Smart Bitches, Trashy Books

RITA Reader Challenge: The Danger of Desire by Elizabeth Essex

This review was written by Katherine This story was nominated in the Best Historical Romance category.

The summary: Captain Hugh McAlden is working on a top-secret mission to bring down enemy spies living in England. After seeing a young woman perform a brilliant bit of pick pocketing on the London streets, he impulsively decides to hire her to help him. The only name she'll give him is Meggs, and she refuses to tell him anything about her background or how she ended up on the streets. But as Hugh tries to unravel her secrets, he also finds her harder and harder to resist...

And here is Katherine's review:

This could have been a really good book, instead of just a better than average book.  It coulda been a...oh wait, it is a contender.  Who's responsible for making these nominations, anyway, and what are they drinking? Still, I liked Danger of Desire enough to read the previous book in the series, Pursuit of Pleasure, which as it happens was a… read more »

RITA Reader Challenge: How a Cowboy Stole Her Heart by Donna Alward

This review was written by Lindlee. This story was nominated in the Best Contemporary Series Romance category.

The summary: Clay Gregory's known Megan Briggs her whole life, and he's been plenty worried about her while she's been getting medical treatment. Now she's back home and hiding away on the family ranch. Knowing the stubborn cowgirl won't accept his help willingly, he invites her to a family wedding to help him avoid his aunt's matchmaking! He plans to remind Meg she's still the girl who can beat him in a horse race! But as she steps out in her curve-hugging red dress, her skills on a horse are suddenly the furthest thing from his mind….  

And here is Lindlee's review:

How a Cowboy Stole Her Heart starts when Megan returns home after going into remission from breast cancer. She lived in Calgary, a few hours away from home, while she was undergoing treatment. Coming back is difficult, but it is during this time that Clay and Megan’s friendship turns… read more »

RITA Reader Challenge: Doukakis’s Apprentice by Sarah Morgan

This review was written by Jenny D. This story was nominated in the Best Contemporary Series Romance category.

The summary: With her family business in crisis, Polly Prince does her best to keep calm and carry on. But hard work alone can't save her London company from a takeover by the infamously ruthless Damon Doukakis…or her traitorous body from the lethal sensuality of her boss! As his new apprentice, Polly accompanies Damon to Paris to negotiate the most challenging business deal of her life! Worse still, Polly must at all costs resist Damon in the most dangerously romantic city in the world.…

And here is Jenny's review:

A Review of Sarah Morgan’s Doukakis’s Apprentice in 250 Words Even Though That’s a Really Tiny Amount of Words

Let’s get the bad things out of the way up front:

Bad Thing #1: The title. Seriously. Is it a rule that all HPs have absurd titles that don’t match the plot?

RITA Reader Challenge: Compassion Can’t Wait by Carly Phillips

This review was written by Phyllis. This story was nominated in the Best Romance Novella category.

The summary: In Carly Phillips's Compassion Can't Wait, two high school sweet hearts are reunited years later, as if by fate, and discover that if you believe in yourself and each other, anything is possible.

And here is Phyllis' review:

This is a nice, sexy story of old flames reunited.

As a kindness to a teenage boy whose brother's suffering from advanced leukemia, the heroine, a hospital social worker, contacts her ex-boyfriend, now a star baseball pitcher, to meet the boy.

Beguiling the Beauty by Sherry Thomas - a guest review by CarrieS

Beguiling the Beauty is a late Victorian era romance that meets my geek criteria because of its use of science, specifically the study of fossils and the rise of evolutionary biology.  My husband is an evolutionary biologist, so needless to say I was thrilled when I found out that Sherry Thomas' new book has an evolutionary biologist hero.  I'm a huge Sherry Thomas fan and this book did not disappoint.  In fact, it is by far my favorite book of hers, in no small part because it features the line, "Thank you for dinner.  And thank you for the pleasure of the tetrapodichnites".

I'm trying to avoid gratuitous spoilers, but if you are super spoiler-phobic, you should stop reading this review and just start reading the book.  It's great and you'll love it.  For the rest of you, MILD SPOILERS AHEAD:

Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex by Mary Roach - A Guest Review by CarrieS

If you loved Sarah's post entitled, "Where is the Hymen?" you will love Bonk.

In Bonk (which for months I've been referring to accidentally as Boink, God knows what that says about me) Mary Roach takes on the subject of what scientists do and don't know about sex, and how they know it.  I apologize for the over-abundance of long quotes here, but they are the best way to convey the flavor of the book.  Also, I'm being self-indulgent.  I read most of this book in a hospital cafeteria (Mom had a hip replacement - she's all better now).  Anyway, there I was, cackling madly over the cafeteria food, with no one to say, "Hey, you gotta hear this!" to.  I certainly wasn't going to read these passages to my mother (although given the pain medication she was getting at the time, I doubt she would have been offended).  Here's an excerpt I'm fond of from the chapter, "The Prescription-Strength Vibrator:  Masturbating For Health":

RITA Reader Challenge: Resolution by Linda Winstead Jones in The Heart of Winter

This review was written by Phyllis Laatsch. This novella was nominated in the "Best Romance Novella" category. 

The summary: When law secretary Nell Rose is snowbound with a handsome stranger, keeping her New Year's Resolution becomes nearly impossible. Why swear off men when a romantic weekend with a reclusive writer seems to be the ideal way to ring in the new year?

And here is Phyllis' review: 

A legal secretary gets stuck in a ditch in a snowstorm on New Year's Eve, just as she's making resolutions to avoid men, go back to school, etc. She trudges up to an isolated house and is let in by a famous author, who can't figure out if she's the stalker who's been sending him crazy letters.

The sparks between the hero and heroine were amazing. They really got each other, though they didn't want the same things out of life in the beginning. They acted on the attraction awfully quickly, especially since the heroine had just sworn off men. And yet,… read more »

The Last Night by Nico Rosso - a Guest Review from Carrie S

Some people want scientific explanations for everything in fiction.  I'm not one of them.  Frankly, I prefer it if we never know why the zombies walk the earth, or how the Force works, but if the author feels he or she simply must try to explain the science of what's happening, I'll usually accept it and move on.  You can get away with a lot of bad science and as long as the characters are compelling, I don't care.  But people, this was just too much.

The premise of The Last Night, insofar as I understood it in one reading, is that a chain of devastating earthquakes worldwide destroyed all the cities.  The earthquakes, and volcanic activities, still rumble every few days.  All this seismic activity churned up the soil and unleashed previously buried microbes that infected people, turning them into "ashers".  Ashers have skin (and possibly internal organs - I wasn't clear on this) that has turned to stone (or a stone-like substance).  They have the mindless persistence of standard zombies but they can feel fear… read more »

Silver Surrender by Vivian Vaughan - A Guest Review by RedHeadedGirl

This is the first in a series of four books, and I think this is a good example of decent western romances (which I promised after the Scoundrel’s Captive debacle), and an author making the effort (and succeeding!) at not writing the same book over and over and over again (Dan Brown: take notes) (I do rag on Dan Brown a lot, don’t I?) (HE DESERVES IT).

So this series is about the Jarrett siblings- Texans all (why is it always Texas?) and great lays- except for the oldest brother.  Because he is the parental figure that raised the rest of ‘em and as we all know, parents do not have great sex.

….

Anyway, I read the first one back in my misspent youth, Silver Surrender, and always had this niggling feeling that there were clearly MORE, so when I started this venture, I found the rest of them.  And they are my very favoritist type of bubblegum reads.  Crazy, but not too crazy, likable characters, high adventure, hot sex, FANTASTIC CLOTHES.

(I’m… read more »

RITA Reader Challenge: “The Storm Within” from A Royal Engagement, by Trish Morey

This review was submitted by Qualisign, and get ready, for it is majestic. This novella was nominated in the Romance Novella category.

The summary: Dr. Grace Hunter seeks an ancient text beneath the castle of Count Alessandro Volta.

The reclusive count wasn't expecting scientist Grace to be a beautiful woman who stirs his scarred soul. Outside, a media storm is brewing, but inside the count's world the heat between them is sizzling!

And now, Qualisign's review:

Alternate title cum synopsis: “How a scar(r)y Count Count was possessed by the Cookie Monster only to be exorcized by a fame-seeking scientifically-minded Sunshine Bear with scraped-back hair” Seriously. This was horrible. And I paid for it – just so that I could review it for SBTB. AAARRRGGGHHH! It has such promise: a long-lost manuscript containing healing secrets-of-the-ages, a PhD-carrying-manuscript-curator of a heroine, a wounded hero with a title and a castle on an island with secret tunnels, caves and wicked storms. It was SO good – until I… read more »

RITA Reader Challenge: New York to Dallas by JD Robb

This RITA Reader Challenge review comes from Silver James. This book is nominated in the Romantic Suspense category.

The summary: The number-one New York Times-bestselling author J. D. Robb presents an intense and terrifying new case for New York homicide cop Eve Dallas, one that will take her all the way to the city that gave her her name-and plunge her into the nightmares of her childhood.

When a monster named Isaac McQueen-taken down by Eve back in her uniform days-escapes from Rikers, he has two things in mind. One is to pick up where he left off, abducting young victims and leaving them scarred in both mind and body. The other is to get revenge on the woman who stopped him all those years ago.

Normally I'd post reviews books that haven't been mentioned yet, but Silver's review really spoke to me and I wanted to share it. Here is Silver's review: 

Jane Eyre Vs Wuthering Heights Smackdown - A Guest Entry by CarrieS

This guest entry from CarrieS is in honor of Charlotte Bronte's birthday, which was last weekend, 21 April. 

OK, Bitches, this is it.  In honor of Charlotte Brontë's birthday (April 21, 1816), it's time to fulfill my long-time goal of establishing what I believe may be a universal truth:

You cannot passionately, deeply, own-multiple-copies-of, take-to-a-desert-island-as-your-one-book, love both Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights.  Love one, hate the other.  That's the deal.  You may appreciate the quality of the writing in both books and their historical significance, but on a visceral level you will love only one.

How have I come to this conclusion?  Well, to start with, I currently own at least three copies of Jane Eyre, one of which is wrapped in plastic and stored with my earthquake survival kit (along with a copy of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, in case you're wondering.).  Jane is my role model, my friend, my faithful companion and guiding light.  On the other hand, I've read Wuthering Heights three times out of a perverse sense of duty to Literature, and I… read more »

RITA Reader Challenge: The Many Sins of Lord Cameron by Jennifer Ashley

 This RITA Reader Challenge review was written by Jenn. This book is nominated in the Best Historical Romance category.

The summary: Cameron Mackenzie is a man who loves only horses and women - in that order - or so his mistresses say.

Ainsley Douglas is a woman with a strong sense of justice and the desire to help others - even if that means sneaking around a rakish man's bedchamber.

Which is exactly where Cam finds her - six years after he caught her the first time. Only then, she convinced Cam she was seeking a liaison, but couldn't go through with it because of her husband. Now a widow, she's on a mission to retrieve letters that could prove embarrassing to the queen. Cam has no interest in Ainsley's subterfuge, but he vows to finish what they started those many years ago. One game, one kiss at a time, he plans to seduce her. And what starts out as a lusty diversion may… read more »

RITA Reader Challenge: Flawless by Lara Chapman

This RITA Reader Challenge review is from Kristi Davis. This book is nominated in the "Best YA Romance" category for the RITAs this year. 

The summary: Sarah Burke is just about perfect. She's got killer blue eyes, gorgeous blond hair, and impeccable grades. There's just one tiny-all right, enormous-flaw: her nose. But even that's not so bad. Sarah's got the best best friend and big goals for print journalism fame.

On the first day of senior year, Rock Conway walks into her journalism class and, well, rocks her world. Problem is, her best friend, Kristen, falls for him too. And when Rock and Kristen stand together, it's like Barbie and Ken come to life. So when Kristen begs Sarah to help her nab Rock, Sarah does the only thing a best friend can do-she agrees. For someone so smart, what was she thinking? 

And here is Kristi's review:  

A Little Night Magic by Lucy March - A Guest Review by Betty Fokker

 Betty Fokker wrote a guest review of Lucy March's "A Little Night Magic," and I wanted to share it with you.

must make with the confession. I am an Internet-Pal of Lucy March/Lani Diane Rich. It is like being a real-life friend, except we’ve never gotten drunk and talked each other into getting a Tramp Stamp of jumping dolphins at 3:00 AM. (Not that this has happened to me.) This means that I am not without favorable bias when I read her work.

However, my mild mannered mundane self is an academic, and I swore on a Roget’s Thesaurus that all literary reviews would contain some criticism. The penalties for “failing to critique” are harsh. You have to watch Jaws IV without commenting on the plot holes or bad special effects, and you are accused of having written a “hagiography” about an author. You’ll go to academic conferences and someone will have scrawled “hagiographer” across your place card in red marker. No one will sit with you at lunch. It gets real ugly, real fast.

A Little Night Magic is Lani Diane Rich’s first offering… read more »