Must Love Wieners: They Went There

So yesterday this came* in the mail among the new releases*:

Must Love Wieners - a couple on a park bench holding hands with a daschund on the ground in front of them YES THAT IS THE TITLE

Yup. Must Love Wieners ( A | BN | K | G | AB ). 

I think my reaction was pretty much this:

Dude from the office saying OH. Unimpressed.

 

I get that covers and titles and images, that’s all marketing, designed to make a book stand out* and leap off the shelf toward the reader.

But wow. Must. Love. Wieners.

That’s a whole other level.

Steve Carrel holding a half eaten banana captioned OH YOU WENT THERE. FUNNY.

I suppose it was only a matter of time, since we have no shortage of pun-tastic or contemporary-referencing titles in historicals.

Annie shrugging with an OH WELL expression on her face

Cover and title trends evolve quickly, and it’s what’s inside* that I’m actually after, so whatevs.

But then, oh, but THEN.

There’s the cover copy for Must Love Wieners. 

Oh, yes.

Hold onto yourselves*, here.

Piper Summers works like a dog juggling three jobs to put herself through veterinary school―driving taxis, delivering pizzas, and singing telegrams. Thankfully, Piper has her devoted dachshund Colin to help her keep things in line. That is, until she gets fired…and someone throws her a bone that is too good to resist.

Captain Kirk looking like he's going to protest, then resigning to mild interest

 

Aiden Caldwell is an Armani ad come to life―a billionaire CEO who’s just adopted a dachshund from the rescue center where Piper volunteers. He’s hot on Piper’s tail to be his personal dog walker…but he may be after more than a walker for his wiener.

 

Dude from the office holding one hand up like WELP THERE YOU GO then grimacing

The gorgeous, spirited Piper is everything he’s ever wanted from a woman―and more. But can Piper ever love, and trust, a man who has never learned to open his heart―or has she bitten off more than she can chew?

exasperated-dumbledore raising both arms then shrugging

 

AWWW YESSSSS.

They REALLY DID go there.

THEY WENT FULL WIENER!

via GIPHY

This day is like a holiday inside the Pink Palace. Not only are the gifs throbbing* fast and furious, but Amanda got to legit message me and say, “Wiener is in.”

Golf clap gif of subtle, sarcastic clapping

To quote RedHeadedGirl, “Someone is super proud of that cover copy.”

Christopher Walken biting his lower lip, dancing suggestively in an AWYEAH gesture.

I’m kind of sad that the book entering my house was the first I’d heard of it.

What a glorious day to be alive! Right?! Right!

We can all go back to bed now. Full Wiener has been achieved.

*you know all these puns were intended.

Comments are Closed

  1. DonnaMarie says:

    This is.. I can’t…Snort…breathe! Bwaaahahahahahaha! Snort! Coffee splert…

  2. Eli says:

    I had to go look for the publisher name, was so sure that it would be an Indy, but it’s not. To have been in the room for those meetings…

  3. Cristie says:

    Okay so between this and the cover snark link in the previous post I just laughed more than I have all week. Thanks for making my day.

  4. Tiff says:

    And who does love a good Wiener story.

  5. Vanessa says:

    I think I need to read this.

    No. I do. I need to read this. The weinerful cover copy has convinced me.

  6. Tiff says:

    Dear sweet god see what happens? I’m laughing so hard I can’t see to type! Ugh, Lets try that again!

    And who doesn’t love a good wiener story.

  7. kitkat9000 says:

    You know, generally speaking, the “cutesier” something is, the more I tend to dislike/hate/abhor said something. I’m not sure if this level of OTT is better or worse. I mean, the entire book could be filled with this, not just the copy. Dear gods, the horror. No, just no. >shudder<

    Will someone who's at least somewhat cynical* take one for the team by reading this and give the rest of us a heads up? I can only handle so much saccharine sweetness at a time and the copy alone is activating my gag reflex. I don't think reading this is in my future and will need to experience this vicariously through someone else's review.

    * – and by least I mean very.

    PS: I also can't help but wonder what the author thinks of it all (glad it's being published, horror over the title and blurb, ambivalent at best? Who knows?)

  8. Ren Benton says:

    I’m writhing in book-description hell right now (fuck marketing and the horse of adjectives, adverbs, cliches, and abstractions it rode in on), so I can tell you everybody involved with this one IS really pleased because it did exactly what it’s supposed to do: get attention.

  9. Karin says:

    I am longing to read this, I hope it’s not a dog.

  10. Michelle in Texas says:

    I’m just commenting so I can see the other comments. I DEARLY hope this gets read and reviewed. Just not by me. I’m diabetic, and can’t take that much saccharine sweetness.

  11. mel burns says:

    Posts like this are why SBTB is first on my bookmarks bar……:)

  12. KellyM says:

    I would read it but I am not spending $5.99 to do it. It is only worth a $2.99 or less risk for me. I am save my money for the SBTB ebook sale posts. 🙂

  13. Cyranetta says:

    I keep getting distracted by how the arms of the two on the cover just seem wrong, like they switched them. Either the woman’s is unnaturally large, and the man’s unnaturally small (hurr! to keep in theme), or they are bending the wrong way (hurr. hurr!)

  14. Cas says:

    I’m in shock that this is actually a book, not a joke. I need some tea, quickly.
    Aside from that: I keep seeing covers with people holding hands behind a bench, as seen above. Is this a thing? It would seem to be so uncomfortable. Maybe my shoulders are just not especially limber.

  15. LizM says:

    Author interviewed on Bookpage today. It’s probably a decent read!

    http://bookpage.com/the-book-case/20175-dump-trucks-dachshunds-double-entendres#.V6ziTKZFB9B

  16. I am the proud owner of a wiener, or should I say, MY WIENER OWNS ME!

    What can I say? It’s a dachshund* thing.

    *The breed name actually means “badger hound”, not “looks like a dick”. That would be the Naked Mole Rat.

  17. KellyM says:

    @Cyranetta

    Her arm seems fine but it almost looks like she is pining his arm back unnaturally. Yikes, nothing says love like a dislocated shoulder.

  18. Amanda says:

    Hmm. This is on my TBR pile. I’m looking out for any reviews to know if it’s worth reading or not.

  19. JennyME says:

    Welp, I think I know what I’m getting my sisters for Christmas this year.

  20. Susan says:

    @Karin. Haha. Bless you.

  21. Why does he adopt a dog if he needs a dog walker? Over here you aren’t allowed to adopt a rescue dog unless you are home a large proportion of the day, because what’s the point in having a dog just to leave it alone and have to hire someone to care for it?
    Missing the point…

  22. Abby Normal says:

    I can’t get past the heroine. Between driving taxis, delivering pizza, the singing telegram schtick, volunteering at the shelter, AND being a dog-walker, when does she go to vet school? Scratch that, when does she sleep?

  23. Michelle W says:

    Best Post Ever!!

  24. Olivia says:

    Seriously I would so do something like this if I was a romance writer.

    Sequel idea: “Must Love Pussies”?

  25. @Olivia–Oh dear. Now it almost has to happen.

  26. LizM says:

    Also had a similar reaction a few years ago when I saw the cover of Wallbanger. Couldn’t believe ‘they went there!” and were readers really gonna buy that, etc etc. Well, we all know how that worked out. Anne Clayton is super popular right now and is keeping the puntastic titles going. See also Nuts.
    https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=wallbanger&rh=n%3A283155%2Ck%3Awallbanger

  27. LauraL says:

    I proudly admit I read Must Love Wieners. I bought it on release day since rescue dog romances are like super catnip for me and the title, seriously, how could I pass that up? Funny read and the wiener jokes don’t end until the fairy tale/tail ending.

  28. SB Sarah says:

    @LauraL: Very cool! Thank you for letting us know! So you’d recommend it for fans of light, funny contemporary romance?

  29. Beth says:

    And my MS would be turned down by the publishing world if submitted. Seriously?

  30. LauraL says:

    @ SB Sarah – Yes, a light, funny, contemporary. A bit of slapstick like Kristan Higgins, Jamie Farrell, or Jill Shalvis, but there is also a little mystery to be solved and, of course, the adopt don’t shop message. 🙂

  31. Cas says:

    @ LauraL — That’s great — I love anything that puts the word out that so many animals need loving homes!

  32. I’m dying! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry at these puns. You’ll have to let us know how the actual book is

  33. Jill-Marie says:

    I’ma gonna climb up on my lonely soapbox here re the “adopt, don’t shop” message, and I realize this is totally off-topic. I have two beloved shelter saves. I also have two beloved dogs from responsible, ethical breeders; these dogs are sound, sane, excellent representatives of centuries of careful selection, and they are my competition partners. So, I’d propose tweaking the message: “Adopt, if you’re not willing to be a savvy shopper.” Backyard breeders, puppy mills, “we want our kids to see the miracle of life” people, twits who move and leave the pets behind — those are the problem. Not the good, dedicated breeders who devote their lives and endless buckets of money to the betterment of their chosen breed.

    But I’ll still probably read this book. 🙂

  34. Jenn says:

    There is no “working your way through vet school” – there is borrowing student loans through vet school. There isn’t really time for one job, much less three and being involved with a rescue group. Though having a billionaire boyfriend to pay off your student loans would be helpful…

    Jill-Marie – I’m also a proud owner of rescued and purchased dogs. What do you complete in?

  35. Jill-Marie says:

    @Jenn: Agility, obedience and rally, Barn Hunt, lure coursing, all things Jack Russell (racing, conformation, earthwork, nosework, field hunting trials, backyard body counts ;-)) … my dogs now fill my sporting needs since 13 knee surgeries ended my equine competition career (hunters, jumpers and a wee bit of eventing).

    And that’s the absolute truth re vet school. An equine vet friend says she’s always too broke and too tired to get into trouble or fun, and it’s been that way since she started school.

  36. Kristen says:

    I snort laughed my way through this page and then promptly went to look for the book on NetGalley. Finished it just the other day and can report that I found it delightful, especially for a debut. Growth areas for sure, but a fun read. I agree with the slapsticky Kristan Higgins comparison.

  37. SB Sarah says:

    Thank you for the quick review – I’m really glad you liked it!

  38. […] the puns are no joke. Yes, the title is a touch OTT. SBTB covered this issue way better than I ever could (prepare for snort laughing), so let’s just get that out of the way now. Because y’all, […]

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