Romance Novel Reader Workout XV

burly bicep holding stack of booksReady for this week's heaving, throbbing workout? Grab your purplest of purple prose, because it's time for Romance Novel Reader Workout #15! Purple prose is most often found in older historical romances with fuchsia and teal on the covers, and possibly a foil hologram at the top. Or some mullets – those, too.

Like the previous workouts, can do all these exercises with a mat and your own bodyweight. No additional weights are needed unless you want to use some.

Standard disclaimers still apply: although I play one on tv, I'm not a physician. I can recommend books to read but I can't discern your state of health or your physical limitations so by all means work hard but be kind to yourself. To put it another way, ask your doctor before beginning any exercise regimen.

I will tell you that you should drink water and read books, but that's kind of common sense, right? Right. 

And yes! By reader request, I have a convenient PDF of all 16 workouts so far. Each page has two images on it, and the PDF is 1.6MB in size. You are welcome to print and distribute the workouts, give them as gifts, or use them as bookmarks.

Download the Romance Novel Workout PDF Collection here.

And now, Romance Novel Reader Workout, Part XV, in graphic form suitable for pinning, sharing, printing, and pointing at!

There’s no such thing as too much purple prose. Let’s find some more! Select a romance with as much purple prose as you can find. Any mention of the following, do the corresponding exercise, then repeat at the end of the chapter.His pants house something made of    velvet steel *			     25 jump squats</p>
<p>Possible sighting of a<br />
	  heaving manroot *				     1 min. wall sit<br />
The hero has a   throbbing manhood       25 plank jacks<br />
Some part of his body   turgid 		     25 crunches</p>
<p>Any of the above are 	  probing skillfully * 			            25 v-ups</p>
<p>She holds any of the above in a<br />
	  silken grip,  but not<br />
	with her hands.					     50 skaters</p>
<p>Any mention of   loins,  possibly<br />
	  thrusting  or   heaving     		     25 burpees</p>
<p>He   roars his pleasure *				     25 lunges</p>
<p>				*Thanks to Elizabeth, Shawn, Kay, Julia, Aliza, Catherine, Destiny, Mya, & Lisa

If you have questions or suggestions for future workouts, please share, either in the comments or via email.

And remember the immortal warrior cry of the working out! Unless you faint, puke, or die, KEEP READING! AND BREATHING! 

Thank you to BigStock for the booklifting image!

Fun And Games

Comments are Closed

  1. 1
    Peggy says:

    Have you used never gotten so hard so fast yet? I spotted it in 3 books in the last week.

  2. 2
    Monique D says:

    I love those !!!! I actually came across, what was it again, velvet-covered steel ? this weekend, in a wonderful book; wonders never cease, do they ! And I bought the Beverly Jenkins book, at last one was on sale in Canada ! Thanks !

  3. 3
    LauraL says:

    @ Peggy—seen that a few times lately, too. And then it keeps growing!

    Haven’t seen any heaving manroots in a long time, well, in books.

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