Smart Bitches, Trashy Books

Spicy Sweet Potato Latkes, Smart Bitch Style

First, "The Latke Who Wouldn't Stop Screaming," by Lemony Snicket, is an awesome and hilarious book. You will enjoy, guilt free.

Second, I've talked about the Spicy Sweet Potato Latke recipe on Twitter, and folks have been asking me for it, so rather than email it, I'll post it here. 

It's yummy. It's spicy. It's Hanukkah tonight, so grab some oil and fry things with glee. Happy Hanukkah y'all. 

Net Neutrality: The Internet Strikes Back

I’m taking a break from your regularly scheduled discussion of all things Man-Titty and Romance to participate in The Internet Strikes Back which focuses on Net Neutrality.

For those of you not in the US, or in the US and not sure what the hell I’m talking about, Net Neutrality is about allowing internet users the same speed and level of connection across devices, hardware, and method of connection. If Net Neutrality were not in effect, Verizon, for example, my internet service provider, could give me faster connective speeds to it’s sponsored sites and block access to sites it doesn’t want me to see. Moreover, it could block my access to competitors or sites it doesn’t like me to use.

In other words, without Net Neutrality, my complaints about AT&T wireless coverage will look like a love song compared to complaints about access limitations imposed by ISPs. You could, if someone decided my site was not ok for the general populace, be blocked by your ISP from this site, or have the connection be so slow you give up, though that’s a bit… read more »

Happy Sixth Anniversary, All You Smart Bitches!

Today marks the Sixth Anniversary of this here hot pink website. Our first review was posted January 30, 2005 - a review of Sharon Shinn’s Angel-Seeker. Wow, huh? I’m sort of shocked and amazed and ready to party!

The official gifts of the Sixth Anniversary are… wait, don’t have anything liquid in your mouth, ok? … iron, candy, and WOOD.

Oh, this is going to be fun. It’s giveaway time! To celebrate our sixth anniversary, I’m giving away the following prizes:

That’s 4lbs of chocolate covered cherries, an iron, a 5lb bag of wood, and a Hello Kitty vibrator (a much better substitute for the wood, because it’s woody-like).

All you have to do is leave a comment and tell me six things you love about reading romance novels, and you’re entered to win. Standard disclaimers apply. Void where prohibited by law. I ship internationally when possible. Take your shoes off. Wash your hands. Any resemblance to iron wood made of candy is completely coincidental. No chocolate was harmed… read more »

What I Meant Was…

Gotta love it when I stick my foot in my mouth!

Last night I did an interview with 744 ABC Melbourne about erotic fan fiction.

During the interview with Alan Brough, he asked me about why erotic fan fiction so often pairs two characters of the same gender. What I meant to say was that in most countries, popular culture reveals a general discomfort with homosexuality, and that frank portrayals of homosexuality are not common.

What I said was that “most people in the world are uncomfortable with homosexuality.”

Clearly, these are not the same things.

Yes. Everyone in the world is uncomfortable with homosexuality. Except me, and a lot of other people, and wow, did I not say that correctly. While I was talking live to a whole lot of Australians. Nervousness, I am victim of it.

Seriously, can I communicate my own embarrassment as well as I communicate my alleged homophobia? I feel like I need to apologize to everyone on the planet for sticking my foot in my mouth.

Oh, well. As the lovely Maureen Johnson said at one point, “Own your mistakes. They are yours.” This mistake is all mine and it’s a… read more »

Review: My Droid X (Is Smaller Than My Adidas)

Ahoy there! Ahead be some discussion of reading, but mostly my impressions of my new phone. For those who come here for romance, nothing but romance, and a side order of man-titty, this entry will be not so much of that, unless I download some man-porn apps, which I can do because I’m outside the limitations of the Apple App Store. Heh. I have, yes, already searched “porn” in the Droid Marketplace, aka, Droid App Store.

If you know me, or have been around me, or read what I say on Twitter every now and again, you know that I hate, loathe, abhor, and despise very few things. I hate emptying the sink trip while I’m cooking. I loathe clothing that itches and the feeling of foam against my skin (EW. JIBBLIES.). And I abhor AT&T Wireless. Two years ago I signed a two-year contract with AT&T and got the iPhone 3G. The iPhone is a wonderful device for texting and email and all kinds of activities and whatnot, but as a phone, it sucks out loud, long, strong, and forever. It is a horrible phone because AT&T in the NY Metro area (which includes New York City, southern… read more »

Links - You Know You Want Some

First, things happen when Zoe Archer shops Etsy. I don’t know if these are GOOD things but things definitely happen. Like Purssy clutches. Archer thinks this is a great place to store tampons. (SNRK.)

From Billie, this absolutely hilarious report on Microsoft’s latest patent application for a virtual page turn gesture.

I honestly don’t get page turn animations, and think they are a waste of time, but patenting the gesture?

BIllie points out that the bootnote is the very best part (a close second is my opportunity to use the word ‘bootnote’):

Bootnote

We would be remiss if we didn’t credit Microsoft with one intriguing detail in the 11-page patent application. In discussing input methods, the filing notes that “sources other than fingers may be used to execute a page-turning gesture.” We’ll simply leave the implications of that capability to your imagination.

This is, for the record, the second most bizarre gesture I’ve seen. The most bizarre? The Pepsi Summer Chillout Gesture.

Diana sent me this strangely compelling and yet depressing link: Handsome Men Who Are Now Dead. Langston Hughes? Oh, rwor.

And finally, an article that is worth pondering from Salon: an interview with Clay Shirky,… read more »

The Reader’s Place in Publishing

Next week I have a TON of travel coming up. First, I’ll be at RomCon in Denver, CO, and if you’re going to be there, I hope you’ll introduce yourself to me. I’m the one with glasses. And I’m usually pretty loud.

Then, immediately afterward, I’m going to be in Vancouver, BC, Canada, at Simon Fraser University’s Summer Publishing Workshops giving a keynote address and leading a one-day seminar on Romance Novels.

The keynote is focused on “The Reader’s Place in the Publishing Process,” and I’ve got an hour. Think I can squeeze it all in?!  (PUN TOTALLY INTENDED.)

I am going to focus on where I think the reader’s place is right now in the eyes of the publishing industry, and where I think the reader’s place could be now and in the future. I’m going to touch on the other individuals in the publishing process (the publisher, the writer and her agent, the book seller) and the repeated absence of the reader in conversations and examinations of publishing.

Much like that motivational story about everybody, nobody, and somebody, everybody in publishing agrees the reader is important, but it’s somebody else’s job to figure out the… read more »

Covers & Libraries

First: Sony Pocket has a new bundle with case that made me ponder. For $169 you get a Sony Pocket with a special leather cover branded with “Eat Pray Love” and “a code for eBook downloads of Eat, Pray, Love and Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert.”

Now, I am all for nice digital reader covers, though Elizabeth Gilbert’s book drove me up a wall and across the ceiling. I thought the paperback might have been retitled as “My Navel: Let Me Gaze At It.” So I don’t necessarily want to cover a Sony Pocket with a leather cover devoted to that book.

But would you want a digital reader cover customized to look like or embossed with the title of one of your all-time favorite books? Or do you prefer basic covers? I mean, half the fun of owning electronics is accessorizing, right?

More in Sony news: as one of the few, if not the only digital reader firm that focuses on library lending, Sony has unveiled the Reader Library program to support public libraries.

The Reader Library program will offer, according to Paul Biba’s report on TeleRead, a training program developed by Sony that will instruct librarians on… read more »

Untethered: The Wrap Up and Drinking Game

Thursday 17 June I attended The Big Money’s “Untethered” conference, all about publishing in the tablet era (0_o). As predicted, it was high in unintentional comedy, with some sessions that I hope are made available online for their unparalleled awesomeness. Be warned: this entry is HELLA LONG but the sections about NPR (awesome) and the device panel where folks were dismissive of the consumer who asked a question about ebook pricing (me) are probably the juicy parts if you want to skip ahead.

Don Graham, CEO of Washington Post, began the sessions by speaking from the perspective of a reader - I have to wonder if being the reader is like establishing street cred. Sadly, I don’t think enough of the reader perspective was prevalent in the sessions that followed, though I appreciated Graham’s impressions of his own perspective.

Graham was an early adopter of the Kindle: “I’ve been reading all my life, and I developed a set of prejudices and preferences I didn’t fully understand. With the Kindle, I noticed what the same, and what was different.”

Note: no one from Amazon was present, and neither was anyone from Apple. So to begin a conference discussing the… read more »

Bonus Video: Hoff Flag Day!

Beth sent me this link, because it is full of Hoffness. So much Hoffness, I find myself pledging allegiance to his Hoffness, and the united state of his pectorals.

Many, many alert readers have notified me that Comedy Central plans to roast the Hoff in August - which is alarming, because the Hoff’s general state is a nice toasty golden brown. Roast him?! He might burn!

Wear sunscreen, Hoffmeister, and I’ll salute you any time!

Untethered (I Hope)

If all goes well, tomorrow I will be attending Big Money’s Untethered conference, all about publishing on tablet media. I haven’t received a registration confirmation despite being a media partner, woe is I.

I think (I hope anyway) that they’re defining “tablet” to its broadest definition to include not only iPads but also smart phones, digital reading devices, and the like, because if it’s all iPad, all day, that’ll get boring in a hurry.

But the focus on publishing should be interesting, particularly since the speakers include Sarah Chubb, CEO of Conde Nast, Brian Murray, the CEO of HarperCollins, and Carolyn Reidy, President and CEO, Simon & Schuster.

The topics will include discussions of newspaper and magazine use of tablet technology, and a session at 11am titled, “Will the iPad Kill Off eReaders and Other Tablets?” with folks from Barnes and Noble’s Digital Products division, IRex (Didn’t they just file for bankruptcy?) Spring Design and Sony Electronics. Good thing I’m not on the panel, because my answer to the title question would be, “Uh, no.” I find reading on the iPad to be visually uncomfortable, but I’m very curious how the conference as a whole approaches the question… read more »

Links That Have Nothing to Do With Romance - But Something to do with Awesome

Here, enjoy some links of NSFW crazy and other random pieces of brilliance. What are you reading online lately?

From Angela James comes The Night In a position from The Snuggie Sutra.

This poor gentleman has upstairs neighbors who are unbelievable. He can hear everything they say, so he writes letters to them. HA. Thanks to Heathero for the link.

And finally, when I’m having a crazy or crappy day, Lovely Listing and IMMD, especially when there’s one about authors.

The State of Mashable Media Summit: Part Deux, With Drinking Game

The afternoon sessions began after a lunch of vegetarian and tuna wraps and sushi, with really good cookies, and really long lines for the free Motorola phone.

Ms. Harman, American Red Cross:

My successes in social media are created in moments of unspeakable tragedy. Social media and the American Red Cross connect people who need help.

The American Red Cross belongs to everyone, because we make up the network that allows communities to help each other.

“We are only as strong as the network that we have.” (S: In this room, we are shit out of luck, then).

They do try to have fun, even though they are engaged in serious pursuit of helping people. Trying to bring stodgy organization into 21st century. They want to change the way people respond to tragedy: giving via text to Haiti, for example.

I sat with the speaker at lunch so I know she’s planning something.

The State of Mashable Media Summit

Today I’m at the Mashable Media Summit, sponsored by Mashable and CNN Tech and a bunch of other folks. On one hand, Mashable is amazing (I just learned from the COO that their traffic has increased four times their 2008 numbers) and on the other…CNN drives me nuts for a whole smorgasboard of reasons. This conference, to be frank, was expensive. I registered early but it was over $400 for the day. A day.

So I’ll be honest: I’m pessimistic. The agenda of speakers is interesting, but I have no idea if this is going to apply to me, and I’m attending as someone who is very curious about social media and who spends a lot of time on Twitter.

Let it be said: executives of internet companies are not always good public speakers. I’m ready to shoot someone if I hear “without further ado” one more freaking time.

“Tell everyone you’re here. Without you being here, this doesn’t happen.” If a tree falls in the woods and no one tweets about it, does it really happen? Because I can’t tell anyone about it if I can’t get online, and neither can anyone in my row. My… read more »

A Perfect Storm of Linky Awesomeness

So much awesome in the inbox, I can’t even tell you.

Lisa sent me the following link to vintage men’s adventure magazines. After looking at the covers, would you rather face down:

- weasels ripping your flesh - cannibal crabs crawling to kill - the red tide of death (Kotex makes something for that, I bet) - a battle with a giant otter - mad monkeys manning the lifeboats - an alligator who won’t give you back your arm - flying rodents ripping your flesh - being chewed to bits by giant turtles

This is a very difficult choice. Think about it.

Zoe Archer sent me this link, which is just layers of WTFery: Christian Audigier Ed Hardy condoms. Say the following with a straight face, I dare you:

Our “Ultra Premium” and “Monsieur Bond Extra Large” are designed with a “Baggy Head” that makes the condoms easier to use….

So please enjoy and thank you!.. for being FURIOUSLY SEXY with Christian Audigier!

Oh, for fuck’s sake.

Finally, Kiersten sent me this movie poster, and OH MY GOSH.

HOFF. Is in a MOVIE. Called DANCING NINJAS.

No,… read more »