Hines, part-time cover model with the hottest insulin pump EVER, has come up with the awesome. After the pointed hilarity of his two collections of cover mocking exploring the differences in how men and women are posed on book covers, he's come up with a most majestic challenge:
I’m asking people to donate to the Aicardi Syndrome Foundation. In exchange, I will give you what the internet has deemed my most important contribution to society: ridiculous cover poses. All you have to do is email me at ASF@jimchines.com letting me know how much you donated. If you give more than $25, please include a copy of your receipt from the foundation.
I’ll pick donors at random to suggest covers for me to try to duplicate. My only rule is that it has to be PG-13 or less. As an added bonus, if we hit $1000, I’ll challenge award-winning and bestselling author John Scalzi to a competitive pose-off.
Aicardi Syndrome is a rare genetic disorder that affects mostly girls, and is incurable at present. From Hines' description, “The Aicardi Syndrome Foundation is pretty much the only source in the United States for funding into research on this condition. The foundation also funds a family conference every two years, paying for hotel rooms, flying in researchers, and even covering many of the meals. It unites families fighting this disease, connecting them to a network of support they might otherwise never find.” Scalzi is in, and the manchest post-off will probably upset the foundations of the internet.
When I looked earlier, the $500 goal had been reached. Now, the $1000 pose-off with Scazli is on like Donkey Kong and I'm expecting epic imagery to come.
Any covers to suggest?
Well played, Mr. Hines. Mad props to you.
By the time I got to the fruitcake, I was crylaughing: The Hater's Guide to the Williams Sonoma Catalog:
I desperately wanted it to say “Set of one” at the end. But anyway, who WOULDN'T like to have special gloves for whenever you have to handle potatoes? Potatoes are dirty and smelly, so it behooves you to wear a pair of gloves that will absorb all that dirt and grime and then get soaked through. Be sure to let them dry on your radiator! I also like that these gloves come with the word POTATO labeled across each one. Late at night, I often go digging through my basement screaming, “WHERE ARE THE GODDAMN POTATO GLOVES?” Because I usually end up grabbing the carrot gloves first, you know?
And now: BOOKS. On SALE. (I'm SORRY.)
Today only: Waking Up Married by Mira Lyn Kelly is free!
Her first thought: “Who are you?”
It's the morning after her cousin's bachelorette party in Vegas and Megan Scott wakes up with the mother of all hangovers. Even worse, she's in a stranger's penthouse having woken up with something else as well—a funny, arrogant, sexy…husband!
Up until now, finding even a boyfriend had seemed impossible—been there, got the broken heart, sworn off men for good. Then a few martinis with Carter…no, Connor Reed and she's gone from first meet to marriage in one night!
Megan wants a lawyer. But Connor's shocking bombshell?
“I don't want a divorce.”
One note: take a look at the dude on that cover. Isn't that the same dude from the cover of Shannon Stacey's All He Ever Desired? I think it is!
He can handle just about anything, except this…
Jax Graham is a member of an elite military team, but when it comes to taking care of his four-year-old son after his ex-wife dies, he's completely clueless.
One person can help him, if he'll let her…
Family therapist Pickett Sessoms knows just how to help a rough, tough Navy SEAL deal with a scared and lonely little boy, but not if he insists on going it alone.
When Jax and his young son Tyler get trapped by a hurricane, Pickett takes them in against her better judgment. Jax figures Pickett's high maintenance, just like all the women he knows, and she figures he's not commitment material. But when an outing turns deadly, Pickett discovers what it means to be a SEAL, and Jax discovers that even a hero needs help sometimes…