Smart Bitches, Trashy Books

Top 10 Highlights of the RT Booksigning

1. Alyssa Day brought me bosom cookies. There is nothing better than sugar and baked goods in homage to bosoms. Thank you! And Barb Ferrer made the trip for the day just to say howdy to me and to her buddies.

2. So many people stopped to meet me, which made me incredibly happy.

Side Note: a very kind person stopped me while I was setting up my computer at Mr. Romance and said, “I know this is rude, but I wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your web site.” Please know: NOT RUDE! AWESOME! I’m often moving very fast or running my mouth at conferences like these, but please know that if you want to meet me, please introduce yourself. I love to meet the people who visit Smart Bitches, especially the lurkers. I’m a lurker just about everywhere else.

3. Jaye Wells and Sophia White were marvelous people to sit next to. Between them and Michelle Monkou at the Boonsboro signing, I have been tremendously fortunate in my table neighbors at book signings.

Mr. Romance and Academia

If you read the Twitteration, you probably got a micro-sense of the Mr. Romance pageant last night. Heather Osborn calls it the mangeant, and clocking in at just under an hour, it was a zippy-mangeant, too. The battery on my laptop hadn’t charged all the way yet.

The opening was funny and silly and sort of slapstick - a lady was reading a book, and the contestants come out from backstage one by one and dance with her. While they were all sculpted and earnest about it, she was hamming it up to the audience, laughing and giving about 42 variations of the “WTF!?!” face. Then, she returned to her book and her sofa, and her “husband” came home—at which time she threw the book down and dragged him backstage.

Silly, and plays on sexual stereotypes of romance that we wish weren’t the ONLY thing for which romance is mentioned, but the contrast of Uber Earnest Chiseled-Jaw Model Type and the well-dressed and attractive reader hamming her reactions for the audience was snort-funny.

Thursday

After a night of dueling pianos and a very late bedtime, Jane and I headed over to the Wyndham Convention Center this mornign under the impression that our panel on blogging was at 230 pm. In fact, I booked the flight to Princeton based on the idea that I wouldn’t be able to leave until after 5pm. Imagine my shock when, at 11:10 I received a text from Jane saying, “Our session is at 11:30am.” It was at 11:30 on the scheduled card in our registration, too, and I hadn’t noticed. DOH.

I was being interviewed by a holy crapping smart sociology PhD student named Andrea (don’t know if she’d like me to use her surname so I won’t) who is working on a research study about romance. Specifically, and I didn’t find out until after I’d answered all the questions so as not to skew my answers, she’s looking at the intersection of the creators, consumers, and product of the romance genre (i.e. authors, readers, and the book itself) and the social community constructed therein. Nothing to talk about there, huh?

Wednesday

What, it’s 1:30 in the morning so technically it’s Thursday, and that’s about as inspirational a title as you’ll get. Jane and I are eating M&Ms and drinking water after a loud and danceful evening of piano bars, tequila, beer, and really, really loud music. My ears are going to ring until Sunday.

Jane and I made it over to the conference center today around breakfast time, and even though this is my second RT, I was surprised by how many people I recognized and how many people recognized me. I saw Beth Ciotta (whose hair looks fabulous) when we were registering, and she’s co-hosting the Mr. Romance competition. According to Roxanne St. Claire, this is a good thing, as Ciotta is holy shit funny. Now I’m totally looking forward to it.

But Wait, There’s More Conferences!

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned the epic clusterfuck of travel I have going on this week, but in case you’re curious, here we go. Presently I’m at Romantic Times in Orlando, where today I’m on a panel about historical romance with Jane. Then, this afternoon I’m on a panel about social networking and new media with Ron Hogan. That will be so difficult, since there’s really nothing about Twitter or the growing power of using a social network to reach consumers (*koff koff Dominos *koff koff Amazon) that we can talk about in terms of author promotion.

Then tomorrow Jane and I are on another panel about blogging. Don’t know what we’re going to find to talk about there. This is the panel at which hecklers promised to show themselves. I have two cameras in my bag for that reason.

After the blogging-stravaganza, I head to the airport where I fly back up to Jersey to attend the Princeton Romance Conference where I’m on the closing plenary panel. So in the middle of the RT reporting with the cover models and the costumes and the discussions of urban fantasy and the presence of leather camisoles, I’ll switch… read more »

RT Conference Wrap Up

Back during the month of nonstop Jewish holidays where there was one right after the other in the middle of the week and I was running from one function to another family dinner and gaining about 5769 lbs to greet the new year, I was asked by Morgan from Miss Media Productions to do an interview about RT. I think I was the last one to participate after just about everyone else had done their segments, and Morgan was nice enough to make room for me in her schedule.

Lo and behold, right after the intro, I’m the lead off hitter. I’m totally not a lead off kinda gal. I’m more of a third string catcher. (I’d say the designated hitter, but the DH is lamesauce). Either way - thanks, Morgan!

RT Convention 2008 Wrap Up from Romantic Times BOOKreviews on Vimeo.

Mr. Romanc and Rom-Com Marital Damage

You know the Mr. Romance pageant at RT? The one I missed because I had to leave early to eat the bread of oppression last year?

Variety is reporting that a comedy is in the works about “a cynical guy who is forced to enter the Mr. Romance competition to win back the love of his life. The competition, which finds hunks whose photos grace the bodice-ripping covers of romance novels, is a real event.”

Oh, boy. This can’t end well.

Romantic Times: The Documentary

Anyone want to check out a documentary film premiere at the Cut Film Festival in San Diego next spring? Novice filmmakers Cindi Finneran and Charley Reeves are premiering their documentary Reading, Riting, and Romance: Taming the Alpha Male, which examines the Romantic Times convention through footage of the 2007 convention and interviews with the attendees.

The documentary came about when Sharon Sala, who works with Finneran, suggested they “team up and document [the] convention,” and off they went.

There’s a 4 minute teaser video on YouTube featuring Kathryn Falk, conference attendees, and several of the ‘07 Mr. Romance contestants:

I’m really curious about this documentary, and I’m of three minds about what the trailer seems to indicate.

And Now… Another Chapter in Tales of Bestselling Authors Behaving Like Rational Grownups

And what in my magical inbox should appear, but Christine Feehan, and eight tiny reindeer of rational prose. Ok, no reindeer, but prose? Got it:

The story as I know it:

The camera did in fact belong to me, not my daughter.  Heather and I are friends and have been for many years.  I’m old and body part photos don’t really work so well for me as a joke and I was concerned that perhaps someone else might post the pictures on the internet.  No, my son never saw the pictures, the ones he saw were of our home so he knew the camera was mine.  He knew the camera was mine and never would have left them there for me to see as he knows what an old fashioned woman I am.  The girls apologized and that should have ended it.  The police were never called.  There were no tears by anyone I know of.  I’m pretty certain all the fictional accounts are far better than anything either Heather or I could have written but it was fun to read them all.

No tears, no police, no drama? ARMPITS?! That’s it? Funny how rational grownup behavior is so very… read more »

Carpathian Fire Queens, Next on Oprah

Heather Graham contacted me regarding the great “What What In My Camera” debate with the following statement:

The story as I know it . . . .

A bartender had a camera and insisted, as the bar was closing, that someone there take it, as he knew it belonged to our group. (Of hundreds.) Some of the kids—assorted kids, as in children of participants, models, not “camps!”—took silly pictures of armpits. Someone had discovered that close-ups of pressed pits resembled other body parts. The pictures were in bad taste, but then, again, it is a convention where we do have erotica, chocolate penises, ribbed, scented, and neon colored condoms, I don’t suppose one can condemn them too harshly for thinking that armpit pictures that looked like more sexual zones were very funny.

They were then with a member of the family who owned the camera, a member of the family who saw the pictures and laughed as well, then realized that the camera belonged to his family. Everyone thought great, we know who owns the camera. Why they didn’t erase the pictures then, I’m not sure, except that they had just showed them to the owner’s brother. They were… read more »

More Blind and Not-So-Blind Items

A certain pub of the vowel variety was seen approaching one of their former authors, now a big double-diamond star in her own right for another publishing house. Despite proclamations that said author was persona non grata at their house since she departed, the pub rep present at RT was begging said author for a few books - e-rights only, no need to worry about that printy type business. Things must be rotten in Denmark for begging to supercede earlier vilification.

Meanwhile, a number of authors from one ePub had a marvelous time at the party of another ePub, even though in previous years, the first had drawn virtual barbed wire fences around their authors to prevent fraternizing (or sororitizing?) with the other group. And yet, when the grown ups got to socialize, a good time was had by all.

However, a good time was not had by every single attendee. From the RT Police blotter, a three-times-the-drama tale of a very pitiable cover model. Seems one of the Misters Romance had a history of instability, and his behavior caused a very big stir most of the weekend. First, he scored the room key card of an RT… read more »

Chag Sameach and Thank you

Yesterday I went from wings and chiffon and a line for the breakfast buffet that was 1400 people long, to a dinner table for 1400 with matzo and wine and references to oppression and an obligation to recline and relax and celebrate. As I was sitting at the longest damn table I’ve ever seen, it occurred to me - seder is one hell of an effort for my inlaws, and that effort is one reason why I left RT early and rushed home to then travel upstate for Passover dinner. That effort, and my acknowledging that effort, is important, and worth - almost - missing the opportunity to have Fabio graze MY left boob (scroll down on the right).

The same can be said of RT. A convention of that size is definitely the results of many, many sleepless hours on the part of the convention staff, from the people who stuffed bags at the last minute to those who opened the doors a bit early so people who were disabled could find a seat nearer to the doors. Someone was hanging that purple sparkly fabric all over the room, and the person who took that effort made the… read more »

I can has pictures? You can has pictures!

I have finally been reunited with my full size keyboard and laptop and I have uploaded the photos I snapped at RT. Alas, I was sporting the little camera, which doesn’t take the really hot photos, so some are grainy due to poor lighting or bad flash. I will endeavor to bring a more beefy and appropriate camera in future efforts, because DAMN was there a lot to photograph.

Behold, the gallery of photos. Enjoy.

Blind Items from RT

A few not entirely blind items:

Rumor has it EC Cavemen behaved like cavemen, with the exception of a gentleman who lived up to that term by the name of Rodney. At least three authors that I know of resorted to physical response to their grabby tactics – a physical response that involved a slap and no tickle. As of Friday evening, no cavemen in sight – they seem to have suddenly and mysteriously disappeared. At least, they’re not wearing their official EC gear and traveling in a pack, and the EC staff seem to have departed as well.

And speaking of EC, a few other authors reported that editors were apt to shoot down EC writers’ careers at point blank range by saying to the author’s faces that their careers had entered rigor mortis with no hope of recovery.

Using Historical Facts Without Crossing the Line into Plagiarism

Jennifer Blake, Roberta Gellis, and Bertrice Small led a session that, unlike many of the fan-friendly sessions, was silent, with notetaking, serious faces, and a great deal of attention. Their session, in a word, was outstanding. My notes are below, which don’t really follow a well-transitioned structure (or any structure for that matter) but let me tell you – these ladies rocked this session like damn and whoa.

Roberta Gellis provided a point by point explanation of copyright law in the US. A few facts to chew over:

Until 1978 individual states determined their own copyright law, and since then copyright has been under federal jurisdiction. Ideas cannot be copyright – only the way you express the idea. Copyright provides the right to do and to authorize others to do the following: Reproduce copies, prepare derivative works – e.g. you can authorize Fanfic if you choose - distribute copies by sale, etc.

Roberta Gellis then led a discussion about how to use research material: “I’ve never copied anything from any research book of mine because they’re so deadly dull!”