Mr.? I wake you with lil’ purpl Tazr!
#3 Tweezy nose hairs fall in lip gloss. I hidez.
#4 Fabio! Why U no CALL me?!
#5 Srry. No spirit animal in 3-some.
#6 2 many Mojitos. U carry me.
#7 Leda’s boyfriend’s ASS. I kickt it.
Esri Rose said on 04.17.08 at 12:36 AM • [link]
One more for #1…
Sansabelt and Mullet…
I can has?
Esri Rose said on 04.17.08 at 12:43 AM • [link]
Can’t stop. Another for #1.
Fabio!
My name iz KIM!
Esri Rose said on 04.17.08 at 12:46 AM • [link]
Dangit! That was for #4
“Fabio!
My name iz KIM!”
Esri Rose said on 04.17.08 at 12:50 AM • [link]
#5
Urk..
Fly-by wedgie.
Gemma said on 04.17.08 at 01:01 AM • [link]
Fun. Must stop now. :)
AnimeJune said on 04.17.08 at 01:06 AM • [link]
AnimeJune said on 04.17.08 at 01:23 AM • [link]
Meg said on 04.17.08 at 01:23 AM • [link]
jenifer said on 04.17.08 at 01:28 AM • [link]
Esri Rose said on 04.17.08 at 01:29 AM • [link]
Gemma! Ha! LOve the buttsecks one. I love that a cover like that exists. In fact, I might have to look that up and buy it.
job said on 04.17.08 at 01:47 AM • [link]
#1 invisable cloze brush
#2 android luv. We haz it
#3 green scum. It etz us.
Mel-O-Drama said on 04.17.08 at 02:00 AM • [link]
Jennifer! You made me LOL at the ‘hooha’ cover. Hands down, iz mah favorite.
Goblin said on 04.17.08 at 02:04 AM • [link]
The “My Philips’ Head…” one is brilliant!
Tina C. said on 04.17.08 at 02:21 AM • [link]
Darlene Marshall said on 04.17.08 at 02:26 AM • [link]
“My Phillips Head” for the win.
AnimeJune said on 04.17.08 at 02:53 AM • [link]
Can I vote for myself? Because I laughed myself silly making this one.
Jill D. said on 04.17.08 at 02:55 AM • [link]
I love the phillips head one too! It definitely has my vote! I even brought my husband over and he chuckled too!
--E said on 04.17.08 at 03:05 AM • [link]
Oh bother! I just relocated, and all my books are still packed (and my scanner not set up). I keep meaning to post the vintage Johanna Lindsey cover where the nekkid man has a burst (pointy seal with publisher’s blurb) covering his butt.
Anyway…
#1: I PULL STRING. WHY U NO EAT?
#2: I LUVS YOU, ANDROID GURL.
#3: DIS NOT FAN. I FRILL-NECKED LIZARD WERE.
#4: UR HAIR BLOCKS MAH VIEW UF CEILING CAT.
#7. UR SKIN…IT’S SO…GROOVY. EVERYTING SO TRIPPY…
Elyssa said on 04.17.08 at 03:28 AM • [link]
Chicken pocks one has mine. LMAO. Brillaint. Beyond brillaint.
Poison Ivy said on 04.17.08 at 03:52 AM • [link]
Laughing myself silly. “I iz doktor.” Brilliant.
Trumystique said on 04.17.08 at 03:54 AM • [link]
The mantittie milk one is brilliant ! Also the Philips head one made me chucklet too.
Tinkerbon said on 04.17.08 at 03:54 AM • [link]
Testing to see if I can do this ...
Tinkerbon said on 04.17.08 at 03:58 AM • [link]
Oh oh, I figured it out!!!
— Bonz
Sara Reinke said on 04.17.08 at 04:08 AM • [link]
I had to try this, heh heh. Hopefully I won’t screw up the HTML…
rebyj said on 04.17.08 at 04:09 AM • [link]
Sara Reinke said on 04.17.08 at 04:10 AM • [link]
Oops. Glaggh. Sorry about that. I emailed mine to Sarah. Just tape a big DOH! onto my forehead.
Sara Reinke said on 04.17.08 at 04:14 AM • [link]
Trying again. If I mess up this time with the HTML, I am officially going to go blow my husband and call it a night…
Melissandre said on 04.17.08 at 04:35 AM • [link]
Help! I don’t know how to add my picture!
Leah said on 04.17.08 at 04:36 AM • [link]
Ok, I iz doktor was my fave….but I about busted a gut when I saw “speshul bubbles”!!!!!!!!!!!!! Srsly.
Kaitlin said on 04.17.08 at 04:38 AM • [link]
Oh, special bubbles for the win! I’m eating dinner and I almost snorted corn! That’s what I get for reading these while eating. :)
SB Sarah said on 04.17.08 at 04:51 AM • [link]
A few from teh email:
From Sara
And from Brandyllyn:
Brandylln said on 04.17.08 at 04:55 AM • [link]
Okay, I’ve got two
and my favorite
Check out mt l33t photoshop skills. I just hope they show, my html isn’t really to par
lijakaca said on 04.17.08 at 05:20 AM • [link]
OK, I have no idea if this will work, so DIS IZ TEST:
Spamword: island77 - yes I was born on an island in ‘77! this thing is magic!
Tinkerbon said on 04.17.08 at 05:35 AM • [link]
Trying again ...
Sooo addicting, but I promise ... no morez!
— bonz
Soni said on 04.17.08 at 05:42 AM • [link]
*snort* my captcha code was piece69…
EJ McKenna said on 04.17.08 at 06:12 AM • [link]
What a glorious comeback.
And thanks for thinking of us down under….
I’m laughing too hard to come up with a lolcat… I mean, lolbookcovva.
Moar! Moar!
EJ McKenna said on 04.17.08 at 06:28 AM • [link]
Hope this works…
But wait, I had an idea…
Laurel said on 04.17.08 at 06:30 AM • [link]
These aren’t mine, but they are my favorite thing on the internet ever so I wanted to share them:
Romance novel parodies by VeryBigJen
It helps that she’s a photoshop pro, I mean a real pro.
SonomaLass said on 04.17.08 at 06:32 AM • [link]
Buttseks plan, LOL! In ur hoo ha, LOL! Leroy Jenkins!?!?! OMG, I’m gonna die, srsly!!
spamword: yet98. No, I’m not (but I’ll be halfway there this summer).
Christina said on 04.17.08 at 06:36 AM • [link]
LOL!!! Leroy Jenkins :)
I’ve srsly busted a gut over all of these!
Tinkerbon said on 04.17.08 at 06:39 AM • [link]
After this, I promise I’m going to turn the computer off and go to sleep ...
— Bonz
jocelynnesimone said on 04.17.08 at 06:44 AM • [link]
Leroy Jenkins FTW!
But “My philips head..” was a close close second for me.
Jenyfer Matthews said on 04.17.08 at 07:53 AM • [link]
So many great covers, so hard to choose!
I loved the phillips head and the special bubbles but Gemma’s buttsecks plan was my absolute fav!
Denni said on 04.17.08 at 08:20 AM • [link]
o, the laffs tey hrt.
I vote fore “IM in ur hoo ha, bein so ded”
jadawulf said on 04.17.08 at 08:52 AM • [link]
Okay, I’ve never posted here before but I couldn’t resist coming up with something for this contest. Let’s hope this works…
jadawulf said on 04.17.08 at 09:03 AM • [link]
Trying this one more time (I’m bad with coding if it isn’t obvious)
JessicaAnne said on 04.17.08 at 09:50 AM • [link]
These are great! Love the ‘buttsecks plan’ cover and the ‘speshul bubbles’. Hmmm…wonder if I can come up with something….
megalith said on 04.17.08 at 11:17 AM • [link]
Lord, I hope this works. My abject and groveling if it don’t.
megalith said on 04.17.08 at 11:26 AM • [link]
Well, crap. I suk. Let’s try this again.
JessicaAnne said on 04.17.08 at 11:29 AM • [link]
JessicaAnne said on 04.17.08 at 11:30 AM • [link]
JessicaAnne said on 04.17.08 at 11:31 AM • [link]
Cat Marsters said on 04.17.08 at 11:31 AM • [link]
It’s either Philips Head or Chikin Poks for me.
Or… (just checking I can get the code right)
Cat Marsters said on 04.17.08 at 11:33 AM • [link]
Groovy.
Darlene Marshall said on 04.17.08 at 02:32 PM • [link]
Phillips Head?!1! Leroy Jenkins!??11
Oh noes, 2 much laffin!
Iz ded.
Leslie Dicken said on 04.17.08 at 02:36 PM • [link]
ROFLMAO! You all are WAY more creative and talented than me!
BRAVO!!!!!!!
(My verification word is “average82”! That’s me! Snort!!)
Mellie said on 04.17.08 at 03:03 PM • [link]
LMAO- Cat Marsters Buttsecks covers are killing me!
Lorelie said on 04.17.08 at 03:05 PM • [link]
My votes go to “I can has methadone”, closely followed by the two-fer of Cat Marsten’s buttsecks combo.
Lyvvie said on 04.17.08 at 03:40 PM • [link]
The mantitty milk one was brilliant.
soakbonus said on 04.17.08 at 04:33 PM • [link]
I like the “If you find it” one the best so far, but all of these are excellent.
snarkhunter said on 04.17.08 at 04:35 PM • [link]
I inspired a contest?! YAY.
My brain iz ded, though. :( My only good idea is already up there as a sample. BUT EVERYONE ELSE’S ARE AWESOME.
Eva Lynn said on 04.17.08 at 04:48 PM • [link]
(What, no ‘preview’ option? Hope that worked.)
Aubrey said on 04.17.08 at 05:00 PM • [link]
Thanks everyone for LOLing at my Phillips’ Head one. :-)
And because I can’t stop doing these…
My verification word was “bring34.” I’m sure I could find 34 more of these if it wasn’t for that little thing called a job.
BTW, I love the secret bubbles one. I almost spit out my frappuccino.
rebyj said on 04.17.08 at 05:13 PM • [link]
so many funny ones!
Gemma’s mantitty milk one made me laugh the hardest.
Victoria Janssen said on 04.17.08 at 05:34 PM • [link]
My faves so far are the Phillips Head one and the man-titty milk (last night at choir, we were singing a Handel piece, which has the line “kings shall be our nursing fathers”).
Eva Lynn said on 04.17.08 at 06:04 PM • [link]
Eva Lynn said on 04.17.08 at 06:32 PM • [link]
Mrm. I don’t think mine worked, so here’s another try, different host. Sorry if they in fact DID work and you’re forced to see ‘em twice—I’d delete the other tries if I could.
P.S.: I love “Leroy Jenkins” and “You eated my cookie?”!
Tracy said on 04.17.08 at 08:07 PM • [link]
Ok, coversnark is really making me miss the pop-up comments window :(
So much better when I could read the comments and look at the covers side-by-side. Though I suppose I could always open another window…..... But that little pink window sure came in handy and was easily hidden when I had to look busy at work!
Gemma said on 04.17.08 at 09:00 PM • [link]
Props to Eva Lynn. I was trying to work out how you could get ceiling cat in, but gave up. You carried it off with panache.
I have about fifteen favourite entries so far. I don’t think I can bring myself to vote against fourteen of them. Hmmm.
Rebecca said on 04.17.08 at 09:07 PM • [link]
Okay, I know this is past time. Here are mine. I hope these show up:
iz ready to make cheezeburger.jpg
deh fish was dis big.jpg
control_he needs it2.jpg
Rebecca said on 04.17.08 at 09:09 PM • [link]
Darn. I don’t know how to upload the pics.
Can someone help me?
R
Eva Lynn said on 04.17.08 at 09:44 PM • [link]
Thanks, Gemma! :)
Rebecca—to put the pics here, you have to first upload them to another server (Photobucket works for sure, I had trouble with a couple others first). Then you copy the url to the picture, and paste it in here so that it looks something like this:
<img src=“http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk100/yourusername/
yourgallery/yourpicture.jpg”>
Of course your url (the part between the quotes) will be different, but… that’s basically how.
AnimeJun said on 04.17.08 at 09:48 PM • [link]
Jennifer Crusie’s “You Eated My Cookie” for the WIN!
Jaci Burton said on 04.17.08 at 09:49 PM • [link]
I snorted my 7 Up over IM IN UR HOO HA BEIN DED.
kerry said on 04.17.08 at 10:31 PM • [link]
R. said on 04.17.08 at 11:01 PM • [link]
A question that comes to my mind [besides the requisite wtf-moment] damn near every time I see a romance cover:
What the hell is it with the woman’s hair?
Gah! Candidly, those huge, mushroom clouds of varying hues billowing out of women’s craniums are even more disturbing to me than Men with Mullets.
back84 - no, no, no, way worse than it was back in ‘84.
Candy said on 04.17.08 at 11:17 PM • [link]
These are all covers by Rebecca J:
Candy said on 04.17.08 at 11:19 PM • [link]
These are by Sara R:
Candy said on 04.17.08 at 11:20 PM • [link]
This one’s from Tina:
Phyllis said on 04.17.08 at 11:39 PM • [link]
And a vote for the nose hair mullet :)
Phyllis said on 04.17.08 at 11:42 PM • [link]
Well, that didn’t upload. How about this:
karmelrio said on 04.17.08 at 11:58 PM • [link]
Alas I don’t have Photoshop skillz but allow me to riff off Rebecca J.‘s and Sara R.‘s excellent work:
Rebecca J’s Giant Brides cover: “Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Bride”
Rebecca J’s purple Nocturne cover: “Yes, My Balls ARE This Big”
Sara R.s “Sassy” cover: “The Guys Just Call Me Twink”
Amie said on 04.18.08 at 01:03 AM • [link]
i’m LMAO@Cheezburger inferno!
Trumystique said on 04.18.08 at 02:10 AM • [link]
3rd place goes to ” They call him SassY”. Made me laugh out loud.
EJ McKenna said on 04.18.08 at 03:14 AM • [link]
Thank you Phyllis for doing what I was thinking, only better.
Tinkerbon, you are insanely good.
(growth 15… what’s this trying to tell me?)
Eva Lynn said on 04.18.08 at 03:38 AM • [link]
Am definitely having too much fun wasting time with this today.
(half the romance novels in the world set in Scotland, and this was the ONLY romance I could find with a sheep in view…)
Wryhag said on 04.18.08 at 04:44 AM • [link]
Oh, these were good. But freakin’ Longmire RULES. (I swear, as often as I’ve seen those covers, they still make me laugh-cry.) The Toy in Daddy’s Pants. Lord of the Hissy-Fit. CLASSICS.
Wryhag said on 04.18.08 at 05:04 AM • [link]
Oops, forgot to add I loved Sara R’s They Call Him Sassy. Perfect in every way!
Sara Reinke said on 04.18.08 at 05:13 AM • [link]
Thanks for the votes of confidence, guys, and thanks to Candy for uploading my images, since I couldn’t figure it out! ;)
I ought to add my apologies to Lori Foster for snagging her cover for my “Sassy” fella, but I just couldn’t resist. She can wring my neck at the Get-Together in June, heh heh heh
I’m dying over the “Invisible Neck” one. Brilliant. heh heh
Hortense Powdermaker said on 04.18.08 at 07:07 AM • [link]
I vote for Mr. Phillips Head.
For anyone clueless about WOW, Leeroy Jenkins videos can be seen at http://www.leeroyjenkins.net/ (it helps explain the cover snark)
Tinkerbon said on 04.18.08 at 07:22 AM • [link]
Can’t stop the signal ...
And totally off topic, but I went on a rampage a few years ago when we were seeing “The Running Couple” on every second romance cover ...
These days I *try* to use my photoshop powers for good, not evil. Heh.
— Bonz
Hortense Powdermaker said on 04.18.08 at 07:32 AM • [link]
- Or alternatively, for Mr. Phillips Head -
ORANGE U GLAD I HAS A BANANA?ORANGE U GLAD I HAS A BANANA?
SonomaLass said on 04.18.08 at 07:37 AM • [link]
Okay, me + uploading pictures usually = suck, but I will try. Mind you, this isn’t a book cover, but it is romance snark and I loves it.
tracyleann said on 04.18.08 at 05:52 PM • [link]
1. Invisible Neck
2. They Call Him Sassy
3. Serious Cowboy (the idea was PERFECT, though the full title was a bit confusing)
Lorelie said on 04.18.08 at 06:44 PM • [link]
SonomaLass, that was frickin hilarious!!!! Did you do that one?
Trash Addict said on 04.18.08 at 07:11 PM • [link]
1. Savage Crotch by Jadawuf
2. Cultural Sensitivity - Ur doin it wrong by Eva Lynn
OMG, these were hilarious!
I have a sudden need for fringed buckskin…
karmelrio said on 04.18.08 at 08:03 PM • [link]
Where’s your nearest International Male store?
SonomaLass said on 04.18.08 at 08:39 PM • [link]
Lorelie,
Thanx! Yeah, that’s all mine (with some input from my DP). Glad it made you laugh.
Rebecca said on 04.19.08 at 04:16 AM • [link]
Thanks for uploading my covers, Candy!
Thanks for the instructions, Eva Lynn. :)
Glad the rest of you liked my covers.
Melissandre said on 04.19.08 at 05:39 AM • [link]
I may be too late, but I’m still gonna try it…
I did make the cover on the first day. It just took me this long to figure out how to post (if I did it right). Issues. I haz dem.
Melissandre said on 04.19.08 at 05:40 AM • [link]
Issues! I srsly haz dem! Dangit!
Madd said on 04.19.08 at 07:31 AM • [link]
I wanted to do the Midnight Fantasies cover, because the heronie on the cover looks like a trannie who’s about to give the her a big suprise.
Madd said on 04.19.08 at 07:33 AM • [link]
but I couldn’t get a big enough copy of the pic.
Note to self: Finish thoughts before clicking submit. Drinking is no excuse!
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