Bitchin' Blog Posts
Friday Videos are Late, But Still saying WTF?
by SB Sarah | by SB Sarah | July 04, 2009 | Saturday at 3:47 am | 55 CommentsSo you know how people picture different actors or models or even random dudes they know in the role of fictional heroes? Yeah. I would be shocked if anyone pictured any of these dudes as the heroes of the Black Dagger Brotherhood.
Especially fluttery Brad with his long long hair.
Filed: Friday Videos, General Bitching
Tagged: wtfery, videos, black dagger brotherhood,
earthgirl said on 07.04.09 at 04:03 AM • [link]
Rhage? Really?
Kym said on 07.04.09 at 04:34 AM • [link]
And all of a sudden I feel the need to re-read Lover Unbound to see if I can somehow develop a crush on Vishous and forgo Zsadist.
Rachael said on 07.04.09 at 04:53 AM • [link]
You know, I could see Paul Walker as Rhage. But that’s it. The rest of them, especially Zsadist (WTF, Buffy guy?) and Ryan Reynolds for Vishous (the hell?) - are just not what I saw when I read the books.
shannon said on 07.04.09 at 05:07 AM • [link]
um…........hella NO…and 5 more to go with it…geez, spike as Z???....teh no!
Polly said on 07.04.09 at 05:22 AM • [link]
Hell, yeah! That was hilarious! And the hair on Brad Pitt. I’d forgotten it used to be like that. I love that whoever put this together was clearly trying to choose shots that showcased everyone’s characteristic emotions—Zsadist (Spike!) is Tortured, Phury is Troubled and Emo.
Ocy said on 07.04.09 at 05:27 AM • [link]
I started laughing hysterically when James Marsters (Spike) came on the screen, and haven’t quite stopped yet… oh, man.
Melissandre said on 07.04.09 at 06:03 AM • [link]
I can literally hear the Brothers bitching that anyone would dare put their stories in a trailer with a Pink song. That sums up the fail of that clip right there. Meanwhile, I’m sorry Hugh, but this guy is Wrath:
.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
PS - This is an actual cartoon character, which I sadly saw before reading any of the books. Now he’s eternally cast in my head movie!
Melissandre said on 07.04.09 at 06:05 AM • [link]
My skillz at teh interwebs sucks. Hope this works instead:
Alisha Rai said on 07.04.09 at 06:06 AM • [link]
I was trying to figure out who the actor playing Butch was, but then the writing told me it was Colin Farrell. Thanks! And, wha?
Melissandre said on 07.04.09 at 06:07 AM • [link]
*Sigh*
Wrath
Melissandre said on 07.04.09 at 06:11 AM • [link]
*Sigh* Once more, with feeling.
Wrath
I suck.
Meggrs said on 07.04.09 at 06:15 AM • [link]
Wrath? No. Rhage? No. Zsadist? WTF no. Butch? Um, sorta close, actually. Damn. V? Smoking hot RR, but no. Phury? HAHAHAHAHAHA. Gasp. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
And props to Melissandre for mentioning that editing together a Brotherhood clip to a Pink song is unintentionally HILARIOUS.
Wow. I mean, I TOTALLY get the idea of casting a role in your head—I do it all the time. But with the possible exception of Colin Farrell’s Miami Vice role for Butch, and (HAHAHAHAHA) emo Brad Pitt for Phury (God, I hate Phury), none of this even remotely resonates with me.
Then again, if I had to mention at gunpoint who I had mentally cast in some of these roles, I’d likely get stoned off the interwebs, so….
ShellBell said on 07.04.09 at 10:10 AM • [link]
None of the actors appeal to me at all, let alone visualizing them as the Brothers!
Bonnie said on 07.04.09 at 02:22 PM • [link]
Hahahahahaha!!!! Smith Jerrod!!
Ah… thanks, I needed that.
Mireya said on 07.04.09 at 03:30 PM • [link]
This person didn’t read the same books I did. That’s all I have to say.
Susan/DC said on 07.04.09 at 04:10 PM • [link]
I haven’t read the books so have no opinion on which actor fits the role, but I have to say I found Jason Lewis (Rhage in the video) pretty intriguing. Heck, I just found him pretty. He’s the only one of the actors I didn’t recognize and haven’t seen before—who is he and what’s he been in? I may need to get out more.
Kate Jones said on 07.04.09 at 05:18 PM • [link]
Spike and Brad Pitt as the twins? Really?? I know they don’t really look alike, what with the scars and everything, but in the immortal words of GOB Bluth, “COME ON!!”
Spam word “various92.” Indeed.
closetcrafter said on 07.04.09 at 06:10 PM • [link]
Has everyone forgotten that these guys are supposed to be HUGE, like cartoonishly huge? Like the Pink song, but come on that was a big bunch of Pansies with the wrong color hair. Had to stop watching it when they got to Butch. Colin Farrell is like 5’6” people. Come on. Brad Pitt weighs 2 pounds and Hugh Jackman has the proper intensity and is tall, but weighs 2 and 1/2 lbs. If they were going to use real people to represent those guys, they would have to come from MMA. You know with real musculature and some tatoos and scarring.
Meggrs said on 07.04.09 at 08:43 PM • [link]
OMG, closetcrafter, I would now KILL to see someone redo this video with pro wrestlers and death metal.
Or, yanno, rap, since the Brotherhood are the whitest black brothers out there. Sigh.
lissa said on 07.04.09 at 09:12 PM • [link]
Goes to look for images of wrestlers…and Oh my…I maybe they are all /NOT/ steroid pumped up men. These muscles actually look natural. And that one already has the black work Tattoo…hum..
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_xQB6vjCswXQ/RshxHQOwTaI/AAAAAAAAABE/KuB5vqwN9nk/s1600/5116064[1].jpg
Quizzabella said on 07.04.09 at 09:23 PM • [link]
Lol, Melissandre that picture of Wrath is totally Peter Steele from the band Type O Negative.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Steele
Zoe Archer said on 07.04.09 at 09:50 PM • [link]
I could say something relatively erudite and profound about the subjective nature of reading and how each reader interacts with the material in a closed system of engagement that is highly dependent on their idiosyncrasies, psychological landscape and cultural environs.
Instead, I’ll say: guh?
shannon said on 07.04.09 at 10:28 PM • [link]
i have ALWAYS thought a young pre-strung out peter steele was a ringer for wrath…again…PRE-strungout.. he even did a layout for playgirl waaaaay back ....in his prime
Robin said on 07.04.09 at 11:11 PM • [link]
I don’t think any of those guys were big enough to qualify as one of the Brothers but my mind easily dismissed the whole premise and proceeded to enjoy the clip anyway.
Ohhh, pretty.
ashley said on 07.05.09 at 12:05 AM • [link]
I’ve never read the black dagger brotherhood but I think Hugh Jackman could play most any romance novel hero. also, that was a great video, it makes me really want to read the books and the characters have distinctive enough personalities that they don’t look like repeats of each other. plus, any character who could be played by brooding tortured spike looks interesting enough for me. :)
kinseyholley said on 07.05.09 at 12:33 AM • [link]
Susan: Jason Lewis played a regular character on Sex and the City - he was in the movie as well. See Absolute Hunk
I think he might be a good Rhage. All the other casting choices were whack.
I’ve never come up with a good choice for my boy V.
Gram said on 07.05.09 at 12:41 AM • [link]
Love the music!!! Death92 seems appropo!
Gram said on 07.05.09 at 12:41 AM • [link]
Apropro!
GrowlyCub said on 07.05.09 at 03:39 AM • [link]
I haven’t read any of the books and no plans to, but I have to say I had never seen Ryan Reynolds before and yum, eye candy! :)
I didn’t recognize Jackman with the long hair. Farrell is nice to look at if one can forget that he’s like ... short.
Janet Mullany said on 07.05.09 at 03:43 AM • [link]
I’ve always thought of them as WWE types, sitting on normal furniture and breaking it etc. Not the sort of people you’d want to have around the hhouse.
(hot85. Yeah)
romantic@heart said on 07.05.09 at 06:21 AM • [link]
Or Dolph Lundgren/Arnold Swarzenegger during their heydays. None of these pretty boys.
daisy said on 07.05.09 at 07:13 AM • [link]
Um - aren’t two of those brothers supposed to be twins? Like, really look alike twins?
Nice thought and liked the song, but bigger, we need bigger for the Brothers. Way bigger.
Zoe Archer said on 07.05.09 at 07:24 AM • [link]
As the wife of a short man, I have to say that there’s nothing wrong with a not-tall guy. (And I get particularly riled when, in books and films, the villain is often a shorter man who is ridiculed for daring to presume he’s as viable as the taller hero.)
Maybe it’s because I’m 5’, but this oversized alpha males are not appealing to me at all. I like my men man-sized, not mountainous. :)
Jessica Scott said on 07.05.09 at 07:45 AM • [link]
Having only read the first in the Black Dagger series, I have to say Hugh Jackman as Wrath *almost* worked for me. I was really interested to see who Zsadist would end up as and when Spike came on screen…yeah, not so much. Ah well…now let’s see if the character descriptions in the books can overcome this trailer when I get to reading the whole series…hopefully before I go home from Iraq!
Kaetrin said on 07.05.09 at 10:35 AM • [link]
I can sorta kinda see Colin Farrell as Butch, sorta - but the others - nah. The others need to be much BIGGER and MEANER looking, at the very least… oh well, diff’rent stokes…
GrowlyCub said on 07.05.09 at 01:20 PM • [link]
Zoe, my experience is rather different. Every short guy that I have ever met has had what I call the ‘Napoleon complex’. And unfortunately, if you look in history, a lot of the real life villains have been short men that tried to overcome their inferiority complex by tyranny over the masses.
Does that mean that every short guy is badly adjusted? Probably not, but I just haven’t come across any that weren’t.
Zoe Archer said on 07.05.09 at 06:07 PM • [link]
Just curious, GrowlyCub, were these men acting unnecessarily aggressive, or is it that they were as outspoken as taller men, but it seemed disproportionate in conjunction with their height?
This interests me, because most of the men in my life, including my father, stepfather, brother, husband, father-in-law and brother-in-law are all what would be deemed short, and none of them have ever seemed to me to be excessively aggressive. They’re just men, with all the facets of personality that any man has. Now, I can’t say that none of them feel the effects of prejudice against them being short. It definitely impacts them when the world sees them as less viable men simply because of their height, but it hasn’t made them into meglomaniacal assholes.
I understand the function of having tall heroes in romance novels. These men are hypermasculine, and need to function as idealizations of masculinity, which translates generally in our culture as being at least six feet tall. But I can’t get behind a bias against shorter men in real life when all around me I have evidence of warm, loving, protective men who are less than 5’7”.
Sorry—this is one of my hot-button topics because it is something that I face daily, and so I felt compelled to give my opinion on the viability of and prejudice against shorter men. Don’t rule them out!
/end soapbox
Susan/DC said on 07.05.09 at 06:42 PM • [link]
re: Jason Lewis
I definitely need to get out more, or at least rent the Sex and the City DVDs.
As I said, since I haven’t read the books I have no opinion on whether the specific actors fit the specific roles. I know that the vast majority of romance novel heroes are XXL, and it seems that the BDB are even bigger. But I must agree with Zoe Archer that in Real Life not all short men have Napoleon complexes. My husband and sons are short but they are also very smart, funny, perceptive, and self-assured. My oldest and youngest both work out and have bodies any man would envy and any woman would like to get her hands on. Would they like to be taller? Yes. Do they feel they have to overcompensate for lack of height? Not so much. And it’s not just that I’m biased toward these men I love. I work with three men who are 6’5” who are great, but I also work with a number of men who aren’t much taller than my own 5’2”, and they’re great too.
GrowlyCub said on 07.05.09 at 07:10 PM • [link]
Zoe,
I don’t think I’d necessarily say they were all aggressive, although two of them ended up with convictions for domestic violence (these were not boyfriends/husbands of mine, but of family members and friends and a couple were bosses).
Most of the ones that come immediately to mind were verbally abusive, manipulative and a couple were outright snake charmers who were able to complete destroy their partner’s self-worth by constantly belittling them and even worse do the same to their kids. All of them were liars, but a few were so ‘charming’ that their abuse was not easily discernible for most people.
The bosses would try to profile themselves on the backs of their employees, meaning they’d present ideas by the team as their own to superiors, and put blame for their own mistakes onto people on the lower rungs.
Like I said I’m sure there are wonderful short guys out there but from my personal sample, I’d have to say thank you, but no thank you.
(Caveat, I’ve naturally seen such behavior not only by short guys, and I readily believe that my sample does not represent all short men, but every single short guy that came to my notice over the last 38 years had some issues; whether they all had to do with their height is naturally open to discussion, but that’s what they all had in common and more often than not it seemed they were operating from a deep seated feeling of inferiority.)
Inez Kelley said on 07.05.09 at 09:03 PM • [link]
I just like watching this one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5X1wbeBeBx4
Christine said on 07.05.09 at 10:01 PM • [link]
This was good for a laugh! Somebody has serious time on their hands!
It is a shame that most of the Hollywood guys come in small stature. They may be buff, but they sure aren’t big. I think I weigh more than any of the actors represented and I am no where near the size of a professional wrestler, which is more in keeping with the size of the Brotherhood guys.
Also, come on, you couldn’t come up with a bigger Irish guy than Colin to play Butch! I’m insulted on behalf of all the big strapping Irish guys in Southie!
Suze said on 07.06.09 at 02:24 AM • [link]
I’m finding this short vs. tall conversation quite interesting. I never met an adult male shorter than I am until I was well into my twenties (I’m 5’6”), and it have to say that being able to look down on the top of a man’s head when he’s standing next to me creeps me out. It feels wrong and unnatural.
And I have met a lot of short men with Napoleon complexes, but also a lot of short men who don’t seem to have those issues. And a lot of tall men who are just assholes. A lot of men in general who are just assholes… (Any male under 6’ is short to me. I come from a long line of nordic freaks. I am by FAR the shortest adult in my gene pool, male or female.)
And about that video: No. Just, no. Spike, as tortured? Sure, technically, but it didn’t define his character. And I didn’t see that particular Blade movie, either, but I just can’t put Ryan Reynolds into a tough-guy role. He’s a goof-ball, start to finish.
Bonnie said on 07.06.09 at 03:02 AM • [link]
Yeah, the short and tall thing… there is plenty of assholishness to go around. I’m met many a tall man with the “Napoleon Complex”, as well. Meaning aggressive unprovoked anger or whatever. It’s really not right or fair to label people that way.
That said…. I love me a really tall drink of water. Reooooooowwwwww….
Bonnie said on 07.06.09 at 03:03 AM • [link]
I’ve, I meant I’ve! Not “I’m”. :/
Camille said on 07.06.09 at 03:38 AM • [link]
Sorry. Can’t stop laughing. Frankly none of those guys match the picture I had in my head. I love them all. Hugh is my baby. Marsden ...love him… Brad ? Yummy. But the BROTHAS they are not :))
Susan D. said on 07.06.09 at 05:40 AM • [link]
RR is hot. So is Jason Lewis. But, IMHO, they are NOT right for the BDD. Guess I always pictured them looking more like sports players (dirty, sweaty ones) than movie stars.
more like these guys:
http://soccernet.espn.go.com/players/profile?id=122542&cc=5901
or
http://soccernet.espn.go.com/players/profile?id=22774&cc=5901
or
http://soccernet.espn.go.com/players/profile?id=83928&cc=5901
but with longer hair and fangs.
Edie said on 07.06.09 at 12:44 PM • [link]
http://image.hotdog.hu/_data/members2/218/533218/images/peter_steele_241.jpg
I third the Peter Steele motion.. lol
Tammy said on 07.06.09 at 04:19 PM • [link]
Crack me up. The biggest giggle of all? The soundtrack by ... Pink! It’s a great song, but I think the Brothers deserve something with a bit more crunch.
Also, I think for beloved/famous/infamous books and characters, you pretty much have to go with unknown actors. These guys just have too much celebrity baggage for me to see them as viable Brothers - in the same way I can’t watch Angelina Jolie act in anything anymore without first wondering a) whether Brad is watching the kids, and b) exactly how much time in the makeup chair it took to cover her tattoos.
Oh my.... said on 07.07.09 at 06:00 AM • [link]
A for effort, an A for effort….
Snort..Z…P and V. Jesus…
Sherry Thomas said on 07.07.09 at 09:03 PM • [link]
Wow, Ryan Reynolds as Vishous. Granted I didn’t know who Ryan Reynolds was when I read V’s story, but can’t….just can’t…..
That said, RR is the hot. And brainy too. And tall. (And has his hands full of Scar Jo’s boobs.) :-)
Kecl said on 07.07.09 at 10:25 PM • [link]
Visually pleasing, yes. But holy-shit-batman, no way, no how.
Having said that, I’d do Ryan Reynolds in a heartbeat, especially when he’s all sweaty and musckly and beat-up (sorry, hon).
And for the record, Buffy should’ve chosen Spike because he loved her without his soul and Angel only loved her when he had his. Remember that season when he was an ass ‘til he got it back? Oh wow, I’ve been holding on to that one for a lonnnnnnnng while.
MzSpell said on 07.08.09 at 05:54 PM • [link]
Now I loves me some Spike, and Hugh Jackman and Ryan Reynolds definitely trip my hot-o-meter, but can I picture them as Brotherz? A universe of no.
Oh, and what Susan D. said - THOSE guys are more my image of the Brothers…sweaty, dirty, looking like they’ve been rode hard and will put you away wet…‘scuse me, I’ll be in my bunk.
P.S. Excuse me, spamword nearly62, but 34 is nowhere near 62 so stop trying to freak me out about my upcoming birthday. Thank you.
Serena said on 07.09.09 at 12:43 AM • [link]
Spike would have made a great romance hero a couple of decades ago, you know, with the attempted rape and everything.
Jamie said on 07.15.09 at 03:11 AM • [link]
Oh, wow. That was totally lulz-worthy. I think whoever made that video said “ooh, if someone was in something vaguely vamp-related (or if they were pretty), than they are TOTALLY right for the brothers!!!!!” Spike is great but he does not in ANY way resemble Zsadist. In fact, none of the men in that video even remotely resembled in any way my visions of the brothers. However, it was a lot of pretty in just under three minutes (Hugh Jackman, Ryan Reynolds, and James Marsters in one spot? Yes, please!), so I think the horny part of my brain has mostly overtaken the bit that objects to the egregious miscasting.
SEO San Diego said on 07.16.09 at 01:43 AM • [link]
Ferrell is short? Umm… they are ALL short. :) That’s the only saving grace for us non-actors. Our wives (we hope) would think he’s too short! :) If that’s not realistic, well that’s okay… I reject reality anyway.
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