Smart Bitches, Trashy Books

What’s In My Bag?

I put my review copy of The Duke of Shadows in my purse this morning, so excited to read it - and hello, Ann Aguirre sent me a link to her review and homage to the book that is SO good I think I need to excuse myself from every other thing I do to go read.

Ann is running a contest to spread the love about the book - so tell, have you read it yet? Is this one of your most-anticipated titles this month?

It’s definitely one of mine. Between this title and The Spymaster’s Lady, we may be looking at a whole new bar of excellence in historical romance.

BIG NEWS

For those of you who don’t know yet, our new front page has big, big news.

Check it out.

What’s your position on Amazon?

Jane wrote a absolutely marvelous post about Amazon’s decision to no longer stock books that do not use Booksurge, Amazon’s print-on-demand service. According to Writer’s Weekly, tomorrow (1 April - April Fools?!) is the deadline by which “some POD publishers to sign the contract with Amazon/Booksurge, or risk having their buy buttons removed from Amazon.com.” (Thanks to Cheryl for the link).

Some publishers who use other POD services, such as Whiskey Creek Press, have noticed that already, prior to that signing deadline, their books are only available through resellers, or via the Kindle edition - a file type which is owned entirely by Amazon.

We here at Bitch HQ use Amazon as referral customers, and we earn about 6.5-7% of all purchases made through our Amazon referral account. We use that money (and money from our advertisers) to cover hosting, prizes, postage, and my regular stalker letter to Fabio, but you didn’t hear me say that. Amazon makes it hideously easy to build a store, build a link, host any number of popup or mouseover windows for additional information about a book, and offers a badrillion different linking options to anyone, like us nefarious bloggers, to use.

Help A Bitch Out: Category Author Sought, Please

Bitchery Reader

Talpianna

Tina! (sorry Tina!) says:

All this thinking about category romances reminded me that there was an author who wrote very unconventional category romances.  By unconventional, I mean, her heroines were not super-gorgeous, perfect creatures just waiting for the right incredibly sexy, handsome, rich stud to notice her and rush her to the alter (after a secret baby or two).  Her protagonists always seemed “real” to me, ie, people that you might actually know or be (so she probably didn’t do category for long, huh?)  I CAN NOT THINK OF HER NAME!!  I’ve tried and tried.  If someone can name the title of the one book plot that I can remember by her, it would help me find her and whatever else she’s written because she was great.

It was set in the Florida Keys, I’m almost sure.  She worked as a bartender.  She had what appeared to the hero to be dyed blond hair with a good inch or two of dark roots showing.  Meanwhile he’s a private investigator who’s getting older and getting pretty tired of following people around to prove they are liars and cheats to whomever has hired him.  He’s carrying a little extra… read more »

Smart Bitch Happy Hour: A Contest!

Contest Ahoy! Get out your minibar bottles and start mixing! Kathleen O’Reilly has sent me a fair pile of her new book, Nightcap and I’m loving my new postage scale like you have no idea. And it’s almost Friday, sort of, so let’s start the Smart Bitch Happy Hour with a contest.

Since the O’Sullivan brothers own a bar, your task, should you choose to accept it, is to create a drink recipe and name it. It doesn’t matter if the drink actually tastes good - so many mixed drinks are made with vodka, which makes me wicked ill, so don’t worry that I’m standing by with a titanium liver and a top shelf bar ready to test-drive your concoctions. Heh. “Concoctions.”

So, bang a gong, it is on. Bring in your best made-up Smart Bitch Happy Hour cocktail (Heh heh. “cocktail.”) and post it in the comments. It doesn’t have to be about sex or screwing or banging a bartender but hey, with the language of mixology, there’s plenty of room for some funny recipes. You have until 2am eastern… read more »

Black Ships by Jo Graham

I have a few reviews to write, two of which are for books that aren’t really romance. One is part of a series that follows a growing romance (hur hur) and one is a YA novel that isn’t a romance though it has vague romantic elements.

And then there this book. It’s not a romance. It does not have a happy ending as per a romance novel. It has a peaceful ending. There’s a big ol multi-sided love triangle with mutiple layers going around and around. There’s adventure on the high seas, oracles, war, parables, retellings of mythology, and very delicious men. But this is not a romance.

However, I read it, and I have a few things to say, but this won’t be like my normal romance reviews where I go off on some tangent about man-titty or swords or something.

Round Four Results, 2 of 2

I think this will upset some brackets, hmm?

Results in DA BWAHA Round Four, 1 of 2

In the Roberts/Bird showdown, Roberts is the decided winner.

Greetings from Novelists Inc

The reception is in a teeny stifling room, but I am three feet from Mary Jo Putney and I am so excited - and a dork of epic proportions - that I had to sit down. Must not squee. Must not squee….

Guess That Lonely Heart: No One Guessed The Seagull Book?!

I am stunned that there is yet an unsolved Guess That Lonely Heart. Stunned, I tell you. And so proud of myself, but that is not important here.

What is important, is that this book be recognized! And the person who identifies it gets titles and prizes! So! I post it again and add a clue. The first person to add up author name + heroine’s name + title of book will win a snappy fresh and guaranteed unsullied Smart Bitch Title™ AND a $10 gift certificate to Amazon.com.

Seagull loving real estate maven first initial B. seeks political cartoonist to inspire me to find confidence in myself, and perhaps also the long-nosed creature hiding in your pants, I mean, in your artistic aspirations. You might mock me and my efforts at helping other women in the beginning, but ultimately you’ll inspire me while I inspire you. And we’ll go to my reunion, or something, and then get it on till the breakadawn on a rug in front of the fireplace, with nary a mention of rug burn.

Friday Videos: Game time!

Have I mentioned that I love Japan? I am fascinated with all things Japanese, probably because I have a Japanese middle name and had to explain it often enough that I got curious about all things Japanese, and how funky fresh and different Japan is from the USA.

So I say this with love and respect: some Japanese video games are WEIRD. WEIRD in a way that is AWESOME. SO Awesome that if I could buy this game for Candy, I so would, because I know nothing would make her Bitch panties twist with glee like the opportunity to wipe the sweat putules off of lean, androgynous Japanese cartoon dudes.

Thanks to Star Opal for the link.

Round Three Results, 1 and 2 of 4

Here are the results for the first poll in the Round Three voting. Stay tuned for more!

Link Round Up

Want to pay $10 for a guide to making money selling romance paperback on eBay? Sorry - pay $10 for an 11-page guide on making the bucks selling romance on eBay?

And, thanks to SonomaLass for this link, and the cold medicine I’m on for the following rambling reaction: Robin Hobb rants about blogs. Specifically, why blogs on LJ are the writer’s worst friend evah.

The nights and the days, the hours in which you used to write, edit and rewrite your deathless prose will slowly, drip by drip, character by character, key press by key press, be drained into Live Journal. The blogs there will grow fat and swollen, round bellied with the creativity they have siphoned off from your fingertips. The other trapped writers there will clutch at you with bloodless fingers, offering you feedback, praise for your advice, tales of their new kittens and recipes for turnovers. And you will read them all, every word, filling your mind with the daily doings of those other poor damned souls. And you will write responses. And when night falls, you will think that you have been a writer today.

But you have merely blogged….

Blog. Blog. Blog.… read more »

Sweet Valley High, v. 2008

Thank you to December Quinn and Victoria Dahl who both forwarded me links, each with eerily similar subject lines that said, “OMG DID YOU SEE THIS?”

In a great steaming pile of “Huh?” the books that led me to read romance, the books I both love and skewer with abandon, the books (or book) I read last August and reviewed because really, while they reinforced everything I hated about being a teenager, they were a huge part of my teen years - those books are being re-released by Random House. Yup. It’s Sweet Valley time again. The gravy train that is books-not-actually-written-by-Francine-Pascal is pulling into yet another station. Ka-ching!

Indiana Legislature: NO, YOU CAN’T HAS SEXUALLY EXPLICIT MATERIALS. NOT YOURS!

Heads up: This is a news item followed by decently lengthy musings on American legal, political and cultural attitudes towards sex. If you’re interested in the news, and only the news, don’t bother expanding the text.

Thanks to many readers who alerted us to the fact that many booksellers in Indiana got their dudgeons in high gear after the Governor signed HEA 1042 into law.

The bill requires that any person (i.e., any “human being, corporation, limited liability company, partnership, unincorporated association, or governmental entity”) intending to sell “sexually explicit materials” pay a $250 filing fee with the Secretary of State, who then registers that person as a vendor of sexually explicit material and informs the appropriate county officials (usually the local zoning board). The law kicks in July 1, 2008; businesses in existence June 30 and prior do not need to register themselves unless they move.

Of especial interest are some of the definitions used by the legislation:

Chapter 16.4. Sexually Explicit Materials Sec. 1. As used in this chapter, “person” has the meaning set forth in IC 35-41-1-22. Sec. 2. (a) As used in this chapter, “sexually explicit materials” means a product or service: (1) that is… read more »